
Angel: "Is this a bad time?"
Buffy: "Are you crazy? You don't just sneak up on people in a graveyard. You make noise when you walk. You stomp or yodel."
Angel: "Danced with is a pretty loose term. Mated with, might be a little closer."
Buffy: "Don't you think you're being a little unfair? It was one little dance, which I did only to make you crazy. By the way, behold my success."
Angel: "See? Whenever we fight, you always bring up the vampire thing."
Buffy: "Well, I didn't come here to fight!"
Stephan Vampire: "Rargh!"
Buffy: "Ooh! Oh right, I did!"
Buffy: "Gee, I wish they wouldn't leave open graves laying around like this."
Buffy: "Being called an idiot tends to take people out of the dating mood."
Xander: "Well, it actually kind of turns me on."
Buffy: "I fear you."
Buffy: "You also might wanna' avoid words like 'amenable' and 'indecorous'. You know? Speak English, not whatever they speak in, uh..."
Giles: "England?"
Buffy: "Yeah. You just say, 'Hey, I got a thing. You maybe have a thing. Maybe we could have a thing?'"
Giles: "Well thank you, Cyrano."
Buffy: "I'm not finished. Then you say, 'How do you feel about Mexican?"
Giles: "About Mexicans?"
Buffy: "Mexican. Food. You take her for food, for which you then pay."
Xander: "Now is it time to have a talk about the facts of life?"
Giles: "You know, I'm suddenly deciding this is none of your business."
Xander: "You know, 'cause that whole stork thing is a smoke screen!"
Giles: "Grave robbery? That's new. Interesting."
Buffy: "I know you meant to say 'gross and disturbing."
Giles: "Yes, yes, yes, of course. Terrible thing. Must put a stop to it. Damn it."
Cordelia: "Hello? Can we deal with my pain please?"
Giles: "There, there." (Pats her on the shouler)
Cordelia: "Eeuw! Why is it that every conversation you have has the word 'corpse' in it?"
Xander: "So we dig up some graves tonight?"
Willow: "Oh boy, a field trip."
Cordelia: "Darn, I have cheerleader practice tonight. Boy, I wish I knew you were gonna' be digging up dead people sooner. I would've canceled."
Xander: "All right, but if you come across the army of zombies, can you page us before they eat your flesh?"
Cordelia: "Oh!"
Giles: "Xander?"
Xander: "Huh?"
Giles: "Zombies don't eat the flesh of the living."
Xander: "Ha. Yeah, I know that, but did you see the look on her face?"
Xander: "You know, this might go a lot faster if you femmes actually picked up a shovel, too."
Giles: "Hear, hear!"
Buffy: "Sorry, but I'm an old-fashioned gal. I was raised to believe that men dig up the corpses and women have the babies."
Giles: "All right, then. Go on."
Xander: "You're closer."
Buffy: "Pathetic much?"
Angel: "We found some of them."
Buffy: "You mean, like two of the three?"
Angel: "I mean, like, some parts."
Cordelia: "It was horrible. Angel saved me from an arm."
Angel: "I think they kept some parts."
Buffy: "Could this get yuckier?"
Willow: "They probably kept the parts to eat!"
Buffy: "Question answered."
Giles: "What student here is going to be that well-versed in physiology?"
Willow: "Well, I can think of five or six guys in science club. And me."
Xander: "So, Will, come clean. Promise never to do it again, and we'll call it a night."
Buffy: "..."
Angel & Cordelia: "..."
Xander: "He joked."
Cordelia: "I don't wanna' go alone. I'm still fragile. Can you take me?" (to Angel)
Buffy: "..." (to Angel)
Angel: "..."
Cordelia: "Great, I'll drive."
Xander: "How about that? I aways pegged him as a one-woman vampire."
Buffy: "Okay, Giles. Just remember, 'I feel a thing. You feel a thing,' but personalize it."
Giles: "Personalize it?"
Buffy: "She's a Techno-Pagan, right? Ask her to bless your laptop. Have fun!"
Giles: "Wha? Oh, don't..."
Xander: "Best of luck."
Giles: "...leave."
Ms. Calender: "Good morning, Rupert."
Giles: "Ms. Calender?"
Ms. Calender: "Oh no, please. Call me Jenny. Ms. Calender's my father."
Xander: For the love of God, can somebody scratch my nose?"
Buffy: "What if that poor girl is walking around?"
Xander: "Poor girls, technically."