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Meager Meanderings

 

You're my Sacred Jezebel
The Devil and the Saint
I'm your crucifixion
Burn me with your loving hate
Your enigma, my stigmata
And my blood pooled on the floor
Locked inside our mindgame
More deadly than a war



You're my Sacred Jezebel
Worse than little Alice with her knife
As you're slicing up my soul
You're tearing up my life
Yet like a pilgrim to Jerusalem
To your alter I am drawn
Stumbling through your darkness
But cursing at the dawn

Do you hurt me because I know the secrets
    you've got buried deep within?
Do you hurt me just to try to let me
    know that somehow you care?
Do you hurt me when you love me because
    you know you're veil is wearing thin?
Or do you simply hurt me since I'm
    the only one that's there?

Yeah, you're my Sacred Jezebel
More precious than my life
You, my Sacred Jezebel
Cloaked in eternal night
And every time I come to worship
At the altar of your bed
You take another piece of me
Use me up; left for dead

And as the dawn approaches
And you make your getaway
I know that I'll live for you
Again for one more day....

"Sacred Jezebel"
Dalamar Mauvais

 

 

A firestorm. A flashflood. All these things and more. A demon swept my soul away. Left it bleeding, bruised, and torn Like a junkie with a needle. Like a suicide with his knife. Like a candle with a dampened flame. Like the Hangman holds my life. Like walking on a spider's web. Like swimming a tumultuous sea. All these things and more was this blasphem'd love you gave to me. You reeled me in. You poisoned me. You, a demon monstrosity. A trap set so easily; a glare and skull-like grin. Do you realize the demon you are? Do you, demon, realize you're sin? And once, when most upon your love I do depend, you turn and take it all away; just a grave-robber in the end. The fire's out, the water's gone. The demon has set me free. But I still cling to the spider's web, though I'm drowning in the sea. The hooks of your love are in me, they tear my flesh away. And as I sink below the waves to the Devil I will pray. Apathy, Grief, Despair, consume my rotting flesh as I marvel at how short a time it took for you to leave me here in Living Death. "An Ode to the Brevity of a Demon's Kiss Called Love" Dalamar Mauvais

 

 

Long ago I walked with pride Among the men of Legend Gold and jewels, I had my share Yet all good things must end The gold has turned to copper My jewels are naught but stones And now my debt cuts like a knife Right down to the bone Candles burn to nothing As I sit here in my cell My mind is wavering fast now I know this must be hell I live in a world of make-believe Where life's a fantasy I can't tell if I'm awake or asleep Oh, God! What's reality!? Voices call me constantly Begging me to go With them to the Unholy Place The Black World far below Resistance grows much harder With every passing day I just want this life to be Something more than day to day I sit here in this cold rock cell Rotting, oh, so slow I can't tell what's real and what's a dream Yet that's all I want to know So I'll sit here longer Until the end of time Trapped inside this invisible box A prisoner in my own mind... "Untitled" Dalamar Mauvais

 

 

Trapped, silent; in the winter of my mind. Try to forget, try leaving it behind. I've apologized one thousand times to an empty... ...but I'm wishing it was you. Sitting, waiting, anxious, by the telephone. Knowing even if you called, there's still nobody home. I hug my knees and bite my lip and cling to Misery... ...but I'm wishing it was you. I'm wishing it was you Instead of Misery That was here right now To keep me company But I did the things I've done And a lot of them hurt you Now there's nothing left for me But to ache and wish for you And this pain that now consumes I'm wishing it was you... I'm wishing anything was you.... "Wishing" Dalamar Mauvais

 

 

Waves rumble against the cliffs The wind whips at my face The sky dark and ominous, pushing against the clouds. I stare out into the Void. My clothes ragged, my hair disheveled Eyes weathered as the storm. The leaves whisper unkept secrets in the trees And I stare out into the Void Searching for Calmness Constantly Searching. "Unsettled" Guenevere Gray

 

 

In these books blackened by fire I sift through your passion and desire But in these words inked by your hand All I read of is desert wastelands and sand You speak of pain and scaring Given to you from ones you called "Darling" What happened Dear Child Was the night never mild? No fond rememberances of any you held Was anguish, betrayal and remorse all you ever felt? Such sad tales from one I adore And all these loves lost shattered you to the floor. Fear not, I am with you now sweet one I cannot take back what has been done Nor can I piece you back together the way you were before This only do I hold in my power-to love you as no other Love you with no betrayal, no anguish, no remorse. Yours forever more. "Letters" Guenevere Gray

 

 

Shattered and broken on old dusty wood try to get up, get it back together But I know I'm not really in a fighting mood Terrified and alone, listening to the echoes of my nightmares Worse than nightmares is reality. In eternal sleep I'll find a haven Is there an exit? I can't find the door Please don't say there's only wall and the floor Is it just my imagination or are they slowly cavin'? Cavin' down on me A light in the shadows, barely at my fingertips But is there strength enough to grasp a new day It filters away through half closed eye lids And my last chance at salvation slips away Here in this room, it all becomes so clear The knowledge of my mistakes is my true hell Final Farewell, I've come to terms with what I've become and face my fear I dont believe I gave up, after all I did give my best Final Farewell, soon for the first time I'll know silence and rest. "Final Farewell" Guenevere Gray

 

 

Come sing to me, oh Ancient Sage! Whisper sweetly your enchanting secrets to my eager ear! The golden glowing goblet lulls me near I drink your Knowledge bitter It blinds my eyes and opens my mind And all to well I finally see Oh great Disdain! (was it you who brought me here?) I see. And to where does the world turn now? Only I know (a fiery doom for all who do not weep!) Heaven help my tortured soul I know. “Torment” Guenevere Gray

 

 

Quietly resting in someone's twined embrace Basking in the comforts the dark has come to endow Hidden away in the harbors of the shadows The warmth of another's touch Two hearts joined together by a singular love Pulsating in a slow rhythmic dance Safe, Secure, Silent Loved. "Heaven" Guenevere Gray

 

 

 

Music: Sunken Cathedral by Debussy

 

 


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