Fuck
Mood:  caffeinated
Now Playing: Jam Project- Break Out

Haha fuck. Figured that I had to at least put this somewhere, since telling anyone I know would probably start a huge shitstorm.

First of all, I'm not going to college or university
Why?
I've pretty much given up on all the shit that I wanted to do. I've failed math twice in high school and I'm fucking sick of having to take it. Suppousedly univ/college wants people to have taken up to Algebra 2, but seriously, fuck that! I failed Integrated math 3 pretty hard and I don't fucking want to take another class, let alone math that will make me lose sleep at night.
A few months back I at least had a optimistic view like "Well I can take classes to become a French translator! That wouldn't be too bad." Buuuut~ after getting a shitty D in English 3 and the previously mentioned math problems, getting accepted into a college/univ is pretty much nigh impossible.

Fuck it, whatever.

 I'm thinking about moving in with my granny after high school's over with. At least with her I know that she won't kick me out, lol. I wouldn't just be a lazy ass like my uncle, but I'd clean up the inside of her house (and even try to fix some of it) and take care of her yard (fucking huge, so it needs it) as well as organize and throw away shit in the garages, shed, and the attic.

But that's just an idea. It sure would be nice if that really happend.

Otherwise, I'm stuck at my parents and they're stuck with a young adult who doesn't want to do anything with their life anymore.

Maybe I should take my meds. They might help, but I  hear that the shit actually makes people violent and changes their personality entirely. 

Wow.
Mood:  sharp
Topic: Friends that're annoying
I never did really imagine I would grow to dislike so many people that I once enjoyed being around. Sarah, a few months ago, was someone who I did enjoy being in the presence of. Silver, Keii, Kit, and Coll are my interenet friends that I regularily hang out with whenever I'm on. Of course, I still talk to Akura and other people along with my real life friends. Moreso, overtime, I can't stand being around some people that I did once like.

Sarah, for example, has become absolutely uncontrollable. She's still the easiest read EVER in attitude, mood, and what she's preparing to say. Part of that contributes to why being around her has turned...sour in recent times. Just now, she's starting to read and learn about the "Tales of" game series...which is something myself and others around her have talked about non-stop during previous time periods. I only get to talk to her before 3rd period starts and if I go to a Gamenight, but these boring, lifeless, and mediocre converstations that we share about "Tales of" or ANYTHING in general is a complete chore, and something that I am personally GLAD to end ASAP.

Next up are my online friends. Keii, Kit, and Coll, I have NO qualms about at all. Silver, though, I can't say the same. Once she's stuck on one fandom, I will NEVER hear the end of it. I understand that I myself do "X" or "omg x" for some period of time about a series of anything. Silver isn't like one of the crazy fangirls you meet at school, but the consistant babbling and refusal to engage in conversation or to simply keep "Darren Shan" out of a conversation grinds in EXTREMELY quickly. Keii and I, for a little while have resorted in starting conversations in seaperate windows so we don't talk about Xenosaga or Persona 3 for example, so that we don't talk too long about a series of games/anime that Silver isn't interested in. Silver, though, won't have it at all. She has absolutely NO decency to what I do and do not want to talk about in a shared MSN or AIM chat conversation. Constantly, over and over, ALWAYS. She has to speak of Darren Shan. I'm sick of it. I know that I told her I'd try to be less of a prick this year/in general, but her attitude does NOT HELP in the least. If anything, she's helping it grow after I actually let it shrink. If I'm speaking of a "DS," naturally, since I don't have a MASSIVE love of Darren Shan, I'm talking about a NINTENDO DS. Everytime I mention "DS" in her presence, though, she always thinks of it as "Darren Shan." Even without the "DS" abbreviation device, EVERYTHING is turned into babble about Darren Shan. I WOULD say something to her, then she could produce a counter example, but I could produce a better one, however...this will put an even worse strain on our relationship than the one that currently exists.

For now, though, I got lucky and was able to remember this blog's URL, password, and screen name, so not EVERYTHING on the internet is going badly. Seriously, if anything, Akura and a few others (like Insoo) are helping me keep the shred of internet sanity I have. Thanks, guys, even though I don't talk to either of you very often, I still love y'all more than the day we met or the times when we talked the most...<3

Explainin Crap
Mood:  on fire
Now Playing: Old Fire Emblem music
Topic: Explainin Somethin
What's up, guys? How's it been goin for you since my long-ass time of non-updating? Bah. No one reads thisn blog anyway XD. I got all kinds of bored and made it to be the blog in which i rant about things. And, uh. I bet you figured that out a long time ago. Anyways, I'll be postin' more about how people piss me off and stuff later, k? Right now I'm turning in for greater justice.

