Crying to the Walls Part 3
Later that night, Heero stumbled up to his and Duo's apartment, after Johnson drove him back home. His shoulders were slumped, his walking stiff and slow, his lips swollen and cracked, dry blood gathered at the edges of his mouth.
Reaching down a trembling hand, Heero unlocked the door and staggered into the dark apartment. None of the lights were turned on, and the place was washed with pale moonlight. It was quiet and empty, making Heero shiver at the thought of being alone. Sighing, he turned on the lights.
"Hey!" A voice suddenly called, sounding quite angry.
Heero flinched and turned to look at the couch. Duo was now sitting there, one hand over the back of the sofa. His hair was a mess; his shirt undone and his eyes narrow with anger.
"Heero! What the fuck are you doing here?! Weren't you supposed to be on a date or something?!"
Heero swallowed and bowed his head. "I'm sorry. But we just--" He was stopped short by the sight of another figure rising up from the couch. It was a young woman, a beautiful young woman, her appearance as messy and lustful as Duo's. Heero blushed when he saw her shirt was partly open as well. He swallowed and bowed his head. "I'm sorry for interrupting you."
Duo snorted. "Don't be sorry! Just go already!"
Again Heero flinched, ducking his head between his shoulders. "H-hai." He stammered and ran over to the hallway, his head still bowed. He heard Duo sigh and turn off the lights again, apologizing to the girl.
Heero sniffled and blinked away the tears.
"I'm sorry..."
* * *
In the shower, he scrubbed himself hard, trying to cleanse his body from Johnson's touch. He rubbed and scrubbed until his skin was burning red. He then just stood under the running water, leaned his head against the white porcelain wall, and cried.
Why was Duo with a girl? And such a beautiful girl too... Is that why Duo didn't like him anymore? Because he wasn't a girl? It wasn't his fault he was born a male. If he could have, he would have changed it. He would do anything... anything for Duo...
But no matter what he will do, he'll never be as beautiful and pure as that girl. What was it that Johnson called him? Meine Hure. My whore. That's what he was. As dirty and tainted as a street whore. Duo definitely deserved better.
He stepped out of the shower, wiping away his tears. He stopped by the mirror and looked at himself.
//"You're a very good looking man, Heero. You must have seen how people here gawk at you."//
"Then why don't you look at me..? Duo..." He whispered longingly. One look at his ravished lips had answered that question.
Heero whimpered and reached up a trembling hand, brushing carefully against his cracked lips.
Suddenly, he felt hot and nauseous, bile climbing up to his throat. He gulped and hurried to lean over the sink. He gagged, vomiting, but he hadn't eaten anything, so he had nothing to empty.
Exhausted, Heero whimpered weakly and washed his mess. He staggered out of the bathroom, and headed to his bedroom. On his way, he managed to catch the sounds of Duo and his date coming from the living room.
He threw himself on the large, cold, bed and curled up into a fetal position. He pulled the covers as high as his neck, shivering. He closed his eyes, trying hard to escape reality and sleep, but the noises coming from the living room were too much. Duo's laughter... Duo's moans... Duo's voice... Duo's joy...
"Duo..." Heero whimpered, turning in his bed. He reached for Duo's pillow, which he hadn't washed since the two of them broke up. He hugged the cushion tightly, burying his tear-stained face in the soft pillow.
"I'm sorry, Duo..." He cried, pressing trembling fingers over his bruised lips. He brushed his fingers over the wounded lips, more tears welling in his eyes. He inhaled deeply, letting himself be engulfed by Duo's smell. He kept weeping into the pillow, stroking his ravished lips.
"He touched me, Duo... He touched me..."
* * *
"Ne, are you two going out again tonight?" Duo asked, smirking. He was sitting propped on the back of a chair, looking up at Heero.
Heero looked away from his computer screen, blinking. "Who told you that?"
Duo's smirk only grew. "Call it intuition. Well, that and the fact that Johnson had been bragging about it all around section six."
Heero's eyes widened, and then narrowed in anger. He turned back to his computer screen, and continued typing. "I agreed to no such date."
Duo pouted and then sighed. "And why is that, may I ask?"
"Because."
"Because?"
"Because I have a lot of work to do."
"Oh. You're gonna stay in late?" Duo asked, though he wasn't buying it.
"Aa."
"Here?"
"Aa."
"Alone?"
"...Aa."
Duo smirked. "Okey doky! Have it your way..." With that, he got up and left.
Heero looked up at the closed door, frowning.
* * *
Later that night, the Preventers office was nearly empty. Only a few workaholics were still there, including Heero. He was sitting in his dark and silent office, typing some reports. He let his mind focus only on the job, not letting it wonder to other well-charted places that brought only gloom and misery.
Suddenly, his mind registered a sound coming from outside his office.
Frowning, Heero's hands left the keyboard. He looked warily at the door. He then got up and slowly walked over to the door. He peeked out carefully, senses alert. Only then did he recognize the sounds as a soft and pleasant melody, echoing silently through the dark hall of office cubicles.
