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7:56:26 AM Epiphany Warning: This is my first rant, and when I do things, I do them in spades. I had just spent all night writing, doing things, and basically thinking about how I had been feeling miserable for myself for the past week. Then I wrote this. I'll post the comments this one’s earned a little later, but until you get there, enjoy. You’re in store for something strange... |
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can feel it. I can really feel it. What is it, what is it? Power is what
it is. I can feel it flowing through my fingertips, flashing through my
mind, forcing every muscle in me to tense and tremble. There’s something
powerful in me, yes there is. I can see an entire universe pass through
me. I can see the people, the people I have forged from pieces of me, and
have created out of every important moment and aspect and memory of my
life. That is what they are. People call them voices in my head, they are
wrong. I have made them out of me, and they will stay here. I can feel
them, and their collective essence running through my veins, running with
my pulse. I can’t stop trembling now, it’s at times like these where I
feel like a god. I feel like I can do anything, fly, spin, twist, move
with every atom within my fantasy. It is my world, I can’t stop saying
that, It’s the little microcosm in my head, the one I can change with the
flick of a pen, the crack of the pencil, the click of the keyboard. If
I feel pain, they feel pain, if I rejoice, then they do the like, and vice
versa. I personify them, and they personify me. I could feel myself becoming
them from time to time. You have not felt an identity crisis until you
have felt what I have felt. And I could care less, because though I don’t
know who I might really be, I know that I am ME. They are me. They are
they. I am them. I go around in circles all day, not caring, not really
knowing, but feeling perfectly content most of the time. My friends do
not know how powerful what I have is. You do not either, until you have
felt it. They are not just parts of a story, not characters to be developed,
not people to be designed on a storyboard and thrown away like so much
trash. Fame is not something relevant when it comes to them. Accomplishing
is the merest point, but it is all I need, and all I really want. John
Sectier, Greyson Black, Janie Goodfellow, Rank Archer, Omega the Wicked,
Psycho Kay, Eno, the Four From the Gate, the Hidden Ones. All of them and
more sucked right out of my head and slapped onto paper or a computer screen.
They will always be a part of me, for the day I lose them is the day I
become lost, and disappear into the very depths of history, significant
as the rising of the sun each and every day or as unimportant as a single
speck of dust floating among the vast sea.
This is the whole of who I am. I am the spin doctor of ages, the storyteller by the campfire, the writer of legends that will be told of millennia from now. I am Enforcer. I am Observer. My name does not matter. I am me, and that is all you need to know, and it is all you will ever need to know. I can feel the power, like electricity between my wrists. I have the world inside of me, and I will not waste it. Now I must stop this trembling, for nothing is wrong, things have just been set right, and I will cry from the bell towers that I am...
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| Comments
and such:
...BATMAN! ~
Someone
Oh boy, just when
we get to know him, he goes insane...
~
Dana
~
StarmanDeluxe
"p0p!" ~
Pollo Loco/Deuce
~
Cap’n Lazarus
~
The Sinister Chris
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The C Force © 1996-2001 Matt Laskowski --- The R Force © 1995-2001 The R. Enforcer