9^th grade year had just started at J.F.K High School and Sean Roberts was already hanging with the popular 12^th graders. No freshman was given this privileged, at least not in the beginning of the year. Sean had grown up and still lived in the projects not to far from J.F.K High.

“What you say nigga?” a voice came from out the crowd said.

“The gurl was all ova a nigga. Man, if I tried it wouldn’t have helped,” Sean said.

“So what you do?” another voice said. Others looked to have wanted to ask too. 

“Hey, I’m a gentleman what ‘you’ think I did…” At Sean’s words a few guys sighed. “I let her do what she wanted and that was everything. Woo.” The laughter filled the side of the lunchroom they regularly sat at. The haters upped their noses and wannabes just reveled. They stopped when they saw a group of girls, who didn’t not looking amused, staring at them.

“Where De ya’ll?” someone asked. De, a.k.a. Derrick Johnson, was the leader of the pack. He took Sean under his wing when Sean couldn’t fit in cause he was short, ambitious, and young.

“He’s handling some business.” Sean said. De was a 20-year-old senior at J.F.K., who dealt drugs and got his way no matter what. Sean looked up to De, but couldn’t see getting thrown in jail or even getting killed an option. He knew that would kill his mom, a hard working 45 something Tonya Downs. So he boosted merchandise that “fell off trucks” and things that didn’t make it to stores from warehouses and ships. Just anything to make money, he didn’t want to live off his mother.

“Like you know anything about that.” A joking Jeremy Santiago said. Besides for Sean, he was De’s right hand man.

“Hey, I handles mine just like I did wit Camilla last night,” Sean said with a satisfying look. A few guys gave an “Ooh” at the comment.  Jeremy just smiled with approval at Sean’s miss use of women.

Sean had been eating a burger. When he realized his tray was baron and stomach still craving food, he went to the nearest table filled with women to beg for food. “Ladies, anybody got some food to help out a starving nice young man like himself,” was one of the many lines he used. Using his charm he was able to quench his hungry with time to still hang with his boys before he had to get to class.

“Dawg, oh Sara just gave you all her food. Like we can’t see she hungry,” mocked Jeremy. Sean had also squander some food from some other girls including his sister Kim, but he didn’t want to admit that.

“He learnt from the best,” called out De, who had returned by now. “I taught him well,” De paused. “Right?”

“Sho nuf this nigga been like a father type to me. All my life,” Sean said answering De’s question. Sean’s father had been killed when he was 5 years old. Leaving his mother to raise him by herself.

“No matter what I’ll be there for you. To advise or consol you, boy,” De directed to Sean.

A bell rang and everyone left the lunchroom. “Where you gotta go next son?” questioned De.

“Catch up on them math skills ol’ man,” referring to his father comment before, Sean went on “An this gurl name Rita who sit next to me,” Sean playfully said to De as they proceeded out the lunchroom. They parted ways, and Sean headed on to class. When he got there he had to make a few re-arrangements to the sits and took his place next to Rita. 

Mr. Taylor was sitting at his desk. His attire consisted of some black slacks with a plaid, long sleeve shirt. He grew up in this neighborhood just like the kids he taught. He was a young man. So it wasn’t to long ago he was in the same spot as these kids. He wasn’t going to take their crap or no smart attitudes. After the bell rung he began, “take out the homework I assigned to you last night. If you didn’t do it you won’t be ready for the quiz we have today.” Moans filled the room. “What, no ones ready. People you should know this stuff. We go through this everyday. Too bad.”

“Yo, Mr. T I did my work,” spoke a male voice from the back of the room. His classmates didn’t all seem that eager.  Someone bellowed out, “I’m sayin’ dawg don’t know body care.”

“Give my man some credit. Thank you. Lets get to work. You know what ‘I’m sayin’ dawg’,” mocked Mr. Taylor towards the area the young man sat in. Mr. Taylor past out the quizzes. He gave the class 15 minutes to finish and when they were done they should review.

Sean was finished with a few minutes to spare. He got out a small notepad and began to write. He made sure Mr. Taylor wasn’t looking and passed the note to Rita. Before she got a chance to read it, Mr. Taylor casual stopped between Sean’s desk and Rita’s desk to read the note. The note read: Gurl U cute. Holla Back! . Sean being embarrassed just put his hand up to conceal his face.

“Mr. Roberts, you think Ms. Alvarez here is a nice looking young lady,” Mr. Taylor questioned Sean poignantly.

Sean didn’t want to answer, but used the situation to his advantage. He turned to Rita took her hand in his and answer with a “yeah”.  He made her blush and giggle which his intentions were to do. His suave style interrupted when Mr. Taylor continued with his questions.

“What’s attractive to you about her,” questioned Mr. Taylor.

“You read da note. She cute,” Sean said looking deep in Rita’s eyes now.

“My bad Mr. Roberts. I meant to say, what do you find attractive about well all women,” still curious Mr. Taylor went on “what is a major turn on to you?”   

