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MANGA
Friday, 29 September 2006

 

 


Gaignun: I’m never waking in the morning with my brother ever again. He wakes up at the crack of dawn!

KOS-MOS: Do tell this information to me. Database must be updated.

Gaignun: …Well.. I made a list because I stayed over one time and I wrote down all the procedures.

KOS-MOS: Gimmie gimmie, I predict this will be good for potential black mail.

Gaignun: No! Come on, give it back…be good.

KOS-MOS: Never! It’s mine now. Mine mine. My death grip rocks. You cannot avail!

Gaignun: This could mean my very life is at stake. Give it here. Please!

KOS-MOS: I sense a whine in your voice this is…fun.

Jr.: Hi Gaignun

KOS-MOS: JR.!!! LOOKIE!!!

Gaignun: No! Give it here. Please please!

Jr.: What are you two babbling?

KOS-MOS: Look at this paper! Look look, I’ll shove it in your face, see?

Gaignun: Aha! Got it.

KOS-MOS: ...Bastard. *walks away*
--------------------

Jr.: So Gaignun have you done that one thing for me?

Gaignun: Why are we talking on the phone? Why can’t we tele-

Jr.: AUGH I HATE GHETTO PEOPLE!!!

Gaignun: That isn’t ghetto.

Jr.: No! Some ghetto moron is driving by blaring their bullshit music. With the bass up as loud as it can go. My eardrums are about to pop and my office windows are rattling.

Gaignun: Oh my…

Jr.: I hate ghetto people so much. I DESPISE ghetto people. They need to be exterminated.

Gaignun: My goodness, that’s not very nice.

Jr.: Who said I was nice??

Gaignun: Um I'm gonna get a salad. I'm hungry, but I need something semi-healthy.

Jr.: Why tell me this?

Gaignun: Oops, I let that outloud?

Jr.: Huh?

Gaignun: Did I?

Jr.: I’m puzzled.

Gaignun: As am I.

Jr.: This is why I hate telepathy.
------------------------------------

KOS-MOS: *is writing an email* OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG GAIGNUN KUKAI JR. GET A BLOG NOW. You’re the best! lol Bye!

Shion: *walks in* What are you doing with my stuff KOS-MOS?

KOS-MOS: On my blog. Beh.

Shion: Are you mailing Jr.? I told you to stop bugging him…

KOS-MOS: YES, I STALKED HIS CORP. EMAIL TO GET IT, SHUT UP!

KOS-MOS: AAAAAH I LOVE CAPS BUT OMG ARE YOU ONLINE YOU HAD BETTER REPLY ME OR I'LL HUNT YOU DOWN!!!!!!!!!!! Hugs and kisses!

Shion: KOS-MOS are you still on there?
KOS-MOS: SHHH I’m typing. “ANSWER ME NOW!!!! PLEASE! YOU ARE SO CUTE. LOL I CAN’T BELIEVE I SAID THAT. I WANT TO TAKE YOU ON A DATE WITH ME. LOL BUT I CAN’T. THAT SUCKS. I’M SO NERVOUS. SEE YOU!”
KOS-MOS: YOU’RE SO CUTE I WANNA HAVE YOUR BABIES OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG!!!

Shion: KOS-MOS get off there right now, that’s the 10th email you sent in 5 minutes!!

KOS-MOS: ….Crap. Uh oh.

Shion: What is it now?

KOS-MOS: This is your console, correct…?

Shion:….OH MY GOD!! DELETE THEM DELETE THEM! NOO!!!


KOS-MOS: I can’t delete them. Loser.

Shion: I just developed asthma.

KOS-MOS: Sucks to be you.

Shion: *calling Gaignun* Hello!?

Gaignun: ..Hello?

Shion: Question. You answer it, now!

Gaignun: Emergency?

Shion: Does Jr. check his mail a lot????

Gaignun: Well he does at the end of the day.

Shion: Thanks bye!

Gaignun: wha-

Shion: It’s time for some heavy duty spy action. I gotta delete those.

KOS-MOS: I’ll do it. *snicker*

Shion: Yeah right.

KOS-MOS: No fun.

Shion: Is he in there right now?

KOS-MOS: I’m not tellin’ you.

Shion: *walks in Jr.’s room* Oh um hi.

Jr.: Hi?

Shion: I mean, AHHHHH!!! AHHHH!!

Jr.: …O…kay.

Shion: There’s a gnosis about to eat Gaignun!!!
SAVE HIM!

Jr.: No there isn’t. Why would they waste time on Gaignun?

Shion: MOMO is trapped under a car! I can’t lift it, I need manpower

Jr.: She’s with her mom and Ziggy. Why ask me of all people to lift a car!?

Shion: My uncle is in a coma go see him in the hospital!

Jr.: I care, why?

KOS-MOS: Hi. Check your email, there’s a message from Albedo saying he’ll bug you again. Bye.

Jr.: Ergh, that bastard…

Shion: NO don’t look! Don’t! Albedo sent a picture of himself naked on that email!

KOS-MOS: Kevin also naked, has a sign in the picture that says “Gaignun Jr., you can go suck it!”

Jr.: *ignores KOS-MOS* Okay Shion, what do you want, seriously.

KOS-MOS: Not fair.

Shion: N..nothing.

Jr.: You don’t normally act like this. And you don’t ask for a man’s help if something is going on.

Shion: I don’t want you looking at that, Albedo..is..is naked. What more to say? That’s all.

Jr.: Shion…

Albedo: *steps by* Great I walked right into a romance film! Just great.

Jr.: Get out!

Albedo: I think I need to puke. Toodles.

Shion: Okay I’ll tell you…the truth is…something I didn’t say at all got to-

Gaignun: Come here right now!!!

Jr.: What is it now Gaignun? Tell me when I come back, kay Shion?

Shion: *eyes around and dashes to his desk* Where are those suckers…Oh come on, come on…password? Password! PASSWORD!! Let’s see I’ll just type in a bunch of numbers..

Jr.: Shion?

Shion: What!? Oh crap.

Jr.: What are you doing..?

Shion: I…was..uh..umm..do you want me?

Jr.: What!

Shion: Oh I was just waiting for you and getting myself comfortable.

Jr.: Well I don’t mind.

KOS-MOS: loop loop…. coming through. Not lookin’ at that... detour…detour…

Shion: Want kiss me?

Jr: er..yeah?

Shion: Really want to?

Jr.: Yes.

Shion: What’s your password?

Jr.: Anything you want it to be…

Shion: No..what’s your password? For this?

Jr.: ….

Shion: I knew this wouldn’t work!!

Jr.: Of course it’ll work..

Shion: You pervert no! I need your password so I can delete emails KOS-MOS sent to you under my name!!

Jr.: Yeah shhh

Shion: LISTEN TO ME NOW!!

Jr.: Did you have to scream? Leave that for later.

Shion: I need your password now, just give it to me.

Jr.: I’ll give it to you.

Shion: Ah! No. No. You can’t touch there. You can’t! I knew this was a bad idea.

Jr.: You’re the bad one though.

Shion: Get out of pervert mode now!!

Jr.: Fine. What is it?

Shion: Wow that was fast.

Jr.: So I’ll just delete those. Besides the way KOS-MOS types, I would know it was her. Don’t worry about it. You really didn’t need to go through all the trouble.

Shion: Okay…Alright..that works… Am I crazy?

Jr.: Just a tad…

Shion: I needed to be assured that’s all. I..I..I’m going now so um we did nothing, nothing at all.

Jr.: That’s right.

Shion: I just did it to get that, that’s all. I’m not really like that.

Jr.: I’ll remember to call you when I need something.

Shion: Hey!!

Jr.: I was kidding…

Shion: I hope it doesn’t damage our friendship with what I have done and I am terribly sorry.

Jr.: Don’t need to act like we’re a pair or something.

Shion: I’m overacting that means it’s time for me to leave!

KOS-MOS: I recorded all of this…this is perfect. Ohhh Albedooo I got a surprise for you….
------------------------

Canaan: I just took a shower, and since no one else was around, I sang in my most horrible voice. It's fun to purposefully sing bad.
--------------------------------

Matthews: If I don’t like you, I’ll say I hope you fall onto a car naked!


Edit this Post | Delete this Post
 
 
 
16 February 2007 00:01 EST | Posted by games6/shiseiten

MOMO: what are you all doing with pickles?

Mary:…contest.

Pellegri: Damn, 4 inches. *takes pickle out of mouth*

Shion: I got it to 6.

Pellegri: Lucky.

Gaignun: Hi ladies so what are you…ack. *covers eyes*

MOMO: I don’t get it.

Jr.: Hey Gaignun can you fax this to-…. Why hello there girls.

MOMO: I think they are trying to kill themselves with that vegetable!

Jr.: Oh ho, I think not. I remember this stuff from back when,

Gaignun: PLEASE DON’T SAY IT.

Jr.: Heh heh

Mary: I got it to 7! Whoo. Beat my score.

Jr.: Damn…. *pulls a chair over to watch*

MOMO: I don’t get it! It’s boring.

Gaignun: Oh I should be going now….

Mai: I wanna try it! The wonderful Miss Magus can do anything.

Jr.:…You look 15. No.

Mai: Oh yeah?? Well, you look 14 or something! Ooooooooh!!

Jr.: *chant to self* don’t get mad, don’t get mad, don’t get mad…

Mai: Hahahaha, 8 inches. I win. Leupold would be proud.

Jr.: Wow… so hey, babe, I don’t think we’ve been properly introduced…

Mai: Sorry I look 15 remember? *skips away*

Jr.: I’m so stupid!

Pellegri: Crap I only got it 3 this time.

Jr.: I was expecting better from someone as sexy as you.

Pellegri: *shoves the whole thing and coughs*

MOMO: Vegetable suicide isn’t “sexy”

Gaignun: WHY AM I STILL HERE?

Jr.: Because you are a man.

Gaignun: No no no no it isn’t like that! I’m starting to sweat.

Shion: It’s too big. I can’t do it anymore.

Jr.: Then you really wouldn’t wanna try to have m-

Gaignun: OH MY DEAR LORD!!!!!!!!!!!!!! LIES.

Jr.: Gaignun chill, its good fun.

Gaignun: *shakes*

Pellegri: I got it to 5!!

MOMO: can I try?

Pellegri: ….. *snort* No. *tries again*

Jr.: You girls are making me think some not so fluffy and floozy thoughts.

Shion: What’s mean??

Jr.: Oh you know…

Mary: I can only get it close to 7 or 6 and a half!!

Jr.: Around or close to my range...

MOMO: You have a pickle too?

Jr.: *tries not to laugh*

MOMO: Where is your pickle, I don’t see it? *looks around*

Jr.: Ahah..haha.. It’s hidden. I only play this game at night.

MOMO: Aw rats, I wanted to see you do it.

Durandal worker: Hey chibi-sama. *touches his chest*

Jr.: not now, I’m busy. Later.

Durandal worker: *puts something in his back pocket*

MOMO: ….. what,

Gaignun: Come on MOMO want to go play at the park? It’ll be fun *tries to drag*

Shion: I got it to 6!

Jr.: Not quite up to par..eh.

Shion: Who says it’s about you!

Jr.: I’m just musing to myself, woman.

Pellegri: No fighting!! *chokes*

Gaignun: What did you need faxed? Tell me now, please? Pleeease…I wanna go *picks up MOMO*

Jr.: What? I don’t know.

Gaignun: Oh my…oh my goodness *looks to ground*

KOS-MOS: *rushes in, spots Jr.* I MUST PLAY THIS SEDUCTIVE GAME OF BEWILDERMENT.

Jr.: *squeak*…Gaignun..help me..

Gaignun: hmph no. *saunters off*

Jr.: *panic attack*

KOS-MOS: Yippie. Mine. *quickly grabs pickle from Shion*

Shion: *shock* KOS-MOS?

KOS-MOS: Now you see it? Now you don’t *shoves whole thing in mouth* *coughs it out* WHOO!!!

Pellegri: ow. It hit me!

Jr.: *looks for an exit*

KOS-MOS: So whoever wins gets to have fun with Gaignun Kukai Jr., real name, Rubedo, occupation, joined CEO with brother, Gaignun Kukai Sr., real name, Negredo. Who is with me??

Jr.: *tries to scramble*

KOS-MOS: I’m the winner. Cha cha cha. I am the winner, yes yes yes.

Shion: Awww come on Jr., give her her prize.

Jr.: She’s an android!!

Pellegri: You deserve this. *runs out with other girls, locking him in*

KOS-MOS: Ha. See you.

Jr.: Okay KOS-MOS sorry but I don’t like fake-
KOS-MOS: …did you just call me fake?! I am not superficial I am not shallow.

Jr.: What, I didn’t mean that kind of-

KOS-MOS: No. Shutup. You did. You did. *spanks him*

Jr.: …ow….now that’s some strength I’m definitely not use to.

Jr.: Can you just go. I have no interest and-

KOS-MOS: *rips open her shirt*

Jr.: whoa, hello, um I think you need to leave, now…

KOS-MOS: I am hurt! I am going to strip naked until you see the beauty in me.

Jr.: *pops some pills* hopefully I’ll make it out alive…

Mary: Was it a good idea to leave him alone with her?

Shion: No. But he deserves it for butting in.

Gaignun: I never want to see any of you play with those cucumbers again.

MOMO: Pickles.

Gaignun: Yeah those.

Edit this Post | Delete this Post
 
 
 
16 February 2007 00:01 EST | Posted by games6/shiseiten

KOS-MOS: I'm sleepy
chaos: Me too. I slept enough... but I've been tired lately.
KOS-MOS: why?
chaos: huh.
KOS-MOS: question, I asked.
--------------------

Albedo: OH MY GOD I just realized something

Jr.: What???

Albedo: Okay, look at a map of Sweden. Then cover up the top half. It looks... kinda dirty.

Jr.: …

Albedo: And with Norway there, too...

Jr.: …

Albedo: Looks like the countries are having a little fettuccini alfredo goin' on!
-----------

Margulis: I have found you, Jin Uzuki!

Jin: Margulis! Where did you come from?

Margulis: The Italian restaurant down the street.

Jin: O---kay…

Margulis: Hey, Uzuki. You want a breadstick?

Jin: What?

chaos: I think that's sexual harassment.

Canaan: ...

chaos: At least he didn't offer you an Italian sausage.

Jin: Thank you for breaking my brain.

Canaan: ...urge to kill rising.
------------

Albedo: So! How was YOUR day, Red?

Kevin: ... *just came out of Wilhelm's office and is rather bruised all over*

Albedo: Sucks to be you! Haha, get it? Sucks!

Kevin: Shut up, Albedo. He just beat me up is all. Your jokes are so tiring.

Albedo: *doesn't seem to hear him* It must be crazy getting boshed by Wilhelm! *laughs*

Kevin: Crazy like you? And… at least I never got it by my father.

Albedo: ...............that... was a low blow. Didn't your mother teach you any manners?

Kevin: Albedo… *warning glare*

Albedo: OH! Wait a minute! You don't HAVE a mother! She's dead! I guess that means you need to shut the hell up! That's what I'd do if my mother was dead: shut the hell up! Shut. The. hell. Up! That's right, Kevy! You think I'm gonna take orders from the Red Testament? You may be Wilhelm's slap toy but you're gonna---GAAAAHH!!!

Kevin: *ATTACK*

Virgil: Holy crap! CAT FIGHT!

Voyager: *grabs some popcorn*
Virgil: Hey, share! *steals some*

Voyager: *wonders if there will be action following the fight*

Virgil: ...don't ever think about that again.

Voyager: Sorries.

Albedo: *beats Kevin*

Kevin: gah.

Virgil: A winner is you!

Albedo: Hell yeah. FEELS GOOD TO BE A WINNER, AIRHEAD! Hahaha Airhead.

Kevin: Does it feel that good, Albedo? You… you… *cries*

Wilhelm: *appears* That's enough, both of you. Kevin, come with me.

Kevin: But we just...

Wilhelm: ...are you questioning me?

Kevin: No, sir! *follows Wilhelm*

Albedo: Yes indeedy. A winner is me.

Voyager: Hey, I was right! Right?

Virgil: …NO.
---------------

Virgil: "I'm blue, da-ba-dee da-ba-dai!"

Albedo: *blink*

Virgil: That's my song, duh. 90’s American pop culture.

Albedo: Mine is better.

Virgil: Bullcrap.

Albedo: "I'M PRETTY FLY FOR A WHITE GUY!" Get it? Because of my white outfit…

Virgil: …

Voyager: "Back in black, I hit the sack!"

Virgil: …please never talk about the sack again.

Voyager: Sorries.

Kevin: …

Virgil: Say something, god damn!

Kevin: …something.

Albedo: EARTH TO DIPSHIT! You forgot to declare your song, dumbass! HAHAHAH

Kevin: *sighs* "…if you want to be free, take a sip of this tea, join the Red Oyster Cult."

Virgil: You know, Red, you can really be a total ditz sometimes…

Kevin: Shut your mouth before I--- *whine*

Wilhelm: That's enough, Winnicot.

Kevin: I apologize.

Wilhelm: You can make it up to me later with your pleas of help from my torturing.

Virgil: He's got you WHIPPED, Kevy! Oops, I mean Red.

Albedo: OOH! Somebody just got owned, and I think it was Kevin Kevin!

Kevin: …I really hate you all. *stalks off to sulk*

Voyager: "Back in black, I hit the---"

Virgil: ---NO.
-------------

Albedo: Hey, guys! Fortune cookies!

Virgil: Sweet-ass. *opens one* "Beware your brothers in arms; sibling rivalry may abound."

Albedo: In bed!

Virgil: *cringes* I'm not even going to ponder that one.

Voyager: My turn. *opens cookie* "Beware of the past, for it may come back to haunt you."

Albedo: In bed!

Voyager: *smirks*

Virgil: ...please don't ever smirk like that again.

Voyager: Sorries.

Albedo: *opens his* "Growth of the spirit is stronger than growth of the body."

Virgil: In bed!

Albedo: *cough* BULLSHIT. I think someone mixed up my fortune with Rubedo's. HAHAHA!!! *averts eye seeing if Jr. is around*

Virgil: Easy thing to do.

Albedo: I'm offended! HAHAHA

Kevin: *opens a cookie and silently reads the fortune* ...

Albedo: Read it out loud!

Kevin: ...I'd rather not.

Virgil: Read it, Kevy, or we'll do it for you.

Kevin: ...fine. It says, "You will always be forced to submit to a higher power."

Albedo & Virgil: IN BED!

Voyager: *cackles*

Albedo: That's old news right there.

Virgil: No kidding. Happens all the time.

Kevin: ...

Albedo: No thanks, Red. Wilhelm will beat my ass if I take you up on that.

Virgil: I don't swing that way, anyhow.

Voyager: *snickers*

Kevin: I hate you all!

Wilhelm: *walks in* What's going on?

Albedo: Fortune cookies, boss! *tosses him one*

Wilhelm: Oh? *opens it* "Your adversary has more bountiful assets."

Albedo: *snorts with laughter and whispers* In bed...!

Wilhelm: ...pardon me? *narrows eyes*

Albedo: I said nothing! *tries to keep a straight face*

Wilhelm: My manhood feels threatened. *sulks* Kevin Winnicot, come with me. I need to... speak to you.

Kevin: Yes, sir. *follows Wilhelm*

Albedo: Here we go again! I wonder what they do…

Virgil: This is getting old!
----------

Shion: *goes to work, looking really tired*

Miyuki: Shion! ... Um…what's wrong?

Shion: I... didn't sleep last night.

Togashi: Why?

Shion: Kevin was... um, visiting me... that's why.

Togashi: Oho! Was he, now? Didja do it?

Shion: None of your business!

Miyuki: *drags Shion off to a corner* You can tell me!

Shion: Well... yes. *dreamy smile*

Miyuki: Oh my God, no way! *giggles* So ...how was he?

Shion: What do you think? He kept me up all night. He's amazing.

Miyuki: *loudly* What? How can he be when he's an idiot?

Shion: Miyuki, shut up!

Allen: What's going on?

Togashi: Kevin scored with Shion last night.

Allen: ...what?

Togashi: Bed-action, duh!

Shion: You're asking for it, all of you!

Allen: T'm not ever gonna get any...

Kevin: *walks in* Morning, everyone!

Vector People: *all whoop and cheer*

Kevin: ...

Togashi: Kevin, you dog! *makes some questionable gestures*

Kevin: What did I do?

Togashi: Her! *points to Shion*

Shion: *points to Miyuki* THIS IS ALL HER FAULT! *runs off to the bathroom to hide*

Miyuki: She always blames me...

Kevin: It's gonna be a looooong day.

Wilhelm: *over the intercom* Damn straight.

Vector People: THE BOSS.

Wilhelm: Kids, don't fornicate. It spoils your complexion. Unless you're me, of course. *strikes a pose*

Togashi: Well I guess Allen's never going to have another pimple!

Allen: *runs off to the bathroom to cry*
-----------

Tony: So anyway, I'm pretty much ill. I got some sleep this morning, and when I got up, so did my breakfast. Meaning I ATE A HUGE BOWL OF VOMIT-O'S.

Jr.: Huh. I see….

Tony: Yeah…
---------

Wilhelm: Can I grope you?

chaos: No.

Kevin: Can I grope you?

chaos: No.

Wilhelm: Can Kevin grope you?

chaos: NO.

Virgil: Can I grope you?

chaos: NO!

Voyager: Can I grope you?

chaos: .........

Albedo: Can I—

chaos: NO, SHUT UP!
-------------

Albedo: I'm gonna jam the Durandal.

MOMO: How do you do that?

Albedo: Watch and learn, ma peche. *launches a gigantic jar of raspberry jam at the Durandal*
Jam: *smashes into the Durandal*

Jr.: Dammit! We've been jammed! *tastes the jam* There's only one person who would give me the raspberry! ALBEDOOOO!!!

Albedo: *laughs* Since I can’t blow you one. Hhahaha

Jin: *watches from E.S. Reuben* OOH! A big sticky phallus!

Canaan: ...

chaos: Let's not talk about that.
----------------------

MOMO: Checkmate!

Jr.: Shit! I really screwed myself over on that one!*tosses cards*

Albedo: You could of won if you'd listened to me, Rubedo.

MOMO: "Have," Albedo. He could have won.

Albedo: ...

Jr.: *grin*

Albedo: Ma peche?

MOMO: Yes?

Albedo: Bite me.

MOMO: I think I'll pass you up on that offer.

Albedo: You don't know what you're missing.

Jr.: HEY! WHOA, WHOA, HOLD IT!

Albedo: *laughs* I’m a pervert.
------------

Wilhelm: Lalalala someone smack me.

Jr.: WITH PLEASURE. *smacks*

Everyone Else: AHAHAHAHAHAHA

Kevin: *sulks*

Kevin: Albedo, you do realize that you're WHITE.

Albedo: Uh yeah. What?

Kevin: You're also incredibly stupid.

Albedo: Oh yeah? Well, yo' mama's so fat, when she got turned into a Gnosis, the Hilbert Effect couldn't even hit her other side!

Kevin: I'm going to go do drugs and cut myself.
--------------

Jr.: I’m in a giving mood ask me anything…

*reporters flock*

Jr.: Er..

KOS-MOS: *runs through* Three questions: please answer all three? Plllleeeaaassee?? What.... is your name? WHAT.... do you think of me? WHAT.... IS THE COLOR OF NIGHT?

Jr.: …. One, Rubedo. I was named after Jung theories. Two,I really don't know what to think. You are a battle android that shouldn’t have these emotions towards me. And you shouldn't be wearing such racy..sexy, er, clothing.
Three, whatever it is, it's probably the same color as my DARK SOOOOOOOOUUUUUUUL!!! There.

KOS-MOS: *blink*
------------------

Shion: Tralalalala cupcakes.

Jr.: You guys like my new outfit? It’s for Xenosaga III.

Shion: I don’t have one yet!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Jr.: …Sexist Japan.

Shion: I KNOW.

Chaos: Where’s your long coat thingy?

Jr.: *shrug*

MOMO: It’s neat…

Ziggy: It smells like cows, I mean leather.

Jin: Hmm… easy to look at now.. *checks out*

Jr.: …

Canaan: I wish I had one just like that.

KOS-MOS: I like it. It is fastidious.

Chaos: Why do you get one first, I can’t wait for mine.

--------------

Jr: *bangs on door* Dammit Canaan! Get out of there already!!! I have to go to the bathroom REALLY badly!

Canaan: I’ll only be in here for three more minutes.
------------------------

Telos: Silence you Mechanical Doll!!!

KOS-MOS: IM NOT A DOLL!!!

Telos: ?

KOS-MOS: I’m an action figure....
----------------------------------

Albedo: Why am I even here?

MOMO: Once you get past denial, you'll be on the road to recovery.

Albedo: What's there to recover? I'm perfectly fine!

Kevin: I know it hard, but you have to say it.

Albedo: NO! I'm not like you all!

Jr: Come on... it's just one small sentence.

Albedo: But....

Gaignun: Go on.

Albedo: ...my name is Albedo Yuriev, and I'm a... recovering pedophile. *Breaks down in tears*

Everyone: *Goes to give him a group hug*
-------------------------

Shion: Jr. I REALLY need to use the restroom. Can you please tell me where it is?

Jr: Sure thing. *points* Okay, you go down the hallway, take a left, then a right, you'll see a hole in the wall. Go around the window into the next floor, there will be a mine-cart. Get in the mine-cart and ride it all the way down the tracks but make sure you jump out before it reaches a cliff. Grab the vine, swing down to the lake. You'll see alligators in the lake, so go back up the vine and head towards the accessory shop. Give the clerk the secret password "TELLMYASS" and he will give you a slab of meat. Go back down the vine to the alligators and throw the meat as far to the right as you can. After you've thrown the meat, swim across to the other side. You'll be in a building once again. Go up the broken stairs and into the room in front of you. The room will explode, sorry we'll fix it later, so go back out and back across the lake, up the vine, up the mine-cart track and back to me. When you come back to me, look to the right and there’s the bathroom.
-------------------------

Yuriev: Ha! I now have the looks of a young male, with the stamina to match!

Albedo: I dunno, I kinda liked you better with black hair.

Yuriev: SILENCE!

-----------------------
Durandal female worker: If that space-time anomaly keeps expanding, it'll engulf this whole region of space. There won't be anywhere left to run... OH NO! *whines*

Jr.: Yeah, that's too bad......*lean* say, you don't wanna die a virgin, do you?

-------------------

chaos: Hi I am chaos.

Albedo: neigh neigh.


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14 January 2007 00:01 EST | Posted by games6/shiseiten

Design Materials old-version


1. Heinlein is head of the religious Ormus association, looking for Lost Jerusalem and the body of Jesus Christ.

2. Faberonia is a Realien. The mother of Cecile and Cathe, she was used as a test case during U-TIC's Zohar Control Project. Sent early in the project to the plant Milchia and subjected to numerous experiments, she met a battle-wounded Virgil one day and slowly fell in love for a short time after repeated meetings with the human. Slaughtered by a fellow Realian when the Milchian war intensified.

3. The original KOSMOS prototype was the same as Chaos a long long time ago, existing as wave beings (maybe similar to the wave existence?). It was later stolen by Wilhelm for his own personal plans. Chaos is hoping to turn KOSMOS back into her original form

4. Jr., the major male character, appears to be youthful, but has actually just passed his late 20's birthday. Same age as Albedo, his twin brother.
He is portrayed in the story as an impulsive, reckless, and passionate. A lover of women by nature, though his personality is flawed is the way he uses his innocent looks to make girls fawn over him, his drinking habits and other habits such as gambling could be one also. On the other hand, his attitude towards other men is caustic and he has no trouble bluntly saying whatever he wants to them. Despite that, he has wide knowledge about the world, and he occasionally acts more his age even and makes bold statements that cut right into the heart of matters. Enjoys collecting old books and guns.

5. U-Do is a conscious existence, evolved from an artificial brain life form created as a navigational device for the U.M.N. Its internal systems were the basis for the Realian project. Claimed by U-TIC during the Milchia Conflict for use as a control device for Zohar, a mutation machine, but went berserk, releasing the Gnosis in the process.
The cause behind what U-Do did was officially described by higher-ups in the Stellar Federation as a program gone out of control, but the real reason was a new existence borne into this universe by the opening of a path to a higher dimension. U-Do is looking for the half of its body that was taken from it by this existence. Having existed for so long as a single brain, separated from the outside, it is not clearly aware of itself or the rest of the world.

6. Virgil is the lieutenant of the Marines division. The war twelve years ago that came to be known at the Milchian Conflict took the life of Faberonia, his dearly beloved, and since then he has held a deep-seated hatred for Realians. He is killed in the first episode by KOS-MOS, but appears on occasion in spirit form later as part of Wilhelm's Vanguard Force. A man with a treacherous face, DME poisoning (an illness caused by injecting Realian body tissue into the bloodstream) has given him cracked, scarred skin all over his body (note: DME is also mentioned in the UMN Database).

7. Joachim Mizrahi is a genius of rare caliber. Constructor of Hilbert theory and developer of D.S.S.S. Joined Project Zohar after his research caught the eye of Wilhelm. Soon realizing the danger behind the project, he quit the research group after the death of his daughter, Sakura. Retired from public life and secluded in his Mizrahi Brain Physics Laboratory, his own lab on the planet Miluchia. After receiving contacts from the secret society Ormus, founded the U-TIC organization. Returned to Zohar research afterward, creating the M.O.M.O. Realien series in the process. Joachim's goal is to find a way to meet his deceased daughter again - to create a road to heaven. He is the only person who has discovered the link between Zohar and the intrinsic structure of the universe, but eventually ends up attracting the Gnosis to the human race.

8. Jan Saucer, otherwise known as Ziggy. He was an anti-terrorist cop with a wife and son, then he died, got turned into Robocop by Ziggurat Industries, his wife and son were killed in an 'accident'. The "Tensegrity Project" is the Warp Drive project almost 200 years ago that created Testament and killed Jan's family.


