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Old Storys @ 5.56 13:00:00 ??  Lil Bittel @ 10/16/2001 01:57:35 PM I feel so numb Have you ever been in a dark errie place and felt the hair on your neck stand on it's end? Have you ever just completely locked up to the point where you couldn't move or speak? Have you ever felt like something was walking on your spine? Have you ever had that feeling that someone was watching you from all angles in the cold night air? Well if you said yes to any of these, it's because of lost souls and the undead. Most likely what you've incountered is a channeled spirit which that which is dead but cannot leave the area near its' death. I have been through a whole lot of shit, and the question of where I came up with this name for the site arose last night. So I answered the question on WASTEDLIFE.com. However I warn anyone who anticipates something supernatural to happen to them, turn away from it. People wonder why I can be so fucked up at times. Well the things that have happened to me have a big impact. I have been freaked out, scared litterally to death, frightened into a coma state, and I still wake up in the middle of the night at times to feel a cold chill along my neck. This post today isn't a funny twisted story, but rather a serious annotation of things which you should never fuck with. I am already screwed up as if, so I am alright to do so. I soon enough am going to figure out whatever is up with WELLS HALL within the next few weeks. The laughter, the perfume, the peaking man, the psych ghost, even the rancid sulfer smell. These aren't no scooby doo mysteries either. They have actually occured after going by and speaking with a janitor. To frankly be brief with you, we have unleashed hell all over the place withing the past two years. I've spoken with the dead who in return told me the model # on my guitar to me. I have felt evil in places when I walk on a daily basis. No I am not a psychic, but I can feel this stuff now. Rather strange, but I always feel as if something is still a part of me from all the Ouija and places we have visited unwanted. I'll keep everyone updated. I have to do some more research.

Lil Bittel @ 10/15/2001 02:17:13 PM Butterscotch, Lighters, and a half eaten twinkie Ah, after my shortcomings I have updated this bastard once again. It's funny how I work to make this site working and the same with Wastedlife.com. Huh, funny however I am working on some sort of a saga. Maybe I can dedicate this page to the suckiest hair stylest in the world.Possibly I could dedicate this page to the millions of smokes I have partaked in. Hell it's not out of thought, but maybe I could turn this page into a page dedicated to cottage cheese. But would that be like me? No. I have rekindled the point of my page. Which is, divide, conqour, drink some beer, and make you laugh your socks off. As I glance out my window at work I stare at the regular people that walk among us. You wonder, what are they thinking, where are they going, are the hot girls single, that guy looks like sammy hagar, damn he/she is scary, I wonder if they were in that show Growing Pains, etc etc. The list goes on an on. Anywho, I sit here and I think, we need a story. A story about a man, a man with great dignity, a man/woman, who can look at someone and make them quiver at the knees. Well, sorry that story is out of the picture. Instead I am going to talk about the copying machine. Yes this magnificent devise does wonders. I place my hands upon it. I feel the warmth of the radiation coming from it. Ah, the perfect copy. It takes great skills to make the perfect copy of your hands/ass. I answer the phone, the man is loud. I want to yell at him as I am typing this and talking but I can't because I have to be nice. Funny how life is so cruel when you say you don't have the answer so you transfer him to the wrong office. HAHAHA vengence is mine. Ok, well the copying machine it tired, I think it needs to be replaced with a mouse in a cage. This mouse could run run run run run run run run for hours until he pass's out of boredom. That or I could quit losing train of thought and end this post because I am watching you and I know where you live. Actually I don't , but if I had a phone book I could find out.

Lil Fn' Bittel @ 09/28/2001 12:18:57 PM What I want for Christmas To all who read this, this is my wishlist for christmas. Hopefully along with this, you will pity me, give me money, so I can go out and buy these wonderful toys. 1) A Lawn Mower - Yes that's right a lawn mower, not one of those push kinds, this is one that you can ride on and race other lawn mowers for pink slips. 2)8 minute Abs video - so I can finally get those ab's I have always wanted. 3) A Red Rider B-B Gun - So I can shoot my eye out and sue That Movie with that kid that always says , " Oh Fudge". 4) A convienence store so I can go and get my smokes and have cool clerks who make star wars comments about everything while working. 5) A pony - Then when my car breaks down I could use it as an alternative use of transportation. 6) Finally , about 63 box's of Eggo Waffles - These come in handy whenever you want to dry up spilt milk, they are good throwing objects, they make good ear muffs, and if you burn them you can always feed them to the birds/family pet.

Ziggi @ 09/04/2001 12:03:44 PM Hot Chicks are unsilenced now! I am seased to sat that all the fine, AOPi's, AlphaGamm's, and the other sororities new members can verbally speak to us guys now. I find it great that they don't ignore me now when I say hello, goodbye, oh I see how it is, it's alright that you keep walking away, I give up, etc etc. Such a relief, now I can get my groove on. Hmm, well today is my free day. Thinking about going out to buy Wayne's World 1 and 2. Cheah! Excellent, Party on Garth. But in the meantime I am going to work on some individual task. For example, divise a plan where I can balance stability while helping others pack trash in a garbage toter. May I not pull a groin muscle by my clumsiness again. On other notes, this site will be updated off and on due to the fact that I don't have as much free time anymore till tuesdays. See when I was in highschool, I had nothing better to do than party, school, work , and maintain this site. Now I added studying, chillin with my brother and friends, and maintaining set standards. So my free time of hardcore wrestling, wild women, dirty dancing(Patrick Suaze or whatever your name is sucks), diggin for the mole people, etc has been shut down temporarily. Anywho, off to complete my missions in life.

Ziggi @ 08/30/2001 11:05:26 PM Leroy, The Messenger from Hell Today has been cool, Kiah, Mr Clean, and some other dude, traveled with me to Winslow(don't eat the meatloaf, for the love of GOD it has eyes!). We embraced the awesome power of hard rain. We also got to laugh at people who were in a wreck. But needless to say, we were soaked, had some good conversations, and I ended up eating some kind of ice cream that looked like a smurf biprocessed into it. But that's not the point of this post. Yes Kiah and I have decided to find a cat. Yes a messenger cat. His name, Leroy. Leroy will have a little bell collar on his neck. He will be purposely used to deliver notes back and forth to the 3rd and 4th floor or Regents. The elevator will make good use for its' top secret mission. Then if the cat is seen by the RA, he will find the nearest window, and leap, yes leap to the ground(cause cat's always land on their feet, except from the 10th floor). Also this cat could deliver messages like,"Watch out sucka, Mr.Clean is gonna get ya." That or other various slangs. On other notes, I am heading to the boro this weekend to visit my friends back home. Damn I miss them. Until then, Burba and I will sit and watch Tombstone, that or wait for him to get back from door to door knocking on finding someone with some sort of good food.

Ziggi @ 08/28/2001 05:39:12 PM I have a problem I'm back, sorry about being without internet for abut 7 days or so, it has literally been killing me. However after dropping mucho dinero on an ethernet card, I am back. Anywho about my problem. It is something that most americans and catholics become. After just a few you get hooked. Yes, I have a drinking problem. Everytime I pick up a cup/can/bottle,and start to drink it, it spills all the hell over me. What is with that? Am I not cordinated enough even to do something even a toddler can do by himself. I seriously thought about going to AA , but I remembered that I would look like a dumbass in front of druggies, alcoholics, child abusers, don king, etc. Sad isnt it. Maybe I can cope with just being a damn idiot, that or disfunctionate.

Ziggi @ 08/22/2001 01:55:26 PM Look, I updated finally, I feel soo special I'm back, yes I have returned to update the Silence. How I love Murray. I want to give a shout out to all the fans of the site who are here in Murray. Anyways whats on the story sheet today? Soap operas. Have you ever noticed that in these shows, people seem to be killed, yet the next season the come back from the dead or something and live for a few more seasons, get killed, come back. Now usually if someone dies, they don't come back 3-4 times. I just don't get it. You have your Lukes, Tadd, Cowboy, the other guy who looks evil, that ignorant guy who is gay, the monkey. The list goes on and on. So I am sitting here at a friends house, Amyee, his roommate has been watching days of our lives. Now I just don't understand this whole line-up of people with such dialogue that inclides,"Your a stupid loser" and "I guess you werent holding the ball right". I would love to make a soap opera called, Something In the General Days of All My Children. It would be a cool soap opera, the line-up would include, Tom - A fisherman in a wheelchair who likes to eat rabbits, Billy - A Tia Bo watching, bowling monkey, Susy - A narcaleptic lesbian who has a twin brother who is a cross dresser, The Dude - well he's just the dude, and the rest of the gang is on the sketching board, that or if the episodes get off course we can bring over fat albert and the gang to join the fun. This show would include, drunkin crazyness, nakedness as in every other soap, lots of deer running across the roadways, people walking in people's house's going to the fridge, grabbing a sandwich and then leaving without saying a word, and the occasional person dying and coming back the next season. Look for this new soap this fall.

Ziggi @ 08/16/2001 06:31:44 PM Adventures in the tobacco wonderland My first day free from work and what do I go and do? Well it's big, green, hot, filled with spanish americans, crawling with wampus cats, hot weather, and stories that would make you laugh to your hearts content. All in a good days work. Tobacco! I had to help my neighbors out, I mean is wife is having a kid within the next few days, he's leaving for college, and whatever help I could do I was happy to do so. Hell even an old friend came in from Murray to help. Michael Wood it's good to see ya again for the weekend. However I heard some funny stories about Tim Stark. How is the shirtsleeve sop cap man? I bet it was pretty hot, and now I understand why you talked about the pain of it cause I had Wood to back you up on it. Anyways, he said your totally cool in his book, which was ironic because we'll be workin together and chillin a lot. Funny shit man. Well, I just want to announce that Sat. We are throwing a big going away party for everyone leaving at Wes Midciff's field. (BYOB)cause I ain't sharing. Anywho, something was brought up in the fields that I think is funny. Real men, shit their britches. Nuff said. I also wonder about Aaron's fear of taking a piss when people are about 30 yds away? Hell man, don't think about it, just let it go man. I could be in front of Walmart and if I had to piss bad enough I would do so. One last note for today, whoever this "Gunner" guy is who signed the G-Book on Wastedlife.com saying stuff about Keohan best watch himself. That is soooo immature and I think you need to be put in a pit of baby tree monkey's feeces and have drawn butter poured on you. You probably wondering, what is your kick on drawn butter? Well lets just say it's EXTREMELY HOT and will burn through flesh. Plus it's a bitch to get out of hair, clothes, shoes, ears, off cars, animals, and anything else that is part of our lives.

Ziggi @ 08/15/2001 12:10:27 AM (Insert Mild Angry Possibilities here) Well tonight has been a night filled with driving friend to meet up with girl who he likes which is getting nowhere, so all in all it was different. Sorry for putting ya in the Walls of Jericho - if your man enough to hit me you better be man enough to take it back(have fun at holiday world tomorrow and good luck in Flordia). Anywho besides all that today has been uneventful. Ran into an old friend of mine and Heath's. Steve Gardner(who taught me the ways of women), one heck of a guy. I'll get that number to ya a.s.ap.(or when I find it, or when I get to murray). Lets see, but something baffled me also today. What ever happened to the Rest of the A team? You know Mr.T ended up in Rocky and Collect Calls commercials. But what happened to all the other cool white guys? Were they killed in a tragic accident in the A Team Van? I don't think it is fair that a bunch of white guys with the same potential get the ax after the show went off the air. Heck even the old guy with the cigar in his mouth all the time could have done a collect calls commercial. What else what else. Sorry about the same post been up for the past few days. For some reason Angelfire has not been saving my post to the site. Hell I don't even know if this will make it on there. But if it does I will be happy. I added some cool new effects and a hangman game to keep entertainment on the site. Figure it might boost ratings and hits. As I also stated on Wastedlife.com, today is my last day of work. I have been there for 2 yrs. Crazy how time flys by. I am really going to miss the people I work with(well most of them except for 2 I can name). I am also going to miss being nice to the guest cause now I can be mean to them. I am going to miss that one guy who has to have 2 LPC's(Large Person Chairs)to sit down to eat, I am going to miss Mr. Pokemon who sat in the place every Thurs for 4 hours reading comic books(freak), I am also going to miss that one woman who wore the black glass's like she was blind and would drive out of the place like nothing ever had happened to her eyes(busted). On one final note, well, screw it, it's not worth the torment.

Ziggi @ 08/10/2001 01:25:15 AM A Priest, A Rabi, and a Amish Man walk into a Bar(the end) We all have heard them. Why does almost every joke have to involve, a blonde, someone gay, a priest, jews, rabi, black man, mexican, baby seal, an indian, and something sexual. I wish I was so original to come up with jokes about things. Everytime I hear one I end up messing it up anyways. For example, there was a guy who , wait, there was a jewish rabi indian, no that's not how it starts, well he ended up amish. And people stare at me with awe. There is no pun intended, just ignorance. Maybe I should come a comedian. "Hello Folks, damn this crowd is dead tonight, I guess Jeff Foxworthy opened tonight." Which is a good question, whatever happened to "You might be a redneck if?" I bet he finally figured out he was trash and no one found him funny anymore. Must suck to be rich and live in a trailor home and have a mullet. Hell if you want funny, watch me try to put all my clothes on in 6 sec before her parent walk in, now that's a site to see. Thank you goodnight. Now that you(the viewers) can comment on WASTEDLIFE.com post, things might get a little more interresting. Hell already people are calling each other gay.

