Making Kousagi Cry

Sailor Senshi Rebirth, Version 2...ish
By Aihara Yukii aka Sailor Ryo-Ohki aka Angel Serena aka Sailor Mercury90 aka Floranaturefairy aka Aisiko Awayuki aka...

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PLOT: Sailor Moon has lost all of her friends to Galaxia in the final battle. They must be reborn in some way, and there's only one way to do it: have Serena give birth to them all.
NEW CHARACTERS: Denise Jenn'e A'Marie Keisha Amour aka Sailor Sun
LENGTH: 43,723 words

COMMENTS: Do you all remember when I declared that The Misery Senshi Neo-Zero Double Blitzkrieg Debacle was the worst Sailor Moon fanfic of all time?

...Well, my opinion on that still stands. Its still the worst. I was so horrified by it, I pretty much threw up my hands and declared that my search for bad fanfiction was over - it couldn't possibly get worse than that. But I clearly jumped the gun on this declaration, as I didn't realize that Sailor Ryo-Ohki was still plugging along, and had even returned to the Sailor Moon fandom after a sojourn for parts unknown! And judging by this fanfic, she has not learned a damn thing in the several years in between. Nothing the apparent revision of this fanfic (this newest version of the fanfic, for some reason, has parts of the original version and its chapters mixed up in it, hence it being merely version 2...ish) shows anything other than what we already knew about Sailor Ryo-Ohki - and some things we didn't.

Seriously, this is a playbook on everything Sailor Ryo-Ohki. We get it, J'enne's fortieth name change is a strong and sassy sailor soldier who is just as powerful as Sailor Moon and she's black! We know, you like to use the dub names even though you've acknowledged that you are aware of the original Japanese names and the fact this takes place in Japan! And good god we know you like knocking Serena up with cute babies and playing house with them! And guess what, having her get pregnant once a year with her friends takes it to an entirely new level of creepy! I mean...what else can I honestly say about this that I haven't said about her other fanfics?

I'm not even going to get into the logic of why there's a Sailor Earth (even after you've revealed you watched Stars and thus should already know why that is not possible), turning the outers into sisters so that Michiru can hook up with a guy at the age of six, or the whole blending of PGSM into anime. Which, given which author we're talking about, unequivocally fails to be anything but an excuse to show how badass Sailor Ryo-Ohki's character inevitably is. You know what I'd really love to see, though, aside from variety and surprise, since I know I will likely not get it from this author. I'd actually like to see her finish a long story for once, so I can at least be annoyed at one of her stories in full.

Its been a good three years since I last reviewed a Sailor Ryo-Ohki story, and its nice to know that, coming back to this site to work on my archive, the only thing that's changed about Sailor Ryo-Ohki's fanfiction is the pen name she uses. And yet, at the same time, its all so very, very sad that she can't be bothered to change anything more than that, and thus likely prevent further stories of hers from coming on this website. But, que sera, sera - that's just the way it is.

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Sailor Moon and related characters are copyrighted 1991-2009 Naoko Takeuchi.