10. Chaos is essentially a nonsensical character based on the Buddhism doctrine in a sense. He speaks with a calm, clear, somewhat philosophical voice. Although seemingly around 16 years old, his true age is unknown. His main characteristics are his deep, clear eyes and silver hair.
He has never told anyone anything about himself except his name, so the path that led him to where he is today, and indeed whether he has any memory of his past at all, is a complete mystery. His existence is similar to that of a ghost of apparition; he causes great things to happen unconsciously simply by being there. He exists because he is acknowledged by others as being there-a way of life he is trying to find a way of dealing with. chaos possesses absolute power, but knowing the history of the ages as he does, he feels a kind of fear of power-especially the power of words-and he never uses it to strive for his own desires. Instead he believes that the future of the universe must lie in people who live the way Jr. does, with the will to live, the will to advance, and most of all a sense of self-awareness. He has no qualms with helping such people.
Since he is knowledgeable of everything in the universe, he will be portrayed throughout the story as a bright, well-mannered young man that always looks at the current situation from a removed perspective. His name means 'chaos'. "

11. In AD 2000, Wilhelm formed the foundation of Vector Industries, which has owned the technology from then till Episode I. He believes in the "Der Wille zur Macht" in each human being and wants to use all this power to save the human race from a "great horrible future" that he envisions.

12. Sellers is a scientist in the Ormus association. A colleague and fierce rival of Joachim, he plagiarizes the results of his research after his death. Sellers is being guided in the background by business or political interests, but apparently this area won't be explored in the Xenosaga series.

13. Allen is the vice project head of the KOS-MOS Project, Vector Development Team No. 1. Holds some feelings for Shion, his boss, but rarely brings these feelings to the forefront. The accident that took the life of Kevin, Shion's former lover, and the inferiority complex Allen held against him, are still too fresh in his mind. A simple and honest young man who speaks freely and easily.

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10 January 2007 00:01 EST | Posted by games6/shiseiten

Xenosaga: Official Design Materials

Gaignun Kukai Jr.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

His mind wavers between the steadiness and the non-steadiness


* Individual attributes

Gender: male
Birthdate: publicly, T.C. June 26th, 4755 (4751 in episode 2-3), officially, June 26th, 4741 T.C.

appearence – 12 in episode 1, transition change to early teenage year in next episodes

real age,
26-27 episode 1-2.
27-28 episode 3.

Episode 1
Height: {~4'7"}
Weight: {~84lbs}

Episode 2-3
Height: {~5'5"}
Weight: {~109lbs}
Chest: 31
Waist: 25
Hips: 28
Shoe size: 6-or-7

Like: History, movies, reading, antique, style, firearm, gambling, weekend, old art, deliberating, achievement, valor, ardor, self respect

Dislike: Insomnia, long hours, irresponsible, rain, carelessness, disagreeing to him, big schedule, high-pitched noise, spinelessness, nuisance


* Affiliation

Representative Director and CEO of the Kukai Foundation

* Enneagram type

According to Enneagram personality classification, Jr, in his connection to
career, is classified with a type-8 characteristic (daring, greatly self-confident, coercive, immoral, temper, confrontational).


Shion Uzuki
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The side of her optimism-like originated in her feeling of nothingness


* Individual Attributes

Gender: female
Born: May 16th, T.C. 4745, age 22, episode 1-2. 23, episode 3.

Episode 1
Height: {~5'4"}
Weight: {~106lbs}

Episode 2-3
Height: {~5'8 1/2"}
Weight: {~119lbs}
Bust: 32
Waist: 26
Hips: 33
Shoe size: 7

Like: Romance, love, quality time, hard work, dedication, flowers, teddy bears, new advances, stillness, shop

Dislike: Ardor, legends, running, annoyances, people unwilling to listen, no substance, being late

* Affiliation

Affiliated with Vector Industry's 1st R&D Division. Chief developer of the KOS-MOS (Kosmos Obey Strategic Multi-purpose Operation System) Development Project
Integrated Operation System.

* Enneagram Type

According to Enneagram personality classification, Shion is classified in her behavior aspect with a type-7 characteristic (talent-rich, impulsive, extreme emotions, guilt, high-spirited).


KOS-MOS
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Give me your pain. Will pain fill me?

* Individual attributes

Outer-surface appearance of gender: female
Outer-surface appearance of age: roughly 18 years old episode 1. roughly new built systems age, 24, episode 2-3

Episode 1
Height: {~5'6"}
Weight: {~203lbs}


Episode 2-3
Height: {~5'10"}
Weight: {~250lbs}
Bust: 39
Waist: 28
Hips: 35
Shoe size: 6

* Affiliation

Vector Industries First R&D Division.

Ziggy
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The man who lives for 100 years with being tormented by sorrow


* Individual attributes
Gender, male. Born in the year T.C.4637, January 5th. His outward appearance is from the
time of his death at age 30.
Height – all episodes – (~6’3”)
Weight – Undetermined -

Like: Taking action, pride, under company, patience, poise, under leadership

Dislike: Attention, inaction, unwilling, unjustified


* Affiliation
Galaxy Federation Government Contact Subcommittee Deployment Equipment

* Enneagram type

According to the Enneagram personality classification, Ziggy is classified as a type 9 (calm / makes other people relax / passive / careless)

MOMO
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
She is dreaming she become a human being


* Individual attributes

Gender: female
Birthdate: Activation unknown, appearance and programs capabilities are at age 12.

Episode 1
Height: {~4'8"}
Weight: {~82lbs}

Episode 2-3
Height: {~5'2"}
Weight: {~95lbs}
Bust: 28
Waist: 23
Hips: 31
Shoe size: 3


Like: Stuffed bunnies, cooking, baking, amusement, dancing undertaking assignments, politeness, sleeping early

Dislike: Lying, offensiveness, antagonism, overeating, stomach aches, cold days, tedium


* Affiliation
Mizrahi lab 100 series prototype used for other 100 series

chaos
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
All his ability and his existence are concealed in the chaos


* Individual Attributes

Gender: male
Date of Birth: unknown
Outward physical appearance: roughly 16 years old, episode 1, episode 2-3, roughly early 20’s.

Episode 1
Height: (~5'7")
Weight: {~112lbs}

Episode 2-3
Height: {~5'7"}
Weight: {~114lbs}
Chest: 31
Waist: 25
Hips: 29
Shoe size: 8

* Affiliation

One of the crew of the cargo & passenger space freighter Elsa, which is under the control of the Kukai Foundation.

* Enneagram Type

According to Enneagram personality assessment, chaos, in his connection to people, is classified with a type-9 characteristic (calm & quiet, giving peace-of-mind to others, passive, distant).

Like: Ocean, nature, animal, earth crust, harmony, small chats, converse, stretching, charms

Dislike: Harm, arguing, cream pudding, misplacing, accusing others

Allen Ridgely
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
His thought is rewarded when all of her is understood


*Individual Attributes

Gender: Male
Born: July 12th,T.C. 4743, age 24 episode 1-2, 25 episode 3
All episodes
Height: (~5'9")
Weight: (~122lbs)


*Affiliation

Vector Industries First R&D Division. Vice Chief of the KOS-MOS (Kosmos Obey
Strategic Multiple Operation System) development project integrated operation
system lab.


*Enneagram Type

According to Enneagram personality classification, Allen is categorized as a Type-6 (devoted, loyal, passive-aggressive, indecisive).

Like: Fishing, prosperity, exercise, jokes, exploring interests, math, bath houses

Dislike: Anger, feeling out of place, loneliness, despair, virtues, uneasiness feelings he gets

Kevin Winnicot
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
He was killed by KOS-MOS, because he protected Shion


* Individual attributes
Gender, male. October 22nd, T.C. 4739~T.C. 4765. Age at death, 26 years old.

* Affiliation
At time of death: affiliated with Vector Industries First R & D Division. The
person in charge of the KOS-MOS (Depend on Order Strategic Multipurpose Control
System) development plan integration and operation system development.

* Enneagram type

Based on the Enneagram personality classification, he is classified as a type 5
(innovative (or reformist) / analytic / extremist / convention breaker).


Gaignun Kookai
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Representative director of Kookai-Foundation


* Individual attributes

Gender: male. Birthdate September 17th, T.C. 4743
25 years old, episode 1. 26 years old, episode 2-3.
Height (~6’0”)
Weight (~146lbs)


* Affiliation

Kookai Foundation representative director.

* Enneagram type

According to the Enneagram personality analysis, Gaignun is classified as a type 8 (gallant / certain).

Albedo Piazzolla
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The behavior filled with his insanity cuts others into pieces without mercy

* Individual Attributes

Gender: male
Birthdate: June 26th, T.C. 4741, age 26-27 episode 1-2, 27-28 episode 3
Height: {~6'3"}

* Affiliation

None.

* Enneagram Type

According to Enneagram personality assessment, Albedo, in his connection to
people, is classified with a type-8 characteristic, But his state is an extremely unhealthy one.
(psychosis, greatly self-
confident, intelligent).

Margulis
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The disappearance of the Ariadne planet, It doesn't matter to him


* Individual attributes

Gender, male. Born in the year T.C. 4723 on March 1st, 44 years old.


* Affiliation

U-TIC Organization. Commander.

* Enneagram type

According to the Enneagram personality analysis, Margulis is classified as a
type 8 (brave / confident in himself / coercive / confrontational).


Edit this Post | Delete this Post
 
 
 
2 January 2007 00:01 EST | Posted by games6/shiseiten

Shion: Guess what. I was watching the news in the Elsa lounge and I saw some two kids that got kidnapped a long time ago appear and you know what?

Jr.: What?

Shion: Well, the older one is HOT. HOT HOT HOT. And he's not even 16! But seriously, I mean... look at him! I am going to hell for this.

Jr.: ….

Shion: But in my defense, he looks more like he's 18 than 15! Right...? Right.

Jr.: I’m not going to say anything on this one.

KOS-MOS: I guess I’m going to hell too. Because, damn, that is a cutie.

Shion: YAY! I'll have someone to share the fiery bench with.

Jr.: …

-------

Tony: I got fined for selling cigarettes to a minor.

Jr.: What?

Tony: Five hundred US dollars.

Jr.: You're bullshitting.

*Tony hands him the summons.*

Jr.: I didn't think they even enforced this.

Tony: Living proof. Me.

Jr.: I thought you never sold cigarettes to kids.

Tony: I don't; you did.

Jr.:*pause* Really?

Tony: Little girl. Maybe five years old?

Jr.: Holy shit. That girl?

Tony: As opposed to the hundreds of other children you let buy cigarettes whenever you show up at work.

Jr.: Then how come you got the fine?

Tony: Because I'm here.
--------

Nephilim: Shion. The time has...

Albedo: Hey, Nephilim! Tell Shion what her brother likes on his cereal!

Nephilim: ...come.

Jr.: ….

chaos: Um..

-----

chaos: Hi.

Jin: Hi.

Matthews: GET A ROOM

Jin: You assume too much. -walks off with Jr.-

Matthews: Not chaos?

Jr.: Don't just stand there; help me! I AM BEING ABDUCTED.

Hammer: No.

Matthews: SHUT UP.

--------

Ziggy: I need to talk to Jr. But looks what’s on his door! I can never see him.

Online: "What do you want?"

Away: "Wandered off, probably."

NA: "Not here. Obviously."

Occupied: "Busy."

Out to Lunch: "I need a break."

On the Phone: "See: Occupied."

Here: “Go away”

Chaos: Oh well…umm I don’t know. I guess he doesn’t like us anymore.

KOS-MOS: I am sadden by this but I will not say a word.

------

Ziggy: Have you ever played Final Fantasy?

Jin: Yeah it’s fun.

Ziggy: Yeah…

-----

Chaos: Transgender!!

Jr.: What?

Chaos: I think it is very strange…

Jr.: I don’t think we should talk about it.

Chaos: ARE YOU?

Jr.: What? No!

Chaos: Hmmm…I have a feeling someone we know is a transgendered.

Jr.: That’s just silly.

Chaos: Is it? Is it silly?

Jr.: Now you got me wondering.

-----

Shion: I must find out about my father.

Jr.: My father was a train wreck. He always-

Shion: SHUTUP!

Jr.: What?

Shion: It’s my story too! We’re supposed to share.

Jr.: I’m sorry to say our game was created in Sexist Japan.

Shion: True. Okay I’ll do what you say…

Jr.: That was quick...

Shion: it’s Sexist Japan, I have to.

Jr.: …

Shion: This book is making fun of its own country.

Jr.: Is that so?

Shion: It’s calling itself Sexist Japan.

Jr.: I said that, not this book.

Shion: Yeah.

Jr.: …

Shion: So nothing matters what I say now. Okay?

Jr.: Um I didn’t say you didn’t have to say anything..

Shion: I’ll do anything you say.

Jr.: Anything…?

Albedo: PLEASE STOP IT!

Jr.: …? What?

Albedo: Nightmares…stay AWAY.

Jr.: What are you talking about?

Albedo: It’s nothing. Let’s continue our verbal abuse on Sexist Japan and why you get to crack the whip on your lackeys.

Jr.: Don’t call them lackeys. They are contemporaries.

Everyone: Awwww… we think.

Albedo: No. They are your minions!

Jr.: I’m not running a depraved army here.

Albedo: I bet you gave them all names TOO. *points at Jin* The devil ninja *at Ziggy* The flaxen warrior, *at KOS-MOS* the sex appeal, *at chaos* the neigh-sayer, *at MOMO* the luring snare trap, *at Shion*, right hand woman.

Jr.: Yes that’s all their names. You got it.

Ziggy: I don’t understand this.

Albedo: You are the brave warrior of death. Jin is the quick dark ninja full of hate, KOS-MOS is the seductress to foil others plans, chaos is, well.. NEIGH!!, MOMO is the cute girl making people think she is a good person when you all come in and slaughter everyone distracted by her cuteness, and Shion is your evil personal assistant.

MOMO: I don’t like this fixture.

Albedo: I say nothing but the truth, peche.

Jr.: Come on my minions let us go.

Albedo: No sarcasm allowed, missy.

Jr.: Missy?

Albedo: Missy? Missy who? You!

Jr.: cute.

Albedo: SHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Jr.: see ya.

Albedo: Wilhelm how did I do this time?

Wilhelm: Three more mask intervals.

Albedo: Yes!

-----

KOS-MOS: MERRY CHRISTMAS!

MOMO: *holds up mistletoe* Anyone?

Albedo: Don’t mind if I do, peche.

Jr.: Oh God, that is just sick.

Albedo: Don’t you dare use this mistletoe with Shion!

Jr.: ..Why would I?

Albedo: Oh phew…so it truly was a dream.

Shion: Jr. come here!

Albedo: DON’T GO, BROTHER. DON’T GO! SHE’S A SUCCUBUS!

Jr.: Shutup Albedo, let go of my leg!

Albedo: No no no no no no no pleeease.

Shion: Jr…? Don’t you want some fruitcake I made for you? It’s for being such a good person in charge to all of us… I made all by myself...

Albedo: NO RUBEDO! SHE PROBABLY PUT SOME SEDATIVES IN IT SO SHE CAN PLAY WITH YOU!

Jr.: Oh God.

Albedo: NO NO NO NO NO NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.

Shion: Oh well I guess MOMO will get some.

Albedo: *lets go* PECHE!!! NOOOOO!!! DON’T EAT IT.

Jr.: ….

Shion: Is he alright?

Jr.: He’s been acting rather strange lately.

MOMO: Albedo tickled my chest!

Jr.: Whoa, what??

Albedo: Tee hee!

MOMO: Jr. is Santa coming tomorrow?

Jr.: Um,

Albedo: I’M SANTA!

MOMO: Nevermind…

Albedo: Peche gets me for Christmas.

MOMO: NO! *prepares a slap and backhands Jr.* oops.

Albedo: HAHAHAHAHAAAA. You rascals play nice now!

Jr.: Just shutup Albedo. And MOMO if you do that again I’ll lock you up in the cabinet.

Chaos: We know how MOMO can be a little grating sometimes…but that was just plain rude.

Jin: And on Christmas. Yeow.

Jr.: Sorry.

Chaos: Yeah Jin is right.

MOMO: Where’s my present!? I wanted a kitty!

Jr.: I got you a stuffed one.

MOMO: yay!

Albedo: My peche deserves me for Christmas.

KOS-MOS: Woe is me. No one wants a kiss from I.


Edit this Post | Delete this Post
 
 
 
15 October 2006 00:01 EDT | Posted by games6/shiseiten

*15 years ago, the Yuriev institute has a fire drill in the middle of winter*

Albedo: *shivers* It's coooold! *whines*

Rubedo: Shut your face.

Nigredo: ... Well it is pretty cold….

Rubedo: Dammit! They should let us back in!

Albedo: That's what I'm screamin'. Waaaaaaaaaaaaah

Yuriev: Alright, children. You can go back inside.

Rubedo: Man, this fire drill sucked. Lame.

Albedo: Didn't it, though? It sucked a cold ass, too.

Nigredo: *eyeroll* Guys...
--------------

Albedo: you ate WASABI?! (no one i know can go near that stuff...)

Jin: Yeah, I dab a little of it on the ginger and dip it in soy sauce and it's good!
Sometimes I get too much. Then my nose burns and my eyes water and I almost die.

Albedo: so calm about it.

Jr.: That’s Jin for ya.

Albedo: I'm allergic to cheese but i like pizza.

Jr.: whatever analogy

Albedo: Stick a fork in me, Rubedo I'm dyin'.
----------

Shion: I got 9 lives!!

Jr.: Err, you don't mean 190481203821 lives

KOS-MOS: *uses revert* HA!!!!!!! *does a split*
------------

Shion: Jr………….Jr…JR.

Jr.: …?

Shion: Can you drive me to Miyuki’s?

Jr.: Can’t you?

Shion: No, I can’t drive till next year because I ran over a moose….

Jr.: Fine, but its dark outside.

Shion: I have to go and chit chat with her about Allen and how he stuck a whole fish bowl in his mouth.

Jr.: Okay okay! Get in.

Shion: This is snazzy.

Jr.: Yeah it’s Gaignun’s His is faster.

Shion: Smells like…white chocolate.

Jr.: *drives* I hate Miltia two lanes.

Shion: SHE LIVES OVER THERE!

Jr.: ……

Albedo: SURPRISE SURPRISE

Shion: EEEEEEEEEEE!!!

Albedo: PULLING SOME FUNNY BUSINESS ARE YOU??????

*minutes later*

Jr.: Okay phew, I locked him up in the trunk somehow.

Shion: HURRY HURRY PLEASE!!

Albedo: *knocks* Knock knock who’s there? FRENCH NINJAS. Sneaky bastards.
They're extinct now.
They took their own life after learning of the French's reputation…
Or they all turned japanese,I wouldn't know.Or killed off by the ninjas. Or Pac-Lady ate them.

Jr.: *growl* I KNEW this would happen.

Shion: Can I eat in the car?

Jr.: *shrug* not mine, go ahead.

Albedo: FOOD of LIES

Albedo: Gimme your nuts!

Jr.: WHAT?

Albedo: I want nuuuuts.

Shion: Nuts?

Albedo: MY SUNDAE IS BARE.

Jr.: Turn where?

Shion: Um..

Jr.: HURRY UP!

Albedo: Hey yo yo yo yo yo. I need an empire to overthrow…

Shion: The small street..

Jr.: Okay whatever house it is I’m leaving you here. Go.

Shion: …. *slowly crawls out*

Albedo: HO HO HO HIPPITY YEE HAW

Jr.: *bangs head on steering wheel*
-------------

Jr.:*kicks KOS-MOS* Androids are easily amused with Internet-speak!!

KOS-MOS: Y HULO THAR
---------


Edit this Post | Delete this Post
 
 
 
15 October 2006 00:01 EDT | Posted by games6/shiseiten

KOS-MOS: Should I dye my hair???

Jr.: *shrug*

KOS-MOS: Blonde, red, black, brown?

Jr.: Blonde. Possibly black? Nah, too Mary Magdalene. Blonde.

KOS-MOS: You think so?

Jr.: *shrug* Yeah

KOS-MOS: Would I be… what humans say, hot? Sexy?

Jr.: Why are you asking me?

KOS-MOS: ………opinions!

Jr.: I said it already...

KOS-MOS: shank you. I bid you good day.

Jr.: Did she just say shank??

----------------


Albedo: *pops out from under desk* NO GOES!!

Mary: Albedo's coming out of the desk!

Gaignun: I KNEW IT. *puts on chastity belt*

----------

Albedo: Throw my balls at him!!

Mary: AH!..wha…what?

Albedo: NO! I contributed those pool table balls! Throw THOSE at HIM.

Mary: ......oh

Jr: yaoi fiend.

Mary: WHUT

Jr.: Jokin’

----------

Gaignun: *tele* ALBEDO! Why is Jr hiding underneath the pool table? Did someone say his safety sentence?!

Albedo: *laughs*

Gaignun: Albedo, answ-- Mary! Stop poking him with the pool stick!

Mary: Oops

----------


Shelley: I found something!

KOS-MOS: THAT'S NOT A PLAYTHING, THAT'S MY ARM!!! GIVE IT BACK, WENCH!

Shelley: OW! the arm's slapping me!

Albedo: MAKE IT SPANK YOU!

Arm: *materializes a gun and shoots Albedo*
------------

MOMO: Ziggy? Why is Jr. screaming that he feels like he's being torn apart?

Ziggy: He's a masochist maybe?

MOMO: What's a m—

Ziggy: Google it.

------------

Jr.: I feel kind of bummed today…

*people start flocking*

MOMO: Feel better!

Gaignun: Please do

Albedo: you suck.

Shion: Aww Jr. if you ever need a shoulder two cry on you know where I live and stuff.

chaos: OH MY GOD. Jr. Stop wearing my shorts!

Albedo: Not him, I took them! HAHAHA

Ziggy: You need help.

Juli: ...Gaignun Kukai Junior I made you a gift basket to help you feel better.

Hammer: You’re so sad all the time

Jin: Get well I want to go on an adventure!

Mary: JUNYA YOU'RE SAD AGAIN Stop being sad; I’ll give you kisses!

Shelley: Life sucks, don't it?

Allen: You are so mean to me. Feel the pain of being sad.

Kevin: *steals a kidney* *runs*

Allen: OW! *falls*

Helmer: ...I had no idea you were sad these days, Rubedo.

Matthews: Hi Little Master? Be a man and kick people in the rear, that's all I'm sayin'.

Tony: AH HA meet any cute girls for me?

Jr: Tony, shut up.

KOS-MOS: My sincerest apologies... *has blonde hair*

T-elos: You're sad. That’s what you get for shooting holes in my legs.

Wilhelm: Inferior beings are always sad.

100 Series Realian #31324: Awww...

Miyuki: Don't be said. Girls will get rid of all the worries out of you if you know what I mean.

Canaan: Beer's on me, man. Rough day for us all.

Yuriev: Good thing you’re not cutting yourself, eh?

Sakura: BOO! Cheer up, buttercup.

Citrine: *laughs*

Virgil: Sorry.

Sellers: Like I care.

Margulis: GROW A PAIR

Pellegri: ... sorry to hear that. Get better.

Jr.: ….wow. I feel a little better now.
---------

Albedo: Show, don't tell-

Gaignun: Don't you dare!

Albedo: *points to Gaignun* *yells* HE’S GAY!

Jr: WHAT?

Gaignun: I'M NOT!
---------


Jr.: *fluffs up hair* Bad hair day or what?

Ziggy: It looks the same.

Jr.: Nooo it's all kinds of nasty right now. *fluffs*

Ziggy: ……….

Jr.: *puts head down and fluffs hair*

MOMO: *strolls in, shoots everyone with glitter, strolls out*

Jr.: *sprays and ruffles hair* Grr! *brushes it out*

Ziggy: Getting Ziggy wi-- MOMO, are you shooting people again?

Jr.:Ow tangle

MOMO: No.

Jr;:*brushes fervently*

Albedo: CAT CAT CAT LIES!

Jr.: *fluffs roughly*

Gaignun: Jr., stop messing with your hair it’s annoying me.

Jr.: *grumbles, small ruffle up*

-----------


Jr.: Okay, I think everyone is sufficiently leveled up now! Time to kick some A!


MOMO.: Albedo starts with A...

Albedo: *yawns* You bore me.

Jr.: *kicks his A*

Albedo: Don't be knockin' my role model.

Jr.: Your role model is a piece of burnt toast!

Albedo: …………

Jr.: *smirk*

Albedo: I'll let it slide, THIS TIME. It's not often that you burn me.

Albedo: But beware the... cereal. Yeah, your CEREAL. Especially the milk part. [smug] Yeah, you.

Jr.: You're into cereal now?

Albedo: hahahahaaaa

Jr.: ………
----------

KOS-MOS: *shows off her version 3 armor*

Jr.: ... ... *raises eyebrow*

KOS-MOS: *uncomfortable*

Shion: Don’t worry KOS-MOS you only keep this armor for about 4 or so hours in the game. It will be ok.

KOS-MOS: *rolls around with a straight face*

Jr.: I never get to look at anything! *hands in pockets*

KOS-MOS: *keeps rolling. Rolls off cliff*

Jr.: Well, that sucks even more.
------------

Albedo: MOMO FLAVORED TEA!

Virgil: Brains? Realian brains?
-------------

Jr.: *raps*

Gaignun: *does a beat box*

Albedo: And you guys tell everyone that I'M the crazy one?!

Gaignun: Sorry, man.

Albedo: WHAT THE HELL

Albedo: Rubedo can't rape!

Gaignun: You mean rap.

Albedo: Either/or.

Albedo: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH…a dream? WHY! ALWAYS! *hides under bed*
-----------

MOMO: *eats a bowl of cherries*

Albedo: *plucks a cherry out of MOMO's hand and squeezes it until it bursts* Haha! I popped your cherry!

MOMO: Aaaah, that's not funny!

*a little bit later*

MOMO: JR.!!! Albedo popped my cherry!

Jr.: WHAAAAAAT?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!? *rage*

MOMO: *holds up the fruit that Albedo crushed* See? I was eating cherries and he took one and popped it!

Jr.: ................................Oh nevermind then.

Albedo: *holds up a Pea Shooter* And I popped them good! *shoots cherries at Jr.*
----------------

Ziggy: I've never used a Mac before.

Jin: You may have to, sooner or later!

Ziggy: I wish Macs and PCs would have nice computer mating and make a hybrid compy. Now THAT would be awesome.

Jin: I KNOW!!That'll be so great. Just think, a PC that NEVER crashes (or very very rare).

Ziggy: That would be pure electronic love.
---------------

Shion: I FOUND JR.’S JOURNAL, GUYS!

Everyone: *huddles*

Chaos: LET’S READ IT! HURRY!

Shion: He doesn’t write much..

Jin: expected, now HURRY I WANT TO READ.

---
i hate albedo
he did bad stuff to poor little momo
and now i have a cold sore


---

i am shorter than my bros
BUT I HAVE THE DURANDAL
AND THEY DONT!!
AHAHAHAHAHAH

---

No one will give me any today.
I’m so aggravated!!

---

ALBEDO IS STUPID
i said at least i don’t do it in cofee pots
and then HE HIT ME OVER THE HEAD
I AM V. ANGRY NOW

---

i like big guns
and big ships
and big breasts

---

albedo said my earring
is gayer then those gay things on gaignuns jacket
Oh please.

------

my brother albedo keeps calling me rubedo
thats my real name
i do not like my real name
ALBEDO SUCKS
I HATE U ALL!!!
But the ladies can call me anything they want.

---

albedo laughs at me
I GET SO MAD
then he laughs more
AND I GOT MAD AGAIN
why must he mock me so!!!
at least im not a pedophile

---
Do I look good in leather?
I check in the mirror often, I look so flashy, yeah.
----

I need to start thinking about my life before death comes and hits me with his scythe up the ass
----

WHY DID YOU DO THAT GAIGNUN?!?!?
now I have to—
[here the ink is blurred]
---

Shion: He’s not very descriptive..

Jin: what man is?

Albedo: HAHAHAHA *steals journal* I’M GOING TO RUB THIS IN HIS FACE

 

Edit this Post | Delete this Post
 
 
 
14 October 2006 00:01 EDT | Posted by games6/shiseiten

Ziggy: *belches*

Albedo: BLESS YOU!

MOMO: *rolleyes* Idiot.

Albedo: I KNOW SOMETHING YOU DON'T, CHILD >O

MOMO: NOT AGAIN. Like what?

Jr: *telepathic* You tell her again and I'll KILL YOU.

Albedo: *tele* Do we have to explain this again?!

Jr: *tele* Well, er... I'll make you WISH you were dead! I'LL RIP OFF THE HEADS ON ALL YOUR DOLLS!

Albedo: NOOOOOOO YOU WOULDN’T

MOMO: Well? Are you going to tell me?

Albedo: Uh, erm, *thinks* YOU HAVE A SHUT OFF SWITCH A DIS ACTIVATE BUTTON IF YOU WILL.

MOMO: Liar! That’s only when I’m hooked up!

Albedo: Whatever you do, DON'T TOUCH THE BACK OF YOUR LEFT KNEE.

MOMO: YOU touched the back of my left knee that time you oogled me, and nothing happened!

Albedo: Ziggy and you’re ma still play patty cake WITHOUT YOU!!!

MOMO: Like... the game where you clap your hands and stuff? *confused*

Albedo: YES

Albedo: They clap their legs together, too.

Ziggy: OKAY SHUT UP

Jr.: Aw sick, man. I’m out of here.

MOMO: Wha...?

MOMO: I DON'T GET IT!

Jin: I'm laughing my ass off...

Shion: So am I!

Albedo: They clap their—

Ziggy: SOCK PUPPETS!

Albedo: *scream* WHERE?! *looks around*

MOMO: Ziggy, I don't get him. YOU tell me.

Ziggy: ...

Ziggy: ...

Ziggy: Want to get some smoothies?

MOMO: Yes! But I want Jr. to come, too!

Albedo: Oh, he's coming alright...

Jr.: *noises in room*

MOMO: *jumps* What was that noise?

