Past Sports from the
Past sports article for the week of 11/30/06
Turkey Bowling 2006
By, Grey Sports
As Thanksgiving closes and Christmas approaches the World Championship
Turkey Bowling contests begin.
This year promises to be something special as other nations hold the United
States and Canada to the “World” part of the event title and force the
inclusion of other states in the event.
This should be interesting.
Long criticised for the use of the global appellation Canada and the US
have long stated that it may as well be a world championship considering
that theirs are the two primary turkey-consuming countries in the world,
and thus the only nations with any great degree of turkey bowling experience.
Nevertheless Europe, Asia and several African nations have sent representatives
to the contests, citing the proliferation of Subway sandwich outlets and
an increased preference for their turkey subs as reason enough to compete.
The serious competition is a four way brawl between Seattle based Turkey
Punchers, Ottawa team Dave’s All Star Gravy Train, Boston heroes Fowl
Pluckers and surprise outsiders The Flying Turkeys from Vancouver, a line
up that once again proves that most of the best turkey bowling happens
along the border.
While the Turkey Punchers and Fowl Pluckers show consistent good performance
The Flying Turkeys have shown stunning, if spasmodic, talent when the
pressure is on, frequently managing strikes or even taking down seven-ten
splits with careful bird handling.
Naturally with so many inexperienced teaks performing this year the blooper
reels are expected to be the true highlight.
France and Britain are expected to offer a modicum of competition, though
the tendency to use fresh turkey has had interesting splatter results.
Without specific rules regarding the state of the turkey most of Europe
has assumed that fresh was best, whereas the Korean and Japanese teams
have taken the time to hire Canadian consultants, and thus use frozen
If the Asian teams have any particular problems it’s to do with the irregular
weight distribution. American teams have long known how to tailor their
throws in an almost intuitive manner that for some reason no other culture
has managed to master.
There are some countries that merit serious consideration in the future.
Rumour has it that Mexico may get involved next year, having less turkey
experience than the US and Canada, though not much that it would make
much of a difference.
Australia and New Zealand in particular have gained much kudos for the
amount of enthusiasm they are displaying, even while skill eludes them.
Much of it is based upon the shared attitude that they must excel in all
sporting endeavours, however foreign.
Most North American coaches believe that one or two teams of credible,
possibly even formidable skill could come from these countries in the
next five years.
For now it’s just fun to see them marvel at the size of turkeys when they’re
used to chickens and wondering where they’re supposed to put their fingers.
In the meantime Vegas is favouring the Canadian teams to win, continuing
the trend of the last three years, with some predicting a strong showing
from the Seattle group and the distinct possibility of an international