|
 Living 'Cuz I'm Alive
I often tell myself
I wish I didn't care
But when I find I don't
I'm frightened
I want to fade away
I'm tired of where I am
To forget and be forgotten
Is harmful
I'm doing this for you
But if not, you'd be fine
It's all so confusing
What's the point?
I'm making the motions
Heartless, systematic,
Because I know I should
I just act
My life feels empty now
My eagerness is gone
It's all for the future
Now is dead.
*~Jacklynn
|
|
|
Terminally Ill
I'm sick.
Infected in all the little parts
Sickness of a common type
That no potion can cure
One of the organs
But not of the blood
I'm weak in the spine,
In the head and the heart,
Rigamortis of the spine,
It's unhappily frozen in place
Straining from the pressure
The weight on my shoulders
Drained from the machine above
A pool of useless liquid
Impractically smooth and luxurious
Carved out of ice, freezerburned
It melts away in short, teasing bursts
Feeding the fires
Of the pumping organ below
Cloaked in scar tissue, bleeding still
Muscular from overuse,
Refusing to sleep.
Self-whipped and chained
An assembly line of misplaced impulses
Making assault on the security
Of the bony structure behind,
Chipping away forever,
But never quite successful.
A self-inflicted malady
An inter-betrayal of each faculty
For which the only cure
Is cooperation.
*~Jacklynn
|
|
| |
A Menu of Death, Rebirth and Renewal
All my parts have fallen
Into a bottomless pot
One by one, they rot and peel away
I'm a skeleton you see,
Pasta for bones,
Rivers of ink are my marrow.
I'll try to pour myself a recipe
Collecting new ingredients on my way
But it's not the same, you see.
I want back what was before.
Why follow a script I don't believe in?
Because to drift is folly
Fool yourself, my dear
Use the old trick of logic
Turn up the heat and melt away
If you mix it all together you'll be fine
Resculpt yourself out of edible clay
Feed your friends and your enemies
Feed upon yourself
Devour all that you can, while it's there
Hot and fresh and ready.
It's all about filling the gaps, then,
Cookie cutters on rewind
It may be hard and long and boring,
Letting the dough rise over time
And beating it down
Kneading it, and sculpting it time and again
But someday, the oven will work it's magic
Somehow it knows just what to do
To tease the life into any creation
I wait for my turn.
*~Jacklynn
|
|
|
|
The Beach
Sand through my fingers
Feels nice, but I know
That I'll never gather it back again.
My hands are no hourglass,
No simple time machine.
There's pleasure and pain in the sand.
It's hot on the feet, burning the skin,
But once you sink inside,
Down deeper where the sun's blocked out,
It's cool, comforting, sleepy.
I want to feel the sand again,
Buried in a castle made by you.
Feel it sliding on my skin as I lay down.
I miss the beach, it was a short walk
To the warm water and the waves.
I got carried away, and I'm still drifting.
*~Jacklynn
|
|
|
|
