Past Entertainment Articles.
Article for the week of 7/17/07
Dateline Hollywood, California….
The blonde hell spawn's campaign
People who thought Paris Hilton could never have a shot at the presidency have recently gained an enormous amount of things to worry about. After the latest poll, it seems she has gained even more support, especially in the uneducated females group, thereby stealing a large portion of potential votes from people who shall remain unnamed.
Even more frightening is the group of analysts that says that Paris has no real political background, and has never really done anything, wondering just what this “Let's save the Entertainers thing” would do that was so great. This was only an issue until they realized that a lot of former presidents had no idea what they were doing either, some of them even sharing Paris, shall we say, knack for being really stupid. And just like those people, she seems very serious about this matter.
The “No Family Left Behind” thing, coincidentally, sounds like a good idea according to everyone but the Republicans who claim it is just one step closer to communism, which, along with a bunch of other programs, most of which make sense, would lead to the inevitable fall of America into the depths of Hell, joining countries such as the old Soviet union.
Comparing ms. Hilton to Stalin has not yet had the desired effect, however, as most people simply do not know who Stalin was. They do know that communism is bad though, the TV tells them so.
Of course, the second after that, TV uses a considerably more recognizable face, such as that of Alec Baldwin, or sometimes Paris Hilton herself, to tell them that Paris Hilton is good for you. Quite simply, the masses do not know what to believe, except those who like the colour pink. But then again, that is hardly surprising.
Either way, it seems that no amount of trash-talking will bring Hilton down, and she is looking to be a stronger and stronger candidate each week!
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