Site hosted by Angelfire.com: Build your free website today!

SKIT NUMBERS UP

Characters

Guy, a teen-aged boy
Girl, a teen-aged girl
Mediator, a concerned friend

Stage Setting

The action takes place on the street.

Script

(Guy and Girl in the middle of an arguement. The Mediator enters.)

     Guy:
Well, if that's the way you feel about it, your highness....

     Girl:
Your highness? You should talk! You're the one who's always insisting that we do things your way.

     Mediator:
Hold it, hold it, are you two fighting again?

     Guy:
We wouldn't be fighting if she would be a little more reasonable.

     Girl:
Go ahead and leave without me. I don't need this kind of aggravation.

     Guy:
That's fine with me!

     Mediator (interceding):
Come on now you two, you're suppose to be friends.

     Guy:
Friends -- are suppose to be reasonable, not unreasonable.

     Girl:
It shouldn't be so unreasonable to expect a guy to respect a girl's feelings.

     Mediator:
She's right. We should all respect one anothers feelings. Look, I think I may have a remedy to this problem. I read about it in McCall's last week.

     Guy:
McCall's? What's a McCall?

     Girl:
It's a magazine.

     Mediator:
It had a really good article written by a leading psychologist, about resolving conflicts. He says that it's unhealthy to deal with conflicts directly. Using a passive technique works much better.

     Girl:
How does it work?

     Mediator:
Well, when you find yourself heading for a disgreement, instead of using harsh, negative words, you should express your emotions in a non-threatening way by assigning a numerical value between one and ten.

     Guy:
Huh?

     Girl:
I don't get it.

     Mediator:
Well, let's say you just started a disagreement and you feel very strongly in favor of something. In this case, you would simply assign a high value to your feeling, say an eight or a nine. If you strongly oppose the idea, then you would give it a low value, such as a two, or a three.

     Guy:
I can see it now. All we'll do from now aon is talk in numbers.

     Mediator:
No you won't. This technique will help diffuse the situation so that you two will be able to open up to a more constructive conversations.

     Guy:
I don't know about this.

     Girl:
Well, you won't know until you try.

     Guy (resigning):
All right.

     Girl:
Okay then, what about the movie?

     Guy:
What about it?

     Girl (exasperated):
How do you feel about it?

     Guy:
You know how I feel about it.

     Mediator:
Give a numerical value.

     Guy:
Alright ... (Thinks) Aaaah, It depends.

     Girl:
It depends doesn't count. (To Mediator) Doesn't it?

     Mediator:
No, you must give it a numerical value.

     Guy:
Well, it does depend. If you want me to go see the movie that you want to see then it's a definite two. If you're talking about going to see the movie that I want to see, then I'll give it a solid nine. If you still insist on seeing your crummy two point movie but are willing to eat at the restaurant where I want to go, then I may be persuaded to bump my original two number up to a four.

     Girl:
A four! -- Only a four!

     Guy:
Well, maybe a five, if you pay the bill -- but that's as high as I go!

     Girl:
You are so selfish!

     Guy:
What's so selfish about expressing my numbers in an open and meaningful way, besides you know how much I hate syrupy romance movies.

     Girl:
How about a seven, or at least a six and a half.

     Guy:
Nope. Five is as high as I'll go, and all bets are off if Tammy comes along -- and that's final.

     Girl:
I have to watch my sister tonight.

     Guy:
Then you go with your sister, and I'll go by myself, and we'll both have a zero time.

     Girl:
Well my score will be higher than yours because I won't be alone.

     Guy:
Well I'd rather be saving the world with Arnold Schwarzenegger, then trying to salvage an evening with your goofy little sister.

     Girl:
That's enough! One more derogatory remark about my sister and I'll give you a five. (Brandishing a fist)

     Guy:
I can't deal with this. I have to go or I'm going to be late for the show.

(The Guy exits.)

     Girl:
Some friend you are!

     Mediator:
I'm so sorry. Can we talk later? -- I'll call.

     Girl:
Don't bother. I'm going with an unlisted number from now on -- thank you very much!

(Girl exits, Mediator draws a deep sigh)

     Mediator (toward the audience):
I'm afraid I just scored a minus two.