Ziggi @ 08/10/2001 12:09:14 AM They Call Me King Tonight we had an eventful trip to Burger King. It was funny because we all came in as a group, but as soon as we got our food, we went to seperate corners of the place and talked across the room to each other. The people working had to have thought we were half crazy. Then I commented that I thought there was a little kid in their air ducts because water was dripping on me and I said the little slave boy was spitting on me. The manager came over and said, " I don't believe there is any little children in our air vents.", I said , "what about disgruntled employee's?" Well the conversation ended there, but we did leave with the prize we wanted. The Crowns. Yes each one of us, all 6 of us came out with our Crowns on top of our hats/heads. Driving down the strip with crowns on us blasting Metallica's King Nothing, got alot of looks. But is was worth the ride. I have come to the point that I only have a week left in this damn town. I really don't care what people think about me. If I want to look like a damn fool, well I will. And what is up with everyone saying someone is an asshole? Are they seriously an ass?- Heath qoute. That is a good question, and my answer is, I think everyone actually means to say that they are an ass clown or a ass pirate.

Ziggi @ 08/08/2001 06:57:44 PM Same Ol Same Ol Living life in the suburbs is a tough life. I'll tell you what, I don't go a day without someone asking me about the weather or something news related. This neighborhood sucks. And those damn kids riding their bicycles in my yard, oh they are gonna get it. Heck they even have my dog scarred.(note to oneself, buy land mines). Your probably thinking, you don't live in the suburbs, heck you don't even have kids riding bikes on Hwy 231. But I was thinking that in the future, I hope not to be one of those average joes. You know the type. The people who work 9-5, wake up and drink coffie and read the paper, come home after work and watch sportcenter while eating a TV dinner, and go to bed only to repeat the process. They live in their little house's with the pickett fence, have a dog, mow the yard, have a neighborhood with little kids riding bikes, all that boring stuff. I want anything but that. Sure you may be happy with that, but goo. It sounds like your going to be the next Ted Bundy. I want to live somewhere where people don't annoy you(no not death valley), where people's dogs dont use the restroom in your yard, where you dont have people walking down the street while your working saying, "Hey Mr. Bittel, how is your day?" Maybe I could be a hermit and live in the mountains of bush, maybe I could live underwater or on a boat. Heck maybe I could live in my car. Your probably also saying, what the hell is this all about and what are you getting too? Well ladies and gentlemen, I want to be famous so I don't have to live that kind of life. I am not meaning like super rich and snobby living with the high class, I am just saying I dont want to live with the normal people. It's just a dream I had, hell it'll probably be shot down when I end up working at Starbucks and living on Sesame Street(I always hated you big bird, why couldnt you be any other color than yellow, now oscar, he was a high class citizen).

Ziggi @ 08/06/2001 07:33:17 PM Old Faces(an actual somewhat serious post) Today I was looking in my old year books. I found the one from my freshman year. I glanced through it, and I remembered, "that was the best school year I have ever had". It was a year when I had no worries. I didnt give a rats ass what people though. I was lil bittel, Big Bittel's brother. No one fucked with me, his friends were my friends, they taught me how to party, play good guitar, and I only got ringed a few times by one certain asshole (NB). I was kinda sad because I remember it ending and my bro going off to college. I had to start all over again. I had no connections anymore. I had no good looking older chicks hugging me, wasnt put in a trashcan(which as looked highly upon if cool seniors did it as a joke), I was part of a crew. Well after pondering and putting the book away, I thought to myself," HaHA. Good riddens to OCHS cause I am now on my way back to being lil bittel." Sure it's like, your only looked at as the younger one, but you get benefits. For example, chicks want to hump ya, you get free beer, you get made fun of at times, you get your life threatened because you are a smart ass, you have people that are already COOL with ya. At least I am not going off to college scared off my ass because I dont know anyone. Hell I know a shitload of people. It is going to be a blast. So why was I so sad earlier. I think it was because I noticed all the fun I once had has been gone for nearly 3 years now. I have put up with crap and have been abused for everything I am capible of doing. 10th grade = King of Extreme , 11th grade = Wild and Crazy Ziggs , 12th grade = Guy who wasnt fucked with because we found out he could kick our ass's and was tired of being used for a nickname. Needless to say, I have a total of 12 more days left in this town. Then I am starting over again. Where people know my name, no not Cheers, but Murray. I plan on being successful with the help of a few ass whoopins. Maybe those damn digital ducks that I have been seeing from the powerbomb I suffered last thursday will go away, maybe my lip will lose that bump from aaron getting the nutcracker suite, maybe that lady at taco bell will stop singing in my damn ear before I break the intercom, maybe the mexicans at walmart will move to K-mart, maybe Blink-182 will actually become a good band(punk was cool back in the day), hell who knows. But All I hae to say is I am ready to get the hell outta town and fast. Anyone for doomsday?

Ziggi @ 08/04/2001 11:41:55 PM Stupid Products Ok well, lately I have been watching a lot of TV. It's strange because they only time I turn on the TV is on Monday Night for WWF. Other than that, it just sits there. However, I decided to see what was on and only to my suprise was an "INFO Mercial". The product, Blousant. Yes this magical cream or chemical(Raid)suposedly makes a womans Bust size increase. It goes into your breast and makes the growth process start all over again. What if guys wanted to use it? Would you end up like Bob on Fight Club with bitch tits? Would we start wearing the "Bro"(the guy bra)? I just think it is stupid, it's like that clear Pepsi shit or Kool Aid that changes colors. Who in the hell would think this shit actually works? Thats what plastic surgery is for. Then I change the channel to see another info mercial on some kind of Japonese Knife set. Only thing was is the guy advertizing was a White Boy and not a Japonese person. Hell he had no clue even what to show. He was just like, they are sharp. I was like, you are gay. Click. Next stop, the internal antenna. Now I have heard these actually work. But they dont tell you the side effects. Here listed Will cause brain cancer, sudden hair defects, hearing loss, unnatural growth in calf muscles, and makes you have night vision So people go out and buy it, only to find out the next day that their cell phone really wont work in an elevator, the lady who is smiling wasnt smiling cause she was happy it was because she farted, and the wave scrambler picture with the guys head is actually a baboons that they tested the product on. What ever happend to the awesome/funny info mercials like that thing with the old lady saying ,"I've fallin and I can't get up" and who can forget "Scratch Remover Plus - We can drop bricks on glass and it will remove the scratches, but wont fix the cracks and indention". Those were worth seeing during show breaks. Now they just feed us crap and expect us not to turn the channel. So I say to thee, Let my TV Go, or I will bust a move on ya Sucka SHAQ-Fu style.

Ziggi @ 08/02/2001 06:51:33 PM Robots,Go Bots, And a sack lunch Yes, I have officially gone brain dead today. Needless to say my internet has been down for 2 days so I have been sucluded from the world. My browsing capibilities were cut off and it was like pulling the plug on me. However, as you may notice, they are back. So whats on the agenda? Definately not anything that involves me being hit, electricuted, flogged, cut, or dealing with horrible TV sitcoms and bad actors. I was wondering today why women go into bathrooms in groups? Every girl does it and every guy doesnt(unless your gay) It's like here, hold my hand while I take a piss. I just dont get it, are women afraid that the Boogie man is going to be in the stall and get her, only for her good-looking friend to stand helpless and be killed also? Yes it is the mystery that needs to be unvailed today. Do they do kinky acts while in there? Do they discuss politics? I am just saying, when I or any other guy goes to the restroom, he goes alone, no talk inside, do your business, and get out. I dont care if Count Chocula is in there I'll kick his ass if he tries anything while I'm pissin. You just can't deprive a man his business when he gots to go. But women just seem to be scared shitless that if their friends dont come with them they are going to miss something that the friend will see, she is afraid of the toilet monster, it's that time of the month syndrom, or even has to make themselves pretty because they are self concious. All, I am asking is why in the hell you do it? That's all. But you keep it sooo secret that guys just can't know. Is there a secret meth lab in there that you and your groups share? Is it a top secret club that no guys are aloud? Well you know what? I think your just gay because you ladies make it all complicated just to take a piss. <> On other notes, I thought of something else. Charlton Heston is the president of NRA. Wasn't he once Moses? Real Version not in Bible. God-" Moses, go to Egypt and setth the people free." Moses - " With what this stupid stick?" God - "No you dumbth assth, cometh here and taketh this." Moses heads to Egypt goes to Pharoah. Moses -"Let my People go Pharoah!" Pharoah - "No! They will slave the land for me." Moses pulling out 357 Smithin Weson, "I said let my people go motha fucka before I cap your candy ass sucka." Bam Bam Bam.

Ziggi @ 07/31/2001 01:53:50 PM I Close My eyes to hear the sound of Someone screamin. Today I am here to talk about something that can be very desturbing to anyone who goes down on girls. Today I heard a story from a fellow employee about his night last night. He happened to meet a girl(an attractive one)at a bar last night. After a few drinks they went to his place, talked for a little bit, got his groove on, and then you know what happened next. Well as he was taking her pants off, there it was. No not male organ, not a kid, a CROTCH MULLET!!! The ungodly thing was shooting towards the left and right, it was a damn jungle. However the top was short and the bottom was long. Such a hidious thing. Just as about as hidous as Man, so just to say something to every female out there. Please do us a favor and shave somewhat. MULLETS are just gross especially when they are between your legs.

Ziggi @ 07/30/2001 12:01:44 AM I'm Already Dead, Burn an X in my head. Yes boys and girls, new music is UP!. Sure you might not tend to like it(I dont care, it tickles my fancy), but I would like to hear some responses of what you "the fans" would like to hear when you visit my site. Hell some people dont even know there is music even on here(people who dont turn on the speaker, that or have MP3's constantly playing). So far the poll is looking away from what I think the meat locker is. Man ruin all the fun everyone. Stupid meat locker. I know it is a Gay Club, that was my vote. But anywho. Thus I have thought today, what is with Wal-Mart and its over population of Hispanic Americans. I dont have nothing against them. I love workin with them. But when I go to Wal-Mart, no matter what time, I always see crowds of them stairing at my "red" hair when I walk in. What is your facination with me? Am I some sort of sexy bitch? Do I amuse you? I am not a piece of meat damnit. I am a psychopathic,parapalegic,white honkie,mean machine,bad mamma jamma, iatola of rockin rolla, son of a bitch. So leave me alone Felipe, Juan, Juan 2, Juan 3, and Robert. I just dont understand why you have to stand around at Wal-Mart at 3 in the morning speaking god knows what, while other people are doing business. Actually I am singling out a few guys I see their on a basis. I am not talking about the whole race. Just a few of ya. You just wait guys, I am going to come out Jet Lei style beat you with a stick of beef jerky, throw you through the produce stand(which I had to clean out 3 times today due to the lettice running out. Picture me carrying 60lbs of chopped lettice for 3 times today), and throw you in a shopping cart and head it toward a jet ski so you can get rope burn. Ah the humanity. Watch out cause the Whole Fn' Show aint takin it no more. Well me and my little friend Juan 7.

Ziggi @ 07/28/2001 11:49:06 PM The Birds, the Bees, and Elvis in a duffle bag Ok well tonight was a hell night at work, another 13hr day. But oh I can't wait cause August 15th is my last day. Are you ready for Doomsday? The era of awesomeness will be over, and all I have worked for will be worthless to me. Let's see. Oh yeah back to the title. I was talking to the hot chick at work who is pregnant who I think likes me(more than a friend, you know that type)anywho, we were talking about her having a baby. Thus I thought. I feel really sorry for the girl who is going to have my offspring. Seriously, can you see another Fucked up individual running around with one of those bouncing dog car dash heads running saying Horsemouth cotton moose pussy. Goo, it is just a sad day when my kids are beating the shit out of each other because of letting them watch Raw Is War on Monday night. Could you just see these kids? They will be taking their happy meals my wife buys them, throw the mcnuggets at oncoming cars and keep it only for the toy inside. It will be a grave day when that happens. And then comes when they are teenagers and I have to explain sex to them. Can you see a child walking up to a teacher saying, "I know what a clitorus is!" or " I have a pig benis". And god fears the day when I have a girl and she says, "daddy, I'm pregnant." Only to find out that the guy is a bald 45 yr old midget who lives in Brooklyn. Or when she comes home and says," dad, I dont like boys, I'm taking Cindy to Prom". Now people should understand my reasoning when I say, I hope I die young so I dont have to live to see what the hell is going to happen. So the moral of this post is, live your life to the fullest. Just do it Nike, and obey your thirst, Orange Juice and SKYY.

Ziggi @ 07/26/2001 12:51:13 AM The Talk Well, last night I had that talk. You know the one with your ex-girlfriend. Needless to say it wasnt pretty. I wanted to bitch slap her so bad, I even thought about pedigree'n her. I noticed however that everything is always pinned on the guy in the relationship. It doesnt matter if you treated her perfect, she still makes you think that it's all your fault. That is a load of monkey crap camel toe donkey dick. Well you know what, I hope you read this cause I know you look here daily. This is something I call the big FUCK YOU, and you gave bad head anyways. Ah retribution at it's best. Goo, now that's off my mind time to move on to bolder more versitile subjects. Hmmm, have you ever noticed whenever your driving those little crossing lights with the hands and little person on them. You know you only have 6 sec to get accross the road before it changes to dont' walk. Thats some bullshit. I bet millions of people get hit by cars because of the timer is so quick. It is just wrong. Man if I were an old person and that light changed, hell I'd be screwed because if I tried to run my hip would go out. So I am saying that you need to change the timer from 6 sec, to 7 sec. Yes, that extra sec could save lives. Not 6 , 7. I also strongly believe that wilderness animals should be able to wonder our city streets. It's not fair that they have to be stuck in shitsville while everyone is having fun in the city. Hell I mean even the mole people get to live in the city.

Ziggi @ 07/25/2001 02:12:53 PM ??? Today I am in search for someone I have never seen, heard of, heard from, have no clue anything about him, but I need to be inquired on any info I can find. No it is not the Easter Bunny, Some dude on a sidewalk with a brown bag, or that guy who works with me that I still dont know his name and I call him Azeeb. I am in search of my roommate at Murray State. So far the only details I have is his name(which I wont reviel on here) and where he lives. I have no clue if he has an email address, a phone, a computer, anything... It's like I am looking for my shoe that I have still not gotten back from whoever thought it was funny and took it 2 weeks ago. I would like to have it back you drunk bastards. Anyways, Here is my shout out to ya. IF YOU ARE ROOMING in REGENTS 421, please email me, or talk to me on my IM name CAMBODIA101Proof. Thank you and are you ready for doomsday?

