updated wed. 28 of Sept, 2005:
well, here we are, its the new school year. started this in grade nine and here i am in grade 12. i can't believe how hard it is to live in a world full of so much hope and dreams, full of so much opportunity. When i was in grade 9, i was friend's with this girl Lani. we hung out, did girlie stuff like shop and corn rows. Back then i didn't know it, but all she needed was someone to be there. Something happened, summer started and i had my karate, constantly training. we lost track and went our seperate ways. Then i found out she stabbed some chick, i didn't know what was going on, but i didn't care enough to call. She moved away and came back. i talked to her a couple times then for an entire year she was gone. This summer we started talking again. She asked to chill but i was too self involved, didn't see she was actually asking for help. I denied and denied, told her id give her a call when i was available. A couple days before the 28th i did, i said to come down here and chill, bring some caps, it'll be fun. she asked me to come up there but i said no, it was too far. On the twenty eighth i sent her a msg over nexus, which she made after i asked if she had it. I invited her to a party. i guess she missed that message because three days later i found out she had hung herself. Even so, i didn't believe. I called her cell at 1am when i found out, her bf picked up and mumbled something. I just figured she was fine. It took to days to realize she was actually gone. I'm sorry lani, i wasn't there. no one was. Your life ended a long time ago, i'm just sorry you had to go through it alone. I didn't see the signs, now i look back and it was so obvious. You were the hardest cover on the shelf and i walked by too fast to see. Rest in Peace i love you and i'm sorry.
This is a new school year. I've fucked up enough, experienced enough, learned and grew up a lot this past year. Now it's my turn to follow my words and get back on track. I took a side cut. I fell and scraped my knees, but now it's time to get back up, because i was never one to fall and stay down. Perserverance is key, because even the best have failed. If you haven't experienced failure, then you how are you supposed to learn from it?
-kelsey corbett
-mar 18 88
-surrey, bc
-sullivan heights
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the only quote u'll ever need to hear:
"Life isn't life and death isn't death, but added together they are an eternal illusion of light and dark, an endless circle.
You are the only one living your life. You control the direction you head, the decisions you make, the darkness you reveal, the light you shade. Remember that, in the end, shit is nothing more than gold and chances will always be given but it's up to you to prove it to yourself."
here's eddie's question to tha world...