God of Crapping
Mood:  d'oh
Now Playing: Your Mom + Crap
Topic: Friends that're annoying
Hey all. This time is the rant to show up all my prick friends over at Bay High School. Yes, I just released the name of my high school. Don't care much though. Alright. First is first. Well, not really. Sarah, who is considered my "opposite/other half" has a really disgusting house. I'm sorry, everyone, but it's true. Her house smells like fucking dogs and birds, which it does contain. That smell, of course is NOT a nice thing to walk into as a guest and is made even worse with the shit thrown all over the ground. Throughout her house, (which you can obviously tell it's lived in) there's various piles of DIRTY fucking laundry thrown EVERYWHERE, although mainly focused near/ IN the damn bathrooom. The bathroom itself is in horrible condition. The sink is ungodly old, rusty and broken up, a sight that you would hardly want to wash your hands in, let alone do anything else in. The whole room smells of course, of dog, and the cursed dirty laundry which inhabits it, showing it has yet to be CLEANED since they first moved in. Living in filth that I have so far discribed is unclean, disgusting, and would upset even the most modest of people. Going into the rooms, which aren't entirely small, but moderately small, they're a mess themselves. Sarah's room- which she claims that she cleans sometimes (or never) is probably the most gross part aside from the dirty clothing. Her room is about the size or even bigger than MY room- and i live in a house, not a trailer. but she's got so much furniture shit that there's only a small bit of room to move around in. That piece of room itself isn't even maintained. It's barely vaccumed, so crumbs from chips and god knows what else are scattered about everywhere.


--Continuable later.--

Holy Shits of Ranting
Mood:  suave
Now Playing: Violent Pornography- System of a Down
Topic: Annoying Band Obsessive
Jun, A.K.A. Misty-chan returned very briefly from her home in South Carolina to rejoin Sakura-chan and I for her birthday. (Although a whole week before her actual birthday)SOO I went down to Sakura-chan's house last weekend on Saturday and well, the reunion wasn't the best or happiest reunion I ever had with a friend. (Actually friends, cause I don't go to school with Sakura-chan anymore.] Bay Student!]]) Fuck, I've had better reunions with rivals and relatives that I ever loathe to all hell. Okay, I'll start from Thursday.


Brittney loves me enough to move up Game night from Saturday to Friday so I can join in on the festivities instead of missing them. I'm happy because I can watch Joshy-chan play his RE4 on his Game Cube. So then, Friday I go to Brittney's house and have like...fucking loads of fun. Screaming, (Fake) crying, laughing, perverted jokes, horrible Mary Kate and Ashley prank...it was awesome. I couldn't spin the night though, and was a little down about it =/; But that wasn't the only thing that made me unhappy BEFORE the reunion. I bought Sarah Jak X for her birthday and finally brought it right when I left. (It was already weeks since her birthday) Sarah was extremely happy, cried, hugged, and squealed even after I left to go to Sam and Jono's house.

Over at Sam and Jono's I had a fucking load of fun as well, though. We all watched Get Backers DVD 10 (End of the series) and went "WTFWTJFJHF OMFG YAY!!!!" when it came to the cuddle of Ban and Ginji at the last second. Happy and hyper about that. We (Angie and I) got presents from Sam and Jono, which I loved, but sounded unenthused. (>_< damn you monotone!)

Angie sister drove back home when we were finished at Sam and Jono's, me worrying about having to sit the whole next day through J-Rock videos and "OMG MIYAVI THIS…DIRU THAT..." that kind of junk. Don't get me wrong, I absolutely love Dir En Grey and J-Rock. But when your "best friend(s)" puts you through that for the whole fucking day, YOU will NOT like it at all. Especially because I've been playing video games like people have sex (Nymphs, anyway o-o;; ) and only like J-Rock on my own terms. I went to bed immediately after returning, still dreading J-Rock Videos and Fan girl-ism.