“Mr. T myself, personally I like a good smile on a cute face,” Sean said while laughter emitted from the class. By now Sean had let go of Rita and was face front in his desk. His attention was giving totally to Mr. Taylor now. “No, most men like butts and breasts. I’m not picky I just need a cute honey with a nice grill. You know ear to ear with it.” Sean smiled he felt confident in his answer.

“Just a smile. Come on. No special features or distinction you want on ya woman,” Mr. Taylor said criticizing as well as doubting Sean’s answer.

“Well you know a nice waist with some curves to the side wouldn’t hurt. The perfect place to put your hands, a resting spot,” Sean said also use hand motions to indicate his point. Mr. Taylor pointed out to the class he meant he liked wide hips. Sean looked at the clock and said “shouldn’t we be talking about math.”

Mr. Taylor said, “in math we deal with curves. So to legitimize this conversation what shape would be best to describe this waist Mr. Roberts likes? Anyone.” No one wanted to answer him so he decided to call on people. “Mr. Givens.” He didn’t answer. “Let’s see. Ms. Santiago. What should we use?”

In a not caring way Kim answered, “An arc. I don’t know.” Mr. Taylor went to the board to draw an arc.

“No you got to include the natural in-depth definition of the waist to hip combo,” Sean said forcefully.

“Then what do you suggest we use to illustrate your fantasy,” joked Mr. Taylor. The class laughed at Sean’s frustration and embarrassment.

“Two parabola things intersecting each other upside down,” Sean tried to explain.

“Hyperbola running along the y-axis” explained Mr. Taylor as he drew an example on the board next to the arc.

“Thank you. That explains what I’m talking about betta than ‘an arc, like ol’ girl said,” Sean mocked.

“It’s not a geometric shape, but it will do.”

“See Mr. T you put your hand right there.” Sean pointed at the board from his seat. “Look at that smile too. Mr. T you talking satisfaction in the palm of your hand.” Sean looked at his hand as if it were missing something while saying under his breath, “man”.

“Mr. Roberts, if that’s all you want from life, you don’t ask for much.” The class’ laugh along with Mr. Taylor’s words made Sean feel incomplete.

“I rather have a big ass in my hands,” a male voice yelled out. The laughter intensified. Sean just wanted to change the topic.

“Mr. Roberts,” drawing Sean’s attention back to Mr. Taylor. “Have you ever touched this perfect waist before? Saw any girl with ‘it’?”

“Hey, if it’s out there, I’ll find ‘it’. If she got ‘it’, I can tell you,” Sean said with a smile.

“Mr. Roberts you don’t seem to have a fan club going,” Mr. Taylor indicated the girls who didn’t appreciate Sean’s comment and showed they didn’t.

“Some of them haters don’t got ‘it’ an’ know they don’t got ‘it’. Some do,” Sean suavely said. He had his eye on a few of these girls and didn’t want to make them mad.

“Enlighten us Mr. Roberts,” Mr. Taylor said as he notice class was almost over.

“Well Gloria to thin to have anything,” Sean implied a dislike for her. “Oh” filled the room as Gloria turned her head away from Sean. “Chic in the front a lil’ too thick. Your hand might get stuck between a roll or somethin’,” Sean joked. This girl was a friend of his. Mr. Taylor didn’t look too happy and was going to stop this when Sean continued, “but girl, on the left, up front,” Sean pointed out Kim. “Mr. T, I seen her at lunch today, she aight.” 

“Ladies, I’m sorry for my male counterpart’s stupidity and lack of knowledge in the female department. We’ll work on him,” Mr. Taylor yelled the last part as the bell rang. Mr. Taylor gave out the homework assignment, and everyone was dismissed. 

After class, Sean didn’t talk to any one not even Rita. He just looked for De, but he had “dipped out” someone told him. He could catch De later, but he wanted to talk to somebody now. So Sean went to class and finished his day at school.

Sean didn’t feel like riding the bus, afraid he might see some one from Mr. Taylor’s class. De wasn’t there to give him a ride home. So he walked home. He stopped and talked to people, he does usual business with, telling them he’d have some “new stuff” in soon. His mom didn’t get home until 6:00 p.m. so he went to K.F.C. to get them dinner for when she got home.

Sean called De. He wanted to know why De left school early. He dialed up De’s cell as he thought, “He probably wouldn’t be home”. But he didn’t answer. “Doin’ business as usual. He always thinkin’ ‘bout that paper,” Sean convinced himself before leaving a message. He didn’t want to assume anything was wrong.

Sean fooled around until his mom got home. When she got home, they ate and both talked about both their days. Sean even told his mom about what happened in Mr. Taylor’s class.

“Don’t worry yourself about it,” mom comfortingly said. “He just wanted to make an example of someone. You just had to be it, but if you want I’ll talk to him about it. You don’t use my baby. Dat man don’t want me to come up to dat school.”

Mom always had a way of making the truth come out and consol you at the same time. “No mom I’ll handle it,” Sean said knowing how his mom is.

“All right, but just let me know. Cause I’ll show out on the man in ways he never thought possible,” mom angrily reassured.

“I know where to find you,” Sean joked. “Thanks ma. I love you.”

