My name is Brian Littrell. Affectionally known as B-Rok to my friends. I'm a member of a successfull group. A heathrob to thousands of adoring fans. I'm married to a wonderfull woman. I seem to have the perfect life. But if you look behind the eyes do I really? My life is full of shadows and secerts. Secerts that could destroy the group, my friends, my marriage. You see I'm not the straight arrow I claim to be. I'm gay. Gay and in love with my best friend. I never planned it. I mean the day I married Leigh I told myself I had given up my secret gay life forever. I meant it too. But meaning it and actually doing it are two different things. I thought I had things under control. Sure I loved him but I had never once acted on that love. At least not until that fatefull day that would start the un-raviling of my secrets and change all of our lives forever.

"Would you stop" said Howie glaring at Nick.

"What?"

"Jiggling your foot up and down. Can't you sit still for two seconds. I swear your more like a little kid everyday" said Howie.

"Little kid, I don't see you complaining when we're in bed. I'm not such a little kid then, am I" said Nick.

"Your getting off the point" said Howie.

"You know, your one to talk. You always wagging your finger." said Nick.

"I am not" said Howie.

"Yes you are. You wag when you sit, you wag when you eat. Wag, wag. That's all you do" said Nick.

"Are you two fighting" said Brian.

"No" shouted Nick.

"Their not fighting. They go at each other like this all the time then they have hot sex and fall asleep" said AJ.

"What do you do have your ear pressed to the wall" said Howie..

"I don't have too. They way you two go at it they could hear you in China. What do you do to him that makes him scream like that anyway" said AJ.

"Can we..."

"I can tell you what he does" said Nick smiling.

"Not one word, Frack. Not one friggin word" said Howie.

"What, I was just going to tell him how we."

"Come on Howie you can tell us, what is it" said AJ attempting to pout.

"I know what it is" said Brian turning to AJ.

"You, how could you know what..."

"It's death by Howie" said Brian.

"What." said Kevin raising an eyebrow as he looked up from his book.

"Death by Howie. The way he looks at you with those eyes that makes you want to shove him against the wall and devour him" said Brian.

"Something your not telling us Brian" said AJ smiling.

"No I, umm..." said Brian stammering.

"You don't have to be ashamed Brian. We all love you" said Nick kissing Brian on the cheek.

"Cut it out will you" said Brian annoyed.

"You know if you wanted me all you had to do was ask" said Howie smiling.

"Guy's leave him alone" said Kevin.

"So back to what you do to Nick" said AJ.

"Can we stop talking about my sex life" said Howie growing irritated.

"We can talk about AJ's. Oh, wait he dosen't have any" said Nick smiling.

"That was low" said AJ.

"Hey, just stating a fact" said Nick. "You know, you could always do Brian" said Nick.

"I'm straight" said Brian.

"Hey, their's a first time for everything" said Nick.

"I don't think so" said Brian nervously.

"What's the matter don't think you could handle me" said AJ smiling seductively.

"You think you all know me. I could handle everyone in this room and not bat an eye. You don't know me. None of you do" snapped Brian shoving the chair under the table.

"Hey, it was just a joke" said AJ.

"A joke. A joke would be my life" said slamming the door as behind him.