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FDHS 1973 Class Reunion- “A Bald Man’s View” by Gary Uecke

 

(Hey everyone…take the time to read this.  It’s long, it’s sappy, it’s boring, but enough about me naked (bada bing!).  I think you just might get something out of it.  If not, then blame David Cady because he made me do it.  And my apologies to the spouses of my classmates.  I will call everyone by their maiden names for +

ease of reference.)

 

 

The anxiety level began to build as I drove down from Minneapolis for the reunion.  I already knew that many of my closest friends growing up (Seth Thomas, Jeff Carlson, Nick Henderson, guys from the old Hawley neighborhood) weren’t going to make it or had not replied.  I had been pretty excited because I had spoken to Chuck Underbrink and Melanie Rosales (who are married) and they were planning on attending.  But alas, when I spoke to Melanie on Thursday, her best friend’s mother had passed away the day before and they would be attending the funeral instead.  Monty and Sheryl Kersten, with whom I’ve bonded with more after high school than in it, also weren’t attending.  The only guy I knew for sure who would be there was Bill Habhab.

 

So as I neared Ft. Dodge, my anxiety manifested itself in the form of an ever-tightening stomach.  You see, I hadn’t been back to Dodge in almost 17 years.  That was the first issue.  How much had it changed?  Would I be able to find my way around?  I wasn’t even sure I would be able to find the Starlight without stopping at some gas station and asking directions like some frickin’ tourist.

 

But that was secondary to the main culprit that was knocking around in my head.  Would anyone remember me?  Hell, this wasn’t even my graduating class.  I had moved my senior year to Wisconsin and had missed out on all the fun and games and trouble I was so looking forward to sharing with the gang from the ‘hood.  Layer on top of that the fact that I had changed dramatically since I had left the confines of FDHS.  I was about 60 pounds heavier and totally bald.  What the hell was I even going to this thing for anyway?

 

I cruised through the old neighborhood just for giggles.  The trees looked HUGE compared to what I remembered, but everything else was pretty much the same as I remembered it.  I swung by Jeff Carlson’s old house, and much to my surprise, someone was home and “C A Carlson” was still on the mailbox.  So I stopped and rang the doorbell, and Jeff’s mom opened the door.  I said, “Hi Mrs. Carlson, it’s Gary Uecke,” to which she let out a gasp and quickly invited me in.  We chatted for about 45 minutes before I finally had to break away to get out to the Starlight.  It was so good seeing her again, although her husband had passed away several years earlier.  You sure lose touch when you no longer have family living in town.

 

I felt much better as I headed out to the Starlight.  One of the main reasons I had decided to attend this reunion is that many of my friend’s parents were getting to that age where they just might not be around much longer, or had already passed away.  Jeff Carlson’s father, Nick Henderson’s dad, both gone.  They were a major part of my childhood.  I remember Jeff and I stealing cigarettes from his dad’s stash and having our first smoke out on the swing set in his neighbor’s yard.  Camel Straights…I got dizzy immediately and about puked.  “What the hell was the attraction with these things,” I thought to myself.  Do you remember where you were when you had your first cigarette?

 

That newfound confidence was soon shattered, as I could not find the Starlight.  I thought it was somewhere near the FD Country Club across the Karl King Bridge, but instead of heading north, I made my way towards ICCC and then towards the hospital.  I had this thought that maybe it was out by the Crossroads Center, so headed that direction, only to come up empty.  I was just about to swallow my pride and ask directions (guys, you know how desperate an act this was) when I had some divine intervention.  I looked up and there, in big bold letters, was a billboard saying “Starlight Village, straight ahead to 169, north 2 miles.”  I’m gonna make it.

 

I checked in at the Starlight and saw a group at a table across from front entry, but didn’t recognize anyone, so I got my key and headed to the room.  I was running pretty late now, and I had to step up the pace.  I showered, shaved (which is quite the undertaking when you have to do your whole head too), and dressed as fast as I could.  I was really getting excited to see some friendly faces and get the ball rolling. 

