I bought a ticket to Australia for my holiday
Figured it’d be just the thing to wash the stress away
Got my boarding pass and found out alas
That I was seated in the middle row
The businessman beside me smelt like Old Spice and gin
The lady to the left was talking about her granchildren
Two kids behind me were screaming for their mom
She was screaming back, I wonder how come
I got the worst seat on the plane
By the time I land I’ll be insane
My legs are starting to go numb
And I just wanna kill someone
I got the worst seat on the plane
Bladder’s full and back’s in pain
Next time I have somewhere to go
Think I’ll ride my bicycle
I couldn’t go to sleep ‘cause the pillow’s too damn awkward
So I tried to watch the movie but it starred Kevin Cosner
The earphone’s hurt my head and the reading light was dead
And then the pilot said turbulence is on the way
The coffee on my tray was now on my lap
The old lady beside me had a heart attack
The children screeched so loud I thought my skull would crack
The businessman turned blue and threw up on my back
I got the worst seat on the plane
By the time I land I’ll be insane
My legs are starting to go numb
And I just wanna kill someone
I got the worst seat on the plane
Bladder’s full and back’s in pain
Next time I have somewhere to go
Think I’ll ride my bicycle
After seven hours I could take no more
So I tried to open the emergency door
But the flight attendant tackled me to the floor
She said “Go back to your seat, dear”
I said “I’d rather get off here”
I got the worst seat on the plane
By the time I land I’ll be insane
My legs are starting to go numb
And I just wanna kill someone
I got the worst seat on the plane
Bladder’s full and back’s in pain
Next time I have somewhere to go
Think I’ll ride my bicycle
