Disclaimer. I no own, you no sue? Deal! Ramblings: Dedicated to: Mistress Hakkyou - Thank you for the violent idea! (muahahahaha!) :: Ch-8: Oh snap:: "C'mon Minako!" Ami shouted as she kicked down the doors where her beloved was (hopefully) being contained. "Let's get Mako-chan!" Minako jumped up and began to fire her gun widly. "TAKE THAT YOU SONS-A-BITCHES!!!" she cackled. The machine gun spat out streams of bullets as Minako swung the hunk of metal around. "AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAA!!!" Click! Minako frowned and pulled the trigger of the smoking gun. "What the hell?!" she snarled. She shook the gun and slapped the barrel a few times. "Piece of crap!" she growled, tossing the empty gun to the ground. Ami, who had hidden behind a nearby crate, peeked over the edge and gasped in horror. "Oh my God!" Ami cried. "Minako look what you've done!" "What?" Minako turned and stared at the horrific scene in front of her. "Ohhhhhh..." The bodies of patrons of the five-hundred and ninety eigth Star Trek ComicCon lay sprawled about the warehouse, their bodies filled with lead and their last thoughts filled with ecchi images of a blonde phsycopath, black leather, whipped cream, and fuzzy handcuffs. "I'm gonna go to hell for this aren't I?" Minako griped dryly. Ami shrugged. "Well," Minako sighed as she shouldered her bazooca. "let's go find that dog-eared Sets-chan now." CRASH!!! "YIPES!" Minako screeched as she dropped the bazooca and leapt into Ami's arms like Scooby-Dooby-Doo. The S.W.A.T. team busted through the roof of the warehouse and aimde their handguns at the startled Minako and Ami. "FREEZE! You are under-aresst for mass murder, arsony, polygamy--" "Whoa, whoa whoa whoa!" Minako wailed as she waved her arms wildly in the air. "Polygamy?! I'm not even MARRIED!!!!" "True," one of the officers agreed. "but you are the one of the biggest pimps in fanfiction." "I am?" "Yep. And in America, that's polygamy enough for us!" Ami sighed as she dropped her blonde compadre to the ground. "Only in America." she grumbled. "And you!" the squad leader growled. "You're under-aresst for, well...FOR BEING SMARTER THAN ME!" "That's not a very good reason." said another officer. A murmur of agreement ran through the squad. "So what!?" the leader shouted, his face a beet red. "It's not my fault that she's a NERD!!!!" A startled gasp ran through the warehouse. "Uh-oh," Minako murmured as she began to back away from her blue-haired friend. "You just signed your death certificate buddy." "I did?" "Yep. And in Japan, when you call a smart person a nerd, you are so dead." "Really?" "Really really." "Yeah," Ami growled evily as she crept up behind the squad leader. "And us girls know how to TEAR OUT VOCAL CORDS!!!" With that, Ami grabbed the squad leader by his throat and threw him to the ground. She lept on top of him, grabbed his jungular, and ripped out his vocal cords in a gout of gorey, bloody, violent gooiness. It was like something out of Saw... "Oh god..." Minako moaned as she grabbed her stomach. "that is so SICK!!!" But what was even sicker was the fact that the other men were watching with a look of complete and utter awe on their faces. Minako gagged and clammped a hand over her mouth as her eyes crossed comically and her face turned green. She ran behind a crate and retched up the remains of her lunch. ...Ew. Meanwhile... "I wonder how Ami and Minako are doing?" Rei pondered out loud as she K.O.ed poor Usagi on Dragon Ball Z Tenkaiichi. "NO!" Usagi cried. "Trunks!!!!" She blinked. "What was that about Minako and Ami?" "Well," Rei began as she brushed off the cookie crumbs from her shirt. "we've left Ami alone with Minako. " Rei sighed. "Poor thing might've gotten her vocal cords ripped out by now." "Oh c'mon Rei-chan!" Usagi laughed. "So we left Ami and Minako alone with over five-hundred tons of weaponry and a tank! What's the worst that could happen!" A pause. "Oh shit." Meanwhile meanwhile... Setsuna laughed maniacally to herself as she crept through Timmy Turner's window. "Don't worry Phillip," she whispered to herself. "I'm coming!!" She slithered and slunked, with a smile most unpleasent. Then suddenly... Jazzy, sneaky music came on as a deep male voice began to sing... You're a mean one, Mr. Grinch! "Wait-a-minute!" Setsuna cried. "What the hell?! This isn't a songfic!" Oh... A pause... It isn't? "NO!" Oh... A pause... You sure? "AGGGGGGHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!" Back to Mina-chan and Ami-chan... "But I wanna got to Disney Land!!!" Squad solider # 1 whined. "No way!" Solider # 2 scoffed. "Six Flags is better!" "Idiots!" Solider #3 growled. "Jazzland baby!" "No way!" "Disney Land!" "Jazzland!" "Six Flags!" "DISNEY LAND!!!" "JAZZLAND!" "SIX FLAGS!!" "THAT'S IT!!" Ami shouted as she hit the breaks of the tank. After the blunette had killed the squad leader, his lackies had decided to join them in their quest to save fair Makoto from the evils of a fruity purple dinosaur. (How they figured out that Barney had kidnapped Makoto, I don't think we want to know...) And, the nearest vehicle was the tank that Usagi and Rei had parked outside. (How Rei managed to get a tank, I don't think we want to know...) "You three will shut up or, so help me, I will turn this tank around!" Ami snarled. At the disbelieving looks the squad gave her, she then threatened with, "And no MacDonalds!!" "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!" "NOT THAT!!" "I'M NOT LOVIN' THIS!!" "It's okay!" Minako soothed. "We'll get some MacDonalds." "YAY!" Ami glared at the blonde. "B-but!" Minako stuttered. "You can't get a BigMac!" "WAHHHH!" "Okay, you can get the BigMac." "YAY!" Glare. "B-but, you can't have the large!" "WAHHHH!" "Okay, you can get the large!" "YAY!" Glare. "B-but no apple pie!" "WAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" "You suck!" Meanwhile meanwhile meanwhile... Rei and Usagi finished their bag of cookies and ran to the convientently concealed bookcase. "Quick Usa!" Rei boomed over-dramatically. "To the Moonie Cave!" "We have a Moonie Cave?" "Yep." The raven-haired miko turned to the camera and gave a sugary sweet smile. "Thanks to the generous donations to local PBS staions, from viewers like you! Thank you" "...What?" "I dunno. I felt like saying that." "Oh." Rei grabbed a red book and watched as the bookcase swirled to show two levers, side by side. "Pull the lever Usako!" Rei declared. Usagi muttered something about "stupid seme-girlfriends" and pulled the... "WRONG LEVERRRRRRRRRR!!!" Rei screamed as she fell into the trap door that led to the alagator pool. SPLASH!!! Usagi looked down and muttered, "Oops." ::::::::::::::::: TO BE CONTINUED::::::::::::::::::::::::