 

I headed down to the lobby, but the table now was empty and nobody was milling around outside.  So I just walked through the door and into the room.  I stopped and scanned the entire room from left and right and DIDN”T RECOGNIZE ONE SINGLE PERSON.  A dread came over me as I realized I had not seen any signs announcing that this was the room for the FDHS reunion.  “I must be in the wrong room,” I thought to myself, and spun around before anyone could ask me what the hell I was doing at their party.  I hurried out the door and into the lobby.  Just as I was starting to panic, I suddenly was seeing someone I recognized.  Steve Engeman was chatting up someone, so I walked right up and declared, “Boy, you haven’t changed a bit Steve.”  He had no clue who I was, so introduced myself.  My first friendly face, what a relief.  Then up came Dude Netland, and the reunion had begun.

 

Now the people and names were coming at me full force.  Barb Kurtz came out the door and I recognized her right away.  Then Diane Rupp, now a blonde (looked great…of course, I’m jealous of anyone with hair).  I asked where Bill Habhad was, because I had told him earlier in the day that I was going to be his date.  We would get the “gay” rumors started right away, I had told him.  So I found Bill and went up and gave him a big kiss on the cheek (his face, not the other cheek you sick bastards).  And right beside him was my soul mate from high school, Laurie Sears.  She was a major reason why I came to this thing.  We were the closest of friends for so many years and I desperately wanted to spend time with her.  I had made the 10-year reunion, but hadn’t really spent much time conversing with Laurie, which I regretted.  I had hooked up with Todd Tripp at that ballroom on 1st Avenue North where we had the first nights festivities, and the next thing I know I’m waking up somewhere on Sunday afternoon. 

 

Then it was a rapid succession of people…Mark Clausen, Karen Putnam, Kathi Marchi, Janice Kolesar, Marilea Bumgarner, Renee Holm, Jeff Grell, Julie Amo, Roxanne Castagnoli, Chris Carlson, Kaye Murphy, Penny Rathermal, Mike Thompson, Steve Zuspann, Jenny Johnson, Deb Van Gundy.  Just a rapid-fire, “Hey, how are you?  Good to see you.  Oh my gosh!  Look who’s here?” until all of the sudden, the lights come on and we have to wind up the night.  Need to find a place for a nightcap.

 

Out in the lobby, still more people I hadn’t seen inside…Denise Cramer, Jan Carlson, Jim Peters.  Jim, Bill Habhab and I decide to head for a watering hole before last call and head out.  I don’t even know where we went, but it was great time.  Turns out that Jim knows one of my best friends and roommate from college.  What a small world.

 

We return to the Starlight looking for more trouble, and find it when we stumble upon a party in Penny Rathermal’s room.  I run into Tom Gumm, and he tells me he knows my sister and brother-in-law pretty well.  So we share some swigs off a tequila bottle and the party is off and running.  Now here’s a guy who I probably never said three words to my whole high school career and I’m sharing hits of tequila and having a grand old time.  That’s what reunions are all about…sharing laughs with old friends and opening the door to new ones. 

 

Almost 4:00 so decide to call it a night.  What a first day it turned out to be.  I’m sad that some of the people that were there tonight weren’t going to be making the Saturday night festivities, but just ecstatic that so many people, friends that I had grown up with, sat next to in homeroom since 7th grade, and shared so many laughs with over the years, were going to be there for another round of fun.

 

Saturday morning wasn’t on my radar.  I woke right up at the crack of noon.  Felt great though.  That tequila that Penny had brought didn’t rear its ugly head like had happened so many times before.  I had planned to see Seth’s parents that afternoon, so headed over to the old neighborhood once more.  Several hours later, it was back to the Starlight to get revved up for another night.

 

I arrive and the hits keep coming.  I run into Ron Behrens, Linda Salvatore, Rich Licht, Brad Schubring, Randy Derrig, and Sherri Ruge.  I met a guy I didn’t remember from high school named David Cady.  We start sharing stories and he tells me how he moved to Ft. Dodge his sophomore year and how he resented that for almost a year and a half.  I could instantly relate because moving your senior year is just such a bummer.  These are the people you grew up with, and it all leads up to your senior year, and I would be spending it with a bunch of strangers.  You resent your parents, you resent your new school, and you resent the world.  Here’s a guy who knew exactly what I was talking about and had felt the same things.  Another guy who I didn’t know in high school that I bonded with.  The night’s off to a great start.

