Mirror My Desire, Part 3

Jander woke the next day to a rapping on his door. He startled into full awareness, noticing suddenly he was not in his room, but in Zeke's. A rainbow of emotions hit him: fear, guilt, rage, embarrassment, disgust. After a few moments, his mind rested on a sort of profound, but not outward sadness.

"Jander?" Came a muted voice from behind the door. "I want to talk to you."

Jander's first reaction was to protest, still having an instilled fear that with his brother would come swift punishment for infringement on his space. It took conscious effort on Jander's part to walk to the door and open it, still keeping his hands from shaking. "What do you want?" His voice was clipped, with a slight wavering undertone of nervousness; they sounded strange to his ears. Even when he was angered at Zeke, he had never been this cold, but somehow, the words would not come any other way. However, all thoughts left him and were replaced with a blinding light when Zeke hit him, not overly roughly, but enough to send his senses momentarily reeling. Zeke entered and slammed the door behind him.

"Do you know where our parents are?" He asked, not letting Jander respond. "They've gone out, convinced by me that you're well. And you are- well enough." He approached, his walk menacing. "Why have you been avoiding me? I haven't done anything since you asked me not to." He narrowed his eyes, his gaze cold, though his voice showed the level at which he'd been hurt. Jander warily studied his brother; Zeke looked as if he had very little sleep, and the amount sustained was disturbed. He seemed agitated, but above that, deeply rejected.

"Zeke, I don't know how to act now." Jander responded with the same guarded voice and hooded eyes. With a quick change of demeanor, Zeke plopped down beside Jander, and put his arm around his shoulders in a friendly gesture. Jander stiffened, not wanting to move away, but not wanting such contact quite yet.

"Just think..." Zeke turned so he was looking Jander face-to-face. "... About me. Do you love me?"

Jander exhaled noisily, annoyed. "Not like that."

Zeke began to subtly rub Jander's back, leaning his head on his own knees to continue making eye-contact with his twin. "Aren't you even slightly attracted to me? I mean, you must think yourself fairly handsome."

"I... Um..." Jander took a moment to gather his wits, what little of them were left with Zeke rubbing his back like that. When he was about to say something remotely clever, Zeke silenced him with a soft lingering kiss to his mouth.

Jander pulled away, only after a moment's hesitation, his cheeks burning. Compulsively, he touched a finger to his moist lips, averting his eyes from his brother.

Zeke moved forward, crowding Jander against the post of his bunk bed. He crawled forward, kneeling very close, his face only inches from the other's, and his body pressed firmly against his twin's. Jander's will to fight slowly diminished. The heat from his brother's body was comforting, and his own cried for more than just shy kisses. But there was a persistent side of him that said proceeding would be wrong, despite how it would comfort his brother, make them both happy, draw them closer after so many years apart.

Save his life? Jander asked himself. He silently watched his brother's eyes, now dark with passion as he regarded his twin.

Having to deal with no protests due to Jander's sudden quietude, Zeke kissed the base of his jaw, nibbling lightly on his neck before returning to claim a rather eager mouth. He licked Jander's lips, parting them before exploring inside with his tongue. The other didn't respond in kind, remaining rather stiffly seated, but not protesting. Zeke pulled away, watching Jander reflexively lick his lips.

"What's the matter?" He asked, his voice low. He reached to cradle his brother's cheek in his hand, playing with the blond strands that fell there. "Aren't you enjoying this?" Zeke asked. After Jander showed no signs of response, he moved forward, nearly sitting his twin on his lap, running his hands under Jander's shirt, brushing lightly at his nipples. For the first time since Zeke had begun his ministrations, Jander broke his silence, unable to stop a low moan from escaping his lips.

"That answers my question just fine." Zeke mumbled, talking over his light kiss. Now infinitely encouraged, Zeke pushed Jander onto the bed, laying on top of him and pinning the other's hands with one of his own. Jander looked alarm, and was about to speak, but Zeke chose that moment to grind his hips against his twin's. Jander tried his best not to pant at the new sensation. He knew it was wrong, and was secretly hoping in desperation that his parents would come home and interrupt them, otherwise he would have to fend off Zeke, which was getting less plausible by the moment. Not only was he starting to want Zeke to continue, but his brother was not going to be so easily deterred after getting this far. Zeke continued to press his hips against Jander's, gyrating slightly, between passionately wet kisses. He snaked his free hand between them, moving to unfasten Jander's pants. Jander tensed as he felt Zeke's hand brush against his groin, unzipping his pants. Crashing back to the reality of the situation, Jander suddenly started to protest, lifting himself up, just to be sat upon again by Zeke.