Albedo: CALL OF THE WILD, that's what.

Albedo: And the... fulfilled... *bursts into tears*

Gaignun: Lonely guy, huh? *giggles*

Albedo: S-shut up.

MOMO: Albedo, if you weren't such a creep, I'd hug you.

Albedo: HUG ME >O

Albedo: Uh I mean, *puppy eyes*

MOMO: I don't wanna! You'll grope me again!

Albedo: *bigger puppy eyes*

Alby: Arf, I must learn that.

MOMO: I-I'm not giving in!

Albedo: *tries harder*

Jr: *walks in* Try any harder and your eyeballs would explode!

MOMO: Gaaaah! I can't resist! *hands Albedo a Hershey's Hug* There's your hug!

MOMO: Hi, Junior!

Albedo: *is a little stunned*

MOMO: *backs away* whee!

Albedo: I MISSED MY CHANCE

Ziggy: Uh, Jr.? XYZ.

Jr: WHAT???

Albedo: *giggles like mad*

MOMO: What's that mean?

Albedo: eXamine Your Zipper.

MOMO: You need to learn how to eat with ice cream still... Jr.

Albedo: DEELICIOUS WEENIES.

Albedo: I'm sorry, that's SHION'S line

Shion: *walks in* WHAT?

MOMO: Shion, you need to learn to eat ice cream, too! What's that on your cheek?

Ziggy: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Ziggy: You're a SLOPPY youngun.

Shion: What are you talking about?

MOMO: *holds up mirror*

Shion: Oh..

Albedo: *cackles*

Shion: QUIET, YOU!

Albedo: heeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee NEVAR!

*sometime Later*

Albedo: Don’t make me play the cymbals AGAINS

MOMO: You butt!

Gaignun: DEELICIOUS WEENIES

Albedo: I don't ever want to hear him say that again. XD

Gaignun: DEELICIOUS WEENIES.

KOS-MOS: STOP IT

MOMO: *cries* Albedo, make her stop!

Albedo: *grabs KOS-MOS's coffeepot* Watch it!

KOS-MOS: You would not.

Albedo: *grabs the zipper at the front of his bodysuit* Oh wouldn't I?

KOS-MOS: Not my coffee noooooo

Albedo: Mmmm... the smell of coffee is very arousing.

KOS-MOS: *bites an ear*

KOS-MOS: *grabs a doll* I'LL SET HER ON FIRE! >O

Albedo: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

KOS-MOS: PUT DOWN THE COFFEEPOT!... slowly

Albedo: *does so*
!
KOS-MOS: *drops doll and runs away*

MOMO: Why do you need the cymbals?

Albedo: I told you...


Jr.: *telepathically* It wasn't m-m-m-AAAAHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Albedo: OW MY HEAD! DON't KAME ME COME IN THERE

MOMO: In your head?!How would you get in your own head?!

Albedo: Like this! *rips off his head and shoves his arm inside it*

MOMO: *faints*

Ziggy: Man, you are twisted up in the head! *picks up MOMO*

Albedo: *regenerates*

KOS-MOS: oh, noooo

Albedo: Lookit me, I'm Peter Pan...

Albedo: TIME TO DROWN.

Albedo: *laughs*

Jr.: *screams*

Albedo: Okay, that's it. *bursts into the room* OKAY, YOU PROSTITUTES, BREAK IT UP! I am having déjà vu it would seem….

Jr.: ALBEDO!!!

ALBEDO: *throws things at him*

Shion: *hides under the covers*

ALbedo: OH NO YOU DON'T! *grabs her ankle*

Jr.: LEAVE HER ALONE! *grabs his gun off the bedside table and shoots Al in the face*

Shion: EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!

Shion: The only shooting you need to be doing is—

Jr: SHUSH, the door's open.

Albedo: *regenerates* I don't know why you even bother, Rubedo! HAHAHAHAHAHAAAA LOSER

Jr: there was no Barbie to RIP THE HEAD OFF OF!

Kirshwasser: AH

Jr: ... No offence, Kirsh.

Albedo: Hey, Rubedo...

Jr.: Yeah?

Albedo: SHION’S hot when she's naked!

Jr.: SHADDUP! *shoots*

Shion: You're shooting him for THAT?

Jr.: I don't want him saying stuff like that! ...he's right, though. *flirty grin*

Shion: hee *edges closer*

Albedo: GEEZ YOU BUNNIES. THIS IS NOT PART OF THE GAME AT ALL, BREAK IT UP! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
WHO MESSED WITH THE SCRIPT? AHHHHHHHHHHHH WHAT IS HAPPENING

Jr.: That's not a new one. Be ORIGINAL, Albedo. *cuddles Shion*

Albedo: How about a genetic weapon and a possible uberhuman?

Ziggy: *singing* *walks in* OH MY GOD IT'S AN ORGY.

Jr.: Hell no it's not!

MOMO: *follows Ziggy* EEEEK! Shion, Jr.... why are you guys in the bed together?

Albedo: PATTY CAAAAAAAAAAAAKE!

Gaignun: *wants to yell DEELICIOUS WEENIES*

Jr.: Umm.... well, because....... dammit! I dunno what to say!

ALbedo: hahahahah! sucker.

Jr.: I'm not a sucker!

Shion: Technically, you are. You sucked my ti---

Ziggy: SHOOSH! There's a kid in here!

MOMO: The correct term is Nipple

Ziggy: *is floored*

MOMO: I know THAT much.

KOS-MOS: I do not understand-

KOS-MOS: *gets it* JUNIOR.

Albedo: took her long enough

Jr.: ........

MOMO: .........Ziggy,
should I like ,slap him or something? I've seen that done in movie.

Ziggy: Sure. Go ahead.

MOMO: GRR *slap*

SHION: STEP OFF

Jr.: *rubs his face*

Shion: *hug face*

Jr.: Mmph! Yer suffocatin' me!

Shion: *kisses face* SORRY.

Ziggy: Get a room! Another Room!

Gaignun: ……

Shion: Go to hell, all of you!
*reaches under the covers and starts groping Jr.*

*everyone flees room*

Kirshwasser: ahhhhhhhhh

Shion: That worked!

Jr.: Y-yeah...

Albedo: Whar's my Kirshwasser?

Jr.: Up your butt and around the corner!

Shion: Shh... *puts her head under the covers *


Albedo: *tele* I HOPE YOUR TROUSER SNAKE FALLS OFF.

chaos: *tele* What th?!

Albedo: *tele* No, not you, go away, Jesus.

Jr.: *screams*

Albedo: Dammit, not again!
What's she doing, biting him? WHAT’S HAPPENING!?

chaos: Most likely.

MOMO: *cry*

Albedo: You look like you need a hug!

Ziggy: Getting Ziggy with it-- STEP OFF ALBEDO

Albedo: *picks MOMO up and hugs her*

MOMO: Lemme GO!

KOS-MOS: Cooking is so fun, cooking is so fun;
now it's time to take a break and see what we have done.

KOS-MOS: Yay! It's ready

Jr.: *screams*

KOS-MOS: *plugs ears* .....

MOMO: *bursts into tears*

KOS-MOS: SHION

KOS-MOS: *barges in* WHAT ABOUT MY AAAAARM?

Albedo: I seen this before! OH NOOOOOOOOOO what is happening!?

KOS-MOS: YOU GOTTA FIX IT.

Jr.: She can do it later! We're having some alone time right now!

KOS-MOS: *rips off arm and throws it at him* NO.

KOS-MOS: *retrieves arm and begins hitting him with it*
You are distracting Shion from her job, are you not?!

Albedo: oh noooo

Jr: Ouch, ouch, you're hurting me!

Shion: KOS-MOS!

KOS-MOS: He'll be fine. *wraps up Shion in a cover and leaves*

Albedo: HAHAHA

chaos: DEELICIOUS WEENIES.

Jr.: *wakes up* S-shion...? Where are you...?

Albedo: *is in his face* YOU GOT SERVED

Jin: what a horrible thing to wake up to

Shion: *fixes KOS-MOS*
I can't believe you did that to him. I need to program you to be less selfish!

KOS-MOS: I did what I had to to get repairs done, Shion.
You of all people should know that.

KOS-MOS: By the way... are there any pancakes lying around?

Shion: chaos might have some.
He probably keeps 'em in those smashing new pants of his.

KOS-MOS: …..

Shion: Sure. I designed you to be anatomically correct, after all.

chaos: Uhm hi.

KOS-MOS: Run. While you still have control over your LEGS.

Shion: ???

KOS-MOS: Never you mind, Shion. *goes in Stealth Mode* ...chaos?

chaos: *goes poof*

Shion: He scares me sometimes.

Jr.: Shion! Where are youuuuu?

Shion: I'm still fixing KOS-MOS.

Jr.: *walks in* Dammit.

KOS-MOS: *exit Stealth Mode* HELLO JUNIOR.

Jr.: Hiya. *gives Shion googoo eyes* Are you almost done fixing her?

Shion: GO AWAY

KOS-MOS: I can FIX that need of yours.

Jr.: Nooooo!

Shion: KOS-MOS, you touch him and I'm turning you off.

KOS-MOS: Oooookay… *searches for a loophole*

Shion: *goes over to Jr. and kisses him* Just sit here while I finish fixing her, okay ?

KOS-MOS: Hurry up, la de da. *throws a wrench*

Shion: I also gotta program some patience into you! *finishes fixing her*

KOS-MOS: yaaay *throws skittles at Jr* ha! I'm not touching him.

Jr.: C'mon, stop that!

KOS-MOS: I will now, cause she's done. Good bye, and stay out of my bed thing. I WILL KNOW YOU'VE BEEN IN THAR

Jr.: Dammit, I was wanting to try it in there....
But I bet she'd be madder than Gaignun was when he
found out we did something on his desk.

Gaignun: *tele* NO SOUP FOR YOU!

Albedo: *wakes in bed* AHHHHHHHHHHHHH AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
oh..oh dear..it…it..was all just a dream? … oh my.
Oh MY! PHEW! THANK GOD!

KOS-MOS: *throws skittles*

Albedo: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!
-------

Jr: *walks in limping*

Gaignun: OH MY GOD!

Jr: Stop that! I was fighting U-TIC and I was horse riding this weekend.

chaos: *walks in and Albedo Neighs* Cool.

Albedo: *neighs whenever chaos is around*

KOS-MOS: *almost chokes on popcorn*

Shion: Okay, WHY is Jr. passed out on the floor? Is he drunk again?

Albedo: Yeah, drunk on chaos'…

chaos: LIES!

Albedo: DRUNK ON HORSES.

MOMO: AH

Jr: *wakes up* Uhm, no!
That's like, a drink-thing. ALBEDO SHUTUP! I’m tired of your lies.

Shion: I want some HORSES

Albedo: *eyeing chaos* Oh, there's enough for everyone.

Shion: huh?

Albedo: NEEEEEEIGH. *points to chaos*

Albedo: HAY CHAOS! YOUR BRAIN IS LIKE AN ASS!

MOMO: Awww, he said "ass..."

Albedo: I'll say it again! ASS ASS ASSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

MOMO: I'm not hearing this! I'm not hearing this! *covers ears*

Albedo: *gets up in her ear* ASS.

MOMO: *shoots Albedo with glitter and pretty pink flowers*

Albedo: CAT CAT CAT *falls over*

MOMO: *giggles*MOMO MACE.

KOS-MOS: "Beat back the albino mind-rapists with glitter and sugar! Use MOMO MACE"

Gaignun: *wields a pop cane*

Albedo:*picks up a gun* Excuse me while I shoot my ears off repeatedly.
And then my head. *exit stage left*

chaos: *resists urge to make a joke about Jr. and Shion*

-----------------

Albedo: Jesus,you’re so silly. That was just my dream, nothing happened, everything is cool.

chaos: AAAH DANG.

Shion: OH! Virgin flavor!!

Jr: what?

Shion: OH! I meant cherry.

Jr: Stop, just stop it.

Albedo: Cats in the mix!

Shion: Vanilla?

Jr: No, licorice.

Shion: oooooh.

Albedo: WHAT!!!!!!!

Shion: we’re talking about smoothies…

Albedo: Oh my oh my oh my… phew..

---------------

Shion: I'm juuuuust about to go to bed here, I think.

chaos: what? sleeping on your keyboard? that hurts I think.

KOS-MOS: it might, the keys press into your cheek and stuff
--------------------


Jr: *screams* No Shion, that hurts!

Shion: Take it like a man, will ya?

Albedo: hmmm what!? *listen through door*

Jr.: Wait, I don’t think that will work..this way..

Shion: Press that! Now! AHHH now!!

Jr.: No! You’ll ruin it..

Albedo: *convulse*

Shion: I’m pressing it. Hmm…

Jr.: *aggravated growl*

Albedo: *bites on fingernails nervously*

Jr.: …stop it..please.

Shion: Alright this is the way to go then.

Jr.: Yeah…yeah…good job.

Shion: Tee hee!

Albedo: *bursts through door* GET OFF MY BROTHER YOU STANK HO!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ………….ah!

Shion: EEE!!! *hides under panel*

Jr.: WHAT? ALBEDO!!!

Albedo: I..I thought… oh my oh my..

Jr.: you thought what?

Albedo:..

Shion: I decided to help Jr. update the security here on the Durandal. *points to panel*

KOS-MOS: *hooked onto it with many cords* Me as well, I will be the network for the
Durandal for about 12 whole months until Gaignun Jr. updates a new one.

Albedo: PHEW!!!! Thank GOODNESS. Peace, I’m out!

Jr.: *sigh* I tell ya…


Edit this Post | Delete this Post
 
 
 
12 October 2006 00:01 EDT | Posted by games6/shiseiten

KOS-MOS: JUNIOR, I HATE YOU

Jr.: I hate you too then.

KOS-MOS: That tattoo sucks by the way.

Jr.: What makes you say that?

KOS-MOS: Because it's true and I just felt like it.

Jr.: I think it's a little uncalled for to insult someone's personal art. Especially since it's irrelevant to the original topic.

KOS-MOS: *head spins*

Jr.: WHOA
----------------------

chaos: *fade into the kitchen*

random egg: chaos, I need you.

chaos: ...

Shion: MY SCRAMBLED EGGS JUST TALKED TO MEEEEE

Kevin: Scrambled, all right!

Wilhelm: One more word and you're fired.

random egg: Eat me.

chaos: ...

random egg: You want me too, chaos.

chaos: WHAT?

random egg: I mean, eggs. You want eggs.

random egg: In your a--

chaos: That's it, I'm going vegan.

Albedo: Possessed talking eggs? I'm on it!

Albedo: Waiiiiit... that's too crazy, even for me.

Albedo: I'm out of here. Eggs asking for Jesus is where I draw the line.

chaos: GET OUT.

random egg: Waaa--

chaos: *SMITE*

sausage: Hello.

chaos: *WRATH*

Kevin: ... a SAUSAGE?

Wilhelm: Kidding, kidding...

random pie: Mmmm...

chaos: ...

---------------

Shion: Aww, I love you so much.

Kevin: Wow-ee!

Jr.: …

Shion: aw I love you too, like a puppy or somethin'. KIDDIN' FRIEND

Albedo: Snoogans is a better fish! He will now destroy you for calling him a goldfish....Nice knowing you...

Jr.: You are all mad.

---------------

Jin: I keep wanting to call him Fritter. The food. Fritter. That Wilhelm.

KOS-MOS: I KNOW WHAT IT IS.

Jin: ARE YOU SURE?

KOS-MOS: it's like an apple pastery.

Jin: Explain. I don't converse with apples.

KOS-MOS: an apple doughnut thing in bakeries...and it's ...and...iced..

Jin: oooookaaaaaaaaay...
----------------------

Jr.: I want to look out the window in peace...

Albedo: Hey Rubedo, I'll look out YOUR window.

Jr: I’m blocking you from my head.
--------------


Shion: *sits around waiting for something to happen*

chaos: *shows KOS-MOS what he's hiding in his pants*

100 Series Girls: *all screech and scream*

Jr.: OH MY GOD, CHAOS!!! Put that thing back in your pants! You’re upsetting the crew!!!!!!

Shion: ... I don't know what's going on. I am blissfully unaware of all this. I don't even know these people!

Albedo: *strolls by* Hey, Jesus

chaos: ... *puts it away*

KOS-MOS: *blinks vacantly*


chaos: *wears his swimsuit*

Jr.: Let's walk over here.

chaos: Yes.

Jr.: What's wrong?

chaos: I can't walk!

Jr.: I'm not surprised. That swimsuit is very tight.

chaos: OW PAIN

Albedo: *strolls by* Hey, Jesus!

chaos: ...


chaos: *wears his Jesus dress*

Jr.: I didn't know you were just a sweet transvestite!

chaos: I'm not! This is just more comfortable than the swimsuit, that's all.

Jr.: Whoa, man! Watch out for that---

chaos: *trips over a random object* Gah! *falls*

Jr.: WHOA! You didn't tell me you go commando when you wear that thing!

chaos: Well, everyone did, back in the day…

Albedo: *strolls by* Hey, Jesus!

chaos: .......... *cries*
---------------------

Albedo: I got electrocuted and burnt by the toaster!

MOMO: Why?

Albedo: I’d rather not talk about it *limps away*
----------------------

Jr.: *puts on half a mask* I'M THE PHANTOM OF THE OPERA,*plays a pipe organ*

Albedo: Ba-boom pshh!!!
--------------------------------

MOMO: ELBOW! ELBOW LOVING!

Albedo: We should do th--

Jr.: Don't touch me.

Albedo: *ELBOWS*

Jr.: OW MY SIDE

MOMO: Albedo, you meanie! It's supposed to be consensual!

Albedo: You MAD, girl?! I'll elbow anyone I like!

MOMO: ...

Albedo: *singing* Elbow room, I need some elbow room.

MOMO: ...

Albedo: *gets on the subway in Japan* Elbow room, I need some elbow room.

People: ...

Albedo: *gets on the Durandal Train* Elbow roo... wait. No one rides this thing.

Sellers: Zing!

Jr.: IT'S A CRACK AT ME, ISN'T IT.

Albedo: Hey Wilhelm! ELBOW FUN?

Wilhelm: Sure, I enjoy pop culture references.

Albedo & Wilhelm: *do the elbow*

Other Testaments: *chanting* ELBOW! ELBOW!

Albedo: WOO

---------------------

chaos: So, did you study abroad when you were younger?

Jr.: Well, actually, I studied lots of broads. *smirk*

chaos: I guess some things never change!
----------------------

Albedo: *does a little dance*

Jr.: I see you’ve adjusted to the boxers.

Albedo: Well, I wouldn’t quite say that.

Jr.: You went back to the briefs?

Albedo: Nope! Wrong again.

Jr.: ...oh no.

Shion: What, what?

Jr.: Don’t you see what’s going on here? No boxers, no briefs...

Shion: *backs up* Ughhhh…

Jr.: The only thing between him and us is a thin layer of spandex!

Albedo: I’m out there, Rubedo, and I’m lovin’ every minute of it!
---------------------------

 

Edit this Post | Delete this Post
 
 
 
10 October 2006 00:01 EDT | Posted by games6/shiseiten


chaos: *rearranges his crotch area*

Jr.: ….

chaos: ... I just molested myself.

Jr.: …..

------------------------------------

Shion: I have a question for chaos.

chaos: Yes?

Shion: Are there exploding people in hell?

chaos: ... *blinks* I beg your pardon?

Shion: ARE. THERE. EXPLODING. PEOPLE. IN. HELL. ?.

chaos: ... I really don't have an answer to that. I've never been there, after all. Maybe you should ask Wilhelm?

Shion: Well, are there some in heaven, then? If there aren't, then they must be in hell!

chaos: I can guarantee that there are no exploding people in heaven.

Shion: Yaaay! I get exploding people in hell!

chaos: ... you're weird.

Shion: Do you want a pet hedgehog?

chaos: Me?

Shion: Yes, you.

chaos: Er... that's okay. I think I'll pass. It would be hard to keep it on the Elsa, and I don't think Captain Matthews would like it.

Shion: Dammit.

chaos: Maybe MOMO would like to have it?

Shion: Err... no. Would you like some haricot verts instead?

chaos: String beans? *blinks* Sure... I don't see why not.

Shion: *hands chaos a box of beans*

chaos: Er... thank you... *takes the beans and puts them on the Elsa*

Tony: ... Okay, what did you put in those?

----------------------------------------------------
Albedo: Would it weird you out if I told you I cry when I masturbate? I need two tissues for that.

--------------------------------------------
Chaos: OH MY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Jr.: Huh?

Chaos: I need to use the restroom.
--------------------------------------------

Mai: *singing* I love Leupold/Leupold don't lie/I love Leupold/Almost as much as—

Gaignun: Hello Mai.

Mai: AAH GHOST!

Gaignun: ...

Mai: ...Yes?

Gaignun: Have you seen Canaan lately?

Mai: Not since he got molested by fans after starting that stupid talk show of his.

Gaignun: I'm rather worried about him.

Mai: And I think you're gay for him!

Gaignun: What?! No I'm not!

Mai: Are you suuuure?

Gaignun: Yes I am!

Mai: Yes you're sure, or yes you're gay for him?

Gaignun: I... I... uh… shut up!

Mai: Okay. Let's go find your lover Canaan.

Gaignun: Yes, let's... ... ... Wait! I mean—

Mai: Hahaha!

Gaignun: Oh dear.
---------------------------------------------------

chaos: It's cold out here! *shivers*

Jr.: It is?

chaos: I can see your…

Jr.: What?

Chaos: in your shirt…your you knows.

Jr.: Oh… er…

Chaos: *snicker*

Jr.: Oh shutup.

chaos: Okay I’ll stop looking now…

Jr.: Yes. Hey, look. There's Mai.

Mai: *freezes and points at Jr.* Oh my God, look at his nipples!

chaos: We've already discussed this.

Jr.: *puts arms across chest* I don’t know what you’re talking about.
-----------------------------------------------

Jr.: I think when Big Willy found out about Febronia and Virgil, he must have thought "You got laid on an altar dedicated to my archnemesis? YOU'RE IN." so now Virgil is a testament!? Am I right? Or am I right?

Shion: FAIL

Jr.: Zip it.

Chaos: I think I agree with him…

Ziggy: Me too.

MOMO: *raises hand*

Jin: Perhaps.

KOS-MOS: *nod*

Shion: UGH.

Jr.: I know, I’m great.

chaos: Also, COMMUNION WINE IS NOT A LUBRICANT.

Jr.: I was going to say those little wafer cookie things.

chaos: WAFERS ARE NOT... uh, what DID you use them for?

Feb: Dental dams?

chaos: AAAAHHH

Jr.: Wow. This brings eating Realians to a whole new level!

-----------------------------------------------

Jr.: When I count to three we go in and kill any living thing in sight, okay?

MOMO: But Jr.-

Jr.: Now’s not the time to get scared MOMO.

Ziggy: Uh-

Jr.: Shhhh…1…

Shion: I don’t think we should-

Jr.: SHUTUP. 2…..

KOS-MOS: *blinks, eyes narrow*

Chaos: *extremely nervous*

Jin: *gulp*

Jr.: 3!! *kicks door* *shoots people*

People: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH*dying*

Everyone else: *stares*

Jr.: Why isn’t any one helping me!??? *kill kill kill*

Ziggy: We’re on the Durandal…

Jr.: .............................................................................................. *drops guns, stunned*

Albedo: *rolls around on the ground laughing so hard he can't breathe*
-----------------------------------------------


Kaiba: CALL GOD

Yami Yugi: NOT SO FAST, KAIBA! You activated my trap card.

[Yami Yugi slams down a card]

Yami Yugi: CHOKE ON MOUTHWASH!!

Jr.: People actually watch this?

MOMO: *dancing to theme song*

Jin: YU-GI-OH IS ON!!!
------------------------------------------------

chaos: Want me to "Lemegeton" you?

Shion: Oh my God.

Jr.: That was dull.

KOS-MOS: Yes. Shall we proceed to my room?

Jr.: ….
----------------------------------------------

Jin: WE’RE IN THE PAST, IN CHINA

Jr.: It smells.

MOMO: I’m hungry, does China have food?

Chaos: My nose is tickling me.

Ziggy: Look, that sign says “Please take off the shoe.”

Jr.: …one shoe, okay *takes one off*

Shion: Don’t be sarcastic, they don’t speak our language.

Jr.: If it says take off “THE” it means one. “THE” shoe. Not “THE” shoes.

MOMO: Mandarin, like mandarin oranges, yum.

Ziggy: ….

--------------------------------------------------
Albedo: COME HERE

chaos: You're gonna pull down my shorts and expose me if I go over there! T_T

Albedo: You know me well…

----------------------------------------------
MOMO: Mystic Powers

Jr: It's in the fridge next to the milk.

MOMO: What are you talking about?

Jr: Huh?

Jin: …?

----------------------------------------
Voyager: You are so beautiful...

Ziggy: Awww, you're so sweet, Erich.
-----------------------------------------

Shion: I’m quite bored to tears.

Jr.: I’m…stimulated.

Chaos: WHAT

---------------------------------------------

Albedo: Happiness is like peeing in your pants. Everyone can see it, but only you can feel the sensation.
------------------------------------------------


Posted by games6/shiseiten at 8:28 PM EDT
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Thursday, 6 October 2005


 
1 October 2005 00:01 EDT | Posted by games6/shiseiten

ALBEDO: Well, just play along! I got a bet riding on you, too! I'll show Voyager up yet! Then Ziggy will owe me.

**ALBEDO picks up his clothes and leaves.

CHAOS: What was that al... nevermind. Nephilim will tell me later.

MIYUKI: Nephilim?

CHAOS: Oops. [wiggles fingers in MIYUKI's direction] You never heard that.

MIYUKI: [blank] Heard what?

CHAOS: [kisses her on the cheek] That's my girl.

JR: [scoff] Women's Tao?

CHAOS: What rubbish is that? (?)

GAIGNUN: Good rubbish. It worked on Shion.

**JUNIOR and SHION laugh. Although SHION does this nervously.

GAIGNUN: [nervous] Well... did it? Tell me.

SHION: Er. Only girls can do it.

JR: I said no take-backs.

SHION: [angered] Take-back this!

**SHION picks up and throws a coffee mug in JUNIOR's direction. Just at that moment, WILHELM entered the kitchen and catches it with one hand.

WILHELM: [scolding] Shion! I'm dissapointed in you. It's bad enough we had coffee swiped out of our hands, and a naked man serving it.

JR: [defiant] I saved your life!

SHION: B-boss! It's not what it looks like.

WILHELM: Oh? It sure looked like you were chugging mugs at your man. One of them, anyway.

SHION/JUNIOR: [stunned] My man? My man?!

WILHELM: I know. It surprised me, too. I guess his fanbase wasn't too far off. [to ALLEN] Allen. You shouldn't be with this girl. Oh, and neither should you, Miyuki.

MIYUKI: But I'm not-

MOMO: We heard everything.

MARY: Junior! How could you?!

JR: Quiet, you're not my wife.

MARY: She isn't either! ...And you're pregnant?!

JR: [scream] Oh my god!

WILHELM: Mary, don't be silly. It's the other way around. Junior may have got something from her, though. Like a cold.

SHION: [reflex] From Allen!

ALLEN: What?!

WILHELM: Your fault.

MARY: Ha, ha! [ponts to JUNIOR] You all caught the stupid from Allen!

JR: Oh, yeah? Well, you're gonna get it from me if I have a say in it.

**MARY's dumbfounded. She runs.

JR: Yeah, I'm gonna get you!

WILHELM: I hope you don't take habit to harassing your employees.

JR: At least I don't kill them.

MARY (V.O.): I'd rather die!

ALBEDO (V.O.): That could be arranged. Hahaha!!

SHION: All I did was go to Junior's to eat cherry vanilla mochi!

ALLEN: [screaming] Code! It's code!!

WILHELM: Cherry vanilla! We aren’t that stupid! We're all adults here. We know what that means!

MOMO: Why the cherry, though? [suspicious] Am I involved, somehow?

WILHELM: You forget. You're a peach. Momo means peach.

MOMO: [sheepish] Oh... I forget. My sister, you know. Her name was Sakura.

[Silence]

SHION: But, but, but but... [meekly] it's my favorite.

JR: I can vouch. She eats it whenever she's sad.

ALLEN: Well, you must have depressed her.

MIYUKI: [giggling] Yeah, Junior. You're no Albedo.

JR: Shut up damn it!

GAIGNUN: This is all a big misunderstanding, Sir.

WILHELM: I don't care to hear it. We all had enough for the night.

**SHION's house begins to empty.

WILHELM: Well, assuming that you're feeling well, I'll see all three of you in the morning.

MIYUKI: Yea... bye.

**WILHELM exits, followed by MIYUKI, MOMO, ALLEN, and eventually CHAOS. He leaves with an apologizing shrug.

SHION: This just didn't happen to me.

GAIGNUN: It did.

SHION: I need some mochi.

**WILHELM returns.

WILHELM: Can you at least wait til I leave? I'm taking this mug of coffee on the table, here. I'm going need it.

**WILHELM exits again, taking a long swig of the coffee.

GAIGNUN: I need some mochi, too...

**ALBEDO returns, fully clothed.

ALBEDO: I'm off the phone now. Wow, the coffee was sure a hit. It's all gone.

SHION: If there's any luck for me, boss'll be dead by morning.

ALBEDO: Silly woman. Cow milk doesn't kill. Hahahaha

JR: You're calling yourself a cow, now?!

ALBEDO: According to the magazines, I am. Sad society. Look how anorexic I'm looking. And they call it fat. Sad world, I'm telling you. [claps hands together] Why all the sad faces?! I got money to roll in. You mentioned mochi. You ladies need some mochi. I'll buy. It's all on me. Shion just made me rich, it's the least I can do. Hehehehe

GAIGNUN: I'm not depressed.

ALBEDO: Sure you are.

SHION: I already have three boxes! What you can do is kill Allen.

