We didn't realize it, but Hippensteel Funeral Home in Lafayette does funerals for infants at virtually no cost to the grieving family. What an amazing outreach that is! We are so thankful to them for this service.
Kolby's Dad preached the funeral service and the following is the sermon he delivered:
Nothing But Joy
Kolby Joseph Metzinger November 26, 2003-December 10, 2003
"My brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of any kind, consider it nothing but joy, because you know that the testing of your faith produces endurance; and let endurance have is full effect, so that you may be mature and complete, lacking in nothing." (James 1:2-4)
At first glance, these words seem like foolishness. What can James mean by “consider it nothing but joy” when we suffer so? It sounds like some new pop psychology. “Don’t worry. Be happy.”
It seems like even more nonsense when you understand the lives of the people to whom James was writing. They were first-century Jewish Christians, who were not liked by the mainstream Jews. They were seen as heretics, a cult, and a false offshoot of a longstanding religious tradition. And they were not welcome anymore. One of their own had been stoned to death already, and now the local authorities were looking for more of them to hang. In order to save their own lives, they had to pack their bags and run, leaving behind their families and friends, jobs and homes, and their beloved city Jerusalem forever.
And James was telling them to consider it “nothing but joy?” It sounds like a bunch of hog-wash, doesn’t it. It all seems like a bunch of pie-in-the-sky. Like wishy-washy feel-good theology; but out of touch with reality. “Grin and bear it!” But here it is, in the Bible, written just as much for us as it was for the early Christians who were forced to flee their homes. What can it mean?
It seems to me James isn’t really trying to push some new smiley-faced ideology, but what he is really saying to us is that faith in God should radically transform the way that we see things. Let me say that again, faith in God should radically transform the way that we see things. The early Christians, to whom James was writing, could not have imagined that their plight would be used to advance God’s love to the rest of the world. When they were forced to leave Jerusalem, they went out all over the Roman world and planted Christian churches everywhere in relative peace. The suffering that they endured laid the foundation for what we know today as the church. It’s worldwide now, no longer just a faction in the dark alleys of an ancient city.
Faith in God should radically transform the way that we see things.
We recognize that we are limited. We can only see from our own perspectives. We feel only our own pain. We suffer and cannot understand why. But if we believe in God, then we really need no explanation. Because faith in God should radically transform the way that we see things.
And what do we see before us today? Precious Kolby; lying still; eternally asleep. So much potential wasted. A little boy who was born “incompatible with life,” but yet who lived. But for what? Only to die thirteen days later? It all seems so useless. Tragic. Inconceivable. And what else? An empty bed at our house. Stuffed animals with no one to hold them. Clothes with no one to wear them. Blankets to keep no one warm. Little Kolby, his Mom and Dad’s pride and joy. Dead now and never coming back. It’s too painful to see. We hurt like we’ve never hurt before. Our hearts have been ripped apart. We play the scene of his death over a million times a day and wonder another million “if-onlys.” We cry at the smallest things, and wonder why a loving God would put us through this. We pray that it is only a nightmare, but we know that it is not. Our Kolby is gone.
But faith in God should radically transform the way that we see things. We say we believe in God, that belief has just smacked up against its most difficult test. This is where our faith dangles on a thread. What do we believe? Can we consider this, as James put it, “nothing but joy?” Perhaps not yet.
But someday, perhaps, we will remember that in Kolby, we have experienced joy. His Grandfather said at one point, that Little Kolby had lived long past his life expectancy and still didn’t have anyone mad at him! Not only that, but he had everyone wrapped around his tiny fingers. He did pretty good, didn’t he.
From the moment we laid eyes on him we were in love with him! He was just the cutest little guy! Some of the nurses at the hospital told us that they all wanted to take care of Kolby. They loved him, and were deeply moved by him. He was such a little miracle! Such a little fighter! He struggled for every breath but inspired so many of us along the way! He taught us all to expect the unexpected in God’s world! He taught us that in God’s world there are no limits to what one can do! He surprised the Doctors with stability when a baby with Thanatophoric Dysplasia simply was not supposed to live for any time at all! We all watched as this little guy kept getting stronger day by day, until he could position his own head to improve his airway! The miracle of Kolby’s Story branched out of that little hospital room and into the hearts and souls of hundreds of people! Time and time again Diane and I have been so deeply moved by the stories of others who shared how blessed they were by his story! He moved people in several states, in different churches, in factories, and administrative offices. Kolby moved people in the hospital and in their homes, and in our home! He has reached more lives showing the love of God better than a thousand preachers and he’s never even uttered a word! He’s traveled long distances and touched lives all over without ever taking a step! He has given us all perspectives on what our priorities should be, without even knowing what a priority is! What an inspirational God-sent little child Kolby Joseph is! And I for one am so thankful to God for bringing him into this world because my world is so much the better place for it! He has moved me like no one else ever has! He has rekindled my faith in God, a faith that was standing on a broken leg! He has renewed my passion for touching lives, and for sharing what a wonderful heavenly Father we have! Through Kolby’s life God has touched my heart of stone and melted it for the entire world to see. And I CONSIDER IT NOTHING BUT JOY FOR HAVING KNOWN HIM! I GIVE THANKS TO GOD FOR HIS GREAT GIFT OF KOLBY!
Faith in God should radically transform the way that we see things. God knows what he is doing, and Kolby’s short fourteen days have moved many people. He’s touched more than I could ever hope to. He has been an instrument of God’s open acceptance of us all. Kolby has been an invitation to all of us to come to God and expect that surprises will follow. God is not in the box that we often try to fit him into. He does new things, and there is no end to his love. Kolby has gone home now. Goodbye sweet angel. We thank God for you. We praise God for you. And into God’s hands we commit your spirit. In Heaven, you can run. In Heaven, you can jump. In Heaven, you can play. In Heaven, you, Kolby, can rejoice.
Last night after everyone had left, we noticed a piece of paper on the table with Kolby’s things. It was a poem written by one of the visiting nurses who had come to our home titled “Precious Kolby.” She was warned before coming to help us with Kolby that this would be a tough case: an infant who was terminal, perhaps the toughest medical case of all. Nonetheless, she came, and was deeply moved by God’s Spirit in Kolby. She felt compelled to write about him. She wrote these words,
You came to the earth November 26, 2003, ‘twas barely two inches from your toes to your knee,
Your tiny fingers could barely grab mine, But we hoped and we prayed you’d grow in time,
Your poor little nose had a tube for your feed, And an oxygen cannula to meet your need,
You were pretty pink with blue on your soles, You were a true miracle, for sure, to behold.
Your Mommy and Daddy knew about you from the start, That your body was small, but you had a big heart.
And all of us who met, held, and cared for you, Could see why these feelings were so true.
Kolby touched people. Kolby was an instrument of God’s grace. Kolby preached that God’s love holds us.
Kolby showed us that we can’t always explain the things that we see, but that Faith in God should radically transform the way that we see things.
God had a purpose for Kolby’s life. Diane and I would have loved to have had more time. Perhaps someday we’ll understand. We weep today. But none of us can deny that we are right to consider Kolby as nothing but joy.
