Appearance By: "The Living Legend" Chris Jericho
Location: Wait and see
People Mentioned: Ric Flair... a HELL of a lot of Ric Flair
Current Titles: XWF X-Title
Win/Loss/Draw Record: 1/0/0
Singles Record: 1/0/0
Tag Team Record: 0/0/0
Longest Streak: 1 win without a loss
Current Streak: 1 win without a loss
Authors Comments: A bit short, but didn't have much time (I know I also put this for the last one, but hey... if it's true twice, why not say it twice?
Madness is holding a pre-show filled with "dark matches" (for the uneducated, they are matches of too low quality to be televised) and interviews regarding the big matches from Madness, namely the World title match and the big I Quit match between two of the cockiest men in the business; Ric Flair and Chris Jericho. As one of the dark matches between two unknown competitors comes to an end, one man pins the other 1...2...3! But instead of the corny generic music that's been picked out for him, a different sound of a mechanical whirling hits as the lights go out and the Y2J countdown appears on the screen, counting down in seconds and milli-seconds. The seconds are timed perfectly with the whirling.
06...
05...
04...
03...
02...
01...
00...
BOOM!
The pyros explode as a voice yells "BREAK THE WALLS DOOOOOOOOWN!" Jericho's theme music "Break Down The Wall" plays as we see a clip of Jericho's silhouette walking through a computer grid tunnel, then we see him on the stage, facing away from the audience with randomly colored lights flashing on him, with both arms out to his sides, making the sides of his open-fronted short sleaved jacket hang out. He gives both fists a couple shakes then spin around, as the jacket and his hair wave behind him and we see his newly won X-Title around his waste, under the jacket. He walks down the ramp, occasionally pointing to the belt as if to give the hold word a big "I told you so". When he gets to the ring he walks up the steps onto the apron and lays his right arm on the ropes and takes a few long struts, then hooks his left on it as well and leans back, bouncing on the ropes, which makes the lights reflect off of his belt. When he gets into the ring, he signals to the ringside technician to get him a mic, which he does. Jericho steps into the middle of the ring as the music slowly fades out and the lights return to normal. Jericho raises the mic and begins to speak.
-:Chris Jericho:-
Ladies and gentlemen.... you are about to witness something that may shock and astound you. Those of you with heart problems, weak stomaches, or those of you who are easily offended should look awayand plug your ears... and parents, you may want to cover your childrens eyes, cause this is pretty digusting. You see I am about to run footage of the new shockingly horrific sequel to the age-old horror classic "The Blob"... for those of you not familiar with The Blob, it was about an alien organism that resembled a large glob of digusting, waving goo... anyway, ROLL THE CLIP!
The screen shows a large pale mass, waving around over top of a red form of some sort, this appears to be a severe close-up, and as the camera zooms out we see that the pale blob was just Ric Flairs midsection, the red was his wrestling shorts and he's running off the ropes in a clip from an old match. We then cut back to Jericho who has a disgusted look on his face similar to the one from the popular Sour Starburst commercial. The crowd boos uncontrollably at the total lack of class shown by Y2J.
-:Chris Jericho:-
You see what I mean, WASN'T THAT SICK? That was just digusting! All that cellulite just flapping around every time he runs... and did you see where his stomache met those tights? I thought you had to be drunk to have a HANG-OVER! But you know, that's beside the point... enogh poking fun at the old bag o' bones, let's get on topic, let's talk about the big I QUIT match at Madness. Let's actually start by addressing the comments made by Mr. Flair earlier in the week about said match, so you ass clowns in the back roll THAT video!
The scene shows up on the screen of Flair standing there in his stupid ass little tights and his moronic T-shirt flapping his gums once again...
-:Ric Flair:-
Jericho needs to realize he wouldnt have been the champion last week at Alliances if it wasnt for me and Christian walking that aisle and grabbing the attention of Shadow. But thats fine.. Jericho called me out! Jericho wants me in the middle of that ring this week at Madness. Hes gonna be the unluckiest rat bastard the XWFs ever seen. The match, the stipulations all picked by Y2J himself, Ill tell you what big shot, you got balls? You got the balls to put your money where your mouth is? I dont think so! And if you do why not put that X title on the line right here this week at Madness against me! Whoooooo! You and me, the I quit match. You quit, I become the X champion and you become the EX-Champion! So step up to the plate pal. Im Ric Flair and your not. Sixteen time worlds champion, Ive got no fear of stepping into the ring against a crybaby like you Jericho. This is your premeire shot to stardom. Head lining with Ric Flair. Everyone on the roster wish they had my name next to theirs on the card cause that means one thing...