ALBEDO: You mad, woman?! I wouldn't get near that emotional thing. Killing him would be mercy. I don't do mercy. You already know this. Besides, three boxes isn't going to help you. You need a bucket… a bucket of ice cream! Now let's go.

**Reluctantly, everyone follows ALBEDO out the door.

 


[ELSA DINER AND COFFEE HOUSE- table -NIGHT]

KOS-MOS: There's a 85% chance you're joking, Albedo.

ALBEDO: Joking not! Three of those buckets of ice cream there. We're depressed!

GAIGNUN: I'm not depressed.

ALBEDO: Yea, you're just emotional. Get a sweater to cry on. Hahaha! Oh, and a kiddie box for Rubedo here. Hahahaha!

JR: Gimme a bucket damn it!

KOS-MOS: Albedo, I will allow the purchase of three buckets of ice cream. However, because of your build I doubt you can consume a bucket of ice cream, Gaignun Kukai Junior.

JR: You'd be surprised.

KOS-MOS: I am not taking that chance. There's a 75% risk. I could have a lawsuit on my hands. I am sorry. [to Albedo] By your manner, I assume money is no objection?

ALBEDO: [grinning] Nope. Lay it on me!

GAIGNUN: Not literally.

KOS-MOS: I understand he's not to be taken literally, Gaignun Kukai. I will be right back. Which flavors would you prefer?

ALBEDO: Uh, coffee.

GAIGNUN: Vanilla.

JR: Bubble gum sherbet.

ALBEDO: How childish!

JR: Shut up!

SHION: ...Cherry vanilla.

KOS-MOS: I will be right back. [leaves]

JR: After all that, you'd still eat cherry vanilla flavoured anything?!

SHION: I can't help it! It's my favorite!

ALBEDO: Whoo boy. I suggest you get a new favorite. When people hear those two words in the same sentence... [makes a pow sound] misunderstanding.

GAIGNUN: There's too much slang out there. Anything can mean anything.

ALL: Hear, hear.

JR.: Like, bang. It used to be the sound for a gun.

SHION: Or 69…..

ALBEDO: No, that's a pretty old one. Since the sixties, at least. Or the Cesear. I think he coined it or something. (?)

SHION: [frusterated] I wouldn't know!

ALBEDO: If your choice of ice cream is any indication, you shouldn't.

**SHION growls. KOS-MOS returns with three buckets balanced on one arm, and a small box for JUNIOR. She passes them out, and goes back to work. Everyone begins to dig in. Especially Albedo. Literally. With his hands.

JR: Damn! I wanted a bucket!! Albedo, I demand you give me some of yours.

GAIGNUN: [to JUNIOR] Coffee flavor. You sure of that?

ALBEDO: No, Rube. Grow a few inches, and hair on your chin. Which is never! Hahaha! And as for you, Nigredo, stick your hands in your ice cream. It's the only way to enjoy it.

GAIGNUN: I knew you've been talking to him, Junior. No!

JR: Shut up! You forget who's older than you by a mere 10 seconds!

ALBEDO: As long as you look like that, who cares?

JR.: GOD DAMMIT!

SHION: [muffled] Will all of you shut up… please?

**Everyone turns to see that SHION has stuck her entire head in the bucket.

JR: You're gonna die! Suffocate! Get out of there!

SHION: [muffled] No. [chewing sounds] I don't care.

ALBEDO: What are you doing! The night is young! You can't die yet!

GAIGNUN: Yet?!

ALBEDO: She can die after I buy her a gold-lined noose. Or at least a new oven to stick her head in. I'd be ashamed to put my head in that thing. Or food.

JR: Albedo, you're insane. And it's three in the morning.

SHION: [muffled] For crying out loud, it's night! It's dark out! [chewing sounds] Dark as my soul!

JR: [raps SHION's bucket with a spoon] Come out of your bucket and say that.

GAIGNUN: You're still arguing about that?! Maybe you should marry. Seriously…

**SHION says nothing. JR pouts. KOS-MOS passes over the table.

KOS-MOS: Shion Uzuki, is something the matter?

ALBEDO: You have to excuse her. That time of the month. You know how the chant goes.

KOS-MOS: [squints at SHION] You are correct. It is best to leave her alone.

ALBEDO: Check that! Lucky guess. Women's Tao, works

SHION: Aiiyaaa!

ALBEDO: Come out of that bucket and say that!

KOS-MOS: But that isn't the only reason.

JR: What, you double as an observational Realian?

KOS-MOS: I am equipped with observational technologies usually reserved for the 100-Series, yes.

ALBEDO: Oh, nothing big. She slept with Allen. Rubedo, too.

JR: Did not!

ALBEDO: And I'd like to see how many people believe it. I have another bet going on. Kevin's house is mine! Anyway. You should be with MOMO, anyway. Jailbait should date jailbait.

**JUNIOR throws his box of ice cream at ALBEDO, who catches it.

ALBEDO: [laugh] More for me, sucker. Thanks. Hahahaha

JR: I hope your head gets blown off from it!

ALBEDO: Trivial. It'll just grow back, stupid. Hahahaha!

KOS-MOS: My emotional response is to vomit in the lavatory. Please excuse me. [leaves]

SHION: [muffled] Why did I ever program that?

ALBEDO: Because you're stupid? Oh, Rubedo dear, catch.

**Without warning, the coffeepot KOS-MOS left behind is thrown at JUNIOR. He doesn't catch it, and it spills all over him.

JR: Damn it, Albedo!

ALBEDO: [disapproving] That's also why I could beat Nigredo. Both of you are too slow. Shion's the only fast one here. Sad.

SHION: [muffled] I can still hear you! (?)

ALBEDO: [ignoring her] Yes, that really isn't good for you. Lay off the salmon. Fattening junk.

The end
[KOS-MOS appears one the last page as a "soup nazi"]

KOS-MOS: ROAR. [throws a spoon] NO SOUP FOR YOU.


Edit this Post | Delete this Post
 
 
 
23 September 2005 00:01 EDT | Posted by games6/shiseiten

Jin: And, you say you want to help them?

Shion: Yeah.

Jin: I can't understand that. Isn’t Little Master a professional in that field? It's not
something that an amateur should stick her nose into.

Shion: An amateur? I've been quite helpful to him! Right?

Jin: Well, anyway, rest up today and tomorrow we can go visit Father and
Mother's graves.

Shion: Brother, wait! That again? How many times have I told you I'm not going
there? I hate it. I never want to go.

Jin: Even if you say that, it's your duty as a child to at least put one flower
before your parents' graves...

Shion: Stop it! And what do you mean, "before their graves". Father and Mother
aren't even in that cemetery! You know where the two of them are, don't you?
Yes, the only ones there then were me and you! If you... If you had only come a
little earlier!! Father and Mother would...! ...I'm sorry. I didn't mean to...
I... (gets up) But, I still don't want to go to the cemetery... (walks out)

(The rest of them walk into another room)

Jr.: W-well, I'd better get going... It's about time there...

Jin: I am sorry for showing you something so embarrassing.

Jr.: Oh, don't be... Is it all right?

Jin: Do not worry. We are brother and sister of the same blood.

chaos: Sorry, would you mind if I stayed? Of course, only if you would not mind.

Jin: I don't mind at all. Please stay over. Shion will surely be pleased as
well.

Jr.: All right. Don't worry about us. MOMO's analysis is tomorrow, so just come
back in time for that.

chaos: All right. Thanks.

(Jr. leaves; next scene is Jin outside at night)

chaos: You're out here?

Jin: It's a nice voice, isn't it? Whenever I can't sleep, here always relaxes
me.

chaos: Is it about Shion?

Jin: Yes. Well, it's been two years... I still thought she was a kid, for some
reason. I think she gets that personality from her grandfather.

(A moth burns itself on the candle)

Jin: So, what did you want to ask? You're here because you want to talk, yes?

chaos: Well, Jin... I was wondering if you... The U-TIC Foundation...

Jin: It's about that incident, is it... 14 years... It was so long ago, but it
seems like something we did yesterday. Anyway it seems to be a spell from which
I cannot escape. Did I bring it upon myself? The hunter-gatherers of mankind who
started that history, soon they discovered how to manipulate fire. From there
they took up blades. A consciousness reaching toward the future, with time, is
also changing it. When they started making offerings to gods, those people acted
having forgoten the existence of their origins. If you think about it, we humans
may be fluttering into the candlelight, just like moths [actually leaf-beetles],
without knowing the end waiting for us there. (blocks the moth from the candle
and it flies away)

chaos: Jin...

Jin: I'm sorry to have bothered you with all of this. She's an awkward little
sister, but please continue to take care of her for me.

chaos: It's not...

Jin: I could not be by her side for that "most painful time". And now, I still
cannot be close for her. I must be scared. If I try to be any closer to her, she
may not accept me as her own family, as her own brother. I am afraid of that.

chaos: Shion mentions your name in any context. I think that means she cares for
you. That's what I think it means.

Jin: ...And then, she suffixes it with, "my worthless brother", right?

chaos: Well, sometimes...

Jin: But, it's strange... I feel like I can talk to you about anything. Like
you're much more mature than I, like you've lived hundreds of years. That's the
feeling I get from you.

chaos: Nah, it's just my relaxed nature. That's why Jr.'s always saying to me,
"You're slow, idiot!" (They laugh.)

(Morning at the Uzukis')

Shion: Sorry to keep you waiting!

chaos: You have a very different atmosphere when you're out of uniform.

Shion: Really? Do I look weird?

chaos: Not at all. It looks good on you.

Shion: Thanks.

chaos: Is it all right to leave without saying anything to your brother?

Shion: It's okay. Because of what happened yesterday, I wouldn't even know what
to say if I saw him. Anyway, I'm sorry that I can't come with you to MOMO's
analysis. I'm pretty busy too; I can't just leave Allen on his own, and I'm
worried about KOS-MOS.

chaos: It's all right, there's no need to worry. The analysis itself won't be
that difficult, and everyone from the Foundation will be helping.

Shion: Tell MOMO to do her best for me.

chaos: Okay, I will. See you. (leaves)

__1.2.11: U.M.N. Administrative Center__

Gaignun: (She) should be arriving soon.

Jr.: But, meeting with a specialist member of the subcommittee...

Gaignun: That just shows how important it is. To the subcommittee, and to her.

MOMO: Mama?

Juli Mizrahi: It's been a while.

Gaignun: I'm glad to see you are well.

Mizrahi: I'm very grateful for your efforts in the Proto Merkabah incident.
Allow me to offer my thanks as a representative of the subcommittee as well.

Ziggy: MOMO played a major part as well. Her work was excellent.

Juli: I see. Good work, MOMO.

MOMO (brimming with excitement): Mom!!

Mizrahi (walking past MOMO): I'd like to sort out some materials. If you could
arrange for a room where I can get organized, I'd be thankful.

Jr.: Keh….

Mizrahi: MOMO.

MOMO: Yes!

Mizrahi: Once this business settles down... Wouldn't it be nice to live
together?

(MOMO barely squeaks out a noise of agreement. Mizrahi and Jr. leave.)

Ziggy: That's good.

MOMO: Yes.

Shelley (appearing): Now, MOMO-chan, come this way.

MOMO: Yes!

[some gameplay]

(Jr. approaches Mizrahi as she is working)

Jr.: Ms. Juli... What's going on?

Mizrahi: With what?

Jr.: With you suddenly saying nice things to MOMO, yeah?

Mizrahi: Is it unnatural? Joachim designed that realien to evoke motivation from
familial warmth, correct? If so, then in order for this research to go smoothly,
isn't fulfilling that parameter required as my professional duty?

Jr.: I knew it, it's just for your work. If you keep acting like such a cold
person, you'll end up being the one who gets hurt…you know.

Mizrahi: The one who made that realien was Joachim. I'm scared of it.

Jr.: I don't know what kind of person Joachim Mizrahi was. I don't know what
purpose he had in creating the 100-Type. But, I have a promise with Sakura.

Mizrahi: with Sakura?

Jr.: So I plan to treat her appropriately as the child she appears to be.

Mizrahi: What kind of promise do you have?

Jr.: She said, "protect my mom and my little sister". Ms. Juli, laugh again.
Sakura would have wanted you to.

(chaos walks in, and Mizrahi leaves)

chaos: Was I interrupting something?

Jr.: No, nothing! But, is Shion all right?

chaos: Yeah, I don't think there's any need to worry. That family just seems to
be complicated.

Jr.: Pretty complicated... Well, I guess I can't really say anything about
that.

[gameplay]

(Mizrahi wakes up Ziggy in his chair)

Mizrahi: How are you feeling?

Ziggy: Professor Mizrahi!

Mizrahi: MOMO asked me to come. "Mom, you're a famous scientist, so you should
know a lot about cybernetics, right?"

Ziggy: But... my tuning...

Mizrahi: I'm not a young woman. Don't worry. "Famous scientist"? If you ask me
I'm more "infamous".

Ziggy: You seem uncomfortable with MOMO. Why?

Mizrahi: Can I love a thing that looks like my daughter, but is not my
daughter?

Ziggy: That is a difficult question.

Mizrahi: Even if she looks just like my daughter, her spirit will not return.
100 Types all around the star cluster, looking like that, just keep painfully
reminding me of her death.

Ziggy: The one who made them look that way, was your husband?

Mizrahi: Yes... Do you have any children?

Ziggy: One son. He was a very energetic and intelligent child, but he died in
an accident.

Mizrahi: I'm sorry. Is that the reason you committed suicide?

Ziggy: Yes, it is.

Mizrahi: Perhaps, when my daughter died, I should have done so as well. But the
places that should have held sadness, were filled up by anger at my husband.

Ziggy: Maybe you are just a strong person.

Mizrahi: No, I am just wicked.

Ziggy: Professor Mizrahi. This is my personal opinion, but, is it possible for
you to think that you had two daughters?

Mizrahi: What do you mean?

Ziggy: One has died, and one is still alive.

Mizrahi: Are you telling me to treat MOMO not as just a copy of my daughter, but
as an individual person? You bring up such a difficult subject!

Ziggy: Please consider it.

Mizrahi: I will think about it. I had better be going.

Ziggy: Thank you for the tuning.

Mizrahi (leaving): You are welcome.

Ziggy (trying out his hand-mechanisms): Why don't you come in? I said that
eavesdropping is a bad hobby.

(Jr. and chaos enter)

Jr.: Ah, we didn't intend anything bad by it. But hey pops, I really can't pin
you down!

Ziggy: What do you mean. I don't understand what you are saying.

Jr.: Hmph! You’re brainless!

Ziggy: More importantly, I think it is almost time for MOMO's analysis. People
with responsibilities should not be hanging around here.

Jr.: Shit. We'd better hurry up and get back.

[gameplay]

(In the lab, MOMO is standing in a circle of lights)

Mary: No need to be nervous, MOMO! This is all just preliminary preparations
for the analysis.

MOMO: Yes. I'll do my best. (Ziggy nods to her) MOMO is a self-tuning type, so
MOMO has always performed tuning while in bed. Receiving tuning like this makes
me feel like Ziggy.


Ziggy: It's all right. You don't need to be scared.

100-Type: For the analysis, I will be shutting down your personality
simulation function. Simultaneously, your emotion display function and your
abstract recognition function will be shut down. Please do not worry.

MOMO: [something; kiji?] emotion...

100-Type: Personality simulation is a completely personal option, so it has no
effect on the observational function.

MOMO (thinking): MOMO's heart is... just an optional function?

Ziggy: MOMO...

(Their hands reach out to each other)

100-Type: Personality layer, sleep mode complete. Shutting down function.

MOMO: Ah-- (goes limp)

(Ziggy closes his eyes and Mary keeps typing. Fade out. Fade back in on the
group watching from the next room.)

Helmar: How is she doing?

Mary: MOMO's analysis preparations don't seem to be making much progress. Not
only are there difficult barriers, but because of the hacking that occured,
some routes have been damaged.

Jr.: Hmm... Her personality layer is shut down right now, yeah?

Mary: Yes. I feel like we are doing something terrible; my heart hurts. On Old
Miltia 10 years ago… when we were prescribed medication, I felt empty inside. I hated it.

Jr.: Right… I remember… sorry… I couldn’t…

Mary: It’s alright. I know you tried everything you could. Even we bold, human-like creatures feel that way. If we're told our
heart is something like a lie, I think it'd really hurt us.

Jr.: Our hearts could just be toys created by God. (Makes to leave)

Shelley: Little Master. Is it acceptable for you not to be present?

Jr.: It’s like 10 years ago... I’m going to go lay down. I'm nervous..

Shelley: Little Master.

Jr.: Because I'm a coward...

(Jr. Leaves. Fade out. Fade back in on the procedure continuing.)

100-Type: [Technobabble and countdown]

Mary: Just a little longer, MOMO. The pain will be over soon. When it's over,
let's go play somewhere fun.

100-Type: Final barrier pattern decoded. Releasing all protection.

Mary: MOMO?

MOMO (struggling to speak): ...No!

Mary: MOMO, what is it? Are you trying to say something?

MOMO: This... is... a... trap!

(The 100-Types collapse)

Shelley: This...?

Guy: High levels of interference from an invisible region on the high-speed
channel.

Mizrahi: Defensive logic 68% destroyed. Emergency abort... rejected! Terminal
being opened to the U.M.N. network. Invasion cannot be intercepted!

Guy: Multiple axons being connected in the deep zone! Large-scale holographic
network being reorganized!

Ziggy: Professor Mizrahi. This is--

Mizrahi: Even if we study every system individually, we won't find anything.
The low-resolution bits of every layer-- Like splinters of memory inlaid, all
activate at once, and link all of the images. Joachim set it up this way.
[sourei na something]. Re-execute abort sequence! Reconstruct external hacking
defense logic!

Girl: Yes ma'am! Restarting defense logic! ...It was rejected.

Ziggy: MOMO!

Mary: MOMO!

MOMO: I'm... sorry... MOMO... didn't... notice...

Gaignun: No, this is--!

Mizrahi: An internal trap is present. This is not Joachim's design. It's
newer... This was done while she was captive in that "Tower of the Song".

Gaignun: Albedo's trap!?

Girl: Defense logic will be destroyed in 20 seconds! (Mizrahi takes the seat
from her) All developmental data could be compromised!

Ziggy: Professor Mizrahi. What do you intend to do?

Mizrahi: To use the emergency code and delete the data.

Ziggy: Ridiculous! If you do that, MOMO will--

Mizrahi: I have no choice! If we do not prevent the Y-Data from falling into
enemy hands...

Ziggy: Professor Mizrahi!

Mizrahi (hesitating over the button): MOMO... (She withdraws her hand)

Guy: Professor Mizrahi! The holographic network has begun to self
disintegrate. The developmental data will be deleted!

Mizrahi: What!? I haven't--

Ziggy: What is this?

Mizrahi: MOMO... MOMO herself is rejecting her nervous circuits and dispersing
her memories! To protect what Joachim has hidden, she is self-destructing her
mind!

Ziggy: What!

Mizrahi: MOMO! (MOMO collapses)

Girl: 100-Type prototype system functions stopped!

Mizrahi and Ziggy (rushing to her): MOMO!

Albedo (appearing on all screens): Hey there!

 

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4 September 2005 00:01 EDT | Posted by games6/shiseiten

2nd half...of part one anyway

(Back in the present)

Allen: Chief! Wait, chief. What's wrong? You seem strange today.

Shion: No, I'm the same as always.

Allen: Where are you headed?

Shion: To the town for a bit. It's been a while...

Allen: Been a while...? Oh yeah, you are originally from...

Shion: Right. The 8th district. Hey, Allen... Don't take your eyes off of KOS
MOS, okay?

Allen: Oh, all right... Why? (Shion walks away) She is very strange today.

__1.2.9: Moby Dicks Coffee__

Shion: Ah, I thought so! Hey bartender!

Bartender: Eh?

Shion: Hello!

Bartender: Ah, I thought "who could that be?" and it's Shion! You've become a
woman since I last saw you, when you were in high school!

Shion: Haven't I? It's been so long. Have you moved here?

Bartender: Well, I couldn't compete with the redevelopment... But at least the
inside of the store has remained the same.

Shion: Yeah, Moby Dick's has to look like this!

Bartender: Well, sit down! The usual?

Shion: Sure. And I'm kind of hungry, so something to eat too.

Bartender: Got it. So, is it your day off?

Shion: I wish it was. Unfortunately I have work. I've got some business at the
Second Branch.

Bartender: That's right, you are working for Vector. I heard from your brother.

Shion: Oh, my... brother... comes here?

Bartender: Oh yeah, quite often. What, you haven't seen him yet? You came all
the way back, you should at least see him once.

Shion: Even you... Even though you know I am uncomfortable around him...

(Someone comes in)

Bartender: Ah, speak of the devil...

Jr.: Look, chaos! The atmosphere is just like [p-quad?] in here!

chaos: Shion?

Shion: What are you two doing here?

Jr.: Ah, we were just hungry...you know...

chaos: ...and we happened across this place.

Bartender: Oh, friends of yours?

Shion: Ah, something like that...

chaos: "Something like that" is not a very nice way to say it...

Shion: Oh, I'm sorry, I'm just a little shaken up.

chaos: Shaken up? Why?

Bartender: Shion's family is a little complicated.

(in Helmar's office, Gaignun and the Godwin sisters arrive)

Gaignun: I'm terribly sorry we're late.

Helmar: Welcome! Ah, Shelley and Mary have gotten quite big!

Mary: Uncle Helmar! Been a while!

Shelley: Mary! It's "Helmar-sama"!

Helmar: Ah, don't worry about it. I feel like I have two daughters of my own.
So, Mary, have you been keeping up your accomplishments?

Mary: Oh, yes. I have been busy but I'm trying to become the best comedian in
the star cluster! My sister won't act as my partner, so lately I've been
thinking of scouting the Little Master!

Helmar: That's great. Make sure to invite me.

Mary: Yes!

(Helmar and Gaignun nod; Godwins leave)

Helmar: It's not very pleasant news, but... In addition to U-TIC's there have
been some other suspicious actions.

Gaignun: Yes.

Helmar: The peace treaty of 14 years ago was the best plan of action during the
chaos of the time, but I can't say that everyone has been upholding it
completely. That strain is now becoming apparent in the Federation. According to
Captain Roman, one faction seems to have the threat of an armed rebellion. The
Second Miltia government is observing lookout procedures, so you at the
Foundation should be very careful as well. Because as it is, right now you have
the Zohar Emulators and the 100-Type prototype in your pocket, and that makes
you a target.

Shelley (returning): Gaignun-sama... I have brought MOMO-chan.

Helmar: The 100-Type prototype.

Gaignun: Thanks. Bring her in.

MOMO: (Very polite introductory greeting). I am the 100-Type Observational
Realien Prototype, MOMO. I have completed brief internal-data research.

Canaan: 100-Type Realien.

MOMO: You are a Recording Elemental Expansion Type? (Polite phrase expressing
gratitude for future acts).

Helmar: She indeed looks much more like her than the mass-production models do.

Gaignun: Yes. She is surely Professor Mizrahi's posthumous child.

Helmar: I see. Fate is truly a mysterious thing. You have overcome much danger,
and done well. Now you will be analyzed at the U.M.N. Administrative Center. We
are prepared to support you in every way we can. Please accept your duty without
worry.

MOMO: Yes. Thank you for your concern. (Leaves, bows)

Helmar: Nigredo. There is a job that I must ask of you.

Gaignun: Search out the enemy?

Helmar: I'm sorry.

Gaignun: Don't be. It's my responsibility in the first place.

(Gaignun steps out and telepathically links with... Albedo!)

Gaignun: All right boy, where are you?

Albedo (Flying in E.S. Simeon somewhere): Nigredo!

Gaignun: Hey. I see you're doing hopelessly well as always.

Albedo: I see you're as skillful a talker as always. What's wrong? Were you
lonely? You worthless thing.

Gaignun: What. I'm just looking for a little information. And leaving the
possibility for a peace agreement.

Albedo: A peace agreement? McCartney said that black and white should get along.
Hahahaha... I know what you truly are. "Executioner".

Gaignun: I threw away that position long ago.

Albedo: Is that so? Aren't you just sticking by Rubedo hoping for a chance to
perform your professional duties? I'll be borrowing Rubedo. You're on the
outside of this, anyway. I'm really looking forward to what you'll do!

Gaignun: Wait! That-- (his eyes flash, and Albedo's arm blows up)

Albedo: Scary, scary! You've always been that kind of guy... Showing such a calm
face, but hiding fangs of death. Hahahahaha... (fades away)

Gaignun (to self): He is going to try linking to U-Du after all. And, what is he
planning to do to Rubedo?

(Back at Moby Dicks)

Jr: Mmmmmm allright!!!!

chaos: I see, this place is Shion's roots, when it comes to curry.

Shion: You figured me out! Oh by the way, how is MOMO? All right?

chaos: They say the main scan will be tomorrow. Looks like there's no problems
so far.

Jr.: That's how it is. We had some extra time, so we came to town.

Shion: Oh.

chaos: What about you? Did you turn over KOS-MOS yet?

Shion: Yeah. I kind of left it up to Allen. It could take a while depending on
the situation.

Jr.: Did something happen? You look depressed....

Shion: Oh, some things... And, I'd been with her for a long time, so parting was
kind of difficult.

Jr.: Hmm, is that how it is....

chaos: Well, for example, what if you were told you had to give up your
treasured Carles [is this some type of gun? help me, gun people] scope, how
would you feel?

Jr.: Oh, that would be terrible. My wallet and my heart would both be sad.

chaos: See?

Shion: Could you please not compare Jr.'s collection and KOS-MOS?

Jin: Good day, bartender.

Bartender: Ah, welcome! It's funny that you should come in; Shion just-- Uh?

(Shion is no longer in her seat)

(Jr. gives away her presence)

Jr.: Hmmm Where's Shion? Uh! Drum playing? Your heart..? Shit! I don't know, what is it Shion?

Shion: Not so loud!

Jin: Shion? And, that's a voice I've heard somewhere...

Shion: Uh... It's been a while...

Jin: I am Jin. Jin Uzuki. It's a pleasure to meet you.

chaos: The pleasure is mine. [as if they haven't met]

Jin: So, you are Shion's companions. Has my foolish little sister been troubling
you?

Shion: "Foolish" is a bit much.

chaos: Not at all. Shion has been taking quite good care of us.

Jin: Is that true? You don't need to mind just because she is here.

Shion: Brother!

Jin: Hm, I am not feeling very welcomed...

Shion: It's not that, I just--

Jin: Bartender! I'll have the same thing. Extremely spicy.

Shion: Hey, would you listen when people are talking?

Jin: I'm listening. So, what were you saying?

Shion: Nevermind, I'm tired of it.

Jin: Really, if you had told me you were coming I would have come out to meet
you. How long are you here?

Shion: Oh, I was very busy, and as soon as we arrived I had work to do... And I
have to be ready to go back to the main branch by tonight--

Jr.: What?? You said we had a while--oi!!

Shion (kicks Jr.): It's nothing! Nothing! (Her phone rings) Oh, who could that
be?

Allen: Chief! Hello. About KOS-MOS... It's going to take two or three more days
before [some technobabble about coding]. It looks like we're going to be
lounging around here for a while. Uh, what's wrong, chief? You seem unhappy.

Shion: (sigh)... Could this be [harassment of newcomers]?

Allen: Huh?

Shion: Nothing. The timing of your report was good enough to bring me to tears.
Thank you.

Allen: Wait, chief!

Jin: I see. Lounging around for a while, is it?

Shion: I understand. I'll go. I'll come home. Are you happy?

Jin: Ah yes, how would you two like to come to our home? It's not very far from
here.

Jr.: What should we do?

chaos: If we were to come, we would interrupt the two of you siblings being
reunited... (Shion begs) Ah, uh, sure, we would love to come, for a bit. Thanks
for asking.

__1.2.10: At the Uzukis'__

Jr.: chaos, look, this house is made of *wood*!

chaos: Yeah, and on top of that, look! It's amazing; this place is a bookstore!

Jr.: Awesome! Super-antique! I should have brought Gaignun!

Shion: I knew it.

chaos: You knew what?

Shion: Brother! What is this? I thought you were going to start working as a
doctor!

Jin: What's wrong with you? When you return to your home, shouldn't you first
say something like, "I'm back"?

Shion: Yes, if it's a *normal* home! What happened? Don't tell me you got bored
and changed jobs again. It hasn't even been half a year!

Jin: being a doctor did not suit me very well. The main task was being a
conversational partner for the neighborhood's old folks; mental care. The
medicine and nanomachines cure everything other than mental illnesses, so that's
all that's left to do. Even without making the investment to become a doctor, I
can still have conversations. But I thought, if I had something to sell, I might
be able to gain a bit from it.

Shion: What do you mean, gain from it? Didn't you just decide to try making a
profit on a hobby you already had? You never made much of an investment into
becoming a doctor anyway. Most of all, what about this mountain of books? Isn't
this even more of an investment? Where did you get all of these books anyway?

Jin: Half of them were stored away in our grandfather's cellar. You've seen them
before, when you were younger. The other half are from customers. Lots of very
distinguished people come here. I have no lack of sources. But, more
importantly, our guests...

Shion: Oh, right! I was so wrapped up in how different this place looks that I
forgot... Jr.! chaos! Please, come on in-- Uh, what are you doing?

Jr. (with tall stacks of books): Oh, uh, I was just thinking of buying these...

chaos: Oh, thank you for having us...

Jr.: But-- These books!

chaos: You can buy all the books you want later, come on.

------------------------------------

 

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4 September 2005 00:01 EDT | Posted by games6/shiseiten

I have just start translating the Japanese Script for you people. Since you all requested it some time ago so I'm sorry to put it up late! It’s not complete yet. But it’s very similar to the NA version. Just think of the NA version more child friendly ^-~

Allen: Ahhh, I can’t believe we’re alive!

Jr.: Yeah, no kidding. I thought we were in for it for sure…

Allen: I’m telling you, the array of stuff the chief pulls always keeps me on edge.

Shion: What are you saying? You make it sound like..I did it!