Soft flickering lights illuminated the place with dim orange light. Looking carefully, Heero could see a few candles sparkling, casting dancing shadows over the walls.
Confused, Heero scanned the place once more, searching for the one responsible for this. All of a sudden, the volume was turned up, and he looked at the direction of the sound. He could now see a silhouette, standing a few meters away. It was dancing slowly to the soft music, slowly walking towards Heero.
"Duo?" Heero asked, hopeful. The silhouette didn't answer, but Heero remembered the way Duo looked that afternoon, like he was planning something. His eyes shone with joy and he smiled happily. "Duo!"
"Uh uh. Guess again." A deep voice now answered.
The smile disappeared from Heero's hopeful face. "J-Johnson?"
"That's right, meine Blume (1)." The man answered and stepped out of the shadows, revealing his smirking face.
"Wha-what are you d-doing here?" Heero stammered, staggering back.
"A small bird whispered to me that my little flower was hiding around here." His eyes narrowed. "While it should be out, having a good time."
"With... with you?"
Johnson smirked again. "And since you can't go out on a date, I decided to bring the date here, to you." He gestured at a near desk. Heero turned to look at it and was surprised to see a meal for two and a bottle of cool champagne. He turned back to look at Johnson, shocked.
"This is for... us?"
Johnson's smile grew. "Us. I love the way you say it..." He approached the stunned boy, reaching two hands down and holding the boy by his waist. He pulled Heero closer to him, grinning. "What do you say, blume, do you think you can take a small break for me?"
Still embraced tightly, Heero looked at the meal. He noticed that there wasn't one bit of meat in it. He looked back up at Johnson and smiled. He did have a LOT of work to do, but... "Maybe a small break won't hurt..."
Johnson smiled and kissed him passionately. "That's right, meine Hure..."
* * *
Time seemed to go on so fast; it made it hard to catch up with events. It's been nearly two months since Duo fixed the date between his roommate and Johnson, and the two were still seeing each other. Needless to say, the braided boy was very proud of his matchmaking skills. He was happy for Heero. He was happy that the boy had gotten over their break-up and finally moved on. By what heard around the office, Johnson was happy as well. And the two sure seemed like they were a good couple, though nothing was official yet. They weren't officially lovers or boyfriends. But Duo wasn't worried. He knew how long it takes when it comes to Heero. Heero can't be rushed when it comes to sharing his life with someone. Hell, it took Duo about two years. Johnson should be given some sort of an award for managing to get so close to Heero in such a short time. They must get along great.
Or so it seemed. Events tend to get twisted in office rumors. The truth can sometimes be as far as possible from what people were seeing. For one thing, people have been talking a lot about the fact that Johnson seemed to be leaving section six more and more often, climbing up to the tenth floor, where Heero's office was located. The two were always seen together on lunchtime, Johnson always drove Heero home at the end of the day. If Heero had to stay extra hours, Johnson would wait for him. If Heero was out on a field mission, Johnson would always find a way to switch with some other section six officer and go with him. The two were never separated. Wherever Heero was, Johnson was as well.
In some ways, it was disturbing, but no one could blame Johnson for wanting to be so close to the beautiful boy. And others couldn't blame Heero for staying with Johnson. The women in the office were dying for the same affection the German man was showing. Nearly each time he came up to Heero's office, he would carry some sort of gift with him. Flowers, chocolates and other treats and presents. He was so kind and giving, and his charm didn't go unnoticed around the tenth floor office cubicles.
The said man was walking up that same floor, heading towards a familiar door at the end of the hall. Various gazes followed him, followed by smiles at the sight of a large package he was carrying, warped in colorful paper. They followed him with their gazes until he reached the office door, and then looked away, whispering to each other.
Johnson stood before Heero's door, clutching the package tightly. He smiled sly to himself, and knocked.
There was no answer.
Johnson frowned. He looked down at his wristwatch. It was five thirty in the afternoon. Heero was supposed to be in his office. He was ALWAYS in his office at this hour. He knew where his love was supposed to be in EACH and EVERY hour of the day, and he should be in his office!
"Shit!" The blond German cursed and stomped his foot on the floor. He looked around, eyes narrowing. He didn't see Heero anywhere in the office floor. Johnson's foot began tapping angrily on the floor. He looked at his watch again, and then at the elevator. But Heero was still nowhere in sight.
He sighed and turned back to the door. He tested it and saw that it was locked. Looking around to make sure no one sees him, Johnson leaned all of his weight on the door, and, using both hands, he twisted the round knob until it cracked and broke. The door was unlocked.
Smirking, he let himself in.
* * *
"Une wants these reports by tomorrow morning, and we still didn't get the forensics for the Anataxia case." A voice was heard from behind the door.
"I'll get right on it." Heero's voice answered and a few ruffled papers could be heard.
Johnson straightened in Heero's office chair.