-:Chris Jericho:-
Whoa Whoa Whoa... stop the tape, stop it right there. You're right Flair, everybody does wish their name was where mine is, right on the other side of the big versus sign from yours, but it's not for the reason you think, you see... to be put up against Ric Flair doesn't mean a spot on the Highlight reel...no no no... BEING CHRIS JERICHO is the only way to truly deserve a spot on the highlight reel, being put up against Ric Flair means... the night off, and a free win. You see, it takes no skill, no talent, no real passion to outwrestle a slow, crippled, beaten old man. As I will show the world... a match with Ric Flair is the wrestling equivilant of being a VIDEO GAME TESTER... it's a big joke, you sit around and watch the cash come in, much like I will sit back, barely breaking a sweat and listening to your croaky old voice screaming those sweet words "No, pleeeeeeeease, Jericho no... don't.... OOOOOOOOOH MYYYYYYY GOOOOOOOOD, that's it! I quit! I've had enough!" I hope you're ready Ric, cause I'm going to pull out all the stops... I warned you not to underestimate me, but you couldn't help yourself... you had to go and credit yourself and Christian for my big win, you say that I wouldn't have won without you distracting Shadow, but seriously... give credit where credit is due, there aren't many things Shadow can do, but I'm sure she's not deaf.... I know she heard the referee counting to three, you guys being on the ramp was just an easy way out... it was just an excuse because she knew my win was inevitable and it'd be better to act distracted and say it was unfair than to get her ass kicked and end up being pinned herself. How would she explain that? The fact of the matter, Flair, is that all your pressence did last week was piss me off... you see, NOBODY takes the spotlight off the champ! Nobody... and I mean NOBODY makes my wins look cheap and gets away with it. Flair, a week ago I expressed a general distain for you... a professional dislike for a fellow competitor, nothing all that serious... but now, you worthless age-old RECTAL WORT, it's personal... now, I hate you not only as a competitor, but as a person... I dispise not only your wrestling, but everything about you. And when things get personal with me Flair... I become a very dangerous man. So you better watch your back... your front... to the sides, up and down and ALL AROUND, Flair... because I could strike from anywhere... at any time.
-:Chris Jericho:-
You know something, though, Flair... you got me thinking about something. You said that these days wrestlers just want everything handed to them, and you're right... a lot of these young pups don't know the frst thing about working for a living... but if you think that's what I'm all about you're DAMN wrong. I've been a champion in Japan, I've been a champion in Germany, in Mexico... in Canada... and in COUNTLESS Federations in the U.S. before I became recognizable. I worked my ass off day in and day out to become this.... this OPITOMY OF AWESOMENESS! And I've finally reached the peak of my career, Now I am this company's Mel Gibson... I'm the wrestling worlds Brad Pitt... satisfying the fans in this building with my amazing athletic ability and absolutely gifted mic talent, much like right now... and later on, satisfying those same guys girlfriends in a totally different way. But you see, I earned the right to be every bit as cocky as I am, so when you ask me if I'll put my X-Title on the line at Madness my answer is....
HEEEEEEEEEEELL NO!
The way I see it Flair, is that past accomplishments can only take you so far... sixteen time world champion, WHATEVER! Maybe you had your nights back in your hayday, but what have you heald recently? When I was the first ever WWE undisputed champion... what were you? A nobody! Now that I'm XWF X-Champion what are you... still a nobody? Yeah, that's what I thought. If you want a shot at this title Flair, you're going to have to earn it... so I'll tell ya what... IF you beat me this week, which believe me... you won't THEN I'll give you an X-Title shot NEXT week, but if not, then mark my words old man... the closest you'll eer get to this belt, is if I LET you look at it while you're lying on your back screaming "I Quit". If you lose this match Flair... then for as long as I'm champion, you will NEVER lay one finger on this belt until somebody else rips it from my cold dead fingers! Now hit my damn music!
As Jericho's music plays again, he jumps out of the ring and takes off the belt, holding it up in the air with both arms, then closing the snaps on the smallest size, hooking it over his right shoulder and doing a mock version of Flair's strut up the ramp, then turns and lets out a huge "Whoooooo!" before going through the doorway and into the backstage area.
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