Allen: Gomen, I did not mean that! KOS-MOS!
You saved our lives, thanks!

KOS-MOS: I am happy to be of service to all of you.

Jr.: Oi, me, pops and the two kids are going to the government office now. What are up to doing, Shion?

Shion: Hmm. Well, we need to hand over KOS-MOS. I think I’ll go to second division, ai KOS-MOS?

KOS-MOS: Acknowledged. That will not be a problem.

Jr.: Mmmhmm. You do have to do that job, yeah? You still going to be hanging here? We can go somewhere later if you would like.

Shion: That’d be great! I’ll show you around this place,
MOMO.

MOMO: Thank you, Shion-san. MOMO's looking forward to it!

Shion: All right. Let’s go KOS-MOS.

KOS-MOS: (to Jr., MOMO, Ziggy and chaos) Please excuse us. Good-bye.

Shion and KOS-MOS left the scene.

Allen: What the? Hey, Chief! Wait up!

Allen left the scene and catches up with Shion and KOS-MOS.

Jr.: Heh. I guess we better get going, yeah?

Ziggy: Sorry…could you wait just a little while? I’m going to report
what’s happened to the Subcommittee. (to MOMO) It appears that Dr.
Mizrahi has also arrived at Miltia, as well. If you have a message for
her.

MOMO: Really? Mommy?

Ziggy: Yes.

MOMO: Please let her know that I’m looking forward to seeing her.

Ziggy: Got it. I’ll pass it along.

Later, Ziggy uses a U.M.N. terminal and contacts Juli Mizrahi.

Juli: All right. Continue your assignment until the delivery is
complete.

Ziggy: Acknowledged.

There was a brief pause.

Ziggy: Dr. Mizrahi.

Juli: Yes, Jan Sauer. Is there something else?

There was another brief pause.

Ziggy: I am currently Ziggurat 8 for the moment.

Juli: So it appears.

Ziggy: MOMO…is looking forward to seeing you.

Juli: I see. I… I, too, welcome your arrival.

The communication ended. Ziggy closes his eyes for a brief moment and
then opens them.

Ziggy: "Eavesdropping is a hobby I never had much interest in."

Jr. proposes that Ziggy get his body upgraded to a carbon frame, installed by
specialist realiens.

Ziggy: "I don't see any need to extend my life span any longer."

Jr.: "MOMO would be happy to see you live longer."

Ziggy: "No, I'll pass. I don't intend to live long."

Jr.: "All right... Let me know if you ever change your mind."

__1.2.6: A Peaceful Drive__

(Ziggy walks down to the car where the others are waiting.)

MOMO: Ziggy: What did Mama say?

Ziggy: Oh, yes. She seemed very busy.

MOMO: Oh, I figured...

Ziggy: She seems to support the subcommittee very much. It must be a very
demanding job.

MOMO: I suppose so. MOMO has to work hard to help her!


As they are driving along the highway, two huge freaking robots fly up out of
nowhere and start attacking them.

MOMO: Aiiieeeee

Jr.: The hell!?

Ziggy: Jr. who are they?

Jr.: Albedo? No, it’s placid for him.

Chaos: eh!

Jr.: Damn, it’s no good on auto, somebody drive it!

MOMO: MOMO wants to!

MOMO crawls under Jr. to get to the front seat.

Jr.: Eh!? Hey, kid!

MOMO: MOMO will do it!

Jr.: Eh…

MOMO: Jr.-san!?

Jr.: 2089! Speed it up!


Jr. shoots them with his pistols and MOMO
takes over the controls of the car, heading for a location specified by Jr.
They are chased by the robots a bit longer until chaos tosses a fire
extinguisher, Jr. shoots it, and they escape down a big flight of stairs. Jr.
has taken them to the fully automated area of town so as to minimize
involvement of civilians. What a guy.

__1.2.7: Backup__

Jr.(telepathically): Gaignun! We're headed to 2089! Tell Helmar we need some
backup! (Gaignun is in some sort of unconscious state at his desk) Hey!
Nii-san!!

Gaignun: Sorry. What's the situation?

Jr.: 2089!

Gaignun: Got it... (to himself) What the hell. What was I doing just now?

Helmar(on phone): Understood. Backup is on its way. It's headed for the
rendezvous point. (hangs up) So, now even out in the open is not safe anymore?

(After a while, Jr. and the others are found by the two huge robots.)

Richalt: It's been a while! You look well! You remember me, don't you? Richalt
is my name. You should remember it, before you die.

Jr.: I hope you burn in hell!

Afterwards, another huge robot with some
sort of big claw appears.)

Pellegry: Both of you, out of the way! I'll take care of the rest! (Her big
claw divides into what look like Aerods, which fire at the group.) Any further
resistance is pointless. Quietly hand over the 100-Type!

(The Aerod-looking things are blown up, and E.S. Asher appears.)

Jr.: That vehicle! Canaan!?

Canaan: Rubedo! Get down!

. Jr. scolds
Canaan for calling him Rubedo,

Jr.: Oi! You could have came sooner, yeah!?

Canaan: Further enemy pursuit is not the matter. I must head back, see you later, Rubedo.

Jr.: Oi oi! No one calls me Rubedo, hear me?

Canaan: I can’t rid of that image of you.

(Jr.
thinks back to 14 years ago.)

Rubedo: Someone! Someone! Help us! It doesn't stop! Nigredo's blood won't stop!

Nigredo: It's all right, Rubedo. No more.

Rubedo: Stupid! You can't give up!

(A light shines on them)

Canaan: U.R.T.V., two units found. Confirmed.

chaos: A red horse brings war. A black horse, famine. In their small shape,
they carry such great strife.

Canaan: The voice channel is noisy; I couldn't hear you. What is it, chaos?

chaos: Nothing. Let's save them.

Jr.: Me. It's my fault. Even though I'm the leader, I broke the ring. That's
why Albedo...

Canaan: Albedo?

Jr.: He's... A fragment of me. The beating in my chest.

Canaan: I got a result. Albedo-- Unit number 667. Conjoined to Unit 666 in the womb. They are imperfect separation can
occur.

chaos: The white horse's rider was polluted, as well... We'll bring peace to
your wounds and your spirits. Even if it's just a moment's rest...

(Back in Second Miltia)

Jr.: I guess you could say I owe those two my life.

MOMO: You've known chaos for a long time too... Um, would it be all right for
me to call you Rubedo? It's a very nice name!

Jr.: Uh... Sorry, that's...

MOMO: MOMO’s sorry...

Jr.: Uh, no, it's just, not a name that brings back good memories.

MOMO: Jr. and Ziggy both dislike your real names.

Jr.: It's because names have good or bad memories associated with them. Pops
over there probably has all sorts of burdens on him. But that's all right. Pops
seems to like the name "Ziggy".

MOMO: Then I'm happy!

Jr.: Even if it does make him sound like a low level mutt!

__1.2.8: Second Branch__

(At Vector Industries 2nd Development Branch)

Shion: Project Zohar?

Guy: Yes. Its spread is evident by the acceleration of the Gnosis phenomenon.
It has been predicted that in the worst-case scenario, within several years the
entire human race could be ruined by Gnosis. Already, more than 120 solar
systems have been annihilated. Even without its having been made public, this
truth is bearing down upon us.

Shion: I understand the situation. But, what does any of it have to do with
KOS-MOS?

Guy: Come this way.

(They are taken to a room in which some vaguely cool-looking designs are
displayed.)

Allen: This is amazing.

Guy: KOS-MOS Mark Three. Designed to prevail in the absolute worst possible
situation.

Shion: What do you mean, absolute worst situation?

Guy: Project Zohar is a grand strategy to completely wipe out Gnosis from this
universe. For that purpose, we must salvage the Original Zohar stored away
on Miltia. The Original Zohar has, for over half a century, been researched as
the most powerful energy source in this universe. But, the key of the Zohar is
this: the core unit needed to restrain the Zohar is a double-edged sword.

Shion: A double-edged sword?

Guy: This. (He shows a screen.) A phenomenon called U-du. Other than that early
on the core unit goes out of control, the details are completely unknown. It's
because of this that Miltia is the way it is today. What we must not forget is
that Gnosis appeared in unison with this phenomenon.

Allen: Do you mean to say that more Gnosis will appear with it again?

Guy: It can't be determined for sure. But it is a definite possibility.

Shion: So then, in KOS-MOS, you want to install... units on both shoulders-- a
general transference system?

Guy: The flower of First Branch, it could only be Chief Uzuki.

Shion: Don't make fun of me.

Guy: I'm sorry. Also, something created for the archetype version, but which
was refit for the current KOS-MOS. The system's radius is 130 nanometers.

Allen: 130!?

Shion: Can you control something on such a scale?

Guy: Leave it to us and the military research office. That is why we moved KOS
MOS here.

Shion: What if I told you I can't hand her over?

Guy: This is an officially planned government project. A chief who wrote one
piece of software does not have the authority to overrule it.

Shion: I suppose not.

Guy: I can understand that you would be uneasy, considering the circumstances
of KOS-MOS's activation, but it is all right. With the data from KOS-MOS's
previous activity, the main company thinks we can perform it correctly. We
agree. Our preparations are complete.

Shion: I guess I have no choice but to trust you.

Guy: You should. After all, the one who designed this system is Kevin, from the
First Branch.

Shion: I understand. I will deliver KOS-MOS to the Second Development Branch at
14:00. I'll send the documents, so if there's anything you need, contact me.
I'll leave the software delivery to him, so if there is anything you don't
understand...

Guy: Understood. Thank you very much.

(Shion walks out; she starts reminiscing)

Shion: To save people's lives?

Kevin: Yes. You could say that's why she's being born. Her awakening will mean
the future to a lot of people. I can't wait for that day.

Shion: This spaceship is also part of KOS-MOS's equipment, right? A vehicle
that can reach hyperspace even without contact with the U.M.N. Column. This
exists to save people's lives too?

Kevin: Yeah... If you look at it the big picture, I guess it does. I hope it'll
be useful to her some day. It may sound weird to say this, but I believe-- no,
I *want* to believe-- that she's not just a weapon used to destroy, but that
the future she makes will be a better one, with no destruction or slaughter. An
ideal world. (Shion laughs) Ah, I guess I'm pretty weird.

Shion: Oh, no, just... How should I say it... Ah, your eyes just looked so
pure, like a child's... Kevin-sempai.

Kevin: Ah, I was just so happy... When I'm in an official capacity I'll try to
be careful.

Shion: But, I'd like to see her too. KOS-MOS, when she wakes up.


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16 March 2005 00:01 EST | Posted by games6/shiseiten
Xenosaga II Japanese Double Attack Quotes.
I just had to share you all these quotes because for the North American version..they were toned down....alot!!
The Japanese ones are just down right...shall I say cheesy? O_________________O


MOMO & Jr.'s

MOMO: Jr.-san!?

Jr.: It's Payday!!
___________________________

Shion & Jin's

Shion: Don't screw up, Jin!

Jin: Likewise!!

_______________________
Shion & Jin's second attack

Jin: Shion, get ready!

Shion: Yaaaaaah!
___________________

Ziggy & Jr.'s

Jr.: Think they've been giving us too much shit?

Ziggy: Sizzling....?

Jr.: Oooh I love a good roast!!
_____________________________

Shion & Jr.'s

Shion: Feathers, hear our prayers!

Jr.: Oh Shion!

Both: Aaaaahhh!!

_________________

chaos & Shion's

chaos: Shion, grab my hand!

Shion: Got it. Go!!!

___________________________

KOS-MOS & Shion's

Shion: KOS-MOS, Hilbert effect!

KOS-MOS: Commencing...

__________________________

chaos & Jin's

Jin: My savior, let's finish this!

chaos: Aeeeyaaah!!

_____________________

chaos & Jr.'s

Jr.: Tough enough to handle it, kid?

chaos: You know it!

Jr.: That's what I like to hear!

______________________________

MOMO & chaos'

chaos: MOMO....trust me.

MOMO: Yes!

________________________

MOMO & Shion's

Shion: MOMO can you do it?

MOMO: All for it!

________________________

KOS-MOS & chaos'

chaos: Shall I have this dance?

KOS-MOS: Confirmed.


Wow...and just when you thought the american version was too much. I'll translate more later. I know the masses want it. ciao!

 

 


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12 February 2005 00:01 EST | Posted by games6/shiseiten

This last part in the manga takes up all volume one and it’s about Jr. gambling, which is pretty funny if I say. I spend about a month translating it and finding good English equivalents.

I didn’t bother to put down the sound effects….they really didn’t make much less of a sense anyway. I really don’t know why they are there in the first place! :o
Someone made a parody of this once….it was sometime ago though. Anyway, I hope I did a good job with this one.

Title: chaotic nights


Coincidentally, Jr. bumped into KOS-MOS, who was also wandering the halls in search of something.

Jr.: KOS-MOS! Hey you look bored. Why not come to the Gambling Room with me?

KOS-MOS: Gambling is highly irrelevant to my mission and is extremely inappropriate for an android such as myself. Also, the games are rigged and would be a waste of my time and money.

Jr.: This is MY ship and my games are CERTAINLY not rigged. At least come and watch me win my victories.

KOS-MOS: I was currently in the middle of accomplishing Shion's orders."

Jr.: Forget her. She's just 'all work and no play'. That's why you're so hardcore. She never lets you have any fun."

KOS-MOS: I am also telling you this for your own good. According to my calculations, the probability of you winning a single card game is a 00.002% chance."

Jr.: KOS-MOS I think you're malfunctioning. I'm the coolest person on the Durandal. I CAN'T lose. Now come on! We've already wasted five minutes of gambling time!
-------------------------------------
Later...

Jr.: OUTRAGEOUS! WHAT DO YOU MEAN THAT I CAN'T GAMBLE HERE!?

Dealer: Well, Little Master, it's not the fact that you can’t gamble here, it's the fact that you aren't old enough to.

Jr.: What are you talking about!? I’m twenty-nine years old and this my ship thank you very much!!

Dealer: Little Master you obviously don't look twenty-nine. And even if you were, do you have an ID present?"

Jr.: Huh? *looks in pockets* Where did it go!?

Falshback----------------------: Elsa:

Tony: I took Little Master’s ID!
Hammer: Free beer for us!


Present -------------

Dealer: I rest my case.

Jr.: INSIGNIFICANCE! SAYS WHO THAT I CAN'T GAMBLE HERE!?

Dealer: It's the law, sir.

Jr.: Well then, I'll just have to report this to the Administration Committee, now won't I?

Dealer: Sure, sir.


Jr.: *squints* Hey, didn't I see your name on the Mary and Shelly Fan Club list?

Dealer: I admire Mary and Shelly very so much…

Jr.: Good… CAUSE NOW YOU'RE OFF OF IT!"

Dealer: W-What?
Sfx:sobsob

Jr.: That's right, I hereby declare you off from the list.

KOS-MOS: This man is only obeying his orders. You, on the other hand, are clearly attempting to deny the rights of his enjoyments. Surely…

Jr.: Shut up you stupid android! Just what would you know about gambling, laws and order and marketing!?

KOS-MOS: Well, due to the absence of two of those ideals, I—

Jr.: Shut up! And you dealer, will pay for this. Dearly.

-------------------------------------
10 minute later

Jr.: This is much more like it! For my first game, I would like to play poker.

Dealer: Right, do you have a pre-made deck?

Jr.: As a matter of fact I do! It’s called ‘The Best Deck In The Entire World Because It Features Gaignun Jr. (That’s Me) on all of The Cards.


Dealer: Right…In that case I will be playing with my Supreme Nemesis Deck.

Jr.: I’m not scared of you!

KOS-MOS: it seems to me that your cockiness will prove to be your adversary. Are you confirming your decision wisely?

Jr.: Be quiet! Just LOOK at MY deck!
Sfx:fanfanfanfan

KOS-MOS: That deck shows your conceitedness.

Jr.: I am not conceited! I am a winner! Now I begin!

Dealer: Y-Yes, sir…

Jr.: It's good to be King…

-----------------------------------------------
20 minute later

Jr.: Hahaha Another win! Next victim!

Man: So, you're the Little Master who has won 34 games straight in a row?

Jr.: Yeah, What's it to you?

Man: I'm here to challenge you.

Jr.: Bring it on fat boy. *Does the 'come on' sign.*

Man: You're going to regret those words, pansy.

Jr.: PANSY!? DID YOU JUST CALL ME PANSY!?

Man: Yeah I did.

Jr.: Good, Just thought that I didn't hear you correctly.

*On the other side of the room, KOS-MOS was trying her luck at slots.*

KOS-MOS: If I wait approximately 0.603 seconds, then my chances of winning 75 million gold will be pushed up to 99.999%.

Machine: Congratulations! You've just won 75 million gold!
-------------------------------------------
40 minute later

Jr.: I can't believe I'm losing! I can't believe I'm losing to …a Skull Card. Are you sure that these 'special' cards you have are legal in the tournament?

Man: Of course! *puts down a cheap drawn skull card* Now this is an instant death to all cards.
Sfx: It’s great to cheat!


Jr.: I won't accept defeat. Another match! I'll bet I can beat you this time!

Man: What's the bet?

Jr.: I'll bet my EXCLUSIVE guns here!

*KOS-MOS passed by*

KOS-MOS: Gaignun Kukai Jr… are you sure…

Jr.: YES I'M SURE! NOW GO AWAY!

*KOS-MOS shrugs and exits the Gambling Room.*

Jr.: Begin!

--------------------------------------
50 minute later

Man: Well, I must thank you for your parting with these guns here…

Jr.: No! How could I lose!? This is MY gambling table!
Sfx:slamslam

Man: It was a pleasure doing business with you…

Jr.: Wait! *tosses coat on table* I'll bet this!

Man: Suit yourself. It's your funeral.

Jr.: I won't lose THIS time!

--------------------------------------

*MOMO walked past the room*
Sfx:shuffleshuffle

Jr.: I lost again!?


Jr.: It's not fair!

Man: Hey, thanks for the coat, but you don't have anything left to gamble with. Besides, you've been playing all night. Don't you think that it's time for you to stop?

Jr.: NEVER! I WILL find something else to bet against!

MOMO: What are you doing?

Jr.: Come here, MOMO,
Sfx: grabgrab jerk
Jr.: I will bet you this bracelet that I can win the next match!"

Man: Hey, I ain't betting for pretty stuff.

Jr.: No way. This is a SILVER bullet. Made completely from…SILVER."

MOMO: But you gave it to me!!!

Jr.: Quiet, kid! I'll get you another one! My reputation is on the line.

*MOMO ran off, crying.*

Man: That was pretty dirty…

Jr.: Shut up! Are you here to play, or are you here to play?

Man: I guess I'm here to play.

Jr.: Good! Now shuffle the cards.

---------------------------------
70 minute later

Man: Geez. You don't have anything left to gamble with. You've been playing at this table since yesterday. Don't you think that it's time for you to quit?

*KOS-MOS appears once again*

KOS-MOS: I find it quite odd that a life form such as yourself would still be wasting your time in a room such as this.

Jr.: And just what are you doing here, KOS-MOS?

KOS-MOS: I never said that android could not participate in your human sports. On the contrary, I seem to be faring much better than you anyhow.

Jr.: Ha! I have double that amount in my savings account!

Man: Oh? Really?

KOS-MOS: I have overheard what you have done to MOMO. And to tell you the truth, I find that quite inappropriate. Surely it would be in your best interest to cease gambling and go apologize.

Jr.: Bah I will tomorrow All right, new match!

Man: Hmm…about those saving accounts of yours…

Jr.: Certainly! I have credit cards as well.
Sfx:throwthrow

Jr.: And the documents to my savings accounts will be mailed to you…..have I the misfortune of losing.

-------------------------------------------
90 minute later

Man: You know what? I'm personally sick and tired of beating you. And I never thought I'd say that.

Jr.: NO!I may have lost everything but there's just one thing that I have left.

Man: Oh really?

Jr.: You see this ship we're flying on?

Sfx: (Uh-oh…)

Man: Yeah. What about it?

Jr.: It belongs to ME.

Man: YOU!? Ow the Durandal!?"

Jr.: Well then I guess you don't want it.
Sfx: gather gather

Man: You're serious?

Jr.: Of course I'm serious you idiot. How dare you call Gaignun Jr. a LIAR! I should have you persecuted with your arms severed by cannibals all over the universe with––

Man: All right, Just pick up those cards of yours that you just threw all over me and we'll play.

Jr.: I bet my ship and the ownership of it against your cards.

Man: We'll see about that.

Jr.: I sneer at your cards!

-----------------------------
5 minute later

Jr.: NO! I LOST MY RIGHTS TO THE DURANDAL!

Man: Much obliged, And so that I won't smear my winning streak, I'm going to start working on my prize. First off, I'm going to turn the Durandal into an amusement park!"

Jr.: What!?

Man: Of course! But first I need to learn to fly this thing!

Jr.: You are not touching my ship!

Man: Ah ah but it is mine now.

Jr.: tch!

Everyone aboard: AAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!
---------------------------------------------

Title: (Original Japanese): Menbaa Hoshuuchuu
Title (English):

In progress.


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Title: (Original Japanese): Omoshikomi wa Kochira made
Title (English):

In progress.


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Title: (Original Japanese): Mekara Biimu
Title (English):

In progress.


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Title: (Original Japanese): Chotto Niteta
Title (English):

In progress.


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Title: (Original Japanese): Mune wo Kakusuimi wo Oshiete Kudasai
Title (English):

In progress.


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Title: (Original Japanese): Mizugi Chikku Kikan
Title (English):

In progress.

 

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10 February 2005 00:01 EST | Posted by games6/shiseiten

From the Official Xenosaga Episode II Anthology by BC Collection. (Published by Mag Garden)

Note:
- I've tried to translate the sound effects (sfx) as much as possible, but for those where I could not really find an English equivalent, I've kept in it's original form.


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Title (English): Swimsuit Equinox (?)

Jr.: Sea ------! Summer ------!
Swimsuits --------!

Jin: Oh my, it's great to be young, isn't it...
By the way, I'm in my swimsuit too ^___-

Shion: Wait, Nii-san!?
Isn't this a "loincloth"!!
A loinclothisn't a swimsuit, isn't in underwear!?

Jin: How rude, Shion. This red loincloth is waterproof.
It's a perfectly legitimate swimsuit.
An underwear-type loincloth is over here...

Shion: How embarrassing ----- !
I understand!! I understand already.
Stop waving it around ------ !!


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Title (English): Minitskirt!

Jr.: Shion... you changed outfits...
Momo: Yes!
Uh... Um ----
It doesn't suit me?
sfx: fidget fidget

Jr.: sfx: Thadump
Ah!! I didn't mean that!!
Jr: (Thinking) It's just that...
Nice miniskirt!
I won't get to see that appearance again...
That nostalgic heat-pounding feeling...

Jin: You won't get to see it anymore?
Then, let me give you the heartpounding <3 thrill!

sfx: chira chira chira
paparapa (1) -----

Jr.: How about we abandon that freak out into space.
Shion: Yeah.

sfx:Sound of trumpets going off


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Title (English): A Whole New World (?) (1)

Currently not translated.

Summary: Jr. and gang come across a ladder and Shion says that there's no way they can proceed ahead unless they climb up the ladder. She then tells all the guys to go up the ladder first, since if the girls go up first the guys will be able to peek under their skirts. (Though honestly, I don't know why she bothers to do this, since in Episode II none of the girls wear skirts anymore. Maybe she just doesn't want the guys looking at the girl's butts?)

The guys go up in the order: Ziggy, Jin and Junior. (Dunno where chaos is) As Jin is climbing up, his kimono flaps open and Jr. who's below him is treated to a rather, er, ungainly sight. :p Jr. is so traumatised that he passes out and falls down the ladder. (Hence the title - it refers to the fact that poor Jr. has been introduced to a new world of something he could never have imagined before.)

(1) Not quite sure how to translate this. I think it means something along the lines of being exposed to something that a person has never seen before, such that it's impact is to make it seem as if a whole new world has opened up to that person. (Eek, hope that made sense)


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Title (English): My First Impression

Shion: KOS-MOS!
sfx: pata pata (1)
Shion: That appearance... Is your tuning finished?
KOS-MOS: Yes.
Shion: sfx: stare ------ ...
Shion: So solid ---- !! (?)
KOS-MOS: Is that all you want to say? Shion.

(1) Sound of footsteps

(Did anyone manage to get this joke? Care to explain it to me?)


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Title (English): Smiling Chaos

chaos: Taa!
Yaa!
sfx: smile smile
sfx: Bam
Wham
chaos: Sorry!
sfx: smile smile
sfx: Thwap
chaos: sfx: smile
It's great that that fight was over so fast, wasn't it?

Jr.: Please stop smiling in the midst of battle...
sfx: shiver shiver shiver

Everyone: *behind Jr.* sfx: Eeeeeeek
sfx: shiver
chaos: Why? sfx: wipe wipe It's good to smile.

Battle cries

Jr.: Who left me with these people!?


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Title (English): 00Ziggy

Jin: Ziggy-san is really cool ----

Ziggy: Is that so?

Jin: I want to be something like a cyborg too.

Ziggy: There's nothing that great about it...

Arrow: Japanese sword
sfx: clank
clank
Arrow: Fundoshi
sfx: bika ----- (1)
clank
Arrow: Japanese sword

Imaginary Shion: Nii-san's so amazing!

Jin: How great... Cyborgs.
sfx: dreamy

Ziggy: What!?
What was that vision just now!?

Sound of beams being emitted


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Title (English): 00MOMO

MOMO: Ziggy's really cool ----

Ziggy: Is that so?

MOMO: MOMO wants to be as strong as Ziggy -----

Ziggy: ... You're fine just the way you are now...

Arrow: Albedo
sfx: Splurt
Imaginary Albedo: Peche ----
Arrow: Jr.
Imaginary Jr.: MOMO!!
Arrow: Breast missiles
sfx: bika
roar
boom
Side text: Full height 14m

MOMO: Ufufufufu

Ziggy: MOMO ----- !!!

Laughing


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Title (English): Shion is

Shion: chaos was in the bathroom...

Jr.: Yeah I arranged so you could see your lover.

Shion: chaos is not my lover!

Jr.: You know, Maybe we can arrange a cabin switch on the Elsa. I’m sure MOMO won’t mind being alone, and chaos’s room is soundproof anyway, so–

Shion: Shutup!

 

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Title (English): Shion is 2

Shion: I have so much work to do!

Jr.: I'm sure chaos can help with th-

Shion: Unless you want Jin to stay in your room, you will not finish that sentence!

Jr.:......


Posted by games6/shiseiten at 8:37 PM EDT
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Saturday, 28 February 2004


ALBEDO: Well, just play along! I got a bet riding on you, too! I'll show Voyager up yet! Then Ziggy will owe me.

**ALBEDO picks up his clothes and leaves.

CHAOS: What was that al... nevermind. Nephilim will tell me later.

MIYUKI: Nephilim?

CHAOS: Oops. [wiggles fingers in MIYUKI's direction] You never heard that.

MIYUKI: [blank] Heard what?

CHAOS: [kisses her on the cheek] That's my girl.

JR: [scoff] Women's Tao?

CHAOS: What rubbish is that? (?)

GAIGNUN: Good rubbish. It worked on Shion.

**JUNIOR and SHION laugh. Although SHION does this nervously.

GAIGNUN: [nervous] Well... did it? Tell me.

SHION: Er. Only girls can do it.

JR: I said no take-backs.

SHION: [angered] Take-back this!

**SHION picks up and throws a coffee mug in JUNIOR's direction. Just at that moment, WILHELM entered the kitchen and catches it with one hand.

WILHELM: [scolding] Shion! I'm dissapointed in you. It's bad enough we had coffee swiped out of our hands, and a naked man serving it.

JR: [defiant] I saved your life!

SHION: B-boss! It's not what it looks like.

WILHELM: Oh? It sure looked like you were chugging mugs at your man. One of them, anyway.

SHION/JUNIOR: [stunned] My man? My man?!

WILHELM: I know. It surprised me, too. I guess his fanbase wasn't too far off. [to ALLEN] Allen. You shouldn't be with this girl. Oh, and neither should you, Miyuki.

MIYUKI: But I'm not-

MOMO: We heard everything.

MARY: Junior! How could you?!

JR: Quiet, you're not my wife.

MARY: She isn't either! ...And you're pregnant?!

JR: [scream] Oh my god!

WILHELM: Mary, don't be silly. It's the other way around. Junior may have got something from her, though. Like a cold.

SHION: [reflex] From Allen!

ALLEN: What?!

WILHELM: Your fault.

MARY: Ha, ha! [ponts to JUNIOR] You all caught the stupid from Allen!

JR: Oh, yeah? Well, you're gonna get it from me if I have a say in it.

**MARY's dumbfounded. She runs.

JR: Yeah, I'm gonna get you!

WILHELM: I hope you don't take habit to harassing your employees.

JR: At least I don't kill them.

MARY (V.O.): I'd rather die!

ALBEDO (V.O.): That could be arranged. Hahaha!!

SHION: All I did was go to Junior's to eat cherry vanilla mochi!

ALLEN: [screaming] Code! It's code!!

WILHELM: Cherry vanilla! We aren’t that stupid! We're all adults here. We know what that means!

MOMO: Why the cherry, though? [suspicious] Am I involved, somehow?

WILHELM: You forget. You're a peach. Momo means peach.

MOMO: [sheepish] Oh... I forget. My sister, you know. Her name was Sakura.

[Silence]

SHION: But, but, but but... [meekly] it's my favorite.

JR: I can vouch. She eats it whenever she's sad.

ALLEN: Well, you must have depressed her.

MIYUKI: [giggling] Yeah, Junior. You're no Albedo.

JR: Shut up damn it!

GAIGNUN: This is all a big misunderstanding, Sir.

WILHELM: I don't care to hear it. We all had enough for the night.

**SHION's house begins to empty.

WILHELM: Well, assuming that you're feeling well, I'll see all three of you in the morning.

MIYUKI: Yea... bye.

