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This weeks page'o'crap 'bout........ Linda's Fan Club Sign-ups
Age:10-13/14-17/18-up (please apply age applicable to how old you LOOK)

1. Have we seen you before? (y/n) If so where? (church/school/past life ex/other)
2. What is your income? (100-1000/2000-4000/none(living off others))
3. How often do you or your family purchase a new vechicle? (1-4 years/5-10 years/years?! hell try months)
4. To what point do you begin to show hostility? (never/when insulted)/when irratated/when you first meet 'em)
5. Do you talk sweet nothings to your dog? (y/n)
6. How did you come to know the Linda fan club? (friend/internet/What the hell is the Linda fan club?!)

This application will be sent to Linda or her legal representives to be decided who is selected to be a member in this fan club. CAUTION: If you are accepted beware of accidental unknown critism, sarcasm, and/or shouting. If subject to any of the following look directly at the floor and remain silent in a submitting fashion. Afterward accept apologie, but be aware of an instant accdental re-occurance. Remember: Linda is completely non-violent so any course of action that may induce mental or physical injury(ies) was NOT caused by her. CAUTION: Beware that membership can be suspended or cancelled if Linda feels "bugged"(annoyed, pestered, belittled) To re-admit into club membership after Linda has banned you, wait 10-20 years for complete forgiveness and re-admittence.

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