The Checklist



It's a joke. I'll tell you that up front. But all of my friends bug me. They all have it out for me. And they all want to set me up with someone... I am picky--that I will readily admit--but my pickiness stems mostly from respect for myself, and I have to question "what is wrong with that?" So I tell my friends: "If he meets the requirements on the checklist, bring him on..." They know it is a joke. But they will also tell you I have never dated a guy who did not meet the criteria.




1. MUST BE MALE.
--Sorry girls, you just are not my type. Females can forget it, but alcoholics will not have their habits held against them...
2. MUST BE CHRISTIAN.
--I am stuck in my ways, you better be too. But, for all real purposes, one must know that I am fairly liberal in my Christian beliefs. I don't run around in a veil, and I show my ankles...
3. MUST HAVE BROWN EYES.
--There is one, and only one exception to this rule. And I've already learned my lesson with him. Well, that used to be the truth. I have found myself breaking this rule more and more for green and hazel eyes. My current victim of choice? They're blue.
4. MUST BE A SPORTS FAN.
--I know most guys are, but you would not believe the guys I've dated that cannot understand why I want don't want to go dancing--The Braves are on. But heck yeah, take me out after the game...
5. MUST MEET AT LEAST ONE OF THE FOLLOWING: a) have a great voice, b) look great in leather pants, or c) wear sandals without socks
--I actually find a) the most attractive, but I guess (in my usual sarcastic tone) I can't be too picky....