Well, life had other plans. I stopped going to CCD halfway through my second year, and don't have an associates degree. I worked for two and a half years, and now that I'm heading back to college I'm looking at the ones that really interest me, the ones that would challenge me, where I'll be happy. I'm definitely applying to Yale, Reed, and Cooper Union. All of these schools REQUIRE SAT or ACT test scores. I haven't been in high school for five years now, and I need to brush up to even begin to think about getting into these schools.
The worst part of it all is I am not that good at math. It seems I have a talent for it, which is a real shame, because I haven't actually worked at math for years. When I was in the third grade, I had an absolutely awful teacher, Mrs. Bowman. I just skipped a grade, and was put in the fast-track program. While I was ahead of my class in most things, I just didn’t know some things, like how to multiply and divide. So she tried to teach me, and I wasn't getting it how she was telling me. She finally slammed her hands down on the table in front of me, and said "It's not like you'll need math anyway, you're a GIRL." and I turned to her, with a steely jaw and said "Fine, then I won't do math!"
Little did Mrs. Bowman know, but I am one of the most stubborn people on the planet. I did not put any effort into doing math until I turned 14, and then I busted ass to catch up. Sadly, my teacher during that period of time wasn't good at math, and ended up confusing me more than helping me. This means that I'm solid, but slow, on multiplication and shaky on division, and most of algebra leaves me behind, but when my friend who works on Hubbell showed me some calculus, I picked it up right away. Higher math fascinates me, I want to know how it works and I want to understand the universe. I want to see what only Physics can show me, I want to understand velocities and how calculus works, how a simple set of math can be so elegant and powerful at the same time. I want to understand the beauty in numbers, the way I understand the beauty of a painting, or poetry. I know the artistry is there, I know the elegance and clarity are there, if only I learn how to see it. I am not capable of appreciating it at this point. I know I can be good at math, given half a chance at some decent teachers and some effort on my part.
In order to get into the caliber of schools I want to get into, I have to learn all of high school mathematics in less than six months. In order to satisfy my desire for knowledge, I am learning other nifty things alongside algebra for the next six months. So, off I go now to study more math.
I never thought I would say that and be happy about it!
