~ Baby's black balloon makes her fly-
I almost fell into that hole in your life-
And you're not thinking about tomorrow-
'Cause you were the same as me-
But on your knees ~
*Chris*
I wish I had never wanted to party that night.
I wish I had been sober enough to know that it was late and time to go home.
I wish I wouldn't have let JC go home with that asshole.
I wish JC wouldn't have slept with him.
I wish Lance's face wouldn't have looked so horrified.
I wish Lance's face wouldn't look so pained now.
I wish Justin and JC would stop fighting.
I wish Lance would stop crying.
I wish I wasn't apart of this
I wish that this whole thing is a dream.
It wasn't as if me and Joey and wanted JC to go and fuck some guy. If we hadn't been so into dancing with all those girls, and if we hadn't had one too many drinks, maybe this whole thing wouldn't have happened.
Me and Joey got home that night at about two thirty, and we were so drunk, we must've woken up everyone on our floor were being so loud. I know we woke Lance up. He came out and asked us where JC was. Joey told him JC had come back early and was probably in his room. So Lance went to go check.
And I'll never forget his face when he opened the door to JC's room.
I can't even describe it. Lance opened the door, made that horrible face, and said, "Oh...my...God." He sounded like he was about to cry. I watched, confused, as Lance backed away from the door, as if it was burning him, tears forming in his eyes. Then I heard it, JC calling to Lance from his room. "Lance, no, God, it's not what you think...Lance!" and I saw JC run out, pulling his crooked boxers into place.
Lance just looked at JC, his face a mix of horror and pain. That's the best I can do to describe it. I was confused, and I knew by quickly glancing at Joey that he was too. Then, everything made perfect sense when we saw the guy from the club walk out of JC's room, straightening his rumpled clothes and holding car keys in his hand.
"How could you?" Lance asked quietly, and me and Joey forgot all about the guy from the bar, turning our attention back to JC and Lance.
"Lance...please...I was drunk...I was thinking about you and Justin...I was so drunk-"
"That doesn't excuse it! I told you I loved you and it was you I wanted to be with before you left! You can't make excuses about Justin because you knew I had chosen you!" Lance said, his voice getting louder, tears coursing down his face.
"Lance, please..." JC said quietly, tears falling down his own face. JC reached out for Lance, but he pulled away.
"Don't touch me," Lance said.
I heard a door open and saw that Justin had just come out of his hotel room, rubbing his eyes. "What's going on?" he asked tiredly, then he saw Lance and JC, both crying, and I can only guess that he saw Lance's face too, because suddenly Justin was wide awake.
"Lance, I was drunk, please..." JC started again, reaching for Lance. "I said don't touch me!" Lance yelled, backing away from JC and into the wall, the tears falling down his face hard and fast.
"What's going on?" Justin asked forcefully, concern written plainly on his face.
None of us could seem to find the words to say it. To say the harsh reality of it.
JC had slept with someone else.
I watched Lance slide slowly down the wall and hug his knees to his chest, wrapping himself into a ball.
"Lance, you have to understand, you have to forgive me, I'm so sorry, I wasn't thinking, oh God Lance, please..." JC begged, getting down on his knees in front of Lance.
Lance just looked away.
"Anyone care to explain what's going on?" Justin asked loudly, breaking the silence.
It was Joey who finally found his voice. "Tell me this isn't happening. JC, just tell me you didn't sleep with that guy from the club."
Justin looked sharply at JC. "You slept with someone?"
The silence was Justin's answer. "Oh my God, you asshole!" Justin yelled.
JC got up and said, "This is really none of your business, Justin."
"I can't believe it. How could you?" Justin asked.
"Maybe if you hadn't tried so hard to make Lance fall all over you, I wouldn't have done anything in the first place," JC snarled.
And I watched, as if everything was going in slow motion, as Justin went over to JC and punched him, knocking him to the ground.
"You bastard," JC yelled, getting up and lunging at Justin.
Joey ran over to JC and held him back, while I hurried over to Justin, who's a lot stronger than he looks.
"Don't you dare blame your fucking mistake on me! I had nothing to do with you going out and slutting around with some guy, so don't say it's all my fault you can't keep your dick in your pants!" Justin shouted, and I noticed that people down the hall were opening their doors to see what was going on.
"Don't talk to me like that, you-" JC started, but he was cut off by Lance, who had gotten up and looked really pissed.
"Shut up, all right? Just shut the hell up. Justin, JC is right, this really isn't your business, so why don't you just go back to sleep?" Lance practically shouted, and I felt the pain Lance's words gave Justin.
"And you," Lance said, turning to JC. "I want nothing to do with you right now. So just leave me alone."
And then, as if all the anger had left him, we all watched as Lance broke down and a choked sob left his lips. He turned and hurried off to his room, Justin looking torn between following and not.
JC went over to the wall and laid his head against it, closing his eyes and he looked so upset, I almost felt bad for him.
Almost.
I watched Justin give JC one last disgusted look before he turned back to his room.
Joey and I went to our rooms, leaving JC out in the hall.
That all happened about an hour ago, and I bet JC's still out there. I sure wouldn't want to sleep in his room knowing what had been done in there.
I didn't think it was possible for this group to get anymore screwed.
I was wrong.
*
