How to program in "C"

• Use lots of global variables.
• Give them cryptic names such as: X27, a_gcl, or Horace.
• Put everything in one large .h file.
• Implement the entire project at once.
• Use macros and #defines to emulate Pascal.
• Assume the compiler takes care of all the little details you didn't quite understand.

How to debug a "C" program.

• If at all possible, don't, let someone else do it.
• Change majors.
• Insert/remove blank lines at random spots, re-compile, and excecute.
• Throw holy water on the terminal.
• Dial 911 and scream.
• There is rumour that "printf" is usefull, but this is probably unfounded.
• Port everything to CP/M.
• If it still doesn't work, re-write it in assembler.
  This won't fix the bug, but it will make sure no one else finds it and makes you look bad.

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