"But tell Shelly that if the system crashes one more time, she'll have to answer to Une, because I don't have time to fix it each time she punches the wrong codes in. She should stop depending on others to cover up for her problems."
"Yes sir." The voice answered and then the person walked away.
Johnson looked up at the door as he heard the knob being turned. A sly smile crept to his lips, his eyes shining with a wild gleam.
Sighing deeply, Heero walked through the door, carrying a few papers. His back was facing Johnson, and he was rubbing the back of his neck tiredly.
"Hard day?"
The papers fell to the floor and Heero flinched, startled. He whirled around, and his eyes widened. "Johnson?! How'd y--how did you get in?"
"Through the door?" The man offered, getting up.
Heero sighed again. "Very funny. It's a breach of protoc--"
"Where have you been?"
"What?"
Johnson sighed and shook his head in disappointment. "Where. Have. You. Been?" He demanded, approaching Heero with threatening steps.
Heero swallowed, bowing his head under the man's glare. "In a meeting."
"Upstairs?"
"Aa."
"Wearing this?"
Heero's head snapped up. "Wha-what?!" He saw Johnson eyeing him up and down in disgust. He fidgeted a little, now feeling very self-conscious. He looked down at himself, straightening his clothes. He was wearing the standard issue, black, trousers along with an off-white, loose, tank top. He had left his jacket somewhere in the office before he went up to the top floor. The shirt was quite revealing, exposing his smooth chest and muscled arms.
Johnson snorted and rolled his eyes. "You wanna tell me that you went up there looking like... this?!"
Heero swallowed again. "It's hot. The air conditioning doesn't work up there."
Again the man rolled his eyes. "Bull. It works down here, doesn't it? But then it doesn't bother you to wear these things day after day..."
Heero looked up at him, eyes wide. "What's wrong with what I wear? It's comfortable and it's--"
"Trashy." Johnson spat.
Heero gasped, clearly hurt.
Johnson's smirk grew. "Look at you! No wonder people have been talking about you so much. The way you sell out your body like this... it's disgusting!"
"But I don't do it on pur--"
"Oh please!" The man said, rolling his eyes again. "Don't you think I heard what people around here say about you?! Don't you think I've seen them put their filthy eyes on you? When they have no right, because you're with me. Or have you forgotten that?"
"Oh no. No. Of course not..."
Johnson smirked. "Good." He turned back to Heero's desk and picked up the package he had brought. Tearing the wrapping brutally, he turned back to face Heero.
Heero watched him, confused, as he tore the package open, and pulled out something out of it.
"A gift." The German said gently, handing Heero a long sleeved shirt. A very UGLY long sleeved shirt.
Heero took it hesitantly, looking up at Johnson, his eyes shimmering with uncertainty. "You want me to wear... this?"
Johnson smiled and nodded. "Yes. I picked it up myself. I think it will suit you."
"Oh, I don't know..." Heero tried to avoid. While he didn't have such a great fashion sense, he knew that this was just NOT right...
"C'mon, try it." It was not a request. With Johnson, it never was.
Sighing in defeat, Heero put the shirt on. He knew that arguing would only get Johnson mad, and that would do him little good. Yeah, sure, the man was sometimes very kind and loving, but sometimes, he was very angry and cruel. He would compliment him enough to keep him happy and feel good, yet criticize him enough to keep him insecure. He would say things that made him feel good, but do things that made him feel bad. He was so hard to figure out. And when Heero tried to carefully confront him about it, Johnson would burst and say that he always tries to pick up a fight, that he doesn't treat him well, that it's his entire fault. He would twist EVERYTHING Heero had said, putting all the blame for their troubles on him. He would seem so energized when they fought, while it only made Heero feel exhausted. And when he threatened to leave him, Heero would always fall quiet and ask for forgiveness. He couldn't bear the thought of being abandoned again.
It was scary, the way Johnson presented such a wonderful face to the world and at the same time, be a dangerous, mood-swinging monster.
"Well, Blume? Do you like it?"
Heero looked down at the tight and uncomfortable shirt in distaste. He looked up at Johnson, smiling weakly. "Aa."
"Good then. Take your jacket, we're going out for dinner."
"What?!"
"You heard me."
"Yes, I... I did, but, I... I still have a lot of work to do..."
"Chk! Work, work, work... It's always work with you. Live it up a little bit! C'mon!"
"Yeah, but... I mean, I have to... the reports..."
"Heero." Johnson spoke his name harshly. He stepped forward and grabbed Heero's hands in his. He looked down at the boy, his gaze sharp. "You always complain that you don't get to do what you like. Why do you think it's like that? Because you're so up tight! Because you're always stuck up here in this damn office! Go out, live a little! I planned to meet up with some friends tonight, and you're gonna be there."
"But Une wants the reports by morning..."
"Une can stuff it." Johnson spat. "C'mon, you said we never do anything fun, so tonight we will."
Heero sighed deeply and bowed his head. "Okay. Just let me pack my things."
It was amazing how the man managed to twist everything that he said.
TBC…
1) My flower