Making Kousagi Cry



Lita
By SailorWednesdayMercury


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PLOT: Mash-up with Disney's Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs. Princess Lita of Jupiter is targeted by Queen Nehellenia for her legendary beauty, and must hide in the woods with seven seamstresses. Will she be saved and live happily ever after with the dashing Lord Neflite?
NEW CHARACTERS: N/A
LENGTH: 3,455 words
RATING: G


COMMENTS: Beauty in the Beast. Fantasia. The Lion King. These three are my favorite Disney films. Even as my opinion of Disney has changed over the years to one of cynicism, these three and other films are still fun to watch. And whatever you might say about Disney films, none of them deserve what has happened in this fanfiction.

Here, the Disney version of Snow White is turned into a headache-inducing dub-based story about a Jupiterian named Lita living in a random castle, whose stepmother Nehellenia wants to eat her dreams so she can be the prettiest of them all. The seven dwarfs are now human 'seamstresses' (never mind the fact that three of them are men) and they harbor Lita as she rants about her stepmother trying to kill her. Also, the story is entirely in bold for no apparent reason. Oh, and we have 'Rainy Day Men' and 'My Only Love' as the songs - in fact, the longest chapters are the songifc ones.

Speaking of the amazingly short chapters (some are only four-five lines long!) the thing that really got to me besides the OOCness and the bolded type and the generaly banality of this mash-up was the ending. It...I...it ends so abruptly it's not even funny. It's like the author just gave up and decided to go "Bad guy wins BUT THEY ALL LIVE HAPPILY EVER AFTER!"

But it's ok because Haruka beats the crap out of the guy. Only not totally. If an author wants to make a good fanfic about psychological/traumatic issues, the best thing to do is to not turn it into a soap opera where the woe-is-me Sue is subjected to a very real, very painful experience that is horribly written out. Obviously pedophilia and child molestation can be replaced with any number of things that are considered the IT problem of the day - heck, just scroll through the site to see some examples of that - but unless you know what the heck you'e writing about, let's face it, it's going to suck. And unfortunately for Sailor Ryo-Ohki, that's exactly the same mistake she's kept on making.



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