For All Eternity
by Star Angel

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PLOT: A mysterious but popular new drink is turning people into angry maniacs. Its also turning them into stone. Can bitter enemies Serena and Darien put aside their differences and stop the person responsible? And what happens when they fall in love doing it?
NEW CHARACTERS: Mother Earth and her insane but hunky ecophiliac kid, Robbie Atkins
LENGTH: 14040 words

COMMENTS: Hmm, where do I start with this one? A cliched first-season set plot where bitter enemies instantaneously become the world's only hope of survival. Sounds pretty straightforward and not as brain-breaking, certainly in comparison to other fanfiction on this site. And yeah, its based on the dub with uber-bitch Raye, but again, plenty of borderline fanfiction is based on the dub with a butchered Sailor Mars. And even the random author's notes splattered around make it an eyesore, but other fanfics do it too.

So, aside from all the cliches we've come to expect from first-season fanfiction what exactly is the problem with this fanfiction that makes it so.....bad?

Let me direct your attention to the character named Robbie Atkins. Beautiful, cute ("for an American"), and insane. The guy who makes Koo-Koo Cola. The one who wants to kill humanity because we killed his best friend, Earth. Yeah, him. He makes this fic stand out; him, and his plot to turn everyone to stone. I don't know, but would it be too much to maybe not make the character so blatantly evil or have the plot so blatantly obvious after three paragraphs? Can we also not have the message of "SAVE THE EARTH, LOVE THE EARTH" not be pounded into our skulls until they are bloody masses of nothing? And why the hell would Mother Earth (who, of course, usurps Mamoru as the protector of Earth and is give a description worthy of a Sue) name her kid Robbie Atkins? Ponder these questions well, for they won't be answered.

Oh, and as an added bonus, the author's notes at the end are....well, they're quite interesting. Because I didn't know Naoko Takeuchi was prone to try and murder people with brown bananas.

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