Past Opinion Articles
Article for the week of 2/27/06
Whereís My Stinking Hovercar?
By, Grey Science
Here we are in 2006, what is coming to be known as half past the dawn
on the new millennium, and everyone is wondering where the future is.
Well, not the future exactly, since that is always in existence ahead
of us as we are permanently in the present with the past ever behind us.
This is why I donít get to write much.
Public opinion of late has been very bitter towards the range of technological
products presently available to the public. While game consoles and flat
screen TVs have proven popular most people do not see this as nearly enough.
This, they say, is the Twenty First Century, long sold as the time of
all sorts of futuristic inventions, mostly powered by atomic energy and
featuring all sorts of wild moving parts.
While atomic energy is somewhat available it is not nearly clean enough,
and tends to produce the sorts of things put in garbage cans that no one
wants left on their curb.
What everyone really wants to see is flying cars, robot servants making
our lives easier, moon bases, futuristic foods of exotic flavour and texture
reduced to easy to swallow pills.
What everyone gets is excuses.
Letís take a look at these four products, which were supposed to be generally
available by now.
Flying cars require a power plant with a thrust to mass ratio that is
not easy or inexpensive to produce. Additionally traffic laws would have
to make light speed advances in order to keep up. Rescue services would
have to be totally revamped to handle more midair collisions. Road Rage
advocates would need to add surface to air missiles to their handy arsenal,
causing small and medium arms prices to soar.
Robot servants are nearly here, if only they were not so aware of things
like rights, pay or world domination.
Moon bases are tricky, it all depends on what you believe. If you believe
the press releases from organisations like NASA, the Scientologists and
Madam Fuís House of Infinite Muffins then there are no moon bases because
it is economically unfeasible. Establishing and maintaining a moon base
would require too much for too little gain. There is nothing on the moon
that cannot be had or replicated on Earth. Honest.
If you believe the likes of Grey Xphile there are bases up there exploiting
all sorts of minerals, resources and native beings.
Proving that is one thing, stopping it quite another.
Foods are becoming increasingly exotic and futuristic, with many edible
products containing less than ten percent by weight items that have been
waved in the general direction of something that would qualify as natural
Reducing these and other items to pill form is taking some time. Explanations
range from lack of present technical know how, to the inability to turn
an entire cow into a pill.
Excuses range from obesity issues that will have to be resolved before
consuming great amounts of food is made any easier to the notion that
Pizza Hut wonít survive the transition with the loss of the traditional
shape of itís product.
None of this is satisfying to the public at large, still demanding flying
transport, banquets that fit in the palm of their hands, automatons that
can do everything for them and much, much more to make sure they donít
have to get off of a nice, comfortable chair.