New Atlantis- Hiro's home
Hiro's Comedy Palace- Held together with spit and kitten fur
Welcome to the future.
It's broken!!
Hello and welcome
to my homepage. My name is
Hiro Protagonist
, and I'd like to
welcome you to this, the second of my web pages. This page aims to
enlighten and invigorate, to stimulate the senses via various
philosophical and humourous prattlings and links to other places that
have influenced me and may help you in becoming a better
person.
Right enough of
that hippie bull shit on with the show.
My Jokes page- quite a few jokes. Not for the faint hearted
Click
here to read about the TRUE Jesus H. Christ.
The
myths of childhood, cruelly destroyed.
What's
REALLY going on! News stuff. (with a dig at L. Ron Blair in there as well!)
John "Hannibal"
Smith and Howling Mad Murdoch
2 men who have been very large influences in my
life. Murdoch 'cos he's so crazy cool and Hannibal because of his
belief in himself, and all round cheesiness ("I love it when a plan
comes together!")
Personally I think
the A-team is one of the best programs ever made and if you live in
England and you have Sky you should watch it on Bravo every weekday
night at 8:00p.m. But I'm not forcing you into anything, please don't
think that.
To go to a
really good A-team web site click below:
Sockii's
A-team web page
And for
some hilarious Mr T related shenanigans click here:
Mr. T Shrine
Hiro's cruelty
to animals corner.
"Cruelty to
animals?"
I hear you weep, but
yes it's true brutality to animals does exist. It's sad but true.
Like this cat here who is used as a 'backup' when a DJ's fingers have
got "spinning wackout cramp" and are in dire need of a rest. The cat
is brought out of it's box where it is kept under someones stairs and
roughly dumped on the turntables. A cats legs aren't long enough to
reach the ground so they cannot operate the decks as would a human,
and so the necessity to leave them like furry bricks on the record
turntable, scratching at records and making terrible, distressed
mewling sounds, which dancers and clubbers think is great and really
'hip'. Bastards.
Or this dog for
instance. Even though this little fella is only a cartoon dog (not
to be confused with 'Car dogs' which is worse) and thus NOT REAL it
is the best I could do to illustrate the sheer brutality of "Space
dogs".
These guys are kept
locked in cold dark rooms pretty much from the day they're born, a
few pinpoints of light coming in through special membranes in the
walls, to simulate space. These dogs could be sent to space as
company for those humans in distress on stricken space stations, the
cramped conditions that the dogs are kept in only makes them more
loving. But such dogs are rare, those who don't die from the crazies,
are made to sit an exam, which few dogs pass, because their canine paws are not adjusted to hold a pen. Those dogs who don't make it are cruelly shot in front of a crowd of small children, who are disturbed for life, but learn a valuble lesson about failure.
This may look amusing
or even 'cute', yes I can hear you- "Ahh look at the little pup,
isn't he sweet with his little space helmet on" but as I have said
reality is much harsher than a picture of a dog dressed in a space
suit.
As you can
see this monkey doesn't agree with my teachings. Are you like the
monkey? Are you frowning on what I have done? Are you happy to be
likened to a chimp? This place is not for you, leave now before you
evolve.
So, you survived the 'monkey' test? Well try this,
it's my South Park sound bites test. If you don't find these pant
wettingly funny then die.
gaydog.wav
jewsinsf.wav
mrhat.wav
humped.wav
smokcrak.wav
braniac.wav
And one gratuitious Father Ted sound:
knickers.wav
Enjoyed
by all? I should think so.
Would you like
to go the places where I got these from?
South
Park:
South
Park WAVS THIS PLACE IS NOW OFFICIALLY DEAD! DON'T EVEN TRY POKING IT WITH A STICK!
Father
Ted:
The
Craggy Island Examiner
So what
now? Well heres some more links:
Well
this is a page that has been a long time in the coming. It is my Australian (convict) mate Brad's page, it is nice. (I'm only joking about him being a convict. Not all Australians are convicts, just quite a lot of them.)
Koala
Bear's Tree house
My
brother's homepage, a bit more work in this one:
Caspar-one
monkey with a keyboard doing his bit
My other web
page:
Hiro
Protagonist's "cool stuff what I like" page.
Personally I don't
rate it to this one though.
Also one of my other
favorite sites, great place to make friends:
The hotel
chat
Great place to hang (murderers), maybe
I'll seeya there someday... but I doubt it.
Rasputins
Homepage
THIS PAGE IS ALSO NOW DEFUNCT! THIS IS DUE TO THE LAZINESS OF IT'S FAT OWNER!
Fez's
page of stuff
This is my
comedy buddy, and best mate, Fez's page. He's a bit obsessed by the Pixies though..... T'shall be his downfall
Tic's
webpage
This is my bud
Tic's page. I helped him set it up (I like to think). Have a gander. However beware of this place if you are afraid of spontaneous Spice Girl whining coming from your computer speakers.
You got a problem?
Something not working? Want a fight to the death? E-mail me with the
problem or the meeting place. Or sign my guestbook you idiots.
E-mail me at:
hiromax@hotmail.com
Make a mess in my guestbook
Guffaw at the efforts of others
OR... Sign my all new Slambook! It Asks You Questions! You Answer! Via the Gift Of the Keyboard!
View My SlamBook!
Sign My SlamBook!
This page has been
tested on animals. Of the sample of 10 monkeys who read this page, 7
reacted with complete indifference. 2 became homosexual, 1 .........
ESCAPED!!! He was last seen attempting to purchase shaving apparatus
with a stolen credit card. He has still not been caught. He should
not be approached, and on no account show him textbooks of nucleur
physics.
Click
HERE to vote for
this page as a Starting
Point Hot
Site.
If
you're going to fight you can go elsewhere.
Web Promotion
Email (just in case you forgot or cannot be bothered to scroll up): hiromax@hotmail.com