Ziggi @ 07/24/2001 12:00:21 AM Commotion Etc Etc I wonder sometimes in life why in the hell people find me offensive. I mean sure I am a spitfire at mouthing, but I am always joking because if I were not joking I step up to the plate. It's like I live the life of a Wrestling Sitcom at times. Your probably wondering, "what are you talking about now?" Well the past few days on WASTEDLIFE.com it seems like I have been having a feud but all in all its a bunch of gay trash talk back and forth as a joke. So that brings you up to date. Now if I were to go up to a person and say "Your the ugliest person I met in my life." Most likely they are going to be offended and get in my face. I understand that...All in all the convo is dead and life moves forward cause all is gravy. Anywho my life likes to have twist and turns. I can't wait till I become successful one day and look back at my enemies and say, "Ha HA HA, I own you know." " Or ha ha ha, I had sex with your girlfriend and she liked ever bit of it." It'll be the shit. I just have to become rich first though, that or become a rock star. What would it be like to be rich/famous? Well first thing I am buying is a House with a McDonalds fun slide in it(ball pit included) Then I am going to add a room that has a trampampolien floor and rubber room walls, so I could bounce around and knock the shit out of myself. After I get all that stuff done I plan on buying a Chevelle Supersport 71'. Then I am going to buy a monopoly board so I can practice owning hotels/motels and running the streets. On that note: The Monopoly Game at McDonalds SUCKS. Every damn time I look behind those little stickers it says INDIANA AVE. Well you know what, INDIANA AVE. Sucks goat because I have 15 of them. Why I can't get Boardwalk I dont know. I get frustrated and now I wont eat at McDonalds for a month till it's over. I would like to take old money bags and beat the snot out of him. "So you wont give me a million dollars eh punk? Well here is a nice foot up your ass." I wonder these things on a daily basis. Where am I going to be in the next 10 yrs? Will I be something, or will I end up being a manager at Red Lobster(hell no). Am I going to get married within the next 8 yrs? Is she going to be faithful? Is she going to be Jewish? Am I going to be remembered when I die? Are they going to laugh at me? Are they going to put that doorbell on my tombstone that I requested? It just baffles me and I dont know what to do. Maybe I should just go and lock myself in Denny's broom closet(yes they have one)for a century and come out and say, damn Owensboro still sucks.

Ziggi @ 07/23/2001 12:28:56 AM Oh Hell Yeah! RVD! RVD! New HARDCORE CHAMPION. Take that WWF. ECW! ECW! What a spectacular night it was as Rob Van Dam kicked Freaky Colored hair queer JEFF HARDY. Vandaminator right in the face with a steel chair off the stage. Now that's what I call Hardcore. And good ol Stone Cold Steve Austin turned on WWF and joined team WCW/ECW. Wow, just crazy. Well enough of that. So what is going on in my life? Hmm, I thought about letting my hair grow out so I could Fro it. Have the whole 70's disco look. So far it's starting off well. Maybe if I keep it up, I can hide my wallet, a gun, pair of pliers, a womans bra, some fury animals, and a years supply of cottage cheese in there. I really think I need a hair cut bad. Just the thought of having a Fro makes me want to go Gangsta and shoot up a liqour store with Snoop. Man I would be off da hook.Word. You maybe thinking, What is this he is talking about? Is it those damn dirty apes again, or is it just the hair talking. Frankly my dear, I just dont give a damn. Talk about a nightmare, I just think people's hair is pitiful these days as retro is coming back for some reason. Maybe it's the idea that hey, it's the year 2001 lets bring back everything from disco to hairspray, to spam-oh wait that never died, it just got put back on the shelves cause they never ran out of it. If people only ate those little weiners in a can.

Ziggi @ 07/21/2001 12:21:56 AM Return of the Meat Locker Yes, it is true. Today Tboe and I ventured to McClean County this afternoon to kill some time before Moby got off work. I had no clue where we were going we just had to lose track of time. Needless to say, the first thing I noticed was Welcome to McClean County: We mean business.(isnt that lame, that or you just cant take them seriously when you put that on a sign). Then out of the corner of my eye, there she be. THE McClean COUNTY MEAT LOCKER! I about shit my pants. Boom there is was. Ah the memories of pondering if it was a gay night club, a place where they mass produced hotdogs and spam, or just an empty creepy building. I just have never figured out this shocking thing to man. It is still a wonder of what the place could be. Maybe it is the meeting place of the Sasquatch, el Chupacabra, the mole people, slush puppy, lamb chop, and all those other evil creatures that make children not want to sleep at night. I just dont know. Well, I would like to hear some output on this theory maybe you all could think of something to send me, I might have a poll pretty soon about it. In the meantime I have to hit the sack, I have a meeting at 9 in the morning. What kind of business has a meeting at 9 in the morning. Sounds lame to me. Especially when its about "being touchy feely at work" and "???", damnit if I want to go in the closet with one of my fine hostess's for 10 min why cant I? Wait maybe I have said too much...Goodnight

Ziggi @ 07/19/2001 11:37:11 PM THE MOLE PEOPLE Out of the darkness of the underworld comes something that only hell can uproot. These creatures have been blamed for the past 2 years by me at Red Lobster for stealing food, liqour from the bar, and even tips. This people of some sort live under the ground, mating with eathworms to offspring children with no eyes, the horrors of man cannot describe these beings cause they have never been seen. They are, THE MOLE PEOPLE. For the past 3 days, Red Lobster has been digging inside the place saying they are trying to fix the water line. It's all a cover up. They persuade you to do things in the middle of nowhere and when you least expect it, whamm. They take your wallet, your shoes, and even your pets(thats where you little fluffy went). I have yet to find one of these "mole people" but I have my eyes peeled. Maybe the worm people and the mole people will come up from the sewers and show their selves only to be put back into the ground by scarred shitless of Razor Motor scooter mainia. As you may have read, WASTEDLIFE did not sell itself. THANK GOD. Those mole people were getting closer by the minute. I am happy. It's good to know the right decision was made. Have had a long day trying to make the right decision and you may have gotten the message from my post on there that I wanted to sell, but its hard for me to be sarcastic on the internet like I can be in person... Anywho I have to get back to drinking, looking at guys good looking big breasted girlfriends and suck, I mean such. See ya on the flipside.

Ziggi @ 07/18/2001 03:32:33 PM Its a Sad Day A tragedy has happened today. Our ever loving mascott CHUD was killed. My little sister decided yet again to TOUCH MY SHIT. I am thinking of breaking all her shit in order to get revenge, that or never speak to her again. All she ever does is break my things wheither it is crashing the computer, spilling cokes etc on my guitars, or KILLING CHUD. I am very sad right now, and she needs to be exicuted. I might just be piss mean to her for the next month I have left in this town. I will have my vengence on her. I just cant take it anymore. CHUD DIDNT DESERVE THIS. His head fell off as did his middle finger. That BITCH. Yet she has no remorse, no apollogy. Well she will be sorry when I erase her AOL screen name. Then she will be ultimately screwed. HAHAHAHA. Chuds Eulogy: Chud lived a very awesome life. Chud was born June 18 2001. Chud did everything he could for the homeless, oppressed and even those starving ethiopions. He every so often would lay a piece of bread under the couch so the slave children would have some food to eat. Chud was nice to everyone. Chud was the little yellow guy that was always ever so outgoing. Chud was brutaly murdered July 18 2001. Nether the less, Chud will always be remembered in our hearts, minds, and in our pants. In other notes got an email from Heath that was pretty funny. Enrique Aquilar Canchola, a 42-year-old Mexican national, hides in the seat of a vehicle, that according to government officials, was trying to smuggle him into the United States from Mexico at the San Ysidro border crossing in San Ysidro, Calif., June 7, 2001. According to Immigration and Naturalization officials, the incident is part of growing trend of illegal immigrants cramming themselves into intricate and potentially deadly compartments. (AP Photo/Immigration and Naturalization The picture didnt come up right on this page for some odd reason, but why in the hell would Mexicans hide in seats now or days, that is just pathetic, you might as well give yourself up you stupid ass clowns.

Ziggi @ 07/16/2001 10:55:10 AM Ahhhh Poop Well, I probably pissed alot of female viewers yesterday buying putting up my post on the WNBA. Well, that's one persons opinion. You all have opinions about things that I probably would argue about, but straight up that shit sucks. It's like seeing two people snorting pixie sticks for an hour. It just gets boring. Not to get me wrong, cause I have gotten 18 emails from loyal female viewers. And I know what you want to hear. So here it is, "I'm ...... IT DOESNT MATTER WHAT YOU THINK!" PLAY OR GO HOME! Anywho, yes I have been having some trouble with my posting abilities. This site is all manual posting so I have to do it all by hand, but on WASTEDLIFE all I have to do is post on BLOGGER. So it takes alot of time to do this on my site. Needless to say, I will have more post when school starts because I will have more time due to not having to be at RED LOBSTER 24/7. I only have 4 more weeks left. Then the legacy is over. My reign of the front of the house will be over. Kinda sad, NOT. Just to break free from the place will be sort of a relief. Hmm, well I talked about the CAR FULL of midgets on WASTEDLIFE already, Talked about SCARY MOVIE 2 and KISS OF THE DRAGON on there, what more can I say that I have done. We talked about throwing twinkies at cars again, however the idea fell through due to that fact that we can get arrested now. Sucks to be of the legal age. Oh yeah NEW PICTUREs are UP and I will have a story about a local CLERK who tried to screw me over, dont worry the bitch is going down.

Ziggi @ 07/14/2001 02:04:19 PM WNBA = SHIT Ok well just moments ago my brain lost all thinking ability and concienceness. I turned on the TV to see the WNBA. I have never watched a game before so I was like I might give it a shot. Needless to say, it was the GAYEST, I'll say it again, GAYYYYESSSSTTT thing I have ever seen aired on TV. Within the 1st quater the score was 8 - 12. I have seen pre-schoolers play ball better. Jesus, half the women on the team were the ugliest women I have ever seen. I could have sworn Janet Reno was their coach. I watched some Shaniqua something girl try to shoot a 3 pointer 13 X only to miss it every single shot. The sad thing is almost every shot she was wide open. Pitiful, hell I play Center but I can still make a 3 pointer within 5 shots. I just wanted to watch those ugly things get hurt. They travel, they walk, they foul out every 5 minutes, they are the most pathetic ball players I have seen. They get payed for this. No wonder it comes on on Sat. at about 1 o'clock. Usually at that time people are at work, outside, or sleeping. Well dont come inside to catch one of these games. I will tell you this, it is not worth it. I feel I might sign my little sister to play for one of the teams, at least she plays ball like a man. I could get some monkeys on the court and they could at least score more points a quarter than what I witnessed. You could put a blind man with a stick out there and I bet he would at least put some effort in the game. Mental note - If the NBA ever trys to make a co-ed B-Ball league, please keep them on the bench or dont pass to them. Ladies, I love ya, you can drive a man crazy, no offense, but if your going to play a sport play Softball or Soccer cause I know you can kick ass in those but when it comes to basketball, keep it to Black Guys and Tall White dudes...

Ziggi @ 07/12/2001 08:21:49 PM Garage Sale? My whole house is a fuckin wreck because we are holding a "Garage Sale" tomorrow. To be honest with you, it is basically - getting rid of shit that doesnt work for about 25 cents - $3.50. Iwas bushwacked by some of the shit we were getting rid of. For example, Jarod Tucker and Aaron Roach bought a picture of an old man with a pitch fork and his wife for 25 cents. What a bargan. It is going straight up in their dorm room besides all the beer and naked women posters. We have everything from couch's, bikes, porno movies(not really), etc. The only bad thing is that I have to get up at 5:30 in the morning to help them set up. Goo it's going to sucks. Ok, well I wish them the best of luck, but the only bad thing is, when they cleaned out my old room, the couch went too. You know what that means, all the Slave Children are homeless now. Who will hear their silent crys at night? Who will wake up to hear the slave music? The Crack of the Whip, the uncle bens rice they have put all their time and effort into picking, the memories. It is quite sad around here right now. I guess I will have to find some new slave children to hide somewhere so at night they can come out and dance for me. Hmm... Maybe I have said to much, or maybe I have said to little. I have to run now, I have some business to take care of, damn washing machine...

Ziggi @ 07/11/2001 03:23:52 PM It all comes out Ok well I have been a little lazy the past few days with the site. Sorry about the lacking in content. It's this new MARSHALL AMP. God it is the shit. I have fallin in love with it and I cannot be disconnected from it. Its like having a third arm. WASTEDLIFE is still down. Which is a shame. I want to post but only people who post can see what the others have post. So for the time being I am going to wait, eat my corn flakes and drink my beer. Mmmmm cornflakes and beer. Here is a story - A man in Flordia wrestled a shark to land to get his nephews arm out of the shark(which it had just bitten off in the water). The man literally beat the shit out of it and the coast people shit it in the head ending its life. The arm was retrieved and it was sown back on the boy. Now here is what I am wondering, "Why in the hell would you shoot the shark in the head after such a thing?" You know that boy was probably kicking it or poking it in the eye. It was the sharks natural nature to bite the boys arm off. He probably deserved it. I know if I was in shark infested waters I bet they would be pissed if someone was tresspassing. And how do they know it did it in the meaning of fairness. Maybe it was hungry. I know if I was craving for a little kids arm I might bite one off. And finally, how did they even know if it was the kids arm? It could have been some surfer or someone who pissed off the shark before's arm. Jeese, I mean how many people are attacked by sharks a day? I would say at least 2. So evening those odds, I bet the attached some dudes arm to him. Now the boy is going to look like a freak and have one arm way 7 inchs longer than his other and he will look like a monkey. He will walk the streets and they will say, "Look its the Freak." or children will run and hide and say, " AHH its the elephant man." or possibly they will say , " LOOK ITS PATRICK EWING!". Ok well sorry Patrick. I know you dont deserve all the ripping I do on you. But damnit boy, you could be in planet of the apes. You have such a resemblence of a red assed baboon. Ok, to conclude, if your a little kid and you feel like swimming in the ocean and being mean to the marine life, you DESERVE to be ATTACKED/EATEN/KILLED/HUMPED. You should know better. Lets just learn our lesson, next time you want to swim, keep it in your olympic pool in your backyard because I know your family is rich if they have the money to take you to Flordia and have your arm reattached. You should have just gotten a Bionic Arm so you could fight the Nazi's and save the world from a nuclear threat. Damn kids. They will never learn, its those razor motor scooters and Chinpokomon that has deluted their minds.