**WILHELM exits, followed by MIYUKI, MOMO, ALLEN, and eventually CHAOS. He leaves with an apologizing shrug.

SHION: This just didn't happen to me.

GAIGNUN: It did.

SHION: I need some mochi.

**WILHELM returns.

WILHELM: Can you at least wait til I leave? I'm taking this mug of coffee on the table, here. I'm going need it.

**WILHELM exits again, taking a long swig of the coffee.

GAIGNUN: I need some mochi, too...

**ALBEDO returns, fully clothed.

ALBEDO: I'm off the phone now. Wow, the coffee was sure a hit. It's all gone.

SHION: If there's any luck for me, boss'll be dead by morning.

ALBEDO: Silly woman. Cow milk doesn't kill. Hahahaha

JR: You're calling yourself a cow, now?!

ALBEDO: According to the magazines, I am. Sad society. Look how anorexic I'm looking. And they call it fat. Sad world, I'm telling you. [claps hands together] Why all the sad faces?! I got money to roll in. You mentioned mochi. You ladies need some mochi. I'll buy. It's all on me. Shion just made me rich, it's the least I can do. Hehehehe

GAIGNUN: I'm not depressed.

ALBEDO: Sure you are.

SHION: I already have three boxes! What you can do is kill Allen.

ALBEDO: You mad, woman?! I wouldn't get near that emotional thing. Killing him would be mercy. I don't do mercy. You already know this. Besides, three boxes isn't going to help you. You need a bucket… a bucket of ice cream! Now let's go.

**Reluctantly, everyone follows ALBEDO out the door.

 


[ELSA DINER AND COFFEE HOUSE- table -NIGHT]

KOS-MOS: There's a 85% chance you're joking, Albedo.

ALBEDO: Joking not! Three of those buckets of ice cream there. We're depressed!

GAIGNUN: I'm not depressed.

ALBEDO: Yea, you're just emotional. Get a sweater to cry on. Hahaha! Oh, and a kiddie box for Rubedo here. Hahahaha!

JR: Gimme a bucket damn it!

KOS-MOS: Albedo, I will allow the purchase of three buckets of ice cream. However, because of your build I doubt you can consume a bucket of ice cream, Gaignun Kukai Junior.

JR: You'd be surprised.

KOS-MOS: I am not taking that chance. There's a 75% risk. I could have a lawsuit on my hands. I am sorry. [to Albedo] By your manner, I assume money is no objection?

ALBEDO: [grinning] Nope. Lay it on me!

GAIGNUN: Not literally.

KOS-MOS: I understand he's not to be taken literally, Gaignun Kukai. I will be right back. Which flavors would you prefer?

ALBEDO: Uh, coffee.

GAIGNUN: Vanilla.

JR: Bubble gum sherbet.

ALBEDO: How childish!

JR: Shut up!

SHION: ...Cherry vanilla.

KOS-MOS: I will be right back. [leaves]

JR: After all that, you'd still eat cherry vanilla flavoured anything?!

SHION: I can't help it! It's my favorite!

ALBEDO: Whoo boy. I suggest you get a new favorite. When people hear those two words in the same sentence... [makes a pow sound] misunderstanding.

GAIGNUN: There's too much slang out there. Anything can mean anything.

ALL: Hear, hear.

JR.: Like, bang. It used to be the sound for a gun.

SHION: Or 69…..

ALBEDO: No, that's a pretty old one. Since the sixties, at least. Or the Cesear. I think he coined it or something. (?)

SHION: [frusterated] I wouldn't know!

ALBEDO: If your choice of ice cream is any indication, you shouldn't.

**SHION growls. KOS-MOS returns with three buckets balanced on one arm, and a small box for JUNIOR. She passes them out, and goes back to work. Everyone begins to dig in. Especially Albedo. Literally. With his hands.

JR: Damn! I wanted a bucket!! Albedo, I demand you give me some of yours.

GAIGNUN: [to JUNIOR] Coffee flavor. You sure of that?

ALBEDO: No, Rube. Grow a few inches, and hair on your chin. Which is never! Hahaha! And as for you, Nigredo, stick your hands in your ice cream. It's the only way to enjoy it.

GAIGNUN: I knew you've been talking to him, Junior. No!

JR: Shut up! You forget who's older than you by a mere 10 seconds!

ALBEDO: As long as you look like that, who cares?

JR.: GOD DAMMIT!

SHION: [muffled] Will all of you shut up… please?

**Everyone turns to see that SHION has stuck her entire head in the bucket.

JR: You're gonna die! Suffocate! Get out of there!

SHION: [muffled] No. [chewing sounds] I don't care.

ALBEDO: What are you doing! The night is young! You can't die yet!

GAIGNUN: Yet?!

ALBEDO: She can die after I buy her a gold-lined noose. Or at least a new oven to stick her head in. I'd be ashamed to put my head in that thing. Or food.

JR: Albedo, you're insane. And it's three in the morning.

SHION: [muffled] For crying out loud, it's night! It's dark out! [chewing sounds] Dark as my soul!

JR: [raps SHION's bucket with a spoon] Come out of your bucket and say that.

GAIGNUN: You're still arguing about that?! Maybe you should marry. Seriously…

**SHION says nothing. JR pouts. KOS-MOS passes over the table.

KOS-MOS: Shion Uzuki, is something the matter?

ALBEDO: You have to excuse her. That time of the month. You know how the chant goes.

KOS-MOS: [squints at SHION] You are correct. It is best to leave her alone.

ALBEDO: Check that! Lucky guess. Women's Tao, works

SHION: Aiiyaaa!

ALBEDO: Come out of that bucket and say that!

KOS-MOS: But that isn't the only reason.

JR: What, you double as an observational Realian?

KOS-MOS: I am equipped with observational technologies usually reserved for the 100-Series, yes.

ALBEDO: Oh, nothing big. She slept with Allen. Rubedo, too.

JR: Did not!

ALBEDO: And I'd like to see how many people believe it. I have another bet going on. Kevin's house is mine! Anyway. You should be with MOMO, anyway. Jailbait should date jailbait.

**JUNIOR throws his box of ice cream at ALBEDO, who catches it.

ALBEDO: [laugh] More for me, sucker. Thanks. Hahahaha

JR: I hope your head gets blown off from it!

ALBEDO: Trivial. It'll just grow back, stupid. Hahahaha!

KOS-MOS: My emotional response is to vomit in the lavatory. Please excuse me. [leaves]

SHION: [muffled] Why did I ever program that?

ALBEDO: Because you're stupid? Oh, Rubedo dear, catch.

**Without warning, the coffeepot KOS-MOS left behind is thrown at JUNIOR. He doesn't catch it, and it spills all over him.

JR: Damn it, Albedo!

ALBEDO: [disapproving] That's also why I could beat Nigredo. Both of you are too slow. Shion's the only fast one here. Sad.

SHION: [muffled] I can still hear you! (?)

ALBEDO: [ignoring her] Yes, that really isn't good for you. Lay off the salmon. Fattening junk.

The end
[KOS-MOS appears one the last page as a "soup nazi"]

KOS-MOS: ROAR. [throws a spoon] NO SOUP FOR YOU.


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23 September 2005 00:01 EDT | Posted by games6/shiseiten

Jin: And, you say you want to help them?

Shion: Yeah.

Jin: I can't understand that. Isn’t Little Master a professional in that field? It's not
something that an amateur should stick her nose into.

Shion: An amateur? I've been quite helpful to him! Right?

Jin: Well, anyway, rest up today and tomorrow we can go visit Father and
Mother's graves.

Shion: Brother, wait! That again? How many times have I told you I'm not going
there? I hate it. I never want to go.

Jin: Even if you say that, it's your duty as a child to at least put one flower
before your parents' graves...

Shion: Stop it! And what do you mean, "before their graves". Father and Mother
aren't even in that cemetery! You know where the two of them are, don't you?
Yes, the only ones there then were me and you! If you... If you had only come a
little earlier!! Father and Mother would...! ...I'm sorry. I didn't mean to...
I... (gets up) But, I still don't want to go to the cemetery... (walks out)

(The rest of them walk into another room)

Jr.: W-well, I'd better get going... It's about time there...

Jin: I am sorry for showing you something so embarrassing.

Jr.: Oh, don't be... Is it all right?

Jin: Do not worry. We are brother and sister of the same blood.

chaos: Sorry, would you mind if I stayed? Of course, only if you would not mind.

Jin: I don't mind at all. Please stay over. Shion will surely be pleased as
well.

Jr.: All right. Don't worry about us. MOMO's analysis is tomorrow, so just come
back in time for that.

chaos: All right. Thanks.

(Jr. leaves; next scene is Jin outside at night)

chaos: You're out here?

Jin: It's a nice voice, isn't it? Whenever I can't sleep, here always relaxes
me.

chaos: Is it about Shion?

Jin: Yes. Well, it's been two years... I still thought she was a kid, for some
reason. I think she gets that personality from her grandfather.

(A moth burns itself on the candle)

Jin: So, what did you want to ask? You're here because you want to talk, yes?

chaos: Well, Jin... I was wondering if you... The U-TIC Foundation...

Jin: It's about that incident, is it... 14 years... It was so long ago, but it
seems like something we did yesterday. Anyway it seems to be a spell from which
I cannot escape. Did I bring it upon myself? The hunter-gatherers of mankind who
started that history, soon they discovered how to manipulate fire. From there
they took up blades. A consciousness reaching toward the future, with time, is
also changing it. When they started making offerings to gods, those people acted
having forgoten the existence of their origins. If you think about it, we humans
may be fluttering into the candlelight, just like moths [actually leaf-beetles],
without knowing the end waiting for us there. (blocks the moth from the candle
and it flies away)

chaos: Jin...

Jin: I'm sorry to have bothered you with all of this. She's an awkward little
sister, but please continue to take care of her for me.

chaos: It's not...

Jin: I could not be by her side for that "most painful time". And now, I still
cannot be close for her. I must be scared. If I try to be any closer to her, she
may not accept me as her own family, as her own brother. I am afraid of that.

chaos: Shion mentions your name in any context. I think that means she cares for
you. That's what I think it means.

Jin: ...And then, she suffixes it with, "my worthless brother", right?

chaos: Well, sometimes...

Jin: But, it's strange... I feel like I can talk to you about anything. Like
you're much more mature than I, like you've lived hundreds of years. That's the
feeling I get from you.

chaos: Nah, it's just my relaxed nature. That's why Jr.'s always saying to me,
"You're slow, idiot!" (They laugh.)

(Morning at the Uzukis')

Shion: Sorry to keep you waiting!

chaos: You have a very different atmosphere when you're out of uniform.

Shion: Really? Do I look weird?

chaos: Not at all. It looks good on you.

Shion: Thanks.

chaos: Is it all right to leave without saying anything to your brother?

Shion: It's okay. Because of what happened yesterday, I wouldn't even know what
to say if I saw him. Anyway, I'm sorry that I can't come with you to MOMO's
analysis. I'm pretty busy too; I can't just leave Allen on his own, and I'm
worried about KOS-MOS.

chaos: It's all right, there's no need to worry. The analysis itself won't be
that difficult, and everyone from the Foundation will be helping.

Shion: Tell MOMO to do her best for me.

chaos: Okay, I will. See you. (leaves)

__1.2.11: U.M.N. Administrative Center__

Gaignun: (She) should be arriving soon.

Jr.: But, meeting with a specialist member of the subcommittee...

Gaignun: That just shows how important it is. To the subcommittee, and to her.

MOMO: Mama?

Juli Mizrahi: It's been a while.

Gaignun: I'm glad to see you are well.

Mizrahi: I'm very grateful for your efforts in the Proto Merkabah incident.
Allow me to offer my thanks as a representative of the subcommittee as well.

Ziggy: MOMO played a major part as well. Her work was excellent.

Juli: I see. Good work, MOMO.

MOMO (brimming with excitement): Mom!!

Mizrahi (walking past MOMO): I'd like to sort out some materials. If you could
arrange for a room where I can get organized, I'd be thankful.

Jr.: Keh….

Mizrahi: MOMO.

MOMO: Yes!

Mizrahi: Once this business settles down... Wouldn't it be nice to live
together?

(MOMO barely squeaks out a noise of agreement. Mizrahi and Jr. leave.)

Ziggy: That's good.

MOMO: Yes.

Shelley (appearing): Now, MOMO-chan, come this way.

MOMO: Yes!

[some gameplay]

(Jr. approaches Mizrahi as she is working)

Jr.: Ms. Juli... What's going on?

Mizrahi: With what?

Jr.: With you suddenly saying nice things to MOMO, yeah?

Mizrahi: Is it unnatural? Joachim designed that realien to evoke motivation from
familial warmth, correct? If so, then in order for this research to go smoothly,
isn't fulfilling that parameter required as my professional duty?

Jr.: I knew it, it's just for your work. If you keep acting like such a cold
person, you'll end up being the one who gets hurt…you know.

Mizrahi: The one who made that realien was Joachim. I'm scared of it.

Jr.: I don't know what kind of person Joachim Mizrahi was. I don't know what
purpose he had in creating the 100-Type. But, I have a promise with Sakura.

Mizrahi: with Sakura?

Jr.: So I plan to treat her appropriately as the child she appears to be.

Mizrahi: What kind of promise do you have?

Jr.: She said, "protect my mom and my little sister". Ms. Juli, laugh again.
Sakura would have wanted you to.

(chaos walks in, and Mizrahi leaves)

chaos: Was I interrupting something?

Jr.: No, nothing! But, is Shion all right?

chaos: Yeah, I don't think there's any need to worry. That family just seems to
be complicated.

Jr.: Pretty complicated... Well, I guess I can't really say anything about
that.

[gameplay]

(Mizrahi wakes up Ziggy in his chair)

Mizrahi: How are you feeling?

Ziggy: Professor Mizrahi!

Mizrahi: MOMO asked me to come. "Mom, you're a famous scientist, so you should
know a lot about cybernetics, right?"

Ziggy: But... my tuning...

Mizrahi: I'm not a young woman. Don't worry. "Famous scientist"? If you ask me
I'm more "infamous".

Ziggy: You seem uncomfortable with MOMO. Why?

Mizrahi: Can I love a thing that looks like my daughter, but is not my
daughter?

Ziggy: That is a difficult question.

Mizrahi: Even if she looks just like my daughter, her spirit will not return.
100 Types all around the star cluster, looking like that, just keep painfully
reminding me of her death.

Ziggy: The one who made them look that way, was your husband?

Mizrahi: Yes... Do you have any children?

Ziggy: One son. He was a very energetic and intelligent child, but he died in
an accident.

Mizrahi: I'm sorry. Is that the reason you committed suicide?

Ziggy: Yes, it is.

Mizrahi: Perhaps, when my daughter died, I should have done so as well. But the
places that should have held sadness, were filled up by anger at my husband.

Ziggy: Maybe you are just a strong person.

Mizrahi: No, I am just wicked.

Ziggy: Professor Mizrahi. This is my personal opinion, but, is it possible for
you to think that you had two daughters?

Mizrahi: What do you mean?

Ziggy: One has died, and one is still alive.

Mizrahi: Are you telling me to treat MOMO not as just a copy of my daughter, but
as an individual person? You bring up such a difficult subject!

Ziggy: Please consider it.

Mizrahi: I will think about it. I had better be going.

Ziggy: Thank you for the tuning.

Mizrahi (leaving): You are welcome.

Ziggy (trying out his hand-mechanisms): Why don't you come in? I said that
eavesdropping is a bad hobby.

(Jr. and chaos enter)

Jr.: Ah, we didn't intend anything bad by it. But hey pops, I really can't pin
you down!

Ziggy: What do you mean. I don't understand what you are saying.

Jr.: Hmph! You’re brainless!

Ziggy: More importantly, I think it is almost time for MOMO's analysis. People
with responsibilities should not be hanging around here.

Jr.: Shit. We'd better hurry up and get back.

[gameplay]

(In the lab, MOMO is standing in a circle of lights)

Mary: No need to be nervous, MOMO! This is all just preliminary preparations
for the analysis.

MOMO: Yes. I'll do my best. (Ziggy nods to her) MOMO is a self-tuning type, so
MOMO has always performed tuning while in bed. Receiving tuning like this makes
me feel like Ziggy.


Ziggy: It's all right. You don't need to be scared.

100-Type: For the analysis, I will be shutting down your personality
simulation function. Simultaneously, your emotion display function and your
abstract recognition function will be shut down. Please do not worry.

MOMO: [something; kiji?] emotion...

100-Type: Personality simulation is a completely personal option, so it has no
effect on the observational function.

MOMO (thinking): MOMO's heart is... just an optional function?

Ziggy: MOMO...

(Their hands reach out to each other)

100-Type: Personality layer, sleep mode complete. Shutting down function.

MOMO: Ah-- (goes limp)

(Ziggy closes his eyes and Mary keeps typing. Fade out. Fade back in on the
group watching from the next room.)

Helmar: How is she doing?

Mary: MOMO's analysis preparations don't seem to be making much progress. Not
only are there difficult barriers, but because of the hacking that occured,
some routes have been damaged.

Jr.: Hmm... Her personality layer is shut down right now, yeah?

Mary: Yes. I feel like we are doing something terrible; my heart hurts. On Old
Miltia 10 years ago… when we were prescribed medication, I felt empty inside. I hated it.

Jr.: Right… I remember… sorry… I couldn’t…

Mary: It’s alright. I know you tried everything you could. Even we bold, human-like creatures feel that way. If we're told our
heart is something like a lie, I think it'd really hurt us.

Jr.: Our hearts could just be toys created by God. (Makes to leave)

Shelley: Little Master. Is it acceptable for you not to be present?

Jr.: It’s like 10 years ago... I’m going to go lay down. I'm nervous..

Shelley: Little Master.

Jr.: Because I'm a coward...

(Jr. Leaves. Fade out. Fade back in on the procedure continuing.)

100-Type: [Technobabble and countdown]

Mary: Just a little longer, MOMO. The pain will be over soon. When it's over,
let's go play somewhere fun.

100-Type: Final barrier pattern decoded. Releasing all protection.

Mary: MOMO?

MOMO (struggling to speak): ...No!

Mary: MOMO, what is it? Are you trying to say something?

MOMO: This... is... a... trap!

(The 100-Types collapse)

Shelley: This...?

Guy: High levels of interference from an invisible region on the high-speed
channel.

Mizrahi: Defensive logic 68% destroyed. Emergency abort... rejected! Terminal
being opened to the U.M.N. network. Invasion cannot be intercepted!

Guy: Multiple axons being connected in the deep zone! Large-scale holographic
network being reorganized!

Ziggy: Professor Mizrahi. This is--

Mizrahi: Even if we study every system individually, we won't find anything.
The low-resolution bits of every layer-- Like splinters of memory inlaid, all
activate at once, and link all of the images. Joachim set it up this way.
[sourei na something]. Re-execute abort sequence! Reconstruct external hacking
defense logic!

Girl: Yes ma'am! Restarting defense logic! ...It was rejected.

Ziggy: MOMO!

Mary: MOMO!

MOMO: I'm... sorry... MOMO... didn't... notice...

Gaignun: No, this is--!

Mizrahi: An internal trap is present. This is not Joachim's design. It's
newer... This was done while she was captive in that "Tower of the Song".

Gaignun: Albedo's trap!?

Girl: Defense logic will be destroyed in 20 seconds! (Mizrahi takes the seat
from her) All developmental data could be compromised!

Ziggy: Professor Mizrahi. What do you intend to do?

Mizrahi: To use the emergency code and delete the data.

Ziggy: Ridiculous! If you do that, MOMO will--

Mizrahi: I have no choice! If we do not prevent the Y-Data from falling into
enemy hands...

Ziggy: Professor Mizrahi!

Mizrahi (hesitating over the button): MOMO... (She withdraws her hand)

Guy: Professor Mizrahi! The holographic network has begun to self
disintegrate. The developmental data will be deleted!

Mizrahi: What!? I haven't--

Ziggy: What is this?

Mizrahi: MOMO... MOMO herself is rejecting her nervous circuits and dispersing
her memories! To protect what Joachim has hidden, she is self-destructing her
mind!

Ziggy: What!

Mizrahi: MOMO! (MOMO collapses)

Girl: 100-Type prototype system functions stopped!

Mizrahi and Ziggy (rushing to her): MOMO!

Albedo (appearing on all screens): Hey there!

 

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4 September 2005 00:01 EDT | Posted by games6/shiseiten

2nd half...of part one anyway

(Back in the present)

Allen: Chief! Wait, chief. What's wrong? You seem strange today.

Shion: No, I'm the same as always.

Allen: Where are you headed?

Shion: To the town for a bit. It's been a while...

Allen: Been a while...? Oh yeah, you are originally from...

Shion: Right. The 8th district. Hey, Allen... Don't take your eyes off of KOS
MOS, okay?

Allen: Oh, all right... Why? (Shion walks away) She is very strange today.

__1.2.9: Moby Dicks Coffee__

Shion: Ah, I thought so! Hey bartender!

Bartender: Eh?

Shion: Hello!

Bartender: Ah, I thought "who could that be?" and it's Shion! You've become a
woman since I last saw you, when you were in high school!

Shion: Haven't I? It's been so long. Have you moved here?

Bartender: Well, I couldn't compete with the redevelopment... But at least the
inside of the store has remained the same.

Shion: Yeah, Moby Dick's has to look like this!

Bartender: Well, sit down! The usual?

Shion: Sure. And I'm kind of hungry, so something to eat too.

Bartender: Got it. So, is it your day off?

Shion: I wish it was. Unfortunately I have work. I've got some business at the
Second Branch.

Bartender: That's right, you are working for Vector. I heard from your brother.

Shion: Oh, my... brother... comes here?

Bartender: Oh yeah, quite often. What, you haven't seen him yet? You came all
the way back, you should at least see him once.

Shion: Even you... Even though you know I am uncomfortable around him...

(Someone comes in)

Bartender: Ah, speak of the devil...

Jr.: Look, chaos! The atmosphere is just like [p-quad?] in here!

chaos: Shion?

Shion: What are you two doing here?

Jr.: Ah, we were just hungry...you know...

chaos: ...and we happened across this place.

Bartender: Oh, friends of yours?

Shion: Ah, something like that...

chaos: "Something like that" is not a very nice way to say it...

Shion: Oh, I'm sorry, I'm just a little shaken up.

chaos: Shaken up? Why?

Bartender: Shion's family is a little complicated.

(in Helmar's office, Gaignun and the Godwin sisters arrive)

Gaignun: I'm terribly sorry we're late.

Helmar: Welcome! Ah, Shelley and Mary have gotten quite big!

Mary: Uncle Helmar! Been a while!

Shelley: Mary! It's "Helmar-sama"!

Helmar: Ah, don't worry about it. I feel like I have two daughters of my own.
So, Mary, have you been keeping up your accomplishments?

Mary: Oh, yes. I have been busy but I'm trying to become the best comedian in
the star cluster! My sister won't act as my partner, so lately I've been
thinking of scouting the Little Master!

Helmar: That's great. Make sure to invite me.

Mary: Yes!

(Helmar and Gaignun nod; Godwins leave)

Helmar: It's not very pleasant news, but... In addition to U-TIC's there have
been some other suspicious actions.

Gaignun: Yes.

Helmar: The peace treaty of 14 years ago was the best plan of action during the
chaos of the time, but I can't say that everyone has been upholding it
completely. That strain is now becoming apparent in the Federation. According to
Captain Roman, one faction seems to have the threat of an armed rebellion. The
Second Miltia government is observing lookout procedures, so you at the
Foundation should be very careful as well. Because as it is, right now you have
the Zohar Emulators and the 100-Type prototype in your pocket, and that makes
you a target.

Shelley (returning): Gaignun-sama... I have brought MOMO-chan.

Helmar: The 100-Type prototype.

Gaignun: Thanks. Bring her in.

MOMO: (Very polite introductory greeting). I am the 100-Type Observational
Realien Prototype, MOMO. I have completed brief internal-data research.

Canaan: 100-Type Realien.

MOMO: You are a Recording Elemental Expansion Type? (Polite phrase expressing
gratitude for future acts).

Helmar: She indeed looks much more like her than the mass-production models do.

Gaignun: Yes. She is surely Professor Mizrahi's posthumous child.

Helmar: I see. Fate is truly a mysterious thing. You have overcome much danger,
and done well. Now you will be analyzed at the U.M.N. Administrative Center. We
are prepared to support you in every way we can. Please accept your duty without
worry.

MOMO: Yes. Thank you for your concern. (Leaves, bows)

Helmar: Nigredo. There is a job that I must ask of you.

Gaignun: Search out the enemy?

Helmar: I'm sorry.

Gaignun: Don't be. It's my responsibility in the first place.

(Gaignun steps out and telepathically links with... Albedo!)

Gaignun: All right boy, where are you?

Albedo (Flying in E.S. Simeon somewhere): Nigredo!

Gaignun: Hey. I see you're doing hopelessly well as always.

Albedo: I see you're as skillful a talker as always. What's wrong? Were you
lonely? You worthless thing.

Gaignun: What. I'm just looking for a little information. And leaving the
possibility for a peace agreement.

Albedo: A peace agreement? McCartney said that black and white should get along.
Hahahaha... I know what you truly are. "Executioner".

Gaignun: I threw away that position long ago.

Albedo: Is that so? Aren't you just sticking by Rubedo hoping for a chance to
perform your professional duties? I'll be borrowing Rubedo. You're on the
outside of this, anyway. I'm really looking forward to what you'll do!

Gaignun: Wait! That-- (his eyes flash, and Albedo's arm blows up)

Albedo: Scary, scary! You've always been that kind of guy... Showing such a calm
face, but hiding fangs of death. Hahahahaha... (fades away)

Gaignun (to self): He is going to try linking to U-Du after all. And, what is he
planning to do to Rubedo?

(Back at Moby Dicks)

Jr: Mmmmmm allright!!!!

chaos: I see, this place is Shion's roots, when it comes to curry.

Shion: You figured me out! Oh by the way, how is MOMO? All right?

chaos: They say the main scan will be tomorrow. Looks like there's no problems
so far.

Jr.: That's how it is. We had some extra time, so we came to town.

Shion: Oh.

chaos: What about you? Did you turn over KOS-MOS yet?

Shion: Yeah. I kind of left it up to Allen. It could take a while depending on
the situation.

Jr.: Did something happen? You look depressed....

Shion: Oh, some things... And, I'd been with her for a long time, so parting was
kind of difficult.

Jr.: Hmm, is that how it is....

chaos: Well, for example, what if you were told you had to give up your
treasured Carles [is this some type of gun? help me, gun people] scope, how
would you feel?

Jr.: Oh, that would be terrible. My wallet and my heart would both be sad.

chaos: See?

Shion: Could you please not compare Jr.'s collection and KOS-MOS?

Jin: Good day, bartender.

Bartender: Ah, welcome! It's funny that you should come in; Shion just-- Uh?

(Shion is no longer in her seat)

(Jr. gives away her presence)

Jr.: Hmmm Where's Shion? Uh! Drum playing? Your heart..? Shit! I don't know, what is it Shion?

Shion: Not so loud!

Jin: Shion? And, that's a voice I've heard somewhere...

Shion: Uh... It's been a while...

Jin: I am Jin. Jin Uzuki. It's a pleasure to meet you.

chaos: The pleasure is mine. [as if they haven't met]

Jin: So, you are Shion's companions. Has my foolish little sister been troubling
you?

Shion: "Foolish" is a bit much.

chaos: Not at all. Shion has been taking quite good care of us.

Jin: Is that true? You don't need to mind just because she is here.

Shion: Brother!

Jin: Hm, I am not feeling very welcomed...

Shion: It's not that, I just--

Jin: Bartender! I'll have the same thing. Extremely spicy.

Shion: Hey, would you listen when people are talking?

Jin: I'm listening. So, what were you saying?

Shion: Nevermind, I'm tired of it.

Jin: Really, if you had told me you were coming I would have come out to meet
you. How long are you here?

Shion: Oh, I was very busy, and as soon as we arrived I had work to do... And I
have to be ready to go back to the main branch by tonight--

Jr.: What?? You said we had a while--oi!!

Shion (kicks Jr.): It's nothing! Nothing! (Her phone rings) Oh, who could that
be?

Allen: Chief! Hello. About KOS-MOS... It's going to take two or three more days
before [some technobabble about coding]. It looks like we're going to be
lounging around here for a while. Uh, what's wrong, chief? You seem unhappy.

Shion: (sigh)... Could this be [harassment of newcomers]?

Allen: Huh?

Shion: Nothing. The timing of your report was good enough to bring me to tears.
Thank you.

Allen: Wait, chief!

Jin: I see. Lounging around for a while, is it?

Shion: I understand. I'll go. I'll come home. Are you happy?

Jin: Ah yes, how would you two like to come to our home? It's not very far from
here.

Jr.: What should we do?

chaos: If we were to come, we would interrupt the two of you siblings being
reunited... (Shion begs) Ah, uh, sure, we would love to come, for a bit. Thanks
for asking.

__1.2.10: At the Uzukis'__

Jr.: chaos, look, this house is made of *wood*!

chaos: Yeah, and on top of that, look! It's amazing; this place is a bookstore!

Jr.: Awesome! Super-antique! I should have brought Gaignun!

Shion: I knew it.

chaos: You knew what?

Shion: Brother! What is this? I thought you were going to start working as a
doctor!

Jin: What's wrong with you? When you return to your home, shouldn't you first
say something like, "I'm back"?

Shion: Yes, if it's a *normal* home! What happened? Don't tell me you got bored
and changed jobs again. It hasn't even been half a year!

Jin: being a doctor did not suit me very well. The main task was being a
conversational partner for the neighborhood's old folks; mental care. The
medicine and nanomachines cure everything other than mental illnesses, so that's
all that's left to do. Even without making the investment to become a doctor, I
can still have conversations. But I thought, if I had something to sell, I might
be able to gain a bit from it.

Shion: What do you mean, gain from it? Didn't you just decide to try making a
profit on a hobby you already had? You never made much of an investment into
becoming a doctor anyway. Most of all, what about this mountain of books? Isn't
this even more of an investment? Where did you get all of these books anyway?