"So you've come back to us." Zeke whispered, his breath tickling Jander's ear. "... I'll like it much better this way." The hand that had been hovering around his brother's pants now dove inside, caressing the warming flesh. "Mmmm... Do you like this, Jan?"

Jander squeezed his eyes shut, attempting to douse his arousal, but to no avail. His brother's hand stroked his shaft more quickly.

"Ahh- Zeke! Stop!" Jander freed his hands and pulled himself away from Zeke, who watched him with a bemused smile, looking as if he was the victor.

Once again fastening his pants, Jander bolted for the door, only to be stopped by a swift shin-trip by Zeke. "You'd think somebody who's so good at sports would know how escape." Zeke towered over his brother, leering.

Jander rubbed his leg, standing once again to be at eye-level with his twin. "I'm serious. Stop it. I don't like this."

Zeke pursed his lips for a moment, mocking being in deep pontification. "Well..." He started slowly. "You say that now... But when I have you begging for me to proceed, I'll know where everything stands."

Enraged and guilty that what his brother said was more than likely true if the situation came down to it, Jander swung at Zeke, hitting him hard against the mouth, cutting his lip. A tiny trickle of blood became a distinguishing mark- the two no longer mirrored the joyful and remorseful exactly.

Zeke wiped the blood off with the back of his hand. "So you're in the mood to fight?" He kicked Jander in the side and pushed him down, rolling forward until they hit a nearby wall with a crackling thud. Jander spun around to retaliate, but Zeke was already blocking, and grabbed Jander's outstretched arm, twisting it behind his back and pushing him face-up against the nearby wall. Jander groaned at the pain that shot up his arm, but would not call for mercy.

"Say it, Jan..." Zeke chided, pushing his brother's arm down. Jander clenched his teeth, but said nothing. "Oh, you're so stubborn... And to think you wanted to help me that first time..." Zeke ran his free hand down the front of Jander's pants once more.

Jander huffed and tried to pull away, only succeeding in making the grip Zeke had on his arm all the more painful.

"Let me go." He growled.

Zeke unbuttoned his brother's pants, letting them fall to the ground, leaving him in his boxers. "No." He said, pressing his groin to Jander's backside. "Hmm... You know how easily you could be at my disposal?" He breathed excitedly. "If you really want me to let you go, you'll have to beg."

Jander wasn't about to stoop so low, despite how hard he was growing at the sensation of Zeke's hand on his erection, and his brother's firmly ground against his ass.

The sound of Zeke unfastening his own trousers shattered any pride Jander had left. "Please, Zeke. Let me go!"

Zeke stopped disrobing, wearing only his half-fastened pants. "Oh? I don't think that's good enough." He pushed Jander forward, crushing him against the wall with his body.

"Please." Jander rasped, now finding it difficult to breath under the weight. His cheeks were burning with the knowledge of Zeke's plan. "Please, please... Let me go. Don't do it..."

"Don't do what?" Zeke asked, underscoring his question by dry-thrusting once.

"Don't screw me! Let me go!" Jander all but screamed.

Zeke leaned in close, closing his eyes, relishing the situation. "What will you do for me?"

Jander licked his lips. What did Zeke want? What was the proper answer? He had to think quickly. "W-whatever you want, just not that." Thankfully the hold loosened and Jander turned to face his brother, rubbing his arm. He stared at Zeke before him, shirtless, his arms crossed with a half-smile gracing his face.

He is handsome... Standing there... Like... That... Jander scolded himself bitterly for admitting his twin the least bit inviting; but it wasn't so much the realization of his attraction, it was the rather demanding sexual undercurrent. Not only was this his twin brother, but he had just physically assaulted Jander.

Wouldn't doing something now simply lead him to repeat the assault in future situations? Or maybe if I just do what he says... He'll not hurt me again. There has to be another alternative... Sleep with my twin? Take his beatings... Or admit this has been happening? Jander visibly shuddered at the last option. The aversiveness of childishly tattling was far more disturbing than anything his brother could concoct in his twisted mind.