Ziggi @ 07/10/2001 02:40:33 PM What would you do for a Klondike Bar? I saw the interresting Klondike bar commercial yesterday and it brought to mind the question, "What would you do for a Klondike Bar?" Well, what the hell would you do for one? I probably would smash a person in the face with a brick for one. These are the parallels of the world that just cant be answered. Would you have sex with a person for a Klondike Bar? I know I would. Would you eat a dead bird for a Klondike Bar? Would you jump off a mountain into a flaming pit of tar babies? It just doesnt end. So why do they ask such a stupid question? I guess we'll never know. It's kinda like those tootsie roll pops and their "how many licks" comercial. Well damnit I can bite the mofo once and be done with it. While it takes that stupid Owl 3 licks and a bite. I think he is probably endangered anyways and I think they should eliminate him. GOOO....

Ziggi @ 07/09/2001 12:26:19 AM Halloween can be anynight We have found something extremely fun and hard to do. While drinking some "Johnny Walker Black Label" I came up with the ultimate idea. With a bunch of other drunks we got into the closet. Low and behold, there they were. Halloween mask. We had a Veloca Raptor mask, an old man with missing teeth mask, some sort of alien, a alf mask, and a scream mask. So off to the streets we went. Knocking door to door asking for candy. The first house was a trip. The guy looked at us like," What the fuck?" "Trick or Treat" , "? its July you dipshits" " Where is the candy?" " BAM(door shuts) So on to the next house we went this time an old lady answered the door. "Trick or Treat", " is it already that time again?", " Here you go wait a minute", She came back with 5 banannas. "You all be careful." We ended up throwing those bannanas on roofs of houses and in mailboxs. Now here is a ?, why in the hell is it that everytime you go trick or treating, someone always gives you either a pencil or fruit? They should know that it is going to be dismantled in some sort of manner. What I dont understand is why people give kids stupid shit these days. You all know they want sweet tarts and snickers. Hell I am going to be smart when I am an adult. I am going to be the cool man who gives out condoms to the wee little ones and vaginal walls. "Practice safe sex kids". Ok well back to the story, so on we moved when we came to a house with a big dog. This wasnt a normal dog. It looked frickin mean. I dont think mny ALF mask went over well with it, the dog about jumped the fence to get me. Needless to say we made it to the door, alive, and rang the door bell. Not only did some guy come up in his boxers but he thought we were Jehova's witness's. He told us that if we said anything he would kick our ass and call the police. We left in an instant and threw an apple at the dogs pegging it right behind the ear. It was cool. We all got tired of walking because, 1) we all smoke and have no athleticism anymore, 2) we were pretty trashed and we wanted to get back before we got lost and ended up at someones house that we didnt know waking up in a bathtub, and 3) It was at least 80 degrees out last night and those mask were getting hot. To conclude, Halloween is something that can be celebrated whenever the hell you want to get off your lazy ass, put on a mask, and walk down the street. So I say to thee, GET CANDY or Get HAMMERED.

Ziggi @ 07/08/2001 12:09:53 AM THE MONKEY MAN IS BACK Today is a historic night in NBA2K1. Yes The Monkey(Patrick Ewing) is back on the KNICKS!!!. Man is he dominating the low post with his long arms and red assed baboon lips. What a key player he is. I am for sure he will get player of the game. Not only is he tall, hairy, old, has a receeding hairline, but he has this look in his eyes saying," man I wish I could win a ring this year." That enough is intimidating Your probably wondering, " What the hell are you talking about?" Well, I have no idea, it just sounded good to say. Monkey Paw Back Scratcher. Well Patrick Ewing could very well be the next Michael Jordan. I have never seen such a player that is truely monsterous in the beyond the free throw line. If every team had a Patrick Ewing there would be enough compitition to go around. To be frankly honest with you, Patrick Ewing is just a big dumb monkey. He scares me and gives me nightmares when I sleep at night. I mean waking up to see a big hairy #33 in your bed with you isnt a pleasant thought. GOOO. I threatened to break his legs but his damn monkey arms flipped him straight out of bed and out the window before I could say SHAZAAM! So if you see Patrick Ewing running around somewhere, please notify the NBA so they can get man with the Crappy Jump Shot Back.

Ziggi @ 07/07/2001 01:12:10 AM People Are Strange Well, I was thinking today, I wonder what it would be like to work in a convienent store at late hours. It has to be the coolest job you can have. You have people coming in at 3 in the morning wanting to buy smokes, beer, left over pizza, condoms, and everything else under the sun. I went into the one by my house(Shell Station) at about 2 AM. When I went through the door, the guy was asleep on the counter. I could have just walked in and taken whatever the hell I wanted. However, I am not like that and I do have morals. So I grabbed me a pack of smokes, laid $3.75 on the counter and left. I am suprised the guy didnt get robbed. But you do have to think, man I am working at 2 in the morning, I need sleep. Most of your customers are high, drunk, or just plain ugly. If the company was smart, they could hire highly intellegent monkeys to run the counter at that time of the night. Sure it would probably masterbate and throw feeces, but at least it would be reliable. I would love to work at a CITGO. I would be throwing the old breakfast bizkits across the store, probably drink free mountain dews, and for the most part eat all the Slim Jims I could handle. Maybe I could see some hot chicks at those hours...nah, most of them are in bed or having sex at that time. Actually, I would not want to be a CLERK, I have seen the movie(loved it)but it's just not the side of work for me. I am working my ass off to get the new SLIPKNOT cd off of SONGSPY before it somes out. Which I am not having so good of luck. I downloaded something which ended up being RAIMSTIEN or whatever that german bands name is, but I could tell it was not Slipknot. I just dont understand why people name songs under slipknot or mc hammer or whatever and you get stuck with some sort of gay shit. Gooo. On other notes, if your going to do a "Nutcracker Suite"(doing a neckbreaker forward with a knee drop on the groin) on someone who has you in a headlock, beware of you mouth cause you might bite your lip. I did and I have a damn cold sore due to it. Tomorrow we are filming another wrestling film. Yes we are going to have some really cool shit going down. Hopefully some tables broken, some conchairto's, and even a dog cage match. If I can find that llama I might even have a mascott like Jake "the Snake" Roberts did or something to that nature. Also soon enough there will be more picture to the pic page however ANGELFIRE is still being GAY...

Ziggi @ 07/06/2001 01:39:36 PM NOthing But Trouble Tonight has been filled with stupid ignorant things yet again. I feel as if nothing gets better as I move on daily. I am still awaiting for the "Marshall" to get here so I can record my songs. Goo. It sucks cause nothing interresting happened tonight. I mean, at least something could have fallin from the sky such as a bird, or a bird without a head. I just cant wait until I get to Murray. I despise this town more and more daily. Maybe Godzilla will attack and blow this place up. Hmmm.... On other notes, ANGELFIRE YET AGAIN IS GIVING ME UPLOADING PROBLEMS. I will just keep sending hate mail. Well here is what you have been waiting for, something with substance. Somthing that is taking the world be storm. It's those damn Razor Motor Scooters. I just have to say, I cannot wait till a little kid gets hit by a car on one of those things. I mean, damn, they believe they seriously have the right of way when they are peddling along.It is rediculous. I about hit a group of them over by Tamerack Rd. Those punks came out of nowhere. But I figure I scarred the shit out of them, blasting Pantera, wearing my hat backwards, giving them the stare of death, and honking furiously with a wooden spoon shaking in the air. I just want to get one of those scooters and get someone to ramp over a car into a ditch. It would fulfill my needs of wanting something cool to happen. I hope I see in the paper ," Factory Recall on Razor Scooters Due to Improper Braking Unit". Thus, cleaning the streets of 10 yr olds who wear Slipknot shirts and have 9 piercings. I am thinking of buying one just so I can smash it or sell it to one of our wasted youths not telling them that some of the saftey parts are missing. Oh yeah, I was saying on WASTEDLIFE earlier how I never win "under the cap" games. Well guess what, I finally WON! 7 months of being a loser and BANG, I win. However I lost the cap, so I guess I am a loser again. I bet I know who has it now. That damn Sasquatch thats who. Anywho, I am off to bed. I have to come up with some interresting shit because my life just keeps on getting stupider and less entertaining daily...hmmm, I got it, Fish SANDWICH's For the Ladies.

Ziggi @ 07/04/2001 01:59:26 PM The SILENCE IS BACK Well after crucial hours of sending hate mail and various CHUD threats, the problem is fixed. What can you say, well I can say two slices of bread and a prarrie dog. Hummm, today is the 4th. Today we celebrate blowing shit up with highly explosive means. What else is better than a cold beer, pyro things, and wild women. It was thinking last night while starring at a swimming pool about how much Jello you could put into one of those things. Which brought to mind, what ever happend to Bill Cosby and the Jello Pudding commercials? It's been a long time since I have seen that old bastard persuade kids to eat his stupid chocolate pudding and other various colors and flavors. Man Cosby should have stuck with his show and thats that. He was cool and all and I give him props but damn to sell your soul to the commercial world. What a punk. I bet he never even ate his own pudding. Its just like that old guy from the quacker oats commercials. You know that guy was cenial and hated that shit. He is probably dead now. And I ask myself, that is all he will be remembered for, Quacker Oats. Ok well enough of the ranting and raving. "7" will be on here soon to download. I would like to hear comments from the viewers. I have to get my Marshall set up in here so I can play it on electric. Anywho, I have to head out to the party. Naked Chicks, Beer, and Weed. - Well I will be partaking in the first two, instead of weed I will be doing hits of crisco and cool whip.

Ziggi @ 07/01/2001 11:59:11 PM Schitzophrinic. Well I am proud to hear that Heath is getting to see people have SEX in his pool. Wow, I am so glad I never went swimming in the thing. HAHAHA. Just think, you want to take a dip in, however you wonder what kind of fat beings and such have gotten off in there. Man I thought that pool water looked a little funny, besides the floating seamen and pubic hairs in it. Well, let me just say, I am really really bored. I moved upstairs today. No longer will I linger of Mildew in my pores. Ah, fresh air. I can feel it now. No more scary dreams, just wet ones.(just joking)Oh yeah, you know how I had a dream that involved Jenna Jameson, something else and a Giant Panda, well it so happened that it wasnt a Giant Panda, it was that damn Llama and the Billy Goat king. Gooo. I woke up to a cold chill. I say, "I'll see you in hell you damn dirty mammals!" In other news, I watched a guy drive his motor cycle through a glass door tonight over by the Executive Inn. Dude, it was probably one of the coolest things I have seen in a while. I was puzzled. I wasnt sure if the guy was drunk , or breaking into the store. It kinda seemed like something Arnold would do from Terminator. Also you might have read my post today on WASTEDLIFE about the fireworks we bought. I not only blew up a mailbox, a beer bottle(dont worry it was empty), a frog, but I also blew up 15 G.I. Joes. Execution of helpless toys is sooo fun. Man, Hawk got what he deserved as did Serpentor. HAHAHAHA. We had a pretty good crator and a good turnout of viewers. Afterwards we sang the national anthem and gave a solute to the fallen heros. I love July. July = Fireworks, Naked Chicks, Cold Beer on Hot Days, and Less days left in this Godforsaken Town.

Ziggi @ 07/01/2001 12:02:05 AM The Unvailing. Today is the day everyone has been waiting for. No its not thanksgiving, easter, a jewish holiday, or the day the new NSNC Cd comes out(bunch of homo useless no talent boy band). Today view the splendors of horror. See the ungodly structure of the beast. Watch as people quiver in his aweness and horrible paintbrush drawing because I ran out of film on my camera and I dont have a scanner. He is not human, he has no sex. He is CHUD! I pissed my pants just glancing at the close to Pokemon/Teletubby/Bambi on Speed/Creature from the Tarpits of Indiana, looking species. I just dont know what to say. Oh yeah, I AM NOW posting on WASTEDLIFE.Com also. So check me out. I am sooo Hyped it is an ERA of AWESOMENESS. Well tonight we went again to GOLFLAND. Man did we whack those balls good. I have never seen some of those balls fly so far with great agility. We even hit a guy tonight. He fell to the mighty blow of the golfball crashing into his leg. Sucks to be him. HAHA. However I am thinking I might feel bad , nah, it felt good to watch him fall to the ground. It just shows that we are not a group to be messed with. We Are the MASONVILLE MAFIA. We are sorta like Fight Club with the only exception that instead of beating the shit out of each other, we drink each other to a drunken stooper. Nah we arent that bad, just evil. Well, off to bed, I have to catch up on a dream I had that included a beach towl, Jenna Jameson, a cold beer, and a giant panda.

