The Usenet Oracle has pondered your question deeply.
Your question was :
Orrie,
I'm about to graduate, and a degree in Philosophy never got anbody anywhere, so I'm seriously considering a career in crime. I would appreciate it if you could rate for me the top ten criminal activities in terms of their profit/risk ratio so that I can make an informed choice that will enable me to thumb my nose at society in comfort and with impunity.
And in response, thus spake the Oracle :
It pleases me to see a mortal displaying some modicum of intelligence;
for that reason I shall turn a blind eye to the lack of grovelling for the time being.
Here are the ten most popular criminal careers, with a brief cost/benefit analysis.
|
|
| |
| Government minister | The courts can convict you as often as they like; it makes no difference | Only people who are extraordinarily physically ugly get the job |
| Rubber-casketer | No rubber-casketer has yet been arrested | Lack of notoriety as no one has figured out what they do |
| Credit card fraud | *Really* easy, especially with the card likes of Netscape | Forgetting which one is your card |
| Tax evasion | No one seems to care very much about catching you | You have to be liable for tax to start with (and that means *work*) |
| Computer Crime | Fun; can be done from home in your spare time | Obesity, caffeine addiction, disdain from opposite sex |
| Stealing Cars | Fun, high profile, buccaneer image | Getting around a high-tech security system only to find it won't start because of damp leads |
| Social Security Fraud | Lots of publicity | Limited earning potential |
| Confidence Tricks | Intellectually challenging | Getting to like your victims |
| Drug Dealing | Lack of victim makes detection virtually impossible | Competition, demonization, too much like legal business |
| Corporate Crime | Compensates for incompetence | No access to spoils, inability to trust anyone |
