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Thursday, June 23, 2005
once again...
Mood:  blue
Now Playing: PAID IN FULL - Eric B. & Rakim

.. im thinking of him. i cant get him out of my head. i hate him for that fact that hes still with that stupid fucking girl. hes the only one my heart yearns for. hes the only that i want.. the only one that still makes me breathless.

whenever hes around i cant help but look for him. i cant help but get his attention. ARGH.

yeah... and now my moms in the hospital. dont know whats wrong with her. doctors dont even know. she took like a billion different tests and what not. just feel soo helpless. i wish i can do something. aaaaaand this all happened yesterday. 6/22 nice timing no? shit is so gay. whatever. im out.

Posted by beautiful disaster at 11:33 AM EDT
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Thursday, June 2, 2005

Mood:  not sure
Now Playing: Mariah Carey feat. Twista - One & Only (remix)

its funny how that song is playing because its about looking for your "one & only", it makes me sad sometimes because i've been missing someone to talk to at night. i miss missing someone. i miss the hugs. i miss the kisses on the foreheads. i miss someone missing me. BLAH. i just feel lonely and abandoned.

i've been emotionally scarred since michael. cant trust nobody, cant open up like i can to anybody. and its all because im too scared to get hurt again. sigh. whatever. i'ma end this now. getting a lil too personal.

Posted by beautiful disaster at 4:12 PM EDT
Updated: Thursday, June 2, 2005 4:18 PM EDT
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