"Well, being impatient, I'm calling in this favor while we have the chance to be alone." Zeke spoke slowly, while drawing the curtains. Now filtered, the sunlight bathed the room in an opaque orange glow. Jander regarded Zeke through the speckled twilight, scooting away in his seated position. Yes, he had agreed to appease Zeke, but it didn't mean he would jump at whatever fantasy his brother wanted fulfilled. Zeke didn't pursue Jander, he simply seated himself on the edge of the bed and surveyed the room. Obviously satisfied with whatever he found, he motioned to his brother. "Come here, then." He said, not in a menacing tone. Jander obeyed, slowly rising and sitting some distance away from Zeke.
"Closer." Zeke dictated.

Again, Jander did what he was told, sliding over so he was hip-to-hip with his brother.

"Now." Zeke lowered his voice seductively and slid his hand over Jander's. He moved his brother's hand to the fasten of his own pants. "... Take them off." After a moment of hesitation, Jander did as he was told, and slipped off Zeke's pants. He looked away, blushing, as he was met with Zeke's underwear, revealing he was already semi-erect. Zeke chuckled, again taking Jander's hand that had strayed away from his groin, and replacing it there. Jander ground his teeth together, trying his best not to think of the situation. Zeke, on the other hand, was making sure that his brother wouldn't miss a pulse of the occurrences.

"Those have to go too..." He murmured, watching Jander slowly strip him of his boxers. Without any prompting, Jander encircled Zeke's cock with his hand, stroking lightly. Zeke smiled, pleased, but also amused that his brother would attempt to distract him.

Jander is trying to get out of going down on me. Zeke's muffled laughter made Jander pale. Zeke slid his hand to the top of Jander's head, pushing his mouth toward his member. Jander shook his head, keeping his mouth closed, until a sharply painful tug at his hair made him slowly take Zeke's cock into his mouth. It was all Jander could do to not retch at the sensation and the taste; but most of all, the overpowering knowledge this was his brother. However, Zeke's firm hand assured he would never completely remove the member from his lips. Jander squinted his eyes shut, tears overflowing as he did so. Grudgingly, Jander sucked lightly, moving his head as little as possible without earning more assault on his hair.

After a few minutes, Zeke's hold slowly softened and he began uttering breathily. Despite the absence of his brother's confining hand, Jander did not stop. As he bobbed over the erection, he ran his tongue along it, finding himself strangely pleased as his brother threw his head back, gasping. The repetitive motion and lusty cries from Zeke enveloped Jander, the heat and sweat trailing down his neck made him lost in the situation. His own hand wandered to his groin where it stroked absently.

"Mmm... Jan... More..." Zeke managed through his panting. The thought of not complying didn't cross Jander's mind as he bowed his head even lower than before, sucking more fiercely. Another throaty cry from his twin made Jander's own erection pulse through his pants. His hand meandered within his underwear, and was now stroking quickly. Zeke cried out, thrusting his hips as he did so, coming close to release. His hand again tangled in Jander's hair, but this time in passion, rather than discipline.

A loud car door and the click of a lock shattered the moment, and sent Jander into a near panic attack as reality returned in full Technicolor.

"Oh my God... Oh my God... Mum n' dad are home!" He all but screeched. Zeke simply pulled on his boxers and pants as best he could and meandered to the window. He threw open the drapes, and sat on the sill, turned away from Jander's panicked attempt at getting dressed.

"Good... Lord..." Came Jander's staccato utterance. Zeke turned to where his brother had been standing motionless for the past few seconds, a strangely blank look on his face.

"I think I'm going to be ill!" He exclaimed, covering his mouth with his hand in an almost comical gesture as he ran to the bathroom.

Zeke simply raised an eyebrow. "Damn. So close, too."



Jander tore into the frigid bathroom, slamming the door heavily behind him. He fell to his knees before the toilet, for all the world believing he would vomit. His mouth was full of Zeke's taste; a salty coating that slicked his teeth and tongue, rising bitter bile to his throat. Jander griped the cool porcelain, leaning over his dim reflection in the water. Minutes passed before he was able to stand, and look himself in the mirror. His cheeks were still flushed, his hair matted with sweat to the sides of his face, and his lips redly swollen from overuse. Jander turned the cold faucet on abruptly, washing his face and hands. When he tilted his head once again to meet the mirror's scrutiny, tears were spilling unchecked, plummeting to join the collected water in the sink.


Viger Persinger, March 2001. Replication of this page layout, its contents and ideas is strictly forbidden under penalty of law.