Like most people there were some really rough times in my life, the death of my father is probably the one that impacted my life the most and with the most force...
You see I do not possess one memory of my father, I don't recall the sound of his voice, the safety and love in his hugs, nor can I hear his laughter. What I do have are a lifetime of stories, and a few photographs, and I would like to share them with you. This page is in memory of my father...

My parents were highschool sweethearts This is their wedding day, February 1961. My grandmother made mom's dress. Gretchen would arrive in September of 1961

Well it's obvious mom can't claim full responsibility for my sense of humor! This picture was taken at a Halloween party, the outfit was made for my mom, but you see who ended up wearing it! I have a twisted sense of humor, and somehow i know i came by it honestly.

My brother Jerry Jr was born January 1964, the above picture is of dad and Jerry in my maternal grandparents backyard, at this point I had to be on the way, although there is no date on the picture. I have a pic of dad sleeping with his newborn son, but, it has mysteriously disappeared from my refrigerator. Throughout my life I was told what a kind man my father was, he had a sparkle in his gorgeous dark eyes, and a spring in every step he took. One of my favorite stories about him concern his nasty, worn out, grass stained converse hightops, he loved them! And grandma hated them, she would throw them in the trash, even bury them and everytime, my father would dig them out again! I don't know why, but I love that story. November 15, 1965, I made my appearance into the world! How I got here is kind of comical, especially if you know my mom! When Gretchen and Jerry were trying to arrive, they took forever, and mom's labor would have to be induced, so when she went into labor for me, dad figured they had time, so he leaned up against the kitchen counter eating a donut and having a cup of coffee, while my laborous mother was on her knees cleaning his shoes and trying to convince him that I was coming, he laughed and said, "We have time." He was wrong, I came fast and furious, they barely made it in time. I am one of the few people who love their name and that is because it is the one thing I have that my dad gave me. My mom wanted to name me Ivy Leigh, but dad stepped in and said, "If we don't name her Valerie, then you can't take her home." It was his favorite name, and I like it too :)

Sometime after I was born, my parents would divorce, it was during the Viet Nam era, and the time came where my father was facing the draft. My mom feared he would go and loose his life, and agreed to sign over custody to my father to keep him from going to Viet Nam. My brother, sister and I would live with a friend of my paternal grandmother, while my father lived with grandma. He had a job in Lancaster, Ohio, and was taking some night classes. On November 20, 1967 on his way to his motel room after classes, dad was on a tricky road that was dusted with snow, he lost control and died of a broken neck at the age of twenty five.

The three of us, Easter after our father died.

My father died five days after my 2nd birthday, and I was far too young for memories. I used to pretend he was alive somewhere and would one day return for me, but that day never came. When I told Gretchen this a few years ago, she said, "Trust me, Val, he's dead...I saw him in his casket." She remembers everything, I remember nothing, and yet I don't know what would be more painful. Remembering him and loosing him, or loosing him and having no memories. My heart was broken for nearly all of my life, I couldn't let go of my father; but now, that I am growing in my relationship with Christ, I can at last put my beautiful, handsome father to rest. I still miss him, I still mourn him and I still cry for him, but, I now have the blessed hope of Jesus Christ, and I know we shall be together again! Praise God!
Someday
Dear Daddy,
I have spent most of my life mourning you, missing you, and aching for you
I just knew if you were alive my life would be so much different,
but fate would not allow it, and you left me before I really knew you.
I cannot count the times I cried for you, begged and pleaded that you weren't really dead
and that someday you would return and come for your little girl
That day never came, but, it will.....
You see there is a man named Jesus and a place called Heaven, and eternal life
And when I die and leave this old world, I will throw myself into Jesus's arms and then into yours
because next to Jesus, there is no one I long to meet more, you have my heart, daddy
and the time we've been apart will seem like nothing when we spend eternity together.

I love you, daddy,
Valerie Anne

 

   

   

  

Special thanks to Stephanie for making this memorial so beautiful, and for the love she put into the graphics for this set :)