Jin: Half of them were stored away in our grandfather's cellar. You've seen them
before, when you were younger. The other half are from customers. Lots of very
distinguished people come here. I have no lack of sources. But, more
importantly, our guests...

Shion: Oh, right! I was so wrapped up in how different this place looks that I
forgot... Jr.! chaos! Please, come on in-- Uh, what are you doing?

Jr. (with tall stacks of books): Oh, uh, I was just thinking of buying these...

chaos: Oh, thank you for having us...

Jr.: But-- These books!

chaos: You can buy all the books you want later, come on.

------------------------------------

 

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4 September 2005 00:01 EDT | Posted by games6/shiseiten

I have just start translating the Japanese Script for you people. Since you all requested it some time ago so I'm sorry to put it up late! It’s not complete yet. But it’s very similar to the NA version. Just think of the NA version more child friendly ^-~

Allen: Ahhh, I can’t believe we’re alive!

Jr.: Yeah, no kidding. I thought we were in for it for sure…

Allen: I’m telling you, the array of stuff the chief pulls always keeps me on edge.

Shion: What are you saying? You make it sound like..I did it!

Allen: Gomen, I did not mean that! KOS-MOS!
You saved our lives, thanks!

KOS-MOS: I am happy to be of service to all of you.

Jr.: Oi, me, pops and the two kids are going to the government office now. What are up to doing, Shion?

Shion: Hmm. Well, we need to hand over KOS-MOS. I think I’ll go to second division, ai KOS-MOS?

KOS-MOS: Acknowledged. That will not be a problem.

Jr.: Mmmhmm. You do have to do that job, yeah? You still going to be hanging here? We can go somewhere later if you would like.

Shion: That’d be great! I’ll show you around this place,
MOMO.

MOMO: Thank you, Shion-san. MOMO's looking forward to it!

Shion: All right. Let’s go KOS-MOS.

KOS-MOS: (to Jr., MOMO, Ziggy and chaos) Please excuse us. Good-bye.

Shion and KOS-MOS left the scene.

Allen: What the? Hey, Chief! Wait up!

Allen left the scene and catches up with Shion and KOS-MOS.

Jr.: Heh. I guess we better get going, yeah?

Ziggy: Sorry…could you wait just a little while? I’m going to report
what’s happened to the Subcommittee. (to MOMO) It appears that Dr.
Mizrahi has also arrived at Miltia, as well. If you have a message for
her.

MOMO: Really? Mommy?

Ziggy: Yes.

MOMO: Please let her know that I’m looking forward to seeing her.

Ziggy: Got it. I’ll pass it along.

Later, Ziggy uses a U.M.N. terminal and contacts Juli Mizrahi.

Juli: All right. Continue your assignment until the delivery is
complete.

Ziggy: Acknowledged.

There was a brief pause.

Ziggy: Dr. Mizrahi.

Juli: Yes, Jan Sauer. Is there something else?

There was another brief pause.

Ziggy: I am currently Ziggurat 8 for the moment.

Juli: So it appears.

Ziggy: MOMO…is looking forward to seeing you.

Juli: I see. I… I, too, welcome your arrival.

The communication ended. Ziggy closes his eyes for a brief moment and
then opens them.

Ziggy: "Eavesdropping is a hobby I never had much interest in."

Jr. proposes that Ziggy get his body upgraded to a carbon frame, installed by
specialist realiens.

Ziggy: "I don't see any need to extend my life span any longer."

Jr.: "MOMO would be happy to see you live longer."

Ziggy: "No, I'll pass. I don't intend to live long."

Jr.: "All right... Let me know if you ever change your mind."

__1.2.6: A Peaceful Drive__

(Ziggy walks down to the car where the others are waiting.)

MOMO: Ziggy: What did Mama say?

Ziggy: Oh, yes. She seemed very busy.

MOMO: Oh, I figured...

Ziggy: She seems to support the subcommittee very much. It must be a very
demanding job.

MOMO: I suppose so. MOMO has to work hard to help her!


As they are driving along the highway, two huge freaking robots fly up out of
nowhere and start attacking them.

MOMO: Aiiieeeee

Jr.: The hell!?

Ziggy: Jr. who are they?

Jr.: Albedo? No, it’s placid for him.

Chaos: eh!

Jr.: Damn, it’s no good on auto, somebody drive it!

MOMO: MOMO wants to!

MOMO crawls under Jr. to get to the front seat.

Jr.: Eh!? Hey, kid!

MOMO: MOMO will do it!

Jr.: Eh…

MOMO: Jr.-san!?

Jr.: 2089! Speed it up!


Jr. shoots them with his pistols and MOMO
takes over the controls of the car, heading for a location specified by Jr.
They are chased by the robots a bit longer until chaos tosses a fire
extinguisher, Jr. shoots it, and they escape down a big flight of stairs. Jr.
has taken them to the fully automated area of town so as to minimize
involvement of civilians. What a guy.

__1.2.7: Backup__

Jr.(telepathically): Gaignun! We're headed to 2089! Tell Helmar we need some
backup! (Gaignun is in some sort of unconscious state at his desk) Hey!
Nii-san!!

Gaignun: Sorry. What's the situation?

Jr.: 2089!

Gaignun: Got it... (to himself) What the hell. What was I doing just now?

Helmar(on phone): Understood. Backup is on its way. It's headed for the
rendezvous point. (hangs up) So, now even out in the open is not safe anymore?

(After a while, Jr. and the others are found by the two huge robots.)

Richalt: It's been a while! You look well! You remember me, don't you? Richalt
is my name. You should remember it, before you die.

Jr.: I hope you burn in hell!

Afterwards, another huge robot with some
sort of big claw appears.)

Pellegry: Both of you, out of the way! I'll take care of the rest! (Her big
claw divides into what look like Aerods, which fire at the group.) Any further
resistance is pointless. Quietly hand over the 100-Type!

(The Aerod-looking things are blown up, and E.S. Asher appears.)

Jr.: That vehicle! Canaan!?

Canaan: Rubedo! Get down!

. Jr. scolds
Canaan for calling him Rubedo,

Jr.: Oi! You could have came sooner, yeah!?

Canaan: Further enemy pursuit is not the matter. I must head back, see you later, Rubedo.

Jr.: Oi oi! No one calls me Rubedo, hear me?

Canaan: I can’t rid of that image of you.

(Jr.
thinks back to 14 years ago.)

Rubedo: Someone! Someone! Help us! It doesn't stop! Nigredo's blood won't stop!

Nigredo: It's all right, Rubedo. No more.

Rubedo: Stupid! You can't give up!

(A light shines on them)

Canaan: U.R.T.V., two units found. Confirmed.

chaos: A red horse brings war. A black horse, famine. In their small shape,
they carry such great strife.

Canaan: The voice channel is noisy; I couldn't hear you. What is it, chaos?

chaos: Nothing. Let's save them.

Jr.: Me. It's my fault. Even though I'm the leader, I broke the ring. That's
why Albedo...

Canaan: Albedo?

Jr.: He's... A fragment of me. The beating in my chest.

Canaan: I got a result. Albedo-- Unit number 667. Conjoined to Unit 666 in the womb. They are imperfect separation can
occur.

chaos: The white horse's rider was polluted, as well... We'll bring peace to
your wounds and your spirits. Even if it's just a moment's rest...

(Back in Second Miltia)

Jr.: I guess you could say I owe those two my life.

MOMO: You've known chaos for a long time too... Um, would it be all right for
me to call you Rubedo? It's a very nice name!

Jr.: Uh... Sorry, that's...

MOMO: MOMO’s sorry...

Jr.: Uh, no, it's just, not a name that brings back good memories.

MOMO: Jr. and Ziggy both dislike your real names.

Jr.: It's because names have good or bad memories associated with them. Pops
over there probably has all sorts of burdens on him. But that's all right. Pops
seems to like the name "Ziggy".

MOMO: Then I'm happy!

Jr.: Even if it does make him sound like a low level mutt!

__1.2.8: Second Branch__

(At Vector Industries 2nd Development Branch)

Shion: Project Zohar?

Guy: Yes. Its spread is evident by the acceleration of the Gnosis phenomenon.
It has been predicted that in the worst-case scenario, within several years the
entire human race could be ruined by Gnosis. Already, more than 120 solar
systems have been annihilated. Even without its having been made public, this
truth is bearing down upon us.

Shion: I understand the situation. But, what does any of it have to do with
KOS-MOS?

Guy: Come this way.

(They are taken to a room in which some vaguely cool-looking designs are
displayed.)

Allen: This is amazing.

Guy: KOS-MOS Mark Three. Designed to prevail in the absolute worst possible
situation.

Shion: What do you mean, absolute worst situation?

Guy: Project Zohar is a grand strategy to completely wipe out Gnosis from this
universe. For that purpose, we must salvage the Original Zohar stored away
on Miltia. The Original Zohar has, for over half a century, been researched as
the most powerful energy source in this universe. But, the key of the Zohar is
this: the core unit needed to restrain the Zohar is a double-edged sword.

Shion: A double-edged sword?

Guy: This. (He shows a screen.) A phenomenon called U-du. Other than that early
on the core unit goes out of control, the details are completely unknown. It's
because of this that Miltia is the way it is today. What we must not forget is
that Gnosis appeared in unison with this phenomenon.

Allen: Do you mean to say that more Gnosis will appear with it again?

Guy: It can't be determined for sure. But it is a definite possibility.

Shion: So then, in KOS-MOS, you want to install... units on both shoulders-- a
general transference system?

Guy: The flower of First Branch, it could only be Chief Uzuki.

Shion: Don't make fun of me.

Guy: I'm sorry. Also, something created for the archetype version, but which
was refit for the current KOS-MOS. The system's radius is 130 nanometers.

Allen: 130!?

Shion: Can you control something on such a scale?

Guy: Leave it to us and the military research office. That is why we moved KOS
MOS here.

Shion: What if I told you I can't hand her over?

Guy: This is an officially planned government project. A chief who wrote one
piece of software does not have the authority to overrule it.

Shion: I suppose not.

Guy: I can understand that you would be uneasy, considering the circumstances
of KOS-MOS's activation, but it is all right. With the data from KOS-MOS's
previous activity, the main company thinks we can perform it correctly. We
agree. Our preparations are complete.

Shion: I guess I have no choice but to trust you.

Guy: You should. After all, the one who designed this system is Kevin, from the
First Branch.

Shion: I understand. I will deliver KOS-MOS to the Second Development Branch at
14:00. I'll send the documents, so if there's anything you need, contact me.
I'll leave the software delivery to him, so if there is anything you don't
understand...

Guy: Understood. Thank you very much.

(Shion walks out; she starts reminiscing)

Shion: To save people's lives?

Kevin: Yes. You could say that's why she's being born. Her awakening will mean
the future to a lot of people. I can't wait for that day.

Shion: This spaceship is also part of KOS-MOS's equipment, right? A vehicle
that can reach hyperspace even without contact with the U.M.N. Column. This
exists to save people's lives too?

Kevin: Yeah... If you look at it the big picture, I guess it does. I hope it'll
be useful to her some day. It may sound weird to say this, but I believe-- no,
I *want* to believe-- that she's not just a weapon used to destroy, but that
the future she makes will be a better one, with no destruction or slaughter. An
ideal world. (Shion laughs) Ah, I guess I'm pretty weird.

Shion: Oh, no, just... How should I say it... Ah, your eyes just looked so
pure, like a child's... Kevin-sempai.

Kevin: Ah, I was just so happy... When I'm in an official capacity I'll try to
be careful.

Shion: But, I'd like to see her too. KOS-MOS, when she wakes up.


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16 March 2005 00:01 EST | Posted by games6/shiseiten
Xenosaga II Japanese Double Attack Quotes.
I just had to share you all these quotes because for the North American version..they were toned down....alot!!
The Japanese ones are just down right...shall I say cheesy? O_________________O


MOMO & Jr.'s

MOMO: Jr.-san!?

Jr.: It's Payday!!
___________________________

Shion & Jin's

Shion: Don't screw up, Jin!

Jin: Likewise!!

_______________________
Shion & Jin's second attack

Jin: Shion, get ready!

Shion: Yaaaaaah!
___________________

Ziggy & Jr.'s

Jr.: Think they've been giving us too much shit?

Ziggy: Sizzling....?

Jr.: Oooh I love a good roast!!
_____________________________

Shion & Jr.'s

Shion: Feathers, hear our prayers!

Jr.: Oh Shion!

Both: Aaaaahhh!!

_________________

chaos & Shion's

chaos: Shion, grab my hand!

Shion: Got it. Go!!!

___________________________

KOS-MOS & Shion's

Shion: KOS-MOS, Hilbert effect!

KOS-MOS: Commencing...

__________________________

chaos & Jin's

Jin: My savior, let's finish this!

chaos: Aeeeyaaah!!

_____________________

chaos & Jr.'s

Jr.: Tough enough to handle it, kid?

chaos: You know it!

Jr.: That's what I like to hear!

______________________________

MOMO & chaos'

chaos: MOMO....trust me.

MOMO: Yes!

________________________

MOMO & Shion's

Shion: MOMO can you do it?

MOMO: All for it!

________________________

KOS-MOS & chaos'

chaos: Shall I have this dance?

KOS-MOS: Confirmed.


Wow...and just when you thought the american version was too much. I'll translate more later. I know the masses want it. ciao!

 

 


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12 February 2005 00:01 EST | Posted by games6/shiseiten

This last part in the manga takes up all volume one and it’s about Jr. gambling, which is pretty funny if I say. I spend about a month translating it and finding good English equivalents.

I didn’t bother to put down the sound effects….they really didn’t make much less of a sense anyway. I really don’t know why they are there in the first place! :o
Someone made a parody of this once….it was sometime ago though. Anyway, I hope I did a good job with this one.

Title: chaotic nights


Coincidentally, Jr. bumped into KOS-MOS, who was also wandering the halls in search of something.

Jr.: KOS-MOS! Hey you look bored. Why not come to the Gambling Room with me?

KOS-MOS: Gambling is highly irrelevant to my mission and is extremely inappropriate for an android such as myself. Also, the games are rigged and would be a waste of my time and money.

Jr.: This is MY ship and my games are CERTAINLY not rigged. At least come and watch me win my victories.

KOS-MOS: I was currently in the middle of accomplishing Shion's orders."

Jr.: Forget her. She's just 'all work and no play'. That's why you're so hardcore. She never lets you have any fun."

KOS-MOS: I am also telling you this for your own good. According to my calculations, the probability of you winning a single card game is a 00.002% chance."

Jr.: KOS-MOS I think you're malfunctioning. I'm the coolest person on the Durandal. I CAN'T lose. Now come on! We've already wasted five minutes of gambling time!
-------------------------------------
Later...

Jr.: OUTRAGEOUS! WHAT DO YOU MEAN THAT I CAN'T GAMBLE HERE!?

Dealer: Well, Little Master, it's not the fact that you can’t gamble here, it's the fact that you aren't old enough to.

Jr.: What are you talking about!? I’m twenty-nine years old and this my ship thank you very much!!

Dealer: Little Master you obviously don't look twenty-nine. And even if you were, do you have an ID present?"

Jr.: Huh? *looks in pockets* Where did it go!?

Falshback----------------------: Elsa:

Tony: I took Little Master’s ID!
Hammer: Free beer for us!


Present -------------

Dealer: I rest my case.

Jr.: INSIGNIFICANCE! SAYS WHO THAT I CAN'T GAMBLE HERE!?

Dealer: It's the law, sir.

Jr.: Well then, I'll just have to report this to the Administration Committee, now won't I?

Dealer: Sure, sir.


Jr.: *squints* Hey, didn't I see your name on the Mary and Shelly Fan Club list?

Dealer: I admire Mary and Shelly very so much…

Jr.: Good… CAUSE NOW YOU'RE OFF OF IT!"

Dealer: W-What?
Sfx:sobsob

Jr.: That's right, I hereby declare you off from the list.

KOS-MOS: This man is only obeying his orders. You, on the other hand, are clearly attempting to deny the rights of his enjoyments. Surely…

Jr.: Shut up you stupid android! Just what would you know about gambling, laws and order and marketing!?

KOS-MOS: Well, due to the absence of two of those ideals, I—

Jr.: Shut up! And you dealer, will pay for this. Dearly.

-------------------------------------
10 minute later

Jr.: This is much more like it! For my first game, I would like to play poker.

Dealer: Right, do you have a pre-made deck?

Jr.: As a matter of fact I do! It’s called ‘The Best Deck In The Entire World Because It Features Gaignun Jr. (That’s Me) on all of The Cards.


Dealer: Right…In that case I will be playing with my Supreme Nemesis Deck.

Jr.: I’m not scared of you!

KOS-MOS: it seems to me that your cockiness will prove to be your adversary. Are you confirming your decision wisely?

Jr.: Be quiet! Just LOOK at MY deck!
Sfx:fanfanfanfan

KOS-MOS: That deck shows your conceitedness.

Jr.: I am not conceited! I am a winner! Now I begin!

Dealer: Y-Yes, sir…

Jr.: It's good to be King…

-----------------------------------------------
20 minute later

Jr.: Hahaha Another win! Next victim!

Man: So, you're the Little Master who has won 34 games straight in a row?

Jr.: Yeah, What's it to you?

Man: I'm here to challenge you.

Jr.: Bring it on fat boy. *Does the 'come on' sign.*

Man: You're going to regret those words, pansy.

Jr.: PANSY!? DID YOU JUST CALL ME PANSY!?

Man: Yeah I did.

Jr.: Good, Just thought that I didn't hear you correctly.

*On the other side of the room, KOS-MOS was trying her luck at slots.*

KOS-MOS: If I wait approximately 0.603 seconds, then my chances of winning 75 million gold will be pushed up to 99.999%.

Machine: Congratulations! You've just won 75 million gold!
-------------------------------------------
40 minute later

Jr.: I can't believe I'm losing! I can't believe I'm losing to …a Skull Card. Are you sure that these 'special' cards you have are legal in the tournament?

Man: Of course! *puts down a cheap drawn skull card* Now this is an instant death to all cards.
Sfx: It’s great to cheat!


Jr.: I won't accept defeat. Another match! I'll bet I can beat you this time!

Man: What's the bet?

Jr.: I'll bet my EXCLUSIVE guns here!

*KOS-MOS passed by*

KOS-MOS: Gaignun Kukai Jr… are you sure…

Jr.: YES I'M SURE! NOW GO AWAY!

*KOS-MOS shrugs and exits the Gambling Room.*

Jr.: Begin!

--------------------------------------
50 minute later

Man: Well, I must thank you for your parting with these guns here…

Jr.: No! How could I lose!? This is MY gambling table!
Sfx:slamslam

Man: It was a pleasure doing business with you…

Jr.: Wait! *tosses coat on table* I'll bet this!

Man: Suit yourself. It's your funeral.

Jr.: I won't lose THIS time!

--------------------------------------

*MOMO walked past the room*
Sfx:shuffleshuffle

Jr.: I lost again!?


Jr.: It's not fair!

Man: Hey, thanks for the coat, but you don't have anything left to gamble with. Besides, you've been playing all night. Don't you think that it's time for you to stop?

Jr.: NEVER! I WILL find something else to bet against!

MOMO: What are you doing?

Jr.: Come here, MOMO,
Sfx: grabgrab jerk
Jr.: I will bet you this bracelet that I can win the next match!"

Man: Hey, I ain't betting for pretty stuff.

Jr.: No way. This is a SILVER bullet. Made completely from…SILVER."

MOMO: But you gave it to me!!!

Jr.: Quiet, kid! I'll get you another one! My reputation is on the line.

*MOMO ran off, crying.*

Man: That was pretty dirty…

Jr.: Shut up! Are you here to play, or are you here to play?

Man: I guess I'm here to play.

Jr.: Good! Now shuffle the cards.

---------------------------------
70 minute later

Man: Geez. You don't have anything left to gamble with. You've been playing at this table since yesterday. Don't you think that it's time for you to quit?

*KOS-MOS appears once again*

KOS-MOS: I find it quite odd that a life form such as yourself would still be wasting your time in a room such as this.

Jr.: And just what are you doing here, KOS-MOS?

KOS-MOS: I never said that android could not participate in your human sports. On the contrary, I seem to be faring much better than you anyhow.

Jr.: Ha! I have double that amount in my savings account!

Man: Oh? Really?

KOS-MOS: I have overheard what you have done to MOMO. And to tell you the truth, I find that quite inappropriate. Surely it would be in your best interest to cease gambling and go apologize.

Jr.: Bah I will tomorrow All right, new match!

Man: Hmm…about those saving accounts of yours…

Jr.: Certainly! I have credit cards as well.
Sfx:throwthrow

Jr.: And the documents to my savings accounts will be mailed to you…..have I the misfortune of losing.

-------------------------------------------
90 minute later

Man: You know what? I'm personally sick and tired of beating you. And I never thought I'd say that.

Jr.: NO!I may have lost everything but there's just one thing that I have left.

Man: Oh really?

Jr.: You see this ship we're flying on?

Sfx: (Uh-oh…)

Man: Yeah. What about it?

Jr.: It belongs to ME.

Man: YOU!? Ow the Durandal!?"

Jr.: Well then I guess you don't want it.
Sfx: gather gather

Man: You're serious?

Jr.: Of course I'm serious you idiot. How dare you call Gaignun Jr. a LIAR! I should have you persecuted with your arms severed by cannibals all over the universe with––

Man: All right, Just pick up those cards of yours that you just threw all over me and we'll play.

Jr.: I bet my ship and the ownership of it against your cards.

Man: We'll see about that.

Jr.: I sneer at your cards!

-----------------------------
5 minute later

Jr.: NO! I LOST MY RIGHTS TO THE DURANDAL!

Man: Much obliged, And so that I won't smear my winning streak, I'm going to start working on my prize. First off, I'm going to turn the Durandal into an amusement park!"

Jr.: What!?

Man: Of course! But first I need to learn to fly this thing!

Jr.: You are not touching my ship!

Man: Ah ah but it is mine now.

Jr.: tch!

Everyone aboard: AAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!
---------------------------------------------

Title: (Original Japanese): Menbaa Hoshuuchuu
Title (English):

In progress.


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Title: (Original Japanese): Omoshikomi wa Kochira made
Title (English):

In progress.


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Title: (Original Japanese): Mekara Biimu
Title (English):

In progress.


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Title: (Original Japanese): Chotto Niteta
Title (English):

In progress.


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Title: (Original Japanese): Mune wo Kakusuimi wo Oshiete Kudasai
Title (English):

In progress.


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Title: (Original Japanese): Mizugi Chikku Kikan
Title (English):

In progress.

 

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10 February 2005 00:01 EST | Posted by games6/shiseiten

From the Official Xenosaga Episode II Anthology by BC Collection. (Published by Mag Garden)

Note:
- I've tried to translate the sound effects (sfx) as much as possible, but for those where I could not really find an English equivalent, I've kept in it's original form.


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Title (English): Swimsuit Equinox (?)

Jr.: Sea ------! Summer ------!
Swimsuits --------!

Jin: Oh my, it's great to be young, isn't it...
By the way, I'm in my swimsuit too ^___-

Shion: Wait, Nii-san!?
Isn't this a "loincloth"!!
A loinclothisn't a swimsuit, isn't in underwear!?

Jin: How rude, Shion. This red loincloth is waterproof.
It's a perfectly legitimate swimsuit.
An underwear-type loincloth is over here...

Shion: How embarrassing ----- !
I understand!! I understand already.
Stop waving it around ------ !!


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Title (English): Minitskirt!

Jr.: Shion... you changed outfits...
Momo: Yes!
Uh... Um ----
It doesn't suit me?
sfx: fidget fidget

Jr.: sfx: Thadump
Ah!! I didn't mean that!!
Jr: (Thinking) It's just that...
Nice miniskirt!
I won't get to see that appearance again...
That nostalgic heat-pounding feeling...

Jin: You won't get to see it anymore?
Then, let me give you the heartpounding <3 thrill!

sfx: chira chira chira
paparapa (1) -----

Jr.: How about we abandon that freak out into space.
Shion: Yeah.

sfx:Sound of trumpets going off


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Title (English): A Whole New World (?) (1)

Currently not translated.

Summary: Jr. and gang come across a ladder and Shion says that there's no way they can proceed ahead unless they climb up the ladder. She then tells all the guys to go up the ladder first, since if the girls go up first the guys will be able to peek under their skirts. (Though honestly, I don't know why she bothers to do this, since in Episode II none of the girls wear skirts anymore. Maybe she just doesn't want the guys looking at the girl's butts?)

The guys go up in the order: Ziggy, Jin and Junior. (Dunno where chaos is) As Jin is climbing up, his kimono flaps open and Jr. who's below him is treated to a rather, er, ungainly sight. :p Jr. is so traumatised that he passes out and falls down the ladder. (Hence the title - it refers to the fact that poor Jr. has been introduced to a new world of something he could never have imagined before.)

(1) Not quite sure how to translate this. I think it means something along the lines of being exposed to something that a person has never seen before, such that it's impact is to make it seem as if a whole new world has opened up to that person. (Eek, hope that made sense)


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Title (English): My First Impression

Shion: KOS-MOS!
sfx: pata pata (1)
Shion: That appearance... Is your tuning finished?
KOS-MOS: Yes.
Shion: sfx: stare ------ ...
Shion: So solid ---- !! (?)
KOS-MOS: Is that all you want to say? Shion.

(1) Sound of footsteps

(Did anyone manage to get this joke? Care to explain it to me?)


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Title (English): Smiling Chaos

chaos: Taa!
Yaa!
sfx: smile smile
sfx: Bam
Wham
chaos: Sorry!
sfx: smile smile
sfx: Thwap
chaos: sfx: smile
It's great that that fight was over so fast, wasn't it?

Jr.: Please stop smiling in the midst of battle...
sfx: shiver shiver shiver

Everyone: *behind Jr.* sfx: Eeeeeeek
sfx: shiver
chaos: Why? sfx: wipe wipe It's good to smile.

Battle cries

Jr.: Who left me with these people!?


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Title (English): 00Ziggy

Jin: Ziggy-san is really cool ----

Ziggy: Is that so?

Jin: I want to be something like a cyborg too.

Ziggy: There's nothing that great about it...

Arrow: Japanese sword
sfx: clank
clank
Arrow: Fundoshi
sfx: bika ----- (1)
clank
Arrow: Japanese sword

Imaginary Shion: Nii-san's so amazing!

Jin: How great... Cyborgs.
sfx: dreamy

Ziggy: What!?
What was that vision just now!?

Sound of beams being emitted


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Title (English): 00MOMO

MOMO: Ziggy's really cool ----

Ziggy: Is that so?

MOMO: MOMO wants to be as strong as Ziggy -----

Ziggy: ... You're fine just the way you are now...

Arrow: Albedo
sfx: Splurt
Imaginary Albedo: Peche ----
Arrow: Jr.
Imaginary Jr.: MOMO!!
Arrow: Breast missiles
sfx: bika
roar
boom
Side text: Full height 14m

MOMO: Ufufufufu

Ziggy: MOMO ----- !!!

Laughing


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Title (English): Shion is

Shion: chaos was in the bathroom...

Jr.: Yeah I arranged so you could see your lover.

Shion: chaos is not my lover!

Jr.: You know, Maybe we can arrange a cabin switch on the Elsa. I’m sure MOMO won’t mind being alone, and chaos’s room is soundproof anyway, so–

Shion: Shutup!

 

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Title (English): Shion is 2

Shion: I have so much work to do!

Jr.: I'm sure chaos can help with th-

Shion: Unless you want Jin to stay in your room, you will not finish that sentence!

Jr.:......


Posted by games6/shiseiten at 8:40 PM EST
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Thursday, 15 January 2004

 


Jr.: If you don’t tell me who you’re working for… I’ll shoot.

Assistant Scott: Well, if you kill me, you’ll never find out who I’m working for.

Jr.: I’m not going to kill you. *smirks and aims the gun a bit lower.*

Scott: You… wouldn’t…

Jr.: Oh yes I would… I have ways of making you useless to a woman!

Shion: I resent that!

Jr.: Hey – wha… what’s going on!

Shion: Lunch is ready! Sweet fancy!! Allen! Have you no decency!

*was repulsed at the sight of Tony and Allen in a rather compromising position.*

Tony and Allen: What? We didn’t do anything.

Jr.: What’s going on! * managed to break free of Ziggy’s grasp.* Ahh shit.

Tony: Wait – this isn’t what it looks like!

KOS-MOS: I am offended by this. I am leaving this area.

Jr.: Look, man – just take it. Keep it please.

*Jr. handed Tony his coat and followed KOS-MOS and the others back upstairs.*

-----------------------------------------

Kirshwasser: Albedo?

Albedo: Not now, father, just five more minutes.

Kirshwasser: Uhm, Albedo!

Albedo: WHAT?

Kirshwasser: It's February 17th...

Albedo: ARE YOU SAYING I MISSED VALENTINE'S DAY?!

Kirshwasser: *nods*

Albedo: What about the Character Themed Pies? Are they okay?

Kirshwasser: They went stale.

Albedo: Even Shion's Bint Pie and MOMO's Peach Pie and Junior's I-am-a-master-sharpshooter-who-takes-your-fame Pie and chaos's--

Kirshwasser: *firmly* ALL THE PIES.

Albedo: AH MAN. ...Did the mice get to the paper Valentines?

Kirshwasser: I sent those off already.

Albedo: YAY! Don't tell anyone about the pies.

Kirshwasser: Okay. ...Which reminds me.

Wilhelm: Where's my V-day pie?

Albedo: Drat.

-----------------------------------------


chaos: Yar.

Shion: Yar?

chaos: Say it with me. Yar.

Shion: Yar.

Tony: You are all idiots.

chaos: I know where you sleep at night, BUDDY.

Tony: ...

chaos: Yea, I'm gonna GET you.

Tony: ...MATTHEWS!!!