Ziggi @ 06/30/2001 01:40:11 AM I see the snowflakes glistenin on the trees. The Sun no longer sets me free, I feel the snow flakes freezen me - Of course if your not a Black Sabbath fan you would have no clue what that was I just said. Anywho, I am pissed off again. I hate ANGELFIRE. DAMN THE UPLOAD BUTTON. CHUD is mad. He wants to throw feeces. Not one happy mamma jamma. Well on the bright side I ended tonight with a shot of Jose Cuervo. It has just been one of those gay nights. I wasted my damn time listening to friends bitch about girlfriends and how they dont know what to do, listen to situations with friends with girls(you get the picture), and watch a bunch of girls get high and giggle all night. I would have had more fun watching a catepiller get smashed by a brick. This summer has sucked and I am tired of going to the snow cone place every damn night. To be honest, the snowcones are not that great. We need beer flavored snow cones. I mean they got ever other flavor. And what the hell is a Dude Love. Damnit that is old(his name is Mick Foley now jackass.) But the worst flavor "Wedding Cake". Now why in the hell would you like to have a snow cone that taste like cake. That is just like putting out snowcones that taste like meat(a.ka. Spam, Hamburger, Cat). Ok well basically my rant is OWENSBORO - YOU CAN SUCK IT! Cause look at the news I got today Adam, Sorry it has taken me so long to get back to you but here you go. You are assigned to white college rm 420. As far as a job goes, I will speak to the computer lab people to see what openings they have and I will let you know. Hope your summer is going well and looking forward to seeing you in the fall. Mike Now, your probably thinking,"Dude a heshers dream rm 420", but I say, Sweet. If I am drunk I can always remember my room number. Ok this is to Craig, Scott, Tim, and whoever else is starting the band. GUYS I AM SERIOUS HERE. YOU CANT JUST TAKE AN INSTRUMENT AND EXPECT TO BE AWESOME. It takes alot of time and practice. I have been playing for almost 8 years now. I have still yet to master my skills. So play around with what you all get, and when I get there I can HELP. I can play about anything with strings, sticks, and keys. Also, guys I would love to start posting soon. I know Brett is in the same city as you are, I know he can buy you rounds of beers, but I can give you a hint on where some buried treasure is. Take a left by Log Cabin, then drive half a quarter mile to KFC, then do a U-Turn at the stop light. Run into the gas station and flush the toilet 6 times till it overflows. Then run out , jump on the giant pink elephant and ride it to Wal-Mart. From there go to ale 22 and Boom. The X marks the spot. Off to the place I call the Dungion so I can get my eternal rest. I will be awaiting WASTEDLIFE.

Ziggi @ 06/29/2001 12:01:46 AM Furious... Damn uploader on Angelfire. I was going to put CHUD up today. But all day the damn company says, Sorry about the inconvience but we logged that you tried to upload the picture. I am like, well whoop di frickin doo. You can kiss my ass you stupid piece of monkey crap. CHUD is here crying right now. He told me he was going to eat them. I told him not to get out of hand and then CHUD went and smashed a window. I told him to smoke a cig and it will all be better in the morning. Hmmm. Well I will be back in a little bit to try again. In the mean time, I am very excited about WASTEDLIFE.com adopting me and Brett! Bring out the naked women and cold beer, cause damnit there is going to be some very interresting things going down. Oh yeah and to HEATH. Delete some of your Email jackass. Your mailbox is full and I cant nor anyone else send you mail. Be back in a bit... (1:09) Ok well I am back. Still no CHUD UPLOAD.... Well what happened to me today. My CD PLAYER FIZUCKED up and I had to buy a frickin new one. Clarion are the shit. It has a cool BLUE SCREEN!!! Other than that I played Jet Grind Radio today, WWF No Mercy, Soul Calibur, ate a pizza, played Guitar, went into town, ran over a man laying in the middle of the road, got chased by a donkey with horns, and bought a wheel chair with old woman included. Well the last few are not true. It has been a pissy day, filled with Craft Mac and Cheese, Judge Judy(who actually is Janet Reno with a mask), and me having a glow stick. Went to go Golfing at GOLFLAND but the bastards would not let us in,"we are closing" I was like,"well we are golfing". He was like,"we close at 10" I said "ITS FUCKIN 9:30". Then Steve Dave told me off and I smashed him over the head with a steal chair. WWF pays off. No actually we got mad and told them to kiss our ass. I mean we go there almost everyday, supply them with a shitload of business, however we are horrible golfers(I'm good but I like to try to hit the pro shops roof), but that is no reason not to let us golf. So I SAY, SCREW YOU GOLF LAND, and your stupid driving RANGE. We will take our business to the NASKARTS where they let us wreck people purposely and drink beer etc... I am also thinking about going on strike from Red Lobster. Those bastards would not let my friend David Rudd- Who works there- take a leak in the bathroom. Now that can cause Erectile Disfunction. He could be scarred for life. If you gotta go, you gotta go. So instead he pissed on the something, or I think he did. His pants weren't wet. I still say, ITS COOL TO PEE YOUR PANTS and too PEE on other people who piss you off.

Ziggi @ 06/28/2001 02:11:23 AM Fat Albert Quote Heath,"Well, going to bed now. I've got to get up early tomorrow. Later. Oh, do you think Fat Albert became Bill Cosby? Or do you think he turned to a life of crime and fat crack whore pimpin'? Fat Albert in mink coat. The dude in the sock cap could be his right hand man. I don't know, got F.A. on the brain." Now this was ingenius for something for me to write about. To start out, Fat Albert was really Christopher Wallis(a.k.a) Notorious B.I.G. So that sums up what happend to Fat Albert, Albert + Rap Music = Biggy Smalls + Gunshot = Dead Fat Man. Now for Dumb Dewy, the sock cap tainted his skin and he became known as Jamiriquai. So he virtual insainitied his dumb ass to success. The rest of the gang died at the early ages of 13, 14 and so on through gang violence, drug addictions, and sexually transmitted diseases. Except the girl with the frog, the frog became a famous video game character that hopped across traffic. However, she tried to cross traffic and was hit by a semi in 1990. But you have to look at it this way, as children, we all wanted to be in the Junk Yard Gang. I mean, look at all the fun you can have in the junkyard. Playing Instruments out of cardboard box's, matress springs, and even old tires and garbage cans. I sooo wanted to be the Cymbol player. However that stupid tall kid played for them, but was drafted to the NBA by the 76'ers back in the day and was replaced by a robot from Lost In Space. Well, Charles Barkley, your doing good now, I am proud of you. I would have liked to see the lost episodes where Fat Albert and the Gang robbed a Citgo or a Liquor store, I am sure they did. All the needles in the Junk Yard, I am sure they shot up with Angel Dust all the time. I think Dumb Dewy was a pot head. You can just tell by his speaking abilities. Anyways, away from the FAT. I bought a cool CD today. I have heard of them alot within the past 5 months and had to check them out. The Union Underground is the shit. I love their CD. However buying it made me broke. I have to wait till Sunday before I can have money in my wallet. But it will be spent on a new guitar amp. I cant wait. Hmmm...Jerimiah was a Bullfrog, he was a good friend of mine, GOOOOOO! what the hell was that. Well at least it wasnt something by Queen or the Village People. Oh I yelled obscenities at Ms.Kitty today. Stupid man bitch. I let that shemale that if she ever came neat me I was gonna beat the living shit out of her. Something about that Transvestite that just makes you feel tainted. CHUD WILL BE COMING SOON... I am thinking of putting a counter to count the days down till he appears...You'll all be satisfied by this one.

Ziggi @ 06/27/2001 12:53:11 AM Eventful Day Ok well, to start off, well I think my whole summer list came true. Today, I worked on some kick ass guitar riffs, that could possibly become a awesome song(thank god for ZAKK WYLDE and BLACK LABEL SOCIETY). Also I met a hot girl, who apparently dug me. I didnt see a guy riding a unicycle, kissing midgets, or the occasional man on fire. However, I did see a motor cycle hit a car tonight head on. Dude it was a mess. I think the dude is dead. There is no way in hell he survived. But i give a moment of Silence to the dude..... It's just strange how life can flash before someones eyes. Withing a second your gone. Yet, everyone morns over you. Its ironic that death is such a tragedy. I guess this scared me enough that I probably will never get on a motor cycle again. It's just the beggining...at last. In other news, I dont have an on campus job yet. I am awaiting Mike Young to email me back. And I still have no clue what dorm I am in. GOOOO... Maybe I will get stuck in a cardboard box, or maybe be stuck sleeping under an overpass. I have slept in a box before. It's not too comfortable. I dont recommend it to anyone. Well the jagged edges on it didnt help me at all. Ok well we need to brighten up this place with some humor. Hmmm let me think. I thought the whole Mike Tyson's Don Flamingo kick was a trip. I am still getting a kick off of him. Your probably wondering who the hell is CHUD? Well, soon enough, CHUD will be brought to the eyes of the world as the SILENCE AFTER DARK mascott. I will keep everyone in touch with it. CHUD totally reeks of awesomeness. No he may not be a man on fire, two japonese dudes fighting in Sub-Titles, a pet monkey, or even a walking talking Chia pet. CHUD is something unique to the world. I do have something on my mind everyone. Do you all remember Slap Bracelets? Well I got one out of a vending machine the other day. Dude they still kick ass. I am going to try my damndest to bring back the style. The only bad thing is if you dont burn the edges, there is a chance that the metal will cut your wrist causing severe bleeding, cut wrist, nuasia, sudden spasims, and even lice. Well, maybe not lice, nuasia, or severe bleeding, but they can be deadly. Finally, no word still on WASTEDLIFE.com adopting me. I feel like one of those damn kids in those commercials. You know I am adorible, and I like to play FOOTBALL with the local cambodian children. Maybe I dont live off of rice or cost an arm and a leg to adopt. But for 25 cents a month, you can put me through a elementry skool education, feed me, cloth me, bathe me(I dont think I would like that), and even give me a color television so I can watch your American Sitcoms and Monday night wrestling. Sure I may not have dark complected skin, a belly that is the size of a pumpkin, the deadly mutaba virus, or even a little brother who likes to stick his finger up his nose, but I am one hell of a person and I can do alot for this world. Now that I have made everyone feel sorry for me, I can sleep tonight dreaming of sugar plums dancing in bed and visions of playmate centerfolds froliching nude in my head.

Ziggi @ 06/26/2001 12:39:01 PM Happy Birthday Today is my Brothers' BIRTHDAY. Heath Alan Bittel is 22. Wow, and I bet he is bored as hell right now. I figure he might drink tonight cause he has nothing better to do(unless there is a stripper at his appartment that I didnt know about). I figure I would announce this so he can get some EMAIL's from some of his friends wishing him a good one(since they always forgot before). Hmmm...Well, I have a little something for Heath on his birthday. Its a little story I call, "I woke up to find a Man in my bed, a big wooden spoon, and a camel licking my feet". Once apon a time, there was a man. His name was CHUD. Chud lived a normal life, worked for Starbucks, and got phone calls ever so often. I guess you could say he might be gay or he might be a loser, but oh he was not. On the weekends he would enter the UFC tournaments(now up to 32) and break peoples arms, legs, chest, necks, fingers, toes, hips, noses, more fingers, more noses, and the occasional ear. So he was one bad mamma jamma. One day while walking to his car to work, a black lemo pulled up and said, "are you CHUD?" Chud responded," Yes". The man said," your under arrest for manslaughter,robbing a long john silvers, and riding a donkey in the buff." CHUD started to run, he knew he was guilty, I mean who else would ride a donkey in the nude. Well, helicopters, bike police, horse police, and even police men on big 20 foot dogs chased him on a 12hour spree. Chud finally reached Mexico where he laughed as he waved from the border. The cops turned around and though maybe next time we will catch that meddling kid. When Chud turned around a CHUPACABRA ate him and walked across the border where it was arrested and then electricuted. The END The moral of this story is, even though you may look funny, thought to be suicidal, living the life of a Nirvana CD, just turning 22, or maybe your just plane retarded, you can live an exciting life. It's all about showing everone that you can survive a police chase, but get eaten by a chupacabra. So maybe there is no moral, maybe we all just live in a big fish bowl. Or maybe we dont exsist at all, maybe this is the matrix, that or a cheep porn flick. On other notes Aaron is getting a job at the toilet store. Wow, toilets rock. Maybe we can bring one home and smash it or flush some small creatures down it... Oh yeah, happy birthday don flamingo. Mike Tyson's punch out will always remember you as the suckiest boxer that was on there.

Ziggi @ 06/25/2001 02:09:34 PM My Summer List co·her·ent (k-hîrnt, -hr-) adj. 1) Sticking together; cohering.(i.e. glue sticks stuck to cars) 2)Marked by an orderly, logical, and supercallifradgilisticxpealidocious the era of awesomeness being consistent relation of parts: a coherent essay. Physics. Of, relating to, or having waves with similar direction, amplitude, and phase that are capable of exhibiting interference.(Or smashing stuff with mallots like watermelons) Of or relating to a system of units of alcohol comsumption in which a small number of basic units are defined from which all others in the system are derived by multiplication or division only. Botany. Sticking together with elmers glue but not fused with a part or an organ of the same kind. I understand what it means guys. Sure I can make absolutely no sense at times, but thats something I can change for your site(Wastedlife). Anyways, I have seen that you all have made summer list of things you want to accomplish. Well, here is mine. 1)Kiss a midget 2)Ride a Unicycle while juggling burning logs infested by termites 3)Revolutionize a new way to make my music sound better and heavier 4)GET A WOMAN(not a man who looks like one) 5)Learn to share my air with others 6)Take someones automobile through a carwash and leave it in there while I exit the premisis 7)Beat up a little kid who is selling Kool-Aid on the side of the road for 25 cents instead of SLUSH PUPPIES 8)Drink a beer that is just labled BEER 9) Find a person who will run into a brick wall at high speeds on a dirt bike 10) Finally, find a way to get my business of lobster racing back at Red Lobster(did you know it is illigal in Maine to gamble over lobsters?). Well, I havent heard from anyone about me coming over yet. The idea is still being tossed around. I have to be logical. But I have decided I will do it if I am wanted. Sort of like how you go to the animal shelter and you look at those dogs thinking,"man I want one, but if I dont get one, its gonna be put to sleep, that or nuitered....eh". Or you might be thinking ,"goo I want one of those bears. They get really big and steal picnic baskets and attack people leaving them in the hospital.." Anyways, for those who missed my late post last night(heath)it is on my past stories and THE FAST AND THE FURIOUS is the shit. So dont rip on it. Rice Burners are awesome. I fill mine up with liptons cajun rice once a week and man does it burn rubber.

