Guys

First of all, coming from a big high school and going to a big college I see lots of "stuff". Now a lot of times this stuff doesnt seem so good. Actually a lot of times it looks pretty bad. Tons of girls strut their bodies around here like nobodys business and guys fall all over them and treat them nice just to get a piece for the night. This is pathetic.

Relationships should NOT be based on stupid things like availablity, looks, willingness, or hormones. Lots of times these superficial things are combined with conviniece and its STUPID. There are no benefits to either person except a possible release of sexual frustration. At the same time, this is not very gratifying because the best kinda physical comes with someone you really care about.

Lots of girls believe that its okay if guys treat them poorly. And lots of guys think that its okay to treat their women in a condescending manner. HECK NO! This is NOT the way it works. For some reason simple things like respect are overlooked by men and women in relationships. The golden rule is that if you are not happy, then something should change. Nothing should compromise your happiness ever because there is simply no reason for it.

Relationships should be based on a few things. My friend Nancy compares it to the legs of a table. There should be physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual. Its pretty easy to understand and accept.

Physical ~ Well duh. Relationships usually have some kind of touching involved. Whether this touching is merely holding hands or "playing baseball" should be up to BOTH memebers of the partnership. If one doesnt feel uncomfy then nothing more should happen then what that person wants. In a physical relationship both partners should strive to please the other and make the other happy. Remember what goes around comes around!

Mental ~ An intellectual connection is important. Although usually it is way off-base, just consider how it would feel to be married to the person. Can you really picture yourself sitting around at 80 together? If you think that by this time you will run out of things to say or learn about each other, then chances are a relationships not going to work out. You should be able to learn from each other and about each other every day.

Emotional ~ Two people should have the ability to be intimate with each other. I mean intimacy in its most scary form.... Rather, two should be able to share their emotions and feelings, dreams and desires, fears and fancies with one another. If you are on two levels of emtion which are completely different it is not a good sign. Something is up.

Spritual ~ This is often the most overlooked part of a relationship. It is hard for me to give advice on this because I am only recently discovering this "4th leg". Spritually the both of you should have your heads on straight. If one of you is a believer and the other is not, it will cause problems. The two of you should be able to talk about spiritual issues and worship together. This will may bring the two of you closer than anything else.

That is about all I really have to say.... Just follow the happiness rule. No one should have to settle for anything but the best. It is really the bottom line.