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- Yo mama's so hairy, they filmed "Gorillas in the Mist" in her shower.
- Yo mama's so hairy, Bigfoot took a picture of her.
- Yo mama's so hairy, her armpits look like she has Don King in a head lock.
- Yo mama's so hairy, she looks like a Chia pet with a sweater on.
- Yo mama's so hairy, you almost died of rug burn at birth.
- Yo mama's so hairy, she shaves with a weedwacker.
- Yo mama's so hairy, she got a trim and lost 10 pounds.
- Yo mama's so fat, her ass looks like two pigs fighting over a milk dud.
- Yo mama's so fat, her blood type is Ragu.
- Yo mama's so fat, she wears a watch on each arm, one for each time zone.
- Yo mama's so fat, she stepped on a talking scale, and it said "GET THE FUCK OFF!!"
- Yo mama's so fat, the shadow of her ass weighs 50 pounds
- Yo mama's so fat, she stepped on my cat's tail, now I call him "Beaver".
- Yo mama's so fat, when I tried to drive around her, I ran out of gas.
- Yo mama's so fat, when I climbed on top of her, I burned my ass on the
light bulb.
- Yo mama's so fat, she's got more chins than a Chinese phone book.
- Yo mama's so fat, when she hauls ass, she has to make two trips.
- Yo mama's so fat, I had to take a train and two busses just to get on
her good side.
- Yo mama's so fat, I ran around her twice, and got lost.
- Yo mama's so fat, instead of wearing Levis 501 jeans, she wears Levis 1002's.
- Yo mama's so fat, at the zoo, elephants started throwing her peanuts.
- Yo mama's so fat, she puts on lipstick with a paint roller.
- Yo mama's so fat, she's got more rolls than a bakery.
- Yo mama's so fat, she was floating in the ocean, and Spain claimed her
as a new world.
- Yo mama's so fat, she could sell shade.
- Yo mama's so fat, that when God said "Let there be Light", he told her
to move her fat ass out of the way.
- Yo mama's so fat, when I finished having sex with her and tried to roll
off, I was still on her.
- Yo mama's so fat, when I have sex with her, I have to slap her ass and
ride the wave in.
- Yo mama's so fat, when she bends over, we go into daylight savings time.
- Yo mama's so fat, the telephone company gave her two area codes.
- Yo mama's so fat, when she backs up, she beeps.
- Yo mama's so fat, when she takes a shower, her feet don't get wet.
- Yo mama's so fat, she bumps into people when she's sitting down.
- Yo mama's so fat, when your father mounts her, his ears pop.
- Yo mama's so ugly, she's like Taco Bell. When people see her, they run
for the border.
- Yo mama's so ugly, it looks like her neck threw up.
- Yo mama's so ugly, rice crispies won't even talk to her.
- Yo mama's so ugly, she scares people even with the lights out.
- Yo mama's so ugly, they pay her to put her clothes on in strip joints.
- Yo mama's so ugly, when your dad wants to have sex in the car, he tells
her to get out.
- Yo mama's so ugly, that your father takes her to work with him so that
he doesn't have to kiss her goodbye.
- Yo mama's so ugly, I took her to the zoo, guy at the door said "Thanks
for bringing her back."
- Yo mama's so ugly, I can fuck her in any position and its still doggy style.
- Yo mama's so stupid, she asked you "What is the number for 911?"
- Yo mama's so stupid, she took a ruler to bed to see how long she slept.
- Yo mama's so stupid, she sold the car for gas money.
- Yo mama's so stupid, that under "Education" on her job application, she
put "Hooked on Phonics".
- Yo mama's so stupid, she failed her blood test.
- Yo mama's so stupid, she thinks Taco Bell is a Mexican phone company.
- Yo mama's so stupid, she spent twenty minutes lookin' at an orange juice
box because it said concentrate.
- Yo mama's so stupid, she put lipstick on her forehead because she wanted
to makeup her mind.
- Yo mama's so stupid, she gave birth to you.
- Yo mama's so stupid, she thinks fruit punch is a gay boxer.
- Yo mama's so stupid, she thinks sexual battery is something in a dildo.
- Yo mama's so stupid, she sent me a fax with a stamp on it.
- Yo mama's so stupid, she was on the corner giving out potato chips
yellin' "Free Lays!"
- Yo mama's so stupid, she tried to throw a bird off a cliff.
- Yo mama's so stupid, she tried to drown a fish.
- Yo mama's so stupid, when the computer said "Press any key to continue",
she couldn't find the 'Any' key.
- Yo mama's so stupid, she wiped her ass before she took a shit.
- Yo mama's so stupid, she went to Dr. Dre for a pap smear.
- Yo mama's so stupid, when I was drowning and yelled for a life saver,
she said "Cherry or grape?"
- Yo mama's so stupid, she sold the house to pay the mortgage.
- Yo mama's like a T.V., even a two-year-old could turn her on.
- Yo mama's like a bowling ball. She's picked up, fingered, and then
thrown in the gutter.
- Yo mama's like a rifle...four cocks and she's loaded.