Saturday

God fucking wants to know why the fuck I hang out with Sakura-chan and loves me enough to grant me miss some of the torment of sitting in Sakura's room, so I sleep for longer than I was "suppoused to". After loving me for a brief moment, he hates me when I wake for a shitty-ass weekend. (Saturday and Sunday)

Hells of Jenova awaken when I arouse from sleepy land. I wake...halfway disoriented and quickily try going back to bed, which by much, is a better land to inhabit. Mom tells me Michelle called and I shrug then sit down and stare into space.

1 Hour or something later
Nobody was home, cept' me myself and I. My ass quarters resided on the livingroom couch for my brain was watching G4. Filter was on and it was counting down the recent goriest games. I had called Sakura back and shit so I was just watching it and freaked out when ...RESIDENT EVIL 4 GOT FUCKING FIRST PLACE FOR GORIEST GAME!!! HOLY SHIT!!! Leon~~ <3; So I was happy...then got re-unhappy cause of ...J-Rock videos.

Too lazy, blah, blah, skipping to Sakura-chan's house

So my mom goes ahead and takes me over to the dreaded home, only for me to discover that...

Andrea and that one chick are gonna be hanging out/spending the night as well.

Ohohohoho. Don't even fucking try to make me feel better now. That had to be the first thing that set me off as soon as I got there.


--More Later. Right Now, I gotta go and do other things.--

Lolita Complexes and How To Destroy Them
Mood:  irritated
Alright. So you know how there are these kids out on the streets and what-not wearing dark baggy clothes now-a-days, yeah? Well, if you've said yes to that bit, then you might know what I'm talking about right now. Okay, so Lolita is really popular all over Japan and what not, right? And you know how people always associate "people wearing lots of black" to be goth. Well, a lot of people consider Lolita to be the bastard spin-off of "New Age Gothic" clothing. They have all the right to believe so, too! Mainly because Lolita is really "Gothic Lolita" Bah, but i didn't write this to educate you on something you knew already! Anyways, a lot of young people are extremely obsessed with this clothing style. Hell, in Japan, it's got it's own damn magazine. Even more than just one as well. The other day (yes, my life somehow fits in with this "lolita" I speak of.) I was browsing ebay (Me being an ebayer and all) when i found a Hong Kong seller, selling the cosplay clothes they worked hard to make. Of course, me liking the manga series "D. Gray-Man" I found and clicked on one of their costumes for the series (Allen or possibly Kanda's) and sent the link to a friend who is annoyingly obsessed with Lolita. (On an unrelated note, she always claims to know about things before you and treats you like a total moron about those things, and of course, invokes my wrath, but I try to keep quiet about my aggrivation towards her actions.) As soon as the picture for the costume loaded,she automatically replied [over instant messenger] that it "looks aristrocratic lolita". Oh god. Scroll up and leave it there. She didn't type that to me. Needless to say now, that her accusations annoyed me. Since when were black and white in a Exorcist coat look "Gothic Lolita." Really, dude, really. I'm freaking sick of lolita freaks. Especially since they don't exaclty know what it means.
Breif rundown of the Japanese definition of "Gothic Lolita":

Young. Teenage. High. School. Girls.
A - N - D
OLD SMELLY MEN

......

Hooking up

No, I'm not kidding you. The act of Lolita in Japan is pretty much High school chicks getting shacked up with older men who already have WIFES! So, everyone out there, FORGET LOLITA. GET OVER IT, AND GET OVER IT QUICK- IT'S NOT WHAT YOU TIHNK IT IS. Yeah. Well, this made me feel better. Possibly because of my pent-up aggrivation over the whole "I know everything about anything Japanese/ involving dark clothing" my friend always pulls off. A lot of viewers would probably wonder why I waste time with people like that, but meh, I'm used to her precense and I do not wish to piss her off and get me pissed as well. Thanks for reading this shit, though!

Much poo

---Haru I.

Oh, by the way, I'm fucking obsessed with Megaman (Rockman) at the moment. Here's a special picture for you. There you go, dude.

New Blog o_o
Mood:  on fire
Now Playing: Malice Mizer-Illuminati
Ahh~ New blog! This time it's angelfire XD; Welll~ I need to fix this up to have GS/GS-D related backgrounds and all, but I'll do that later, after all, school's starting on the 4th >>;; Ja ne, minna-san!

Haru I