The bunny was only outside for a minute, making apparent obscene gestures towards children on the street outside, when the police department showed up. Thanks to lots of talking from your narrator, the incident was forgotten. Well, that fifty bucks we paid the officer probably helped a bit also.
We seen a good buddy of ours, Joe, riding by on his bike. It's a custom stunt bike. Well, EB (that'd be the easter bunny) wanted to ride on the bike, or he had to pee...we're unsure which, he was dancing around an awful lot...
Before long, the bunny was acting stupid. Here is EB not even holding on, almost daring Joe to "pop a weegie" and dump him off the back. This is where our concerns actually started.
Well now full of adrenaline, EB decides to dance around the streetlight like a stripper. We broke out in an A cappella rendering of "I'm in love with a stripper" while EB made some cash from passers bye. The police were once again summoned. This was the second warning in under fifteen minutes. We were informed that next time, EB was going to be accompanying the officer to the jailhouse.
Joe figures that it may help if the bunny wore Joe's stunt jacket, "full of skid plates and such, it's really helpful if you wipe it while doing stunts." explains Joe. EB even talked Joe outta his pants for a minute. I think it's a good look for EB. However, EB is thinking that since he looks the part, he should be able to ride the part. Joe got his clothes back, he was tired of standing on Main Street in his undies.
Joe does offer EB a chance to sit on his bike. EB sits there, but like a young child, starts fidgeting almost immediately.
After much discussion, Joe shows what may have been the worst judgement I've seen in my lifetime. EB has been talking away, begging Joe to let him ride "your bike down the sidewalk, just once, it's soooo cool Joe!!" says EB.
Well, here we have it. EB is daring the police to come back by running out on the street and pulling a wheelie! Who knew that EB could really even ride, let alone "pop da weegie!". Look how he's squinting...he was really cooking along, a wheelie in third gear is quite impressive with the ladies however.
Here comes EB after running the length of the street. Up to his same old tricks, this time he's standing on the rear riders' pegs and pulls another wheelie!
Well we got EB off the bike, and after a fierce scolding from Joe, EB seems quite shaken up. He's pacing around on the street! We warned him that traffic was coming, but to no avail. EB was struck by this compact sized car.
Poor EB, here I stand taking pictures of him instead of helping out...
The man driving the car was beside himself with fear and concern. He's standing there shouting "Hey I love your work!"
The man then goes on to try to revive EB. He was doing some form of CPR that maybe he learned while overseas, it's not exactly what we would've tried, but he was so much bigger than the rest of us we kinda let him just go about it and try his best.
Thanks to a leak in the police department, we acquired this official photo of EB's accidental death scene. 'Tis a sad day here, as we've lost an adrenaline crazed friend.
But, this isn't the end of the story. The (rather giant) man who accidentally hit EB has been having strange dreams ever since the accident and has started to seek therapy. Apparently he's been having dreams that he's turning into EB and he's going on a killing spree at work.