- Yo mama's like a bubble gum machine...five cents a blow.
- Yo mama's like Chinese food...sweet, sour, and cheap.
- Yo mama's like a birthday cake, everybody gets a piece.
- Yo mama's like Burger King... Your way, right away.
- Yo mama's like a squirrel, she's always got some nuts in her mouth.
- Yo mama's like 7-Eleven... open all night, hot to go, and for 89 cents
you can get a slurpy.
- Yo mama's like a toilet, fat, white, and smells like shit.
- Yo mama's like the Bermuda Triangle, they both swallow a lot of seamen.
- Yo mama's like a street lamp, you can find her turned on at night on any
street corner.
- Yo mama's like a telephone booth, open to the public, costs a quarter,
and guys go in and out all day.
- Yo mama's like a 747, she has a very large cockpit.
- Yo mama's like a microwave, one button and she's hot.
- Yo mama's like speakers, loud, ugly, lives in a box, and you can turn
her up, down, on, and off.
- Yo mama's like a mail box, open day and night.
- Yo mama's like a bag of potato chips, "Free-To-Lay."
- Yo mama's like a turtle, once she's on her back she's fucked.
- Yo mama's like a paper towel, she picks up all kinds of slimy wet stuff.
- Yo mama's like a bowling ball, you can fit three fingers in.
- Yo mama's like a bowling ball, she always winds up in the gutter.
- Yo mama's like cheap liquor, tastes like shit.
- Yo mama's like an aircraft carrier, has a flat top, a big bottom,
cruises up and down the coast, and picks up 100 sailors in every port.
- Yo mama's like a bus, guys climb on and off her all day long.
- Yo mama's like a Christmas tree, everybody hangs balls on her.
- Yo mama's like a door knob, everybody gets a turn.
- Yo mama's like Dominoes Pizza, something for nothing.
- Yo mama's like Dominoes Pizza, one call does it all.
- Yo mama's like Pizza Hut, if she isn't there in 30 minutes... it's free.
- Yo mama's like Sprint, 10 cents a minute anywhere in the country.
- Yo mama's like a carpenter's dream, flat as a board and easy to nail.
- Yo mama's like a gas station... you gotta pay before you pump.
- Yo mama's like a goalie: she changes her pads after three periods.
- Yo mama's like a light switch, even a little kid can turn her on.
- Yo mama's like a telephone, even a 3 year old can pick her up.
- Yo mama's like a postage stamp, you lick her, stick her, then send her away.
- Yo mama's like a dollar bill, she gets handled all across the country.
- Yo mama's like a brick, dirty, flat on both sides, and always getting
laid by Mexicans.
- Yo mama's like a race car driver... she burns a lot of rubbers.
- Yo mama's like a railroad track, she gets laid all over the country.
- Yo mama's like a screen door, after a couple of bangs she loosens up.
- Yo mama's like a shotgun, one cock and she blows.
- Yo mama's like a Toyota, "OOooh what a feeling!"
- Yo mama's like a vacuum cleaner... a real good suck.
- Yo mama's like a vacuum cleaner... she sucks, blows, and then gets laid
in the closet.
- Yo mama's like an ice cream cone... everyone gets a lick.
- Yo mama's like the Panama Canal, vessels full of seamen pass through her
everyday.
- Yo mama's like a refrigerator, everyone puts their meat in her.
- Yo mama's like cake mix, 15 servings per package!
- Yo mama's like an elevator, guys go up and down on her all day.
- Yo mama's like Denny's... open 24 hours.
- Yo mama's like McDonalds... Billions and Billions served.
- Yo mama's like McDonalds... What you want is what you get.
- Yo mama's like mustard, she spreads easy.
- Yo mama's like the Pillsbury dough boy... everybody pokes her.
- Yo mama's like lettuce, $1 a head.
- Yo mama's like a hardware store, 25 cents a screw.
- I saved yo mama's life today... I killed a shit-eating dog on the way over.
- I could have been yo daddy but the monkey beat me up the stairs.
- I could have been yo daddy, but the monkey in front of me in line didn't
use a condom.
- If my dog had a face as ugly as yo mama's, I'd shave his ass and make
him walk backwards.
- The difference between yo mama and a jumbo jet: not everyone's been on a
jumbo jet.
- The difference between yo mama and a bowling ball : You can only fit
three fingers in a bowling ball.
- The difference between Yo mama and a pretzel is that a pretzel doesn't
have my nuts on it's chin.
- I know yo mama's favorite day at work is "Take your son to work day." I
bet you had fun testing condoms.
- I'm gonna cut yo mama down so hard crack couldn't get her high.
- You suck, yo sista' sucks, and Yo mama would suck too... If I had a nickel.
- You suck... your mom does too but she charges.
- I don't have a mama... My dad and I just use yours.
- Tell yo mama to stop wearing different color lipstick, because I have a
rainbow dick.
- Why is it yo mama won't take my money? Does she just like sucking my dick?
- Let's get off moms, 'cause I just got off yours.
- Let's get off moms, 'cause she can't handle those five men on her now.
