Last week's News

News article for the week of 8/21/05.

The Search For Atlantis Ep. 4: So we Started (continued from ep. 3)
By, Grey Exploration

Our search for Atlantis is finally beginning to focus on searching for Atlantis rather than attending Geekfests and attempting to pick up attractive members of the appropriate sex. That should be good news as theoretically it gives me the chance to tell tales about exotic locations, about the places we see, the ancient history and generally explore the myths and tall tales around that great lost city.
The truth is so much more disappointing.
Our benefactor, presently named Warbucks, is providing us with more than enough funding to get the job done, there is absolutely nothing I can complain about in terms of finances.
Leadership is what we lack.
So far the characters that have named themselves Kirk, The Captain and Batman are vying for the title while doing nothing to live up to the role.
Warbucks, Fox and Hawk are just sitting back waiting for results, as one is the financier, another is an expert at time dating techniques and Hawk is basically the cook who knows a lot about various Atlantis related fictions.
Note that I said vying for the title, there isn’t a single person here aside from myself who actually shows leadership skills, and mine are oriented around telling everyone to shut up and pay the toll so we can get out of the country.
Which is another problem.
The search is also going badly because we’ve pissed off a few countries.
Naturally the Mediterranean is being searched, the whole of it, though Libya is upset that we are not about to search their interior. They stop short of calling it a conspiracy against an African nation, though do thing it is a Western plot of some sort.
Similarly portions along the Eastern coast of North America are being considered, as is Central America on one of Batman’s wild hunches. Even Greenland and Iceland are potential exploration spots, should we manage to see them.
However this has left the nations of South America feeling piqued. Throw in the fact that most of the Pacific Rim is being ignored and you have a situation where the less developed nations believe that this is another egotistical round of Europe and the USA trying to prove their superiority by proving a myth.
Ordinarily we might be able to ignore this childishness. After all, China, Japan, Chile and Botswana do not truly mind, China is more interested in extolling it’s own ancient virtues and Chile is quite happy with it’s reputation for containing the fewest Starbucks in the world.
Unfortunately we’re not following the evidence as much as we should. What we are following is the whims of a group of nerds, who are trying to live an eternal Star Trek convention.
In all fairness we recently spent a month combing through ancient Mexican artifacts, several of which depict floods or tsunamis washing over cities. Not solid evidence but an interesting coincidence that they appear to be as old as some stonework found in Spain that seems to describe the same scenes.
Unfortunately this month in Mexico coincided with the Mexico City Star Trek Convention, George Takei’s day trip to Tijuana and the Grand Central American Week of Mourning for James Doohan.
Join us again soon for the various pet theories held by our “experts” and why exactly I will shoot each and every last one of them if we get thrown out of another country for being too geeky.