In case you've ever wondered why ignorance rises to the executive level, here is a simple explanation that is also a mathematical proof.

By direct observation :
Knowledge is Power. (1)
Time is Money.

From Physics,
Power = Work/Time. From (1), Knowledge = Work/Money

Solving for Money, we get :
Money = Work/Knowledge

Now, take the limit of Money as Knowledge goes to zero. This is infinity for any finite amount of Work. Therefore, as one rises through the hierarchy one can expect incalculable wealth.

Putting Computer Errors in Perspective

Two men were examining the output of the new computer in their department. Eventually one of them remarked : "Do you realize it would take 400 men 250 years to make a mistake this big?"

1. You ask the waiter what the restaurant's core competencies are.
2. You decide to re-org your family into a "team-based organization."
3. You refer to dating as test marketing.
4. You can spell "paradigm."
5. You actually know what a paradigm is.
6. You understand your airline's fare structure.
7. You write executive summaries on your love letters.
8. Your Valentine's Day cards have bullet points.
9. You think that it's actually efficient to write a ten page presentation with six other people you don't know.
10. You celebrate your wedding anniversary by conducting a performance review.
11. You believe you never have any problems in your life, just "issues" and "improvement opportunities."
12. You explain to your bank manager that you prefer to think of yourself as "highly leveraged" as opposed to "in debt."
13. You end every argument by saying "let's talk about this off-line."
14. You can explain to somebody the difference between "re-engineering," "down-sizing," "right-sizing," and "firing people's butts."
15. You actually believe your explanation in number 14.
16. You talk to the waiter about process flow when dinner arrives late.
17. You refer to your significant other as "my co-CEO."
18. You like both types of sandwiches: ham and turkey.
19. You start to feel sorry for Dilbert's boss.
20. You account for your tuition as a capital expenditure instead of an expense.
21. You insist on doing some more market research before you and your spouse have another child.
22. At your last family reunion, you wanted to have an emergency meeting about their brand equity.
23. Your "deliverable" for Sunday evening is clean laundry and paid bills.
24. You use the term "value-added" without falling down laughing.
25. You give constructive feedback to your dog.

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