I'll be honest. Assholes piss me off..... But..... They are also a great source of amusement in one way or the other.
Here are some traits off assholes, just so I don't have to write them out on every asshole account I've made here...
AAF=Annoying as Fuck
BW=Brick Wall (Which means they cannot be reasoned with)
SV=Vocabulary Shortened. Usually goes no further than the words "fucker" and "motherfucker."
JPS=Just Plain Stupid
I=Irony is involved.
NR=No Respect for ANYONE Else
MML=The incident involving the star asshole made me laugh.
The Guy in the Parking Lot... H, SV, NF, I, MML
The first, I have *drumroll please* The Guy in the Parking Lot!!! One day, not long ago, I was in the school parking lot waiting for my mother to pick me up. This was when I witnessed an interesting spectacle. I'm standing there minding my own business when I hear a man yelling. My curiosity, as usual, wins me over, and I looked to see what was going on. I see a man (the one screaming) get out of his car, and up to the window of another car two guys were driving. Here is what apparently happened, as I gathered from screaming man's screaming after i'd managed to weed out all of the "fucks." The guys in the car "weren't paying enough goddamned attention" and backed into his car. (Actually, as it turns out, they didn't. Their car didn't even touch his.) So, there he was, in the face of one of the poor guys in the car, calling him every name in the book, also using the words "fucker" and "motherfucker" WAY more than enough times. Loud enough for anyone in the vicinity of the parking lot to hear, too. Well, while the guy was yelling at the driver..... LOBSTER CAM TIME!!! He turned redder than red! Redder than my father figure when he's mad! And THAT'S red!! While this was all going on, Stevenson security was even out there inspecting the "damage" and trying to get the guy to calm down/clam it.
There is also irony involved with this incident. I remember one thing in particular that Lobster Man said that I found to be very funny, it was so ironic. In the midst of his turning bright red, yelling every word in the book at some innocent guys and so on... He yelled loudly, "What kind of asshole are you?" It too up ALL of my willpower to not go up the Lobster Man and laugh right in his face.
Exhibit B: Two certain males in my US History class, by the name of Patrick and Mark(Uniball). H, VW, SV, JPS, NR, E/H, A, MML.
I have the intense displeasure of having to sit next to the Patrick one, who sits there being a dick and shaking his desk incessantly *ARRRRRGGGGGHHH* Then, there is the "Mark" thing, whom I hate with a burning passion. He's the one who sits there heckling everything and everyone. If the teacher says something, he heckles. (The teacher then turns right around mocks "Mark's" heckling. Tis funny.) Where was I going with this? Damn...
Drugs are bad, Mmmkay?