Ziggi @ 06/24/2001 10:22:31 PM Whats goin on here Ok well, my little sister, being a moron that she is with computers, deleted my whole format including my site by clicking the phone off and on(like a light bulb) So I have been working franticaly for the past 3 hours to get this site back and running. SO FAR SO GOOD. Well here is what you have all been waiting for. Like WCW and ECW joined the WWF, I Adam "ZIGGI" BITTEL, have decided to join the WASTEDLIFE crew. Your probably thinking, WHAT THE FUCK? Well with this awesome TV OFFER, you get not only, the car washing mit, 800 metric sized piviting screw driver heads, a bar of soap, 99 bottles of beer on the wall, and a half eaten bannana all for just $19.99. Yes, Craig, God, Tim, and the other guy are probably shitting bricks right now. Your probably wondering," why in the hell would you do this?" Well this is not the end of SILENCE AFTER DARK. This just gives me the opportunity to post on TWO websites daily. Two different post on different sites, filled with thrills, chills, and the occasional man on fire with a corndog up his ass. I am out to give all the Ziggiaholics what they deserve, and that is more content, more crazyness, and more gratuidous nudity(well not me naked but good lookin girls). I will never, EEEEEEVVVVERRR, give up my baby SILENCE AFTER DARK. It's never gonna change.(well new music which I added today). Ok well your probably like, uhhh, what is he rambling about. Well, I am out to help my friends and the site that has been like a big brother to me. It is time that I move on to be WASTED. Its like how Scott Hall, Kevin Nash, and Hulk Hogan started the N.W.O. It is something that will kick everyones ass. Besides all that, I though of something cool today. What ever happened to RAINBOW BRITE. She was one fine bitch. And what about SHERA? Man she could give a dog a bone, SCHWING SCHWING. I mean you know that Heman and her got it on every night in Castle Greyskull. I bet even Skeletor got into the action(can you say 3 way). Ok besides the action figure sex, joining of a new force, and hot deals on artificial limbs(only $19.99 with this special only on TV offer), I have to get back to rebuiling my empire...

Ziggi @ 06/24/2001 02:04:44 AM Go Karts and Alcohol Well to start off, Craig, I am always happy to help with whatever you need. You have sponsored me well and I greatly appreciate it. I proudly wear the WASTEDLIFE shirt daily. If you need something off the wall, I am hear to help ya. Anywho, back to my story. Last night we decided to go to the local GO KART place. Yes after hitting golf balls at the helpless civilian in the ball grabber machine, hitting 3 cars on the highway, and dinging a few gutters on the proshop, we headed to the Karts. First we decided to ride the little pussy kiddie karts. Yes these massive monsters of 15 mph can compete with the Scooter Mania rocket scooter. I also learned that if you turn around and try to have head on collisions, they will cut your motor off. Damn electric pieces of monkey droppings. I was so pissed because I payed 3 bucks to ride around in a pink go cart for half a minute. So after venting my frustration on the car and leaving some dents in the side of the stupid thing, my friends and I headed out to the car where alcohol took its toll. This is where we decided to tackle the BIG BOYS. NASCARTS! Yes these beast go a whoppin 25 mph. They float. Not only did I almost set my MGD car on fire, but I wrecked Dale Ernhardts(R.I.P) Nascart right into turn #3, leaving it over the guard rail. GOD IT WAS FUN. My back hurts terribly today, but it was all worth it. Anyways, I worked all day again today. I heard some bad news about a friend of mine who was evicted from his apartment this morning. Poor guy. Now he is going to have to live off of cheese crackers and live under the underpass. Maybe he might get lucky and find where the mole people are lurking and live with them. I also have another argument. Girl who dis's Murray, YOU CAN SUCK MY HAIRY GOAT NIPPLES in a vat of tarter sauce, you she bitch. How dare you. I also want to give a shout out on my boy ANDY. I hope you get laid tomorrow night and show whats her name, the girl you dated for 3 years, the one who likes watching lesbian sex flicks while gettin it on(ooopps, I said too much), that your the frickin man and you totally reek of awesomeness. To conclude, New MUSIC IS COMING SOON. Goat Nipples and Tarter Sauce dont mix. Alcohol and GO-Karts kick ass. And Poor people can always result to committing crimes cause your always takin in by the state prison system. DONT ACTUALLY COMMITT Violent crimes, like shooting liquor store clerks, or butt raping your neighbors statue of a naked man while listening to Hank Williams Jr.(wait, I did it again, I might just shut up now). Back to the mental state I refer to as my silence.

Ziggi @ 06/23/2001 01:04:17 AM Sorry About That Sorry about the lack of post today. I was drunk the other night and decided I must post to please my loyal fans. Anywho Liquid Cocaine had its' tow on me. Anywho I ran into something that amazes me. DAFT PUNK. Yes this CD is full of freaky PORN Music. I love the mother. I can drive down Frederica and people will just stare at me because of the crazy pornadelic shit coming from my car. I love it. Besides all the mole people and moon crickets, I am doing just great. I worked all damn day. I have another day of hell tomorrow. I am working on some new material on my guitar abilities. I am also trying to think of something cool to work on my site. Any suggestions? Give me an Email. I want to branch my site into something new, something fresh, something that has bald midgets, lawn gnombs, mullets, and the mixture of TNT with Elvis's hair gel. I want to revolutionize the self being of the fish heads and mop buckets that run this thing I call Silence After Dark. Anyways, besides all the mass hysteria, I watched a chick last night get drunk(found out she was only 15), ate grilled stuff from Aaron(props), and got annoyed by a certain girl so I left. I wish she would fall off the edge of the world. This damn girl is going to Murray, and all she does is complain about how much the place sucks. I can tell her this, Murray doesnt suck, your just a psycho hose beast and you look like Janet Reno and you have sex with Mole People with strap on cucumbers. Thats just my frustration. I am also learning VOODOO now. So I can help some people, and I can also crush them with plagues of locust and giant frogs. Doggies eat apple sauce to make world peace. hehehe. I figure if I learn this shit, it might come to my advantage in the long run. Sure, its against my religion, but there always has to be a rebel in all of us. I mean, voice of reason. When it says, "ah she is older than you, you have no chance" I say, "hey, shut the hell up, before I stick a Q-tip in you". I am serious about suggestions. I have noticed other website have started getting boring, and I dont want my site to become that way. If it got boring, I dont know what I would do. I might pull a Kurt Cobain(R.I.P), or I might just stick myself in a womans uterus for a week or two so I can come up with some ideas. Well, back to listening to this Funkadelic Pornorific Dorkimus Maximus God Forsaken Crazy Bamboo Robotechotic Wilda Beast called DAFT PUNK. Good Golli I am on Fiya.

Ziggi @ 06/21/2001 02:59:33 AM AAETk Me dfunkr eat pottatoss....I lykee this ber. It is good. BAckkk to walt disney land gooooo. Watch me fall orff the car door. Whammmm. Jesuuuus is inthe pohne book.

Ziggi @ 06/19/2001 09:09:01 AM I'm BACK! Part Deux Well ladies and gentlemen, I HAVE RETURNED TO OOOOOOWWWWWEEEENNNSBORO! If you smell what I am cooking. You know how I was joking the other day on here about my flight to Baton Rouge and how I mentioned I wish there was a terrorist on there? Well just my luck, on my flight home yesterday, a man threated to shoot everyone around him. He was a complete nut job. I mean, you have to be a complete moron to say something like that on a plane. You know you going to jail. And I bet he spent the night with Billy Bob in cell 245. He deserved it, just like those damn lawn gnombs. I told those bastards to stay outta the yard. But damn I wanted off that plane as soon as possible. It was cool how the FBI agents got the asshole and stuck it to him.HEHEHE, police brutality is cool. Anyways, It was probably the scariest thing to happen to me in a while. I guess you gotta be careful what you wish for. It felt really good when I picked up my guitar last night. It was something, such a relief. It was like those herbal essence commercials relived. It totally reeked of awesomenss. Anyways, it was probably the most fun I have ever had in a trip. It was worth it I presume, except for the $4 smokes. I had some chicks check me out right before we left my bros appartment yesterday. My dad was a witness, and they were hotties too. DAMN, why didnt they come there like a week ago instead of yesterday. Kinda made me mad, but here in the boro, it aint no thing. To conclude, dont fly places(its not worth it), if you do fly dont say a damn thing cause you might end up jailbait literaly, and if a girl checks you out go over and ask them if they want to fuck(you have a complete sure shot if they eye you like they want you). Oh yeah, if you see a lawn gnomb smash it. They are the most lethal criminals you can find, besides the llama. Oh well, Off to start breeding our sea monkeys...

Ziggi @ 06/19/2001 01:59:43 AM This May Be The Last Supper Well all, I am sitting here listening to SEVENDUST, keeping my mind at ease, and trying to find out the easiest method to high-jack Santa's sled. In a few hours, I will be on my trip home. It might just very well be my last trip home. There is always a chance of being killed when traveling. The Will is totally in effect. I dont think I am going to die, but if I do(there has been random events of Lawn Gnombs taking engines out in airplanes), I will miss you all, especially you Felipe, my little cheese cracker boy. You were always loved by me. I just dont understand how all that chedder was on you. So cheesey, so innocent. Ok but here is my last request, if I were killed on the way home, please someone, anyone, call 911 and tell them my plane went down. It will probably be to late, and they will already know about it, but hey its cool to give the operator hell. Also ask if you can order an extra value meal while you are on there.=) HAHA. They only thing I fear is that I get stuck on a plane with a pilot who can only read brail. Damn the luck. Or what if he is missing an arm. Or what if he only has one eye. Or what if, he is a blind, bald, one eyed, one armed, midget, who likes to play Yatzee and eat cottage cheese wheels... GOOO.... Craig I am interrested to hear of OZZFEST, give ,me output. Or send it to the Ziggi Memorial fund that Masonville food center will have by the quarter machine. All donations are good until the 19th of August. On the 20th you have to visit the magic mountain where you will be sexually harrassed by a group of sea monkeys in which I have created to take over Cambodia. They might even steal your shoes. Hold onto them tightly. And beware of the stripeless zebra, he is a mean character.

Ziggi @ 06/18/2001 04:59:11 PM Random inquiring stuff Right now I am bored off my ass. I have been driving my mom and little sister(in which I am about to shoot) around all day. Not even listening to DROWNING POOL helped from the annoyingness of my little sister. Sometimes I would like just to tell her to shut the hell up and get the hell outta my way.Oh wait I already do that, it doesnt work. Hmmm. Well maybe my voodoo doll might have some works with this little pest. Anyways, today is my last day in Baton Rouge. I will return home tomorrow everyone. And AS SOON AS I GET HOME, GUITAR WILL BE HEARD ACROSS MASONVILLE... But in the mean time, I will sit here, waiting, for Uncle Bens Rice bowl food stuff to get done. I am hungry. Who cares if thousand of slave children die to supply Uncle Ben with his rice creations. I want food. I know that wrestling comes on at 8. Thats when the TV will be mine. No stupid Weakest Link with a dumb brit talking smack behind a podium. I would love to smack the shit out of that lady. Why doesnt she show her face on a real show like Raw is War. I would love to see the Taker put her in the Last Ride, or have her 3D'd through a table. Man she makes me irrate. I think I am going to smoke a cig now. Ok I am back, uh, .... oh yeah, I need something to do. I wish I knew where a hot chicks appartment was so I could go and...watch soaps with her or something. I cant wait to get on a plane tomorrow. Hopefully it will be speedy so I can get home quick. I need to escape from my family. Back at home I dont have to be around them cause I am constantly away. But being with them a week straight is enough to make me lose it. Its like prison all over again. Except in prison it was Jim Bob. But that a whole other story. Maybe if I am lucky I will fall asleep early so it will all be over, no I am not going to stick my head in an oven. I might think about the microwave(wait there is no microwave)damn the irony...

Ziggi @ 06/17/2001 04:25:52 PM I'm BACK! Finally, The WHOLE FN' Show , has come back, to Baton Rouge. It was a long trip. A whole hour long. Anywho to just tell you this, Bourbon Street is the shit. Filled with T and A, drunks, and spray painted mimes. I mean, what can be better than that. No I did not see any midgets doing circus acts. I did see alot of people that were trash doing various things. I just dont understand how some of these people make a living doing this. And if you go down there, hold close to your SMOKES. Those bastards will clean you out. And say your broke so they will leave you alone cause your money deplinishes like water. If you see a bar with a rainbow flag, DONT GO IN, you might just get hit on by another guy, or a woman that is a guy, or a girl who use to be a guy who has a receeding hairline and a tatoo of bubba on its arm. Lets just say Heath got a chicks number(isnt that rare) and a picture with her(yes she is hot). However he suffered the concequiences of the HURRICANE. Yes, he was a little tipsy. Well to be honest, he was fizucked beyond belief, enough that he wasnt really capable of making it to Bourbon Street. I got some wicked pictures. Hell I even got a picture with a Bum and sang with him. I wasnt drunk, he was, but I felt it was my obligation to risk my health to help out a brother. Oh yeah, I even got JESUS' phone #!!!! It was in the New Orleans phone book, not just one Jesus, but 4 more. I am amazed at how many saviors there really is. Its crazy. However, the trip was great, I spent all my damn money(bought Drowning Pools new CD- its tight as hell), and checked out alot of wild women. The only thing that sucked was my trip to taco bell/KFC. Now you would think that a chain such as taco bell/KFC would have my favorite CHILI CHEESE BURRITOs. But they did not. I about told the stupid drugged up moon cricket to take a burrito, put some meat in it, place some cheese all on it, and sell it to me for .99. I mean shit, how hard is it to make one. They could put a monkey on the back line and he could do more work than anyone there. Programmed machines those monkeys are. To conclude, if your in New Orleans, stay away from Pat O'Brians, he will tear you up. Also the hottest hot sauce is called SATANS BLOOD. It comes in its' very own vile. If that doenst intimidate you, I dont know what will, well maybe fat women in motorized wheel chairs with a rebel flag on the machine singing slap my ass and call me jemiahma.