 

Dinner was about to begin when Tom Gumm grabbed me and told me to sit with them at the reserved table.  I guess bonding with tequila will do that for you.  I was reminded of all the Jimmy Buffett songs and now they meant a little more to me.  I sat with Barb Kurtz and her husband Bob, Tom, Laurie Sears, Jenny Johnson and Janice Kolesar (I hope I didn’t leave anyone out).  We ate and then Barb got up to introduce the speakers, Laurie and Diane Rupp.  Barb sat down and threatened to get me up there, but I thought she was kidding.  After a few remarks from those ladies, Lettie Lumsden got up and awarded prizes from the golf tournament that morning.  I’m going to have to go golfing next year.  There were some pretty good prizes included. 

 

Then it happened.  Barb and Tom were goading me to get up and say something.  They weren’t kidding after all.  Never missing an opportunity to make an ass of myself, I decided what the heck, and up I went. Turns out talking in front of people isn’t one of my hang-ups.  Who knew?  After relating bits stolen from Robin Williams (my apologies to Greg Merryman) and some anecdotal humor from junior and senior high, I finally sat back down at the “cool table.” 

 

After Cindy Green made some announcements and showed us all how to chug beer, Barb turned the night over to the DJ.  He dedicated the first song to me.  It was “Hair” from the musical of the same name and it was the perfect lead-in to the rest of the evening.  Ran into more people…Clark Fletcher (in the dinner line), Sue Crinnigan, Paula Walker, Kris Ernst, Doug Brand, and Steve Haviland.  Man, this had turned out to be just a great evening, and it was just getting started.

 

Dancing ensued, and the rest of the night was a continued hit.  Turned out the biggest dancing songs of the night were AC/DC and Aerosmith.  Who knew we had such a hard rock edge?  I started noticing some people that I didn’t recognize at all, until I figured out they were from another reunion.  Barb had let them in and they were having a great time without distracting from our night.  I thought that was great.

 

The night came to an all too abrupt end, although it ran later than the previous night.  We all kind of milled around for a brief period and tried to decide what to do next, but I think the damage had been done as most people headed for the exits.  There was a party in the same room by the pool, but Ft. Dodge’s finest showed up to break that up around 3:30.  And so ended the 30th reunion.

 

I know I’ve bored you all to tears with this long-winded account of the weekends festivities, but as I drove back to Minneapolis on Sunday, many thoughts crossed my mind.  First, I want to thank everyone for making me feel as if I had never left.  The many thoughts and memories that were directed at me helped make up a little for the fact that I didn’t get to share my senior year with you all.  I just had the best time.  A special thanks to Barb for the wonderful work she did on pulling this thing off.  Most of us will probably never know what it takes to organize a reunion and then to have it come off as flawlessly as it did.  Kudos again Barb!

 

But here’s the crux of my thoughts as I made my way north.  What a pity that so many people missed out on an opportunity to reconnect with the very people that had helped define them.  Here, in one place, were the friends who had shared those awkward years of adolescence right on through to the culmination of your life at that point, graduation.  These were the people that shared those moments, all in one place, and all you had to do was show up.  We all thought that we were so very alone as we grew up, and that the things we went though were unique unto ourselves.  But let me tell you, we were all just trying to find our way, to fit into the grand scheme of things, to try to be accepted.  And sure, our lives have moved on from those times and you can’t go back.  But you can sure revisit them, and that’s what makes these reunions so important.  They are good for the soul.

 

Don’t miss the next one.  If not for yourself, then for the people who thought of and missed seeing you at this reunion.  Who missed reveling in your company and celebrating your friendship.  Life is such a precious commodity, and these opportunities may not always present themselves.  We’ve lost a few more souls along the way, and odds are we’ll lose some more before we see each other again in five years.  And to those who have lost parents, friends, siblings, spouses and children recently (you know who you are), just keep in mind that your friends are thinking of you and wishing you peace and serenity.

 

Until we meet again, take care.

 

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