Remember the first time you met him in person at that hotel. When you walked through those doors you were so scared you almost wanted to run back out again, your heart was beating so fast and you were so excited and afraid that he wouldn't like you at the same time. You never doubted that he would be wonderful, you just doubted that he would like you.
You saw his mom sitting there and you freaked, everything became more real to you, you were going to meet him, he was upstairs seeing if you called, you were late because you were convinced that maybe you had made a mistake...but your heart still pushed you to go.
You turned around and there he was. Your heart stopped, your eyes searched him for a flaw but the only thought that came into your mind was "I love you." You stared into his eyes, even if only for a second it calmed you in an instant. Your heart melted and the whole world became a blur except for him. You couldn't speak, you had to look away, this is the person you gave your heart to, this is the person that you've been dying to see and you can finally see his face, his body, his self, his eyes, standing in front of you with nothing to hide but what feelings that lie inside.
It was that moment you knew for sure that you weren't going anywhere...remember that.
+++++++++++++++-----------------+++++++++++++++
9/12/03 updated 9/21/03 What Do I Love About Mark:
He makes me happy
I can talk to him
He balances me out; I'm emotional and logical, he doesn't show his emotions as much outside and keeps them in and is reasonable
I love his cute little smile because it makes me happy to see him smile, his whole face lights up and its just...amazing...
I love his point of view when I actually get to hear it which may not be as often as I like, but its still interesting when I get to hear it
I finally know that I can trust him, and we all know how hard it is for me to trust people now don't we? Yes andrea, YES ANDREA! yes andrea. right-o
I'm melodramatic, over emotional, controlling, spoiled, a brat, a bitch, annoying, i think i know everything and I dont, and i treat people like shit...but he loves me anyway...and when im around him, im always trying to be better than all that and stop it all together, because i dont want to hurt him or piss him off by doing those things...he makes me try to better myself...and look how far i've come because of him...he gives me the will to do better, he gives me that push in the right direction because i care so much and because he'll listen to me even when I wouldnt even listen to me!
I know that I can always have fun with him, i mean just think about how much fun we had together when i was with him in real life!
His mind is a palace...it's actually worth wanting to hear, unlike most others...he actually has something interesting to say
He helps me be patient because he's so patient
Hell, if I wasn't so stupid I'd prolly love DND and love roleplaying and do it every night too if I was there, because i love that stuff, I just dont let myself like it because im afraid of what everyone else will think...even though the only person who would care would be me
I like playing comp and video games with Mark, even though I dont get to very often...
He makes me comfortable...
He helps me loosen up and try to be myself for once
I love the way he kisses me...
I love the way he hugs me...and holds me...and looks at me...
I love his voice
I love the way he dresses, and I really do dig his ride
i love the way he teases me
i love when he looks into my eyes with glasses on, it's just amusing, makes me realize how much I love him, but then again so does everything above and below
i love walking with him at night
i love watching movies with him and seeing how hard he concentrates
i love the way he plays ddr, its just adorable, i can't say anything more, i've never seen anyone else do it the way he does its just...cute...
i like it when he wears that robe of his its just adorable! it looks so cute on him! *imagines*
i love the way he makes me feel inside...that warm feeling when I see his face, even when its on webcam, that tingly feeling I get when I hear his voice, that giggliness i get whenever i think about him
i love the fact that I can imagine my life with him and how great it would be...just knowing that I'd have him to share it with...(oh how mushy!)
i love cooking with him
I love the fact that when he actually tells me he loves me, that he really means it, because I know he wouldnt say it unless he meant it in his heart
I love the way he sleeps in the car with his mouth partly open and his head tilted back, and without snoring it looks kinda funny, hehehe
I love the way he holds my hand, cause god knows I can't just hold someone's hand like a death grip and never let go, my hand would get hot!
I like it when he hits on me and doesnt realize it
I like it when he tries to be all sexy and suceeds in the cutest way
I like his butt! okay im sorry too much info...yeah andrea whats the matter with you! hush up you multiple personalities. okay :o(
I love the way he makes me feel sane even when I know I'm not
I like just the way he acts, how laid back he can be, how goofy he can be, hell im even afraid to mention that I like him when he's joshed.
I like the way he uses the english language to confuse me, it's kind of interesting in a way because everything he says makes sense, only society makes it so that its confusing by their standards...i wish I could speak markian blutarkian, you know...that actually sounds like a cool language! man now i wanna learn it!
I appreciate the way he handles me when I'm mad...and when he's mad...i mean, im so used to just getting yelled at and cussed out, and its like...with mark when I'm mad he just makes me not mad anymore with the things he says, even when he tells me to settle i have to fight to stay mad and then i'm just not anymore, and when he's mad its like oh my god...i did something horrible, im so sorry, please don't kill me, or...okay, its not my fault, he's mad at something else...back away slowly...but either way he'd never flat out yell at me and go on and on until i dont even care he's mad like almost anyone else i know would.
I love the way he trusted me enough to cry on my shoulder that night...just that fact that he doesnt cry very often and then doing it in front of me...it just felt...like he trusted me more than anyone else...like he really loved me enough to do that...it was then i realized that he loved me...before that i had doubts, but after that no...theres nothing to doubt...
I think the things he likes are just so cool like rock and roll racing, wc3 (even though im against it...i dont actually know why either...), diablo, role playing, never winter nights (which looked kinda cool but he didnt get very far while i was there, but it sounded cool), ddr...
I like the fact that he includes people
I like the fact that he cares about his friends and hangs out with them so much
I like the way he thinks, and I even get his reasoning to josh...it is fun...and he did research it...he's not stupid, i mean at least its not cigarrettes, and he doesnt like beer and i dont blame him, but yeah he does like some stuff but thats okay, because i like the fact that he tries to live his life without ruining it completely. It's like he has a reason for everything he does, i just love that...i still dont love josh...but eh, what cha gonna do
He makes me feel special, and thats a damn good feeling
He makes me feel loved by the things he says and does, and just being in his very presence makes me feel loved, even his voice makes me feel loved, damnit that boy loves me!
He respects me
I love the way he's willing to wait till marriage if I am...my virginity is an important thing, but maybe i just need to wait till the time is right, not till marriage...but just knowing that he'd wait with me is just amazing, i love him so much for that Oh my god im going to cry i love this boy so much!
I love how gentle his touch is
I feel like a stalker for loving him so much!
I love the way that...you know what? I love just about everything about him, and what I don't love I can deal with...he fits...he's what fits...and I think I'd do just about anything for him...