Ziggi @ 06/16/2001 06:37:10 AM Laura Croft - No Brainer Yes last night Heath and I went to go witness yet another failure in the Movie Industry. Tomb Raider could have been created by mindless 7 year olds who are just starting to think that women do not have cooties any more. Well first off, women never had cooties, and if they did, then it would be similiar to something like aids or something to that nature. Ok back to the movie. This movie could have been summed up by having her swing on a rope for a few minutes and then throw in the slow motion scene of her running, breast bouncing, and breath panting. Needless to say, I was more intertained by Juan Claude Van Dams' pathetic GUILE portrial in Street Fighter The Movie. I just kept wondering to myself, "I wonder if she is going to get naked?" Cause thats all everyone in the theater wanted to see. Angelina Jolee prancing around nude. However all that everyone saw was a side shot. I give this props. But then a few scenes after there was another gratuidous nudity scene, except it was a half naked man. DAMNIT. Now what the hell was that about. I was also wondering why in the hell did they start having TV commercials before the movie. I was confused cause it is a PEPSI sponsored movie, yet coke commercials were coming on. Next thing you know there is going to be Playtex commercials and hemroid cream ones. Its just wrong. I came to a movie to see a freaking movie, not to see stupid commercials that I came to get away from, that and an annoying sister who talks about cornrolls and lil romeo. All in all, the whole movie mad absolutely no sense at all. It was like watching Super Mario Bros the Movie, backwards in slow motion. I had no clue what was going on at anytime, and I just couldnt figure out why in the hell Giant Robot Lobster thing chased her in the beggining. It was so intimidating. Not only was it equiped with a can opener, but you could insert change into a slot and a coke would come out. What ever happend to cool robots like Ed-209. He was the shit, plus he actually killed people. Also the soundtrack sucked ass, I though Zombie's new song was on it, only to find out it was NIN's new one, which I am not impressed. Today however I am off to NEW ORLEANS. I am going to buy some VOODOO dolls, maybe a deer head, and an extra value meal at McDonalds. I just hope that some transvestite doesnt hit on me cause I know I am so attractive. I figure I will take some pictures of people that I dont know, just so I can look at them in the future and say, " Damn I dont know who that girl is, but she had some nice tig ol bitties." It just freaks me out what the youth of America will do for beads. You give me beads and I might throw them back at you because I dont give a rats ass for a piece of plastic. You throw me $$$ I might take something off, only to get you to throw more money at my FABIO build body.

Ziggi @ 06/15/2001 11:27:40 PM Daily Dose Of Wisdom Well right now I am listening to the Music Channels on digital cable. I gotta have this shit. I dont know what it is about a thing that actually has a METAL station, Brazilian, Tenjio, Classic Rock, etc. Well I dont listen to the second or third(different language), but I think it is sweet to have them. Besides that today is going to be a boring day. My family has all gone to the pool.Thank God, time on my own. I just need a chill pill. Without my guitar I am slowly drifting from reality and becoming something piss ass mean. I dont know why, but its like I have a lost connection.But besides my day here, I felt like sharing some quotes of wisdom. Here we go. "All Women are Lesbians or have Lesbian tendencies" - Now I have heard this from a man who was very wise. However if you say it around a girl, they will hate you, slap you, or even mase you. So take cation with this one. "Don't Drink The Water" - Dave Matthews said it best. Whenever traveling to different places, dont drink it. Did you know that millions of sea monkeys swim in the water, and drinking them gives you firey diahria. "Live and Let Die" - Hell, in my opinion everything should just die, cause things can get extremely annoying, remember Barney? "Don't Play with Match's" - Ok, now I am serious here. Thousands of woodlands are burned down due to little slave children playing with them. Smokey The Bear would not be happy. He might even go by live and let die and shoot you if he caught you, that or eat you, he is a bear you know. "Don't forget to flush the toilet" - Its bad enough to see the suprise left behind, but the ass goblins don't like it. They are human just like we are and they just don't appreciate it. "Always remember to tie your shoes" - Did you know that children every day are pulled in by escalators because their shoes are untied. It is not a pretty site. "If it has a Skull and Crossbones on it, don't drink it after 7 a.m." - If you take household products and drink them before 7 a.m. it wont kill you, just hurt you badly. Actually it will kill you. Dont try this at home. "There is nothing in the sewers, just sewege" - This is a flat out lie. Do you know how many mole people live in the sewer? Alot. Also the ninja turtles live there, I say you take cation when your in the sewer. I hear the mole people have no eyes and they carry bent forks in their hands. Ok that was some wisedom for today, but I have another topic that is frightening. Did you now that millions of children in south thailand die daily collecting rice for us. Yes, these children only get paid $2.31 a month. Just to pick rice. If you see little blackish brown pieces in your rice, those are their toe nails. These poor things are inslaved to supply America with rice. They are beaten by Giant Rat people with whips, and if they don't work hard enough, they are sent home so they can watch Japonese cartoons that eventually make them have spastic fits cause of the bright flashs. So please, avoid rice as much as you can. The only thing it is good for is blowing up birds.

Ziggi @ 06/14/2001 05:17:22 PM Old Ships, Old Buildings, and a Slave Plantation... Well today I went to some of the most boringest places I have been in my life. First we went to a place called Little Poor Boys. Good food, but it seemed like a rip on Big Boy. He is way cooler. They only bad thing actually bad was the smokes in there. I had to pay $4.00. That is horrible, what kind of land is this? Afterwards we headed to the old capital. This place seemed to look like a castle from Castlevania. It was strange and the guide seemed to be at least 88 yrs old and mumbled everything. Yeah your helpful. Soon after we headed to the river to see "The Kid" . Frankly I dont care to see a boat that was hit by a Kamakazi plane, which the ship probably deserved it. I then was stuck in a science museum, the only thing positive about this was that I purchised some sea monkeys. Yes Sea Monkeys. Did you know that they live up to two years. That is two years that I can start my militia of Evil Sea Monkeys. They will do my bidding and kidnap beer trucks across the land. Also in the museum was a hot chick. She smiled at me, but she seemed much older, maybe by 3 years. She was a blonde fit my description of what I prefer in a woman. To bad I was with my parents or I might have spit some game.chea... Finally, after driving backwards for an hour or so, we came to a slave plantation. No there were no slaves on it, no dead bodies, no spooky old man at the front saying," You damn meddling kids!". I think the guide was gay, he kept checkin me out, that or he liked my shorts.eeehhh... Needless to say, today was boring off my ass. I could have huffed lighter fumes and had more fun. ALL I WANT TO DO IS GO TO NEW ORLEANS, BUY A VOODOO DOLL, and maybe help the 6'ers win the playoffs. Maybe I could get one like KOBE and stab him in the hands so he cant shoot. We were talking about the Bayou Swamp Tours, I dont know if that is a great idea though. Have you ever seen Swamp Thing? That dude was scary as hell. Plus I heard that he use to work at Jack In The Box(which there is plenty of them here),can you say mad cow disease? Swamp Thing + Jack N Box + Sea Monkeys - old man in thong X crazy man who looks like Bayou Billy in womans underguards = Bad situation. To conclude, take cation when doing stuff you have no interrest, because you will smoke about everything you have, even your hard earned money.

Ziggi @ 06/13/2001 09:37:24 PM Beer, The other white meat... Today has been very eventful, full of a trip to walmart, sitting online workin on this site(yes I put up some new links), and sending Tim Stark a picture of Xena Warrior Princess...hehehe. Anywho tonight was probably te best, we went to some place my broter reccommended "Chucks" or "Chodes" or something of that. Needless to say, they checked my ID and said "Just dont go to the bar". I was like, "SWEET". So I sat with my parents and drank a COORS LIGHT. Now what does that say about this place? It says, go ahead drink, we want you to spend your money cause we are too cheap to fix the roads. Crosby Stills and Nash was there, I have no clue who it was, but the dude looked just like him. He probably would have signed the napkin crosby stills and nash. Go fig. I also noticed that the girls of LSU are freakin HOTTTTTT....Better than Mulimucoo sha good god larry bird crazy Dee Snyder Bitch. Anywho,I have something on my mind. The NIKE comercials. Yeah you know, the ones with the guys doing all that circus freak shit with the basket ball. Ok now you dont see the behind the scenes. Thats why I have taken to my imagination what truely happens. Ok the one dude, with the bald head, wait they are all bald. Anywho, he throws the ball into the toilet but they cut that scene out. Then when the guy dunks, he actually got hunf in the goal and parimedics had to get him down after a long 35 sec. If I were only so talented, maybe I could throw the ball into someones face and then watch it roll across the ground. Damn I have talent. The comercial actually is digitally inhanced. The whole time he actually is just dribbling the ball, but they add in some Harlem Globtroters moves(I just wish that one day they would lose). I should have never bet on those damn other guys. Anyways I am going to go back to watching the game. Stupid moon crickets, all they need to do is put crazy white dude in there, take out Mutumbo(ball go in hoop), and boom, maybe the 6'ers might win. That or hell will freeze over first.

Ziggi @ 06/12/2001 12:20:11 AM Sin City Here I Am... Well Ladies And Gentlemen, I have arrived to SIN CITY(a.k.a New Orleans/Baton Rouge) I still havent seen those damn girls that were in the music video about rouge something.I think it went mulele coocoo chocolatea moca fuckin sucks. I also noticed Christina Algulera(or whatever)looks like DEE SNYDER from TWISTED SISTER. Thats just something you don't want to get off on. She doesnt get a "swhing", she gets a " is that a man in drag?". Anywho, I have been flying all damn day long. I was just hoping so bad that a terrorist would make a move or something and John Mclean would bust throught the Delta Plane window and blow his ass away. Then jump off the plane to plummet to his death. Not as if Bruce Willis isn't cool, but ever sense Disneys' "The Kid", I have kinda lost some respect, well alot of respect. It's funny how people can be complete assholes at airports. You have your first class citizens, fully equiped with their laptops, starbucks coffie(which there is a zillion in every airport), and their cell phones at their ear the whole freakin time. Then there is the gold package/silver emblem passengers who get to go on the plane before you only to get shittier setting than I got. And finally there is me. Your average joe who only packs his cd's, a headset, and a pack of smokes. I am not bitching at life, but my right ear hurts like a bitch. Anyways, I figure I could have something interresting if I could think about it right now but I am kinda tired from the whole trip and I figure I will have something good as I explore this merciful city...

Ziggi @ 06/11/2001 02:14:56 PM My Will... Ok well the HINDU Party totally reeked of awesomeness. I was drunk almost all day, played a drunken 4-yr-old in NBA LIVE 2001 on PSX2 and talked trash to the little bitch, and went swimming in the kiddie pool. It was sweet. Ok but to get serious now. I am writing my will. Just incase I was killed in an untimely freak plane crash on the way to and from New Orleans. To Matt Roberts - My car so you can sell it to fix your mustang that was wrecked Sat. To Tom "Da Don" Jarboe - My computer, so you can look up internet porn and actually type your papers at home. To Josh "What up Man" Hoffman - My guitars and amps, you can enjoy them and hope your band gets somewhere. To Aaron "Pappa" Roach - My Larry Bird Starting Line-Up Figure, I owe you from all the G.I.Joes and X-Men figures I burned at your house. To Jarod "Half Man Half Amazing" Tucker - I leave you my gift of game, cause I at least fool around with good lookin women when I am drunk. To my brother - I leave anything expensive that I have, my bank acount, the dreamcast, any furniture, the truck, and anything else that is important that you don't have. To Craig Clayton - My website, my turntables, and all my old comic books.( I figure you can do something with them) To Ben Gross - My wooden spoon, and a box of rice. To Tim Stark - a picture of a fat lady in a wheel chair with whips and chains, and a box of pop tarts. To Scott" God " Randolph - You get to keep the title of God, and you can have my title as The Whole Fn' Show. To Red Lobster - My work shirts back , and all the shit I have stolen from the place. To conclude, if I left you out, there is plenty of cans of spam, quacker oats, little slave children, and things that make your skin crawl in my room. Enjoy.

Ziggi @ 06/10/2001 10:45:22 AM Circle Of Death Last yesterday after traffic school, a tragic occurence took place. Matt wrecked his Mustang. I have never seen someone so frantic. I felt really bad because his parents were out of town. Well my parents came and helped him out and so forth. However his parents will be home within the next few hours. I wonder what is going to happen? So basically the post today is about what happened to continue after traffic school. Anywho about last night. Well it rocked. Matt and I began to drink his sorrows away. Here is the roster of people who were at matt and josh's. (Matt and Josh, Me, Tboe, Ken, Humpi, Johny, Jennifer, Amanda, Tiff, Leeanne, the dude who has my concrete monkey Yarthax, and some dude we called Franciss). Anyway, the red lobster people started to play circle of death while the others were upstairs. I gotta give props totally to Amanda and Jennifer cause they make this game totally fun when you have to take your cloths off. Needless to say, after having to say my sentences backwards, use the same word at the end of a sentence twice twice, and drink multiple alcoholic bevereges, Amanda was down to Bra and Thong(yes thong). I was down to my boxers and hat, luckily we had drawn all the "take something off" cards. We had all sorts of good music i.e. James Brown. Good God, monkey paw backsratcher! The only bad thing about last night was the trip to taco bell. I know that lady wanted to shoot Tboe and I for our $45 order of tacos and chili cheese burritos. We came out of that place with every damn taco you could imagine. Plus Josh and I argued for another hour again trying to figure out what tool song we were watching on the DVD. I kept telling him is was Aenema. He said no, and to find out this morning it was Aenema. Everytime we are drunk we have that arguement and I know what the song is, but he can always get me to think otherwise. I guess I really do know my TOOL. I didn't do anything destructive or anything to harm myself being. I saw Kenny Rogers at church, and a really big lady who couldn't fit in her chair at red lobster(probably one of Tim's women). sYawynA, I evah a udnih ytrap ot dnetta.