“I love you too. Now get yo momma some more food,” mom said while handing Sean her plate. “Take my cup too. I’m thirsty,” mom pointed to her cup.

Sean would do anything for his mom. Even take her large request of food and special needs as she called it out. He owed everything to her. Whenever he got merchandise to sale, she got first picks of whatever she wanted. He always gave her money no matter the situation. If she needed she would have it. He loved his mother, he couldn’t see disappointing her in anyway.

Sean’s mom went to bed and he fell asleep watching TV. The phone woke him up. It was De. At least he knew nothing had happened to him.

“Wuz up nigga,” De said excited.

“Yeah man. Why you rolled out today? Did something go down,” Sean questioned.

“Naw, I’m fine. Can’t nuthin’ happen to me,” De said unsurely. “Teresa wanted to learn some ‘things’ outside of class teachings. U know,” smoothly spoke De.

“I feel you. Just was wondering where you could’ve gone that’s all,” worried Sean.

“Come on son. You know me.” They both laughed. De finished with, “how moms donin’?”

“She fine. Just tired. Wish I could take care of both of us. I’m tired of her bein’ drowned out after one day of work,” angrily said Sean.

“One day you can man. One day. But She needs you now. I won’t let you mess that up. Ok. Do what you do and it will all work out. Ok. ” Sean could hear someone was with De.    

“Aight. Teresa still need to get her ‘brains’” Sean said.

“No. She schooled and gone. I’m holdin’ evenin’ school lil’ nigga,” scolded De.

“Oh. You an around the clock educator,” Sean respectfully said.

“I’m sorry man. No this hoe named Wanda, I’m workin’ on, over here. She a joke, you know,” remarked De. “You workin on yours, right.”

“What? Joke? I don’t get it,” baffled Sean.

“The big one. The hoe you play and leave wanting more.” Sean couldn’t believe what De was saying. “You ain’t got one lined up yet,” asked De.

“No. I wasn’t aware I need to,” Sean stated.

“Every year the boys and I embarrass some hoe. I didn’t tell you about that,” De observed. “Well we’ll talk about it tomorrow. The boys and me will tell you more about it. Them the memories. ‘Play ‘em and leave ‘em like you never needed ‘em’. In some cases ‘never know ‘em’. Damn. Your lil’ slick talkin’ ass would be good at it too.”

“Cause I learned from the best. Right,” Sean proudly commented.            

“ That’s right,” De said. They said their goodbyes and Sean went to bed.

When Sean got to school he started scooping out girls. Fine to ugly girls, smart to dumb girls, thin to fat girls, they were all “potential candidates” to be played. De would have to advise him of the best choice. Wait a minute! He was acting like this was a game. He could see a one-night stand but not playing with a girl’s emotions. He wouldn’t want anyone to dog his mom out like that. He would kill anyone that tried him or his mom.

Lunch came around and De wasn’t at their normal place at the table. Sean went to look for him. He was going up the stairs headed for the third floor when he heard yelling. It sounded like De. So he checked it out.

De, standing 2 feet from Jeremy, looked like he was going to hit him. De shouted, “how you gonna let some bitch stand in the way we work things?”  De backed up when he realized he was to close to Jeremy.

“She my girlfriend. I love her,” Jeremy defended. He looked very emotional.

“Bull shit.” De waved off Jeremy. “Bitches come and go I’ll always be your boy. Down, no matter what.”

“Nigga, grindin’, fuckin’ and frontin’ is yo deal not mine. All right maybe it was,” Jeremy pointed out. “…But not now. ”

“Come on. My nigga the same nigga who was there for me since we started this shit,” De pleaded. They had been going to school together since the 7^th grade. “You been the same for 4 years, and some hoe… some bitch just change yo ass over night. No, I don’t believe this shit.” De throws up his arms in disbelief.

“Please don’t call Elaine no bitch or no hoe,” Jeremy asked. “I’m still the same. I just matured a little. I want to get a job, I want to go to college, I want to get married one day, and I want to be able to look myself in the mirror everyday without thinkin’ I went wrong somewhere when I could have changed it. De, you can change too,” Jeremy declared.

De didn’t want to hear what he had to say. De commented, “Me change? Nigga, there’s people out there now wanting to be me. Wishin’ they fuckin’ knew my ass.”

“What, like Sean?”

“What you say nigga? You my dawg. My number one nigga. We boys. Homies. Sean…” De stuttered.

“It looks like you gonna take that boy down with yo ass. He will hate you for it too. No education and no future. You going to leave him that way,” Jeremy interrupted.

“Sean. I am damn good to that boy. Talk about him and I’ll kill you myself,” De angrily said. He was in Jeremy’s face now and was serious. His hand was on his back pocket where he kept his 9mm. “I’ll do anything for him. He’s going to make something of himself,” De said proudly.

“You can too. Just don’t fuck it up,” Jeremy begged as he walked away.

De saw Sean as he went for the stairs. “Heard that,” De asked with something in his throat. “Oh course you did. But whatever happens I always got you, son.”

“Yeah,” Sean squeaked out. He couldn’t let De down now. Not after he had lost his best friend.

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