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Last week's News

News article for the week of 9/7/09.

Apple Sony Alliance Battles Amazon
By, Grey Business

As a new generation of e-books brings the idea of reading an entirely library while on the toilet closer than ever three giants are preparing to face off.
Amazon, the great white internet sales outlet, seems to have the drop on everyone with new technology and access.
However Apple, the pimp shaded music pusher has shown great awareness in online sales, and the ability to make deals by allying with Sony, the crotchety old bastard of media selling who will deliberately try to stop anything new because it means they have to get up, while simultaneously owning 60% of all the world’s copyrights.
The alliance between Apple and Sony is far from rock solid. Sony is still trying to convince Apple to convert its iTunes property into something more familiar to traditional musical marketing, in other words taking out this electronic stuff and putting it on some overpriced medium that can make even more money.
There are also claims that Apple has its share of doubts, mostly centred around Sony’s inability to move with the times. Some say that most Apple employees are somewhat disgusted with the Sony notion that they can take out Amazon by clubbing it over the head and dragging it back to their cave.
All the same Sony is polishing its clubs and fortifying it’s caves and Apple continues to push the boundaries of acceptable entertainment science.
Amazon too is preparing for the final confrontation.
Unafraid of copyrights or stealing old ideas Amazon is amassing an army to rush through the Arden and conquer France.
This is considered a useless gesture as no one starts anything important by conquering France these days.
Add to that the whimpering French complaint that they had almost found their spine and it looks like the battles will not go to Amazon.
Nevertheless the premier online retailer may be perfectly placed to win the long war. A trusted brand name with a reputation for prompt delivery the e-book battlefield may be exactly Amazon’s arena.
While Apple would similarly have little trouble adapting to the new media Sony has shown itself to be a slow learner, with most of its managers only now figuring out that “e-book” was not a new category of book like “cookbook” or “coffee table book”.
And yet history has shown that there is great power in the ability to mindlessly smash through stuff, heedless of consequence or criticism, so it may be the case that the alliance is deceptively powerful.
Of course, to even the odds all Amazon has to do is ally with Microsoft and then it will be unstoppable. Thankfully Amazon likes its soul too much to do such a thing.
Bollywood Marvel Disney Broadcast

By Grey News (As featured on the RPP Video Update)

With the announcement that the Disney Corporation has brought all rights and likenesses to Marvel comic book characters the entertainment world has been put into a spin.
Bollywood, the all singing, all dancing, all South East Asian version of Hollywood, has been caught flatfooted in the middle of an original production combining the origins of Wolverine and Scrooge McDuck.
The unnamed film would have starred an animated Scrooge, Lorenzo Lamas as Wolverine, Minnie Mouse as the conflicted love interest of the two, and adamantium coins to even the battle/dance scene.
With this merging Disney is now planning its own version of the film and is threatening to sue Bollywood companies off the subcontinent if they even dare to try the same thing.
Bollywood has responded by replacing Minnie Mouse with Goofy, and turning the plot towards a serious romance.

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