Ziggi @ 06/09/2001 12:39:55 PM Traffic School Yes Boys and Girls, I woke up this morning at 7:00 to go to traffic school. This is probably the funniest thing I have done in a while. If your a sick and twisted individual like me, you enjoy things like this. Yes watching numerous videos on driving is a trip. We watched a cartoon(sucked goat balls), but then we watched a sweet movie. This dude was drunk driving, was going 120 in his mustang in the wrong lane, and hit someone head on. He was in jail for the murder but it was funny cause he was like," Yeah I was Drunk Speeding 120mph and I hit this bitch head on yeah I am cool." - all in one sentence. And the people around me had some funny stories to tell. One lady ran a stop sign and was pulled over. She kept telling the cop, "It had a white frame around it" Well needless to say, her friend told her that she didn't have to stop at stop signs with white frames around them. We told her, all stop signs have white frames around them. The wheels in her head were turning, you could see it. Another guy was driving his semi when he tried to pull a smokey and the bandit in his truck, however he was stopped at a road block. Talk about sucking it hard. But the funniest of all was the guy beside me. He was a trip. Not only did he look like Rob Zombie, but he was a dealer, he had gotten a DUI on a bicycle, he had been pulled over 23 times within the past 6 months, and he had a story to tell on why he was there. Supposedly him and his girlfriend were engaging in sexual activities while he was driving, well he ran a red light didn't see the cop from all the commotion, was pulled over, and the rest is history. Two half naked peole in a car with an officer overlooking. If only my story was as cool, stupid Western Ky Parkway. I should have just made up a story like, I was driving and I hit a stop sign, then I hit two pedestrians, and ran through the drive thru window at Dairy Queen. To conclude, traffic school can be fun, if you have fun people in there with you. And even though I lost some sleep by getting up early, it was all worth it. Oh yeah, and don't do sexual favors while driving, if you do, make sure you don't get pulled over and you put your piece up before the officer gets there.

Ziggi @ 06/08/2001 3:28:41 PM Thinking I am going to come to terms with TIM. Everyone already knows I would never do something like that to a person. I would instead get out of my car, punch them, take their money, and then run over them. So it couldnt have been me Tim. Plus you misspelled my last name.It's (BITTEL) . Anywho, I won't send you anything dramatic. However you will still be recieving that Fat lady in a wheel-chair with a whip and chains. HAHAHAHA. In the meantime, keep up the good work. Yes, life does suck. But hey things could be worse, you could have gotten fired from your job, found out your girlfriend broke up with you for another woman, go home to a burned down home, your hottub overflowed, and in your back yard an old bald man in a thong with a goat in a cage saying he is God. Anywho, I am heading back to work. I have traffic school in the morning(for running over people who need help on the side of the road), so I won't be posting late tonight. I will have a good post on Traffic school tomorrow though. Keep it real, keep it clean, and for those people who like to molest Tim, keep it out of his ass.

Ziggi @ 06/08/2001 12:00:10 AM Yippie Yi Yo Ki Yea Mofo. Tonight was sweet, went to a party, got head from a hot chick(yea Tim, she was probably younger, but I took your advise)No longer young Jedi, but Totally Reek Of Awesomeness Jedi. Anywho, It was just a good night. But here is something that I am concerned with. I have noticed that it has been raining, EVERY DAMN DAY I WASH MY CAR. Now why would I be tormented by this. AHHHH I want to throw pancakes at people!!! Actually, I am anticipating daily about college. I can't wait to get to Murray, be re-united with the Wasted Crew, my Bro, Los Porales ,WALMART, and that crazy guy who works at KFC that gives free chicken to people who are missing limbs, oh wait.... Anyways, I have not heard anything about getting a roommate yet. I have no clue who I am going to be paired with. Just watch my luck I will get some staight up country person who only listens to country. You think thats horrible, what if it is a person who is totally into gospel stuff..AHHH, metal and God do not clash too well. There is nothing against gay people, but what if I was stuck in a room with a guy who like me,not as a friend. For example(heath and I have already talked of this), "Knock Knock." on the suite mate door. "Come on in big boy." gay roommate who like me. ~~~~> me running the hell out of the dorm and over to Craigs. Loading gun....Yeah, freaks me out. Reese, your cool as hell, hope you get your rainbow beer, I give you total props. But there are some people out there who scare me. This concerns me. What if I get stuck with someone who is more mental than me. Someone who like to set fire to his clothing or likes to cut himself with razors. Or a person who like to eat moth balls, do coke, and staple wall-paper to his tongue. Or maybe someone who talks to walls and has an imaginary friend named Tito. Talk about freakin crazy. I think I might be at Heath and that one dude he is livin withs' appartment a lot. I know most of you MSU students have been in this situation. I just want your opinion. And maybe I might shake this paranoia. I know the woman are F.I.N.E down there though. Bada Bing....

Ziggi @ 06/07/2001 12:22:40 AM 3 Horny Girls, and what not. I have been couped up in my house all day long. I played WWF No Mercy for N64 half of my day, and the other half went towards learning all the OZZY songs I could on guitar toady. However after getting tired of watching NBA, I felt like I would go into town. I drove around on Frederica St.(the main st. of OWENSBORO). Yes it was sad, but I felt I might see someone I knew. Anywho, I was driving when I saw one of my friends Brian. So I tried to catch him, but I failed. However 3 Girls in a Red Civic pulled up beside me. They said, "Hey there! Where are you going?" I responded, "Uh, Hi , Uh, Thats a Good Question?" I was preoccupied in my old school BIZKIT playing(3 Dolla Bill Ya'll). Well they began to follow me. I wasn't really in the mood for this. So after 15 minutes I lost the 3 girls. Thank God, cause they kept asking me questions like," Hey you wanna go F#Ck?" and " People Say I can make a man scream." Now your probably wondering," WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU?!" Now I'll tell you this, I have a good instinct for trouble, I knew even though they were extremely good looking, something was up if they were all 3 asking me for Nookie. I lost them by pulling into red lobster. I met up with some friends and I was told something interresting. They had swung by McDonalds and said these 16 yr old girls were going around asking guys if they would stick their dicks in their TW@Ts. Needless to say, these were the same 3 girls. They were described perfectly. Now there is nothing wrong with this, however I am 18 and that says JAILBAIT. They also told me that they have slept with a 34 yr old guy I know. Scary eh? One had a kid too. So I guess I got the better deal in all of this. I stayed diseaseless and happy. Another funny thing I found out was a girl who tried to mess around with me, is my distant cousin. Good thing I said no there, that and she tore my good work pants. I just don't understand why I am tormented daily by these things. How gay can people be. So here is my conclusion. If your a Girl,(your not a whore, your not my cousin who is a whore, you dont have kids, your not missing limbs, like to do it with animals in da butt.)good looking, have a wonderful personality, please find me at the nacho stand. And to all my fans, stay away from certain things. They may seem good at first, but when you find out their past, and it's a shitty one, You'll deeply regret it.

Ziggi @ 06/06/2001 12:25:13 AM Mentos...Get Away with anything Have you noticed that the Mentos commercials promote getting away with anything you want to. It seems to be a proven fact, that if you use mentos, you can do just about whatever the hell you want. You could run into a liquor store, pull out a gun, Ask for all the money in the register, afterwards pulling out a roll of mentos. The clerk will laugh and you will leave the store like nothing happened. I mean the commercial states it best, "The Freshmaker!" Now everything fresh means everything is good, so why cant you do criminal acts and get away with it freshly. For example, I could go up to someones hot girl-friend, have sex with her multipul times, and then show the dude mentos and he would be like, "Cool..." It's not as if I have some sort of deathwish with Mentos, but it seems so simple in the world of Fruit Chew Breath Fresheners. If only life was so easy like the commercials. In one, a man sees his mental Aunt in the mall. He runs and hides with a manican. She goes down the escalator, turns around to see him, and he pops a mento in his mouth, she laughs and life goes on. So does that mean you can lose the cops and then flip a mento in your mouth and you get away scott free? Well it seems like it's possible. To conclude, please don't try this unless you are a professional. It is very risky and I should be the only human being in the planet to do this, since I did find this godly power. Mentos are the answer. You thought that you win, ha. I laugh at incompitance. I have MENTOS! The world is in my hand.

Ziggi @ 06/05/2001 11:59:58 PM Majestic Pinapple I have found a new fun thing to do this summer. Now it might be kinda strange to say this but I enjoy it especially when I am bored. I have taken control of being a God. Yes a God. I just purchised a game called BLACK AND WHITE. THIS GAME TOTALLY ROCKS. You take control as God. You create a Godly creature to roam the tribes and make sure that they worship you. If not, YOU BRING FORTH HELL AND DAMNATION... Today, Mutar - My Godly Beast, got hungry for worshipers who gave up on me. I then used the bathroom on their homes and chucked a few of the villagers over a mountain. It is great. You can let out all your frustration on followers. You are their fate and fortune. You can protect them, or you can bury them. It feels soooo good to be evil at times. Well enough of my power trip. Another night, another thing. I am still on the search for my pants. Someone took them. I don't think the llama did it this time. I think that the tar babies took them. Those damn creatures. The slip out of the nicotein from my smokes at night and rummage through my room. I havent caught one yet. When I do, I am going to smoke him. Fundimental high will I recieve. Anywho, I wish I had my pants.They were cool. They were my camo-capri thingys. Now I wear my GI. Joe shirt in my boxers. I dont get the same effect. In other news, 76'ers all the way in the NBA. I hope Kobe gets schooled by IVERSON. The CORNROLLS are sweet. I wish only basketball was like wrestling. "O'Neal goes for the dunk, OH MY, LEGON OF DOOM!, L.O.D.!" " O'Neal just Clotheslined by the L.O.D. This is a slobber knocker!" You could have pyros and run-ins by other NBA players in the game. "Vince Carter brings out the TABLE! DEAR GOD, CONCHAIRTO on him by SCOTTY PIPPIN and LARRY JOHNSON!" I think that would spicen things up a little. And just think about football...oh wait, XFL sucked ass..Nevermind, it might be a bad idea to have Wrestlers jump into sports. Could you just see 6'10 KANE on ice-skates. Nope. However it would be cool to see him chokeslam from hell the whole Detriot Redwings team. I wonder if he would be put in the penalty box?

Ziggi @ 06/04/2001 01:04:21 AM Tattered Torn, and Tired as hell Saturday Night To continue from last night. Ok well, We searched for hours to find a place tha didnt exsist anymore. Yes the sign was knocked down, the bridge was burned down, the creek was filled, and it looked like one of my dads farms. Total waste of time, effort, conscience. Anywho, my friend Jarod decided to smoke it up. High as a kite. Asking me if I could hear the trains in my backyard. Asked me why the popcorn vender downstairs wouldn't sell him popcorn. And then put on a puppet show for me. Now this was enough to put me to sleep after laughing at his stupidity for a while. Sunday Ok woke up, worked all morning. Probably one of the boringest workdays I have had in two years. The only interresting thing is I had a take-out where a very large lady, well to be honest, she was fat as fat can be, ordered 6 ultimate feast(Large quantity of seafood products). I don't think she was trying to feed her family, I believe she was feeding herself, that or a very big dog. However I think she was just fat. Anywho, got done, went to Aarons, went bowling. Have you ever been bowling with a crazy attitude. My goal was to score only a 13. Yes it is very easy, when you throw the ball into the other lane, close your eyes and bowl, bowl with someone hanging on your leg, acting as if you had a horrible bowling accident back in 82 and you have a twitch in your leg, etc. It was a trip. After this, back to Aarons. Kyle told us to stop the jeep in the middle of Aarons drive. Wondering what the hell is goin on. Sure your drunk, but Ken and I were confused. The nest thing we know, Kyle is outta the jeep running at a possuem. Usually people avoid these rabid creatures, well kyle ran right in front of the bitch. It stopped, hissed, and within a second or two, steel toe boot right to its abdomen. I swear to you, the thing flew about 30 ft. The next thing I know, Ken jumps out runs and jumps on its head. Talk about sick individuals that I hang out with. This was hilarious. Only if it was taped, I would constantly re-wind Kyle running out of his jeep and Field Goaling the creature of the night. Anywho, soon after we went ghost hunting. This went to know where but we did go mudding. The bad part is, I was in the back of the truck. Ended up leaving looking like someone from woodstock. It blew and it was cold as shit. Then we went to the carwash, washed myself off via Johnny Knoxville. Then off to the boarder. Taco Bell. Thats where I got into a fight, defending friend. Got lip busted, busted other guys nose and lip. Thank God for the WWF. I was one bad mamma jamma. Ha you can throw punch's, but your face is going to hit the ground before mine does via DDT/ACID DROP. So there is my weekend for ya. Full of drunkeness, suspense, boredom, fighting, old men in thongs saying they are god, animal abuse, and of course flirting with women with boyfriends. Damn it feels good to be different. So you probably understand why I haven't had time to post today. And I apollogize for it with all my heart. Not really. But I promise you, next time I find a mountain dew cap with $10 off a $50 purchise, I will give it too ya. Sleep Good, Potato, eat, mmmmm, sanity slowly slipping, where in the hell are my pants.....