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Midget Story 1

George Brush Help! HELP! Shrieked a woman’s voice. Leonardo Divinci called back “help is on it’s way!” and it was. Divinci got there and saw a woman trapped on an island in the middle of a flash flood rushing through the streets of Italy. Leonardo took action. He sat down with his notepad and designed the perfect flotation device to go into the middle of the flood and bring her back. Next he designed to containers that would hold air that he could strap to his feet and walk on the water with so he would ensure her safe return. Last he designed an aircraft that he could fly over the water so he could save her without Ruining his brand new clothes. He took a huge breath. Leonardo looked over and gasped to see George Brush with a beautiful dame on his side. She looked at Divinci and said, “You had a bunch of great ideas but you didn’t make any of them!” “Yeah that’s why he’s my sidekick,” Piped George Brush. Then he said with a gleeful grin, “I didn’t know I could swim, but seeing as how I’m a midget renaissance man I should have known I could do anything.” “You’re my hero!” said Chipper, the beautiful dame George saved. “What could I do to ever repay you?” Leonardo said, “ I know a couple of things!” George said “ Hey Leonardo go design a gutter so you can get your mind out of it!” Then he laughed and added making Jokes to the list of things he could do. He then told Chipper that her gratitude was enough to thank him, and he was off taking his trusty sidekick with him. They walked back home because Leonardo hadn’t built the automobile he designed yet and on the way Leonard chirrped “Congrats on another job well done!” “Thank you my good man.” Said George Brush. Then he wondered out loud, “Maybe I should write a book about it or I could paint a picture or even better yet I could write a book and paint pictures to illustrate it.” “Could you do all that?” asked Leonardo a little bit stunned. “What do you think I am normal?” asked George Brush a little annoyed. Then he angrily added “I am a midget renaissance man, I can do anything. There is nothing that I cannot do. I speak eight different languages, I read, I write, I paint, I draw, among other things and oh yeah I can swim and be a comedian!” “And give a good tongue lashing to your well intended sidekick too.” Leonardo said half scared and half shy. “Sorry I am just a little tired and a…” but Leonardo interrupted with a warning “Watch out!” “Shut up I said!” yelled George Brush right before he walked into a pull that was perfectly placed to get him in the younodes. He instantly curled up into the fetil position and stayed that way for ten seconds and then got up and brushed himself off. “That didn’t feel great.” He said. “I bet!” was the reply of Divinci. He then added “I think it was a trap George and by the way your recovery was amazingly quick! Does that have to do with you being a midget renaissance man?” “Yes, but don’t call me a midget.” He said. “Well, actually do,” he changed his mind. “OK!” replied Divinci. “Back to the pole, why do you think that it was a trap?” asked George Brush. “This here note” answered Leonardo. “What does it say?” Interrogated Brush. “It says ‘yes George Brush this was intended to hit you.’” Was Divinci’s reply. “Well boy howdy, I guess it was a trap!” said George Brush. He then added “Leonardo, you and I have some getting’ even to do. What do you say?” “I agree with you my man!” Leonardo said excitedly. “Well, lets take this back to our lab and run some tests.” Suggested Brush. “Can we wait tell the morning? I am very tired.” Asked Leonardo. “Wuss!” Taunted Brush. “Look not everyone is as strong as a midget.” Complained Divinci. “Oh Yeah I forgot.” Laughed Brush. The next morning came and our two Renaissance heroes were working the tails

Midget Story 2

This is the story of Increda-Midget. It is a rarely known story, but that doesn’t make Increda-Midget any less of a hero. The story starts in the late 1950’s when two young parents in New York City were lucky enough to bare a midget child. Little did they know that this child would contain powers greater than any other midget ever born. Increda-Midget performed his first heroic act when he was still just a lad. A building was on fire in Chicago and Increda-Midget jumped there all the way from New York just so he could save a goldfish named Sparky. Some people did not think that this heroic feat was a big deal because all he had done was save a little girl’s pet goldfish. However, two very important things happened that day. Increda-Midget was discovered as a mutant midget with special powers beyond that of a wizard and his parents made him a neat little Spandex jumpsuit with I-M embroidered on the chest. From that point on Increda-Midget dedicated his life to doing the little heroic things that Superman, Batman, Spiderman, and the incredible Hulk thought they were to big and powerful to do. He was the little scrappy one who did what he had to do and then left before he could be awarded for his heroic acts. If you told him that he was a hero he would say that he has done nothing to deserve being called that. He wouldn’t save children, because that was Superman’s job. He did however fight crime. No one ever loitered at the local gas station when Increda-Midget was around, and if you J walked Increda-Midget was there to bust you. People began to think that Increda-Midget midget was a nuisance, they said he wasn’t a true super hero and called him the Misdemeanor Buster. Increda-Midget didn’t mind though he always told himself and others, “Without people doing the little deeds, the big deeds would just be normal deeds!” Eventually Increda-Midget became the “blue collar” hero. In fact he was awarded the Honorary Blue Collar The Janitors and the street sweeps looked up to him as the one blue collar who could show the Rich people that small people matter. Increda-Midget soon got his chance to prove himself to be a great hero. It was during the cold war, and all the other heroes were sick. The President was in a jam so he called Increda-Midget to come help him. Increda-Midget was supposed to go to Cuba and disarm all the soviet death missiles. It was too late though because they had all been secretly fired before Increda-Midget could go and disarm them. Increda-Midget left to go to Cuba and on his way there he saw a pack of nuclear missiles headed for the US. He being the hero and all figured it was his responsibility to save the US. So he huffed and he puffed and he blew a mighty blow upon the missiles but they didn’t stop coming so he tried to tell them to stop but everyone knows missiles don’t listen to midgets. Increda-Midget decided there was only one thing he could do. He threw his body against the missiles. After the great explosion and all the dust had settled Increda-Midget’s dead body was found and buried before anyone knew what had happened. Increda-Midget had met his end, but he saved the country he loved. And his grave was decorated with a medal from the President for his heroic acts. Unfortunately Increda-Midget was not able to save himself too. Increda-Midget was a true unsung hero. The things he did brought admiration to the eyes of many small people. They even tried to name a holiday after him but it created a major uproar when all the Christians found out that Christmas had been changed to Increda-Midget day. Since he didn’t get a holiday people just forgot about him. So next time you are celebrating Christmas be sure to thank Increda-Midget.
by David Lay