Matthews: chaos, what did I tell you about harassing your fellow crewmates?

chaos: He started it!

Matthews: And I'm putting a stop to it. Play nice.

chaos: Oh, I WILL.

Tony: ACK!

Matthews: Relax, he promised.

chaos: I'm a MAN OF MY WORD!

Tony: OH COME ON! He's being evil. I KNOW!

Shion: You're imagining things.

chaos: Hey, Shion, wanna go get me some curry? Matthews can help.

Matthews: Let's go, Ms. Vector!

Shion: Whee!

Tony: NO! DON'T LEAVE ME ALONE WITH HIM!
-------------------------------------------------

 

Junior: Oh no! Gnosis! Allow me to lend a han—

KOS-MOS: Your support is minuscule and unnecessary.

Junior: Excuse me?!

KOS-MOS: Do not interfere.

Junior: Forget that! Take this!!

[Junior executes Moonlit Serenade, somehow getting KOS-MOS within shooting range. But that doesn't matter, because she emerges from the wreck without a scratch]

Junior: YEA! WHO'S MINUS... Guh?

KOS-MOS: [brushing herself off] Damage to Person: Below minimum. I cannot compute. Commencing Battle Mode.

Shion: You just HAD to get her angry.

KOS-MOS: Incorrect. No emotions are needed to execute 'corporal punishment.' You have violated my direct order an—

Junior: YOU'RE GOING TO SPANK ME?!

KOS-MOS: Affirmitive. Charging... R-WHIP.

Junior: Whoa that is so not spanking. Heh… *pervert look*

------------------------------------------------

Junior: I can help you without giving advice.

KOS-MOS: According to my calculations, you are in no position to help me, let alone give me advice.

Junior: OH COME ON! LEMME TRY.

KOS-MOS: Negative.

Junior: PLEASE?

KOS-MOS: Do not make me use force, Gaignun.Kukai.Junior.

Junior: C'MON. I CAN DO IT.

chaos: Junior, let her handle the arcade game. Quite frankly, you suck.

MOMO: Even I can beat you.

Junior: I HATE YOU ALL!!!
-------------------------------------------------

Jr: AT LEAST... uh, AT LAST. I can confront Albedo and kill him good.

Shion: Whoo, yay.

Wilhelm: Uh, about that...

Jr: OH WHAT NOW!?

Wilhelm: There's been a change in the Testament Roster.

Shion: [not surprised] Albedo?

Wilhelm: Yes... I fired him.

Kevin: WHAT? Why?!

Wilhelm: There were some... complications.

Shion: Waiiit that sounded like Kev-

Wilhelm: Quiet woman!

-------------------------------------------------
KOS-MOS: All your base is belong to us.
Shion: ?

KOS-MOS: Your Internet-speak interests me.

Shion: I didn't program you to be interested in stupid stuff like that...

KOS-MOS: Well, I didn't expect a kind of Spanish Inquisition!

Three Orange Testaments: NOBODY EXPECTS THE SPANISH INQUISITION.

Shion: What in the...?!

Junior: [rolls eyes] I don't think you programmed pop culture references into her program either, right?

Shion: Err...

KOS-MOS: Shouldn't you be compensating?

Junior: Just couldn't resist a jab at my manhood, huh?!

Shion: Stop it, you two. KOS-MOS, quote Edgar Allen Poe!

KOS-MOS: What are you, dense?

Shion: Okay, shut up now. Grrrr.

KOS-MOS: I'm the one named Sailor Senshi.

Shion: Stop encouraging her!

----------------------------------------------
Albedo: Hey, Marguilis, you know what? You're like, a sexy loser.

Margilus: Awww...

Albedo: You know, without the "sexy." Ha.

Margilus: I didn't see that coming.

Albedo: Why don't you use a mirror like everyone else? Oh yea, that scar Jin gave you. Sorry.

Margilus: Would you STOP bringing that up?!

Albedo: What? The scar? Sure, I'll stop bringing up the topic of that scar.

Margilus: STOP IT.

Albedo: Can I talk about that ugly mark of own on your face, there?

Jin: Stop it, Albedo. You're gonna make him cry.
Albedo: Shut up and go carve off the rest of Margy's face.

-----------------------
Jr: Yea, I know.

Jr: I'm a one-man show.

Jr: The rest of you sit there, and watch me.

KOS-MOS: If it was possible, I'd delete you.

Shion: Lookit me, I'm an american smartie.

Junior: You're a candy?

Shion: *face on palm*
--------------------------------------------

[chaos and Allen are sitting on a bench together, at Durandal's park]

Allen: No matter what happens, she never shares her pain with anyone…
It's times like these when I'm reminded that I'm nothing but a
subordinate to her. I… I wish I could take her tears away… Maybe…
…someday.

chaos: You will…Allen, sometime.

Allen: That is what you think. You don't know anything about us…

[chaos simply looks at him]

Allen: Oh…I'm sorry… It's just… I didn't mean to say that…

chaos: We've only known each other for a short while…but I can see that
you have a good head and heart, Allen.

Allen: You are kind chaos…

chaos: Forgiveness…

[Albedo; who had been hiding in the bushes, suddenly jumps out to get behind the bench Allen and chaos had been sitting on]

Albedo: Uh oh! What is this!

chaos: OH MY GOD.

Albedo: Watch your mouth, Jesus.

Allen: I HATE YOU.

Albedo: Which is fine, because no one likes you.

chaos: I'm fed up with your antics, Albedo.

Albedo: C'mon and SMITE me already!

chaos: You're getting confused. God does the smiting, not Jesus.

Albedo: Well hell, I don't see you dying for my sins anytime soon--

Allen: I HATE YOU!

Albedo: --Unless you're scheduled to take a dive in the encelphlon!

[Allen begins sobbing]

------------------------------------------
HAIKU
Junior:
Angsty, stuck in the
Body of a small child-
Albedo haunts me.

Albedo:
I'll live forever
And taunt Rubedo until
He dies- I'm alone!

Gaignun:
I swear I'm older
In temperament, but I
Am also Yurie-

Albedo:
You need not tell me,
I know everything and all
And I am the next-

Junior:
You ran out of room!
But there is no need to tell-
I am not stupid!

T-ELOS:
So you say, but you
Have forgotten ME, the clue
To the final fight?!

Wilhelm:
The time is nigh, devils
While good and evil proceed
To conclude in tears.

Junior:
You know what,
you damn bitch?
Jump off a cliff.

Wilhelm:
As you younger ones say,
I have got thee;
Go away.

Junior:
*fumes and stomps off
in all his pint-sized
hot-headed glory*
----------------------------------------

Albedo: You can balance a teaset on my erection!

Albedo: Let's have tea! TEA PARTY AT ALBEDO'S!

Margulis: ….

Kirschwasser: Uh... I'll pass. I'm allergic.

Pellegri: I like my tea with milk.

Albedo: Well you're in luck, girlie! *pours tea*

Pellegri: Steady hand. What table's material is this?

Albedo: Wood.

Pellegri: Oh! You kids call it "olde school." There's nothing but those stupid plastic or metal ones these days.

Albedo: Uh... awkward. And how old are you anyway?
-----------------------------------------------

Albedo: Rubedo!

Jr.: Stop trying to lick me!

Albedo: Fine. Drop your pants and I'll drop mine.

Jr.: WHAT?!

Albedo: It's a MAN contest!

Jr.: Get out of here!

Shion: I'm just glad chaos isn't here. I'd hate to see you guys cry.

Gaignun: I have him on speed dial..

Jr.: You are all MEAN.
----------------------------------------------
Tony: chaos can't handle a martini!
chaos: *chokes* T_T Shut up.


Jr.: Alright let’s go take them out.

Shion: Wait!

Jr.: aaaarggh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Shion: I have a list of things I want to say to everyone before we leave. *cough* chaos you are a godly figure everyone adores.

Chaos: *bow*

Shion: Jin, I hate you.

Jin: *smile*

Shion: KOS-MOS is the best female in the universe.

KOS-MOS: *curtsey*

Shion: MOMO you are a pleasure to work with.

Jr.: *snicker*

Shion: WHAT?? WHAT????

Jr.: pleasure. Work with.

Shion: …. MOMO YOU ARE A GREAT PERSON-

Jr.: Realian

Shion: MOMO is cool.
MOMO: *fainted*

Shion: Ziggy is full of information; he is a great asset to have. *wipes tear*

Ziggy: I am?

Shion: Jr., you are bothersome. Okay thank you, thank you everyone!

Jr.: …That’s it?

Shion: Yes.

Jr.: No more…?

Shion: No.

Jr.: ….


Edit this Post | Delete this Post
 
 
 
18 November 2005 00:01 EST | Posted by games6/shiseiten

Jr: *stands in hallway*
Mary: *pokes Jr in the middle of his back*
Mary: It isn't a stickup, it's a very tall man!
Jr: *banshee wail*
Mary: AHHAHAHA KIDDING!


---------------------------------------------------
Shion: BIG BROTHER, MAKE JR. DO MORE THINGS
Shion: he's a real, JERK


---------------------------------------------------
Albedo: I KNOW SOMETHING YOU DON'T, CHILD >O
MOMO: Oh yeah? Like what?
Jr: *telepathic* You tell her and I'll KILL YOU.

Albedo: ... ... ... ... ...YOUR MOTHER'S A MORMON!
MOMO: My mother thinks Jr. is charming. *grumble noises*
Albedo: BECAUSE SHE'S A MORON!
Albedo: Er, Mormon.
MOMO: You insulted my mother!
Albedo: what else is new? Ziggy 'insults' her whenever you're not around.
Albedo: IF YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN WHICH YOU DON'T CHILD!
MOMO: I don't understand! Tell me!
Albedo: hey, ask Ziggy... ZIGGY, COME FIELD THIS QUESTION
Ziggy: No.
MOMO: *lower lip trembles* I wanna know!
Albedo: Fine, fine... what they do, is play PATTY CAKE.
Albedo: WITHOUT YOOOOOOOU!

-----------------------------------

MOMO: Hi, Junior!
Albedo: *is a little stunned*
MOMO: *backs away* whee hoo!
Albedo: I MISSED MY CHANCE
Ziggy: Uh, Jr.?
MOMO: What's that mean?
Albedo: examine Your Zipper.
MOMO: You need to learn how to eat with ice cream. You've gotten Vanilla ice creamm all over your pants!
Albedo: HAHAHAHA!!

----------------------------------------------

Albedo: *plays the cymbals*
MOMO: You are strange! Why are you playing the cymbals?
Albedo: So I don't have to hear the telepathic screams of my twin brother.
----------------------------------------
Albedo: TIME TO DROWN.
Albedo: *laughs*
Jr.: *screams*
Albedo: Okay, that's it. *bursts into the room* OKAY, YOU PROSTITUTES, BREAK IT UP!
Jr.: ALBEDO!!!
--------------------------------------------

chaos: *tele* What th?!
Albedo: *tele* No, not you, go away, Jesus.
-----------------------------------------------
MOMO: *cry*
Albedo: You look like you need a hug!
Ziggy: STEP OFF ALBEDO
Albedo: *picks MOMO up and hugs her*
MOMO: Let me GO!
Ziggy: Don't make me MOVE ZIG FOR GREAT JUSTICE.
Albedo: *doesn't listen* *licks MOMO's cheek*
MOMO: ! You're not a dog!
Ziggy: *tackles Albedo at his knees*
----------------------------------------------
KOS-MOS: SHION
KOS-MOS: *barges in a room* WHAT ABOUT MY AAAAARM?
KOS-MOS: YOU GOTTA FIX IT.
Jr.: She can do it later! We're having some alone time right now!
KOS-MOS: *rips off arm and throws it at him* NO.
KOS-MOS: *retrieves arm and begins hitting him with it* You are distracting Shion from her job, are you not?!
Jr: Ouch, ouch, you're hurting me! *passes out*
Shion: KOS-MOS!
KOS-MOS: He'll be fine. *wraps up Shion in a cover and leaves*
------------------------------------------------
Albedo: eeeeeeeee look at me i'm junior. *tosses on a trench coat and rolls around*
Jr.: Damn it ALBEDO!!
Albedo: Distrubedo is you.
Jr.: What!?
Albedo: DISRUBEDO!
Albedo: What's a good wordplay on my name?
Jr.: Stupid damn idiot jerk!!! Ahhhhh!! I don't even know what I am saying I'm so MAD!
Albedo: Hey! That's not nice!
---------------------------------------------
KOS-MOS: chaos..?
chaos: Yes?
KOS-MOS: *holds teddy bear* May I sleep in your bed tonight?

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30 October 2005 00:01 EDT | Posted by games6/shiseiten
No Manga This Week Sorry : /
I just came back from Japan. It's not too far where I live, which is Beijing China. :)

Oh oh! But I bought the Xenosaga2 ODM. Did you know that?
It explain about how Kevin could be the red testament! Unbelievable. Also, about Ziggy and Voyager but I think that is in his own game.

I never knew this, Jr.'s signature guns have history too and it is a little scary. (0.0)
One of them is from when Sakura committed suicide, he took it with him, and he uses it now.

The other is when he rescued Mary and Shelley 10 years ago in the lab in old miltia. He found a gun that look just like his other in the lab. He only had one that time, is that strange looking?
Mary was only a 10 year old girl and Shelley was 12. He heard of humans being tested in a lab from Helmar. Helmar rescued Nigredo and Rubedo 14 years ago of course and he had watched them until they build the foundation.
That's when they changed their names but I will get to that later. ^o^

4 years after Helmar took in Nigredo and Rubedo Helmar heard of humans being tested on Rubedo at 18, wanted to save them from something like that since he wanted no more people being tested like him and his brothers. Nigredo 16 at the time was too scared to take the mission.
"Rubedo, are you insane? You could get killed there."

"Ah, Nigredo. You are such a scardy cat. You know I'm not scared of some silly white coats. Besides what if something happens to those people? Like me?"

"Rubedo.."

Rubedo snuck out of Helmar's and went on his own, even though the Miltian Conflict was still in full. He broke in the lab with the silver gun the same one Sakura shot herself with and he killed many lab men. (is that against the law? (0_0) )

He found the chief at the laboratory and made him talk. The headmaster had said he took in two young girls that were sisters and erased their pasts. They had serial numbers instead of names. After Rubedo shot the headmaster in the leg and slipped away trying to find the girls, the headmaster crawled to an alarm.

"There's a kid with a long black coat (He wore that since he was 18? (0_0)) Invading the research. Commander Margulis, please send backup."

Rubedo found the girls in glass cages and shoot them open. The one with purple hair seemed unaffected the blonde one screamed,

"No! Are you here to finally encode us with the final test!!?"

Rubedo tried to tell her he was from the Federation Govt. working under Helmar. She said she didn't know what that was and thought he was lying.
The other girl believed him and stepped to his side.
The younger girl coward in the corner, scared.

"I promise, I really won't hurt you okay?"

"You look kind.. but you also hold something scary in your eyes. But I do think you are telling the truth now..."

Rubedo patted her on the shoulder as she stared in his eyes. "Wow.. you look like you hold an entire ocean!" Her sister and him both laughed and then he asked,
"What is your name, kid?"

"I...I have no name. But if you want to call me something I am Subject: 39057. My sister is Subject: 39058"

"...I know what that feels like. Don't worry I'm going to get the both of you out of here were you will be safe and loved. And you will no longer be referred to as a number.”

“If what you say is true Mr., then you are my angel!”

“Hey don’t call me Mr. it makes me sound old!”

“Hehehe. Well you have not told me your name, Mr.”

“Ugh. Well anyway, the name’s Rubedo.”

“Okay then, Rubedo. Thank you so much for coming here.”

The sister then interrupted them making a low noise as a man in a purple uniform came closer to them.

“So you are the rat that came in for the leftovers, eh? Very well, I shall eliminate you for causing such atrocities in the U-TIC lab.”

“Who the hell are you?”

The blonde sister tugged on Rubedo’s coat.

“Rubedo. That’s the man that helped the others with our tests!”

Margulis soon jumped forward at them three. Rubedo shoved the girls back in a corner and took out his pistol. Margulis dodged every bullet and Rubedo soon had no ammo left to fire. The blonde sister saw this and became fearful so spotted a gun on the floor across the room. She crawled over to get it, calling Rubedo’s name she flung it at him. He saw it looked exactly like his other, but had no time to marvel it. The fight lasted long but Rubedo had gotten Margulis in the arm. Margulis escaped, setting off a self destruct bomb in the lab.


The younger sister cried and screamed unwilling to move. Rubedo became enraged and pistol whipped her.

“Shut up!” She cried out and fainted, making the other hold her hands to her face.

“I…I’m sorry I didn’t mean to she just…”

“Is she still alive? That is all I want to know.”

“Of course… I mean I didn’t want to do that I just get so angry..”

The other sister said nothing and began to question whether or not he was a friend or foe. Rubedo picked up the younger sister and ran out minutes before the building exploded. Making it back to Helmar’s, he told everything about the two girls. Helmar soon took them too under his care. The next day, Rubedo went to check on them, the younger one regained conscious and looked well despite still in her test subject robe.

“You! You hurt me!” The young one wailed inching away from him.

“I told your sister that I said I was sorry. But you were being exasperating at the time. And keeping a cool mind is what you need to have in order to survive. I may not be that old but even at 18 I have seen many things in my life at this point. It’s best for you not to question it.”

“18…?”

“Anyway, I still haven’t got a name for you two yet.”

“We have name-“

“Proper names.”

“Will you name us?”

“I have a good idea what it may be. You, little one, will be Mary.”

“Mary?”

“In the Bible, the virgin Mary had saved many lives. You had saved mine the lab. I think it fits you.”

The young one was overjoyed and jumped up to hug Rubedo.

“My name is… Mary.”

“That’s right. And your sister… I knew from the start that she will be Shelley. Besides Mary Shelley is an author I had read from recently.”

It explains more about how Mary and Shelley adapt to their new environment, and 4 years later Helmar has decided that Nigredo and his brother should start their own life at the beginning of Nigredo’s 20th birthday. He began to fund them a foundation and gave Nigredo and Rubedo a fictional persona of the surname Kukai. Then no one would know they were once weapons, right?
Helmar also stated that they could have a battleship, in any design they wanted. Rubedo and Nigredo still thought their names sounded funny with the surname Kukai instead of Yuriev.

“Rubedo what do you think our new names should be?”

“Tch, I don’t know. Don’t you have any thoughts?”

“Remember our cat?”

“The one father killed with rat poison since we weren’t allowed to have pets?”

“Yes. Gaignun. I believe I want to be Gaignun. Gaignun Kukai.”

“That does sound pretty cool. But what about me?”

“I do not know.”

Rubedo walked along the newly made streets of his foundation deep in thought. 14 year old Mary saw him walking alone and joined him.

“Hello Rubedo, why are you looking sad?”

“Oh it’s nothing.”

“Well Rubedo’s never sad. He’s always happy! So I must know!”

Rubedo couldn’t resist her child like wonder and told her what the problem was.
Oh oh, I forgot to mention that Mary and Shelley both know why he never ages. Even though now he is 22.

“Gaignun Kukai… and… umm..”

“See told you it’s hard to name me.”

“Junior.”

“What?”

“Junior! I think you should be named Junior!”

“Junior? What are you saying? That sounds like something you’d call your dog!”

“Hehehe well I got it because, you are short and you look young!”

“Hmm...”

“You are also smaller than Nigredo. Gaignun… Kukai Ju…nior. Gaignun Jr.!”

“You make it sound like I would be his child or somethin’”

“That is it! I have a perfect idea!”

The following day, Mary told Helmar and Gaignun about her plan. They agreed to it without Rubedo’s consent. Creating him a new birthday certificate and ID.

“What the hell did you just do Nigredo!?”

“Helmar was the one that did all the paper work.”

“I don’t give a damn! I had no say in this to play as your son!”

“It is the only way we can get around for now… don’t you understand.”

“I will not be called Junior! I refuse. And I will not act as your son!”

“Who said you had to act as one? Only the public will be oblivious. The people we will gather in the foundation may know but no one else. It will not be that hard for you.”

The following year Rubedo finally gave in to his new name and position. (Owning a foundation and ship can’t be that bad right? ^o^) He became captain of the ship which he called Durandal everyone looked up to him and soon came to an analogy to call him Little Master. Rubedo hesitated at it at first, but soon got use to it. Mary and Shelley where jobless and young teenagers, Rubedo cared for them deeply so decided to give them high status on his ship.

“Rubedo, we tried to get jobs on Second Miltia but they will not accept us without a resume… and we can’t go around saying we were once te-“

“Okay okay I understand that. How about this, since I care a lot for the both of you, you can work on my new ship, how’s that?”

“Truly!?”

“Yeah! But you can’t just lounge around, you have to do work!”

“I..I understand. I don’t know how to work though…”

“I’ll give you something easy, Mary. You can be second commander that way, you can boss around people when I’m not around. I’m pretty sure it will be a fitting job for a 15 year old.”

“Oh thank you!”

“Shelley, you are highly intelligent and since that, you could be the navigator and give me the statuses.

“Yes. I could do that.”

That is all I have translated so far for the XS2ODM. That section is really long and has dialogue as you can tell. I know it don’t look like it describes anything that is because I had a hard time changing Japanese to English, but I might revise it. I hope I can finish it soon; I have to get the manga done too! So sorry about my English it is my 3rd language.

This is Jia Ming singing off

 

 

 

 


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18 October 2005 00:01 EDT | Posted by games6/shiseiten

KOS-MOS: The Zohar emulators are malfunctioning.
Jr.: Reminds me of 14 years ago--
Shion: JUNIOR! *exits stage right*
Jr.: That's it, I need a spinoff series!

-----------------------------------------------


SHION: Why are we all still single?

ALBEDO: Because we're all freaks of nature?

SHION: YOU three got that excuse going for you. I don't.

ALBEDO: You don't know that!

JR: Jin would know.

SHION: Leave him out of this...
------------------------------------------
MOMO: Ziggy, wanna play dress up?

Ziggy: I'm sorry MOMO, I have too much dignity for that.
------------------------------------------------

Jr.:Hey, why’s you name chaos.Your so quiet and calm, what’s so chaotic about you?

chaos: I’m not wild enough for you, is that it?

Jr.: Well, yeah. I think someone named chaos should be…well, causing chaos! And why don’t you capitalize your name?

chaos: I see. I’m too old and boring to be of any use

Jr.: That's not what I meant!

chaos: No. I understand. From now on, I shall be Chaos! With a capital C!

-------------------------------------------
MOMO: Look! It’s chaos! Hi chaos!

chaos: It's not chaos it's Chaos!

MOMO: Isn't that the same thing?

chaos: NO! *dumps tomotoe juice on Shion's hair*

Shion: Aiieeya!! My hair!! It's red and gross!!!

Jr.: *glaring daggers*

Shion: .... It looks nice on you though.

Jr.:...Thanks alot.

-----------------------------------------------
Shion: 1...2...3...

Everyone else: SURPRISE!

Jr.: OH boy! A surprise party! You guys did remember!

Shion: Uh, yeah…

[Jr. suddenly noticed that the ‘balloons’ were actually plastic bags]

Jr.: This is…great.

Ziggy: [flatly] Here's your gifts.

[A stick of gum,a cactus, a half empty can of shaving cream]

Jr.: [hiding dissapointed] Thanks guys…just what I always wanted..

Shion: Now we can play the age old game of pin the tail on the donkey!

Jr.: What? Do I look like a child to you?

Ziggy: Actually... uh,

chaos: No of course not!

Jin: Would you like some cake?

[places it in front of JR. it says "happy brithday Jr.!"]

Jr.: Um.. you spelled birthday wrong.

Jin: ...

Allen: Chief I lo- [siren sound]

Shion: I wonder where that came from.. what did you say, Allen?

Allen: I-

Jr.: OOWWW!

Shion: What happened?

Jr.: The damn cactus bit me!

Shion: It... bit you?

KOS-MOS:It is highly unlikely a cactus will have teeth. In fact, records show that they no longer exist.

[SHION picks it up.. it had a tiny row of teeth.]

Jin: Such things happen, yes? Jr., try some of your cake! I was really happy making it!

Jr.: eh..

Jin: Go on.. it won't bite!

Jr.: Yeah they said that about the cactus too. [takes a bit, spits it on Ziggy]

Jr.: Ew? What the hell flavour is this!? Mud?

Jin: Well.. actually-

Shion: Hhahahaha very funny Jin. Yes hehe. *blush*
-------------------------------------------------

Albedo: You're just --ow-- mad because -- dammit! -- YOU had to pay for the hotel room!

Shion: Don't make me use a heel!

Shion: KOS-MOS, gimme your shoes!!

Jr: You are in for it now...

Albedo: *runs*

KOS-MOS: *walks in* ROAR.

Albedo: AAAHHH!!! SAVE ME MOMO!!!

--------------------------------------
Canaan: Jr. shaves his legs, pass it on!

Jin: psst. MOMO. Jr shaves his legs. Pass it on.

MOMO: Psst, chaos, Jr. shaves his legs pass it on.

chaos: Shion. Jr shaves his legs, pass it on.

Shion: What!? I already did. Oh fine, KOS-MOS, Jr. shaves his legs, pass it on.

KOS-MOS: I have no need for gossip. But to humour you, I will "pass it on."

KOS-MOS: Wilhelm, Gaignun Kukai Jr. removes hair from his legs. Please alert the proper authorities.

Wilhelm: Kev- Red Testament, Gaignun Kukai Jr., captain of the Durandal belonging to the Kukai Foundation, appears to shave his legs. Please pass this on as you see fit.

Kevin: Virgi-- er, Blue Testament, Rubedo shaves his legs. Alert that twin brother of his...

Virgil: Hey White Testi- Albedo, your twin, Rubedo shaves his lil legs. I'd eat him if he was a Realien!

Albedo: my darling Kirshwassers! it appears that Rubedo also enjoys humanlike behavior. Shaving his legs, indeed! now you should run amok with that bit of information, yes? *mad grin*

Kirshwasser: Marguilis, My master Albedo's brother, Rubedo shaves his legs... please... tell someone... about this....

Marguilis: PELLIGRI! Alert Juli Mizrahi Cause she's really evil. Tell her Gaignun Kukai Jr shaves his legs! And tell her to pass it on!

Pelligri: Yes my sex slav- Marguilis. Juli, Gaignun Kukai Jr. shaves his legs when no one's lookin'! Please pass this on for gossips sake!

Juli: Helmer, you won't believe this! Gaignun Kukai's illigitnamite! son/clone/whatever shaves his legs. you MUST tell someone!!

Helmer: Wow now this sure is funny!!!! Hey Nigredo, your older brother shaves his legs! I bet he does it in the shower! Pass this on!

Gaignun ...ZIGGY! Jr shaves his legs. Pass it on... and tell him I want to speak with him about this.

Ziggy: Allen, it appears that Jr. shaves his legs. I find this funny, yet I can't show emotion because I'm a "hardend soldier" Please pass this on... oh, and tell Jr. Gaignun wants to see him.

Allen: *bursts into some room without knocking* HEY MARY! oh hi Jr... Mary, quit kneeling like that! Anyway, JUNIOR SHAVES HIS LEGS. oh, and Jr., Gaignun wants to talk to you about that...

Mary: *rolls over, blushes, and runs to tell Shelly*

Jr.: *zips his pants* THE HELL!? Can't you see I'm busy!!?

Mary: *runs into yet another room without knocking* GAIGNUN! Is Shelley underneath your desk picking up pencils again? Cuz I gotta tell her something. Oh well I can't wait. JR SHAVES HIS LEGS, SHELLEY. Tell Gaignun when you're finished, and pass it on, too. *runs off*

Gaignun: Oh my! *pulls up slacks*

Shelley: *coughs* Okay... I'll be sure to pass it around...all 100 series, Little Master shaves his legs. Pass it on to whoever you see first.

random 100-series: Tony, Little Master shaves his legs. Tell a member of your crew thanks.

Tony: Littler Master saves his legs, Hammer. Pass it on, duuuude!!!!!

Hammer: nothing wrong with tha-- I mean I'll tell Mathews. Mathews, Little Master shaves his legs. With Venus razor, if he's smart. Pass it on.

Matthews: Ya moron... okay I'll tell the droids. Hey droid, Little Master shaves his legs cause he's a whimp and can't handle being a man. *pulls up pants leg, hair everywhere* Pass this on.

Droid: random Gnosis, the entity known as Jr. shave his legs because he's not manly or something. Pass it on.

Gnosis: Cherenkov ghost, Jr. shaves his legs because he isn't a human male, and appears to be female. pazz it on.

Cherenkov: Hey... Jr shaves his legs, Shion's friend Miyuki?. Pass it on.

Miyuki: Okay, Handsome. Hey Togashi, Some guy named Jr. shaves his legs. Isn't that hysterical!? *bites an apple* and I lost 5 pounds! Pass both these on

Togashi: hmm... hey, random fellow Vector employee! Jr shaves his legs; tell someone.

Vector guy: Hey, Lt. Vanderkaum, yeah you with the purple X on your face. Jr. shaves his legs, he's a slacker, punch him. oh, pass it on.

Lt. Vanderkaum: Junior! You shave your leeeegs. *punch*

Jr.: What the! Ow that hurt! I do not shave me legs, I am naturally HAIRLESS for your information. Who the hell started this!?

Canaan: *looks away*

Jin: *cough*


Edit this Post | Delete this Post
 
 
 
13 October 2005 00:01 EDT | Posted by games6/shiseiten

-----------------------------------------------

Yuriev: "I need to hijack this thread here. "Rubee666," go to bed. I know that's you. It's 3 in the freakin' morning."

Young Rubedo: AW DAMN.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Jr: *On an instant message service* That you on the camera, KOS-MOS?
KOS-MOS: Affirmative. 'Lo there.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Ziggy - I'm not important enough to get my own quote.

---------------------------------------------
Shelley: Is it ready yet?
Mary: Mm, it's coming..
Jr.: eh!?
Mary: The pizza delivery, duhh
Jr.: Stop teasing me!

-----------------------------------------------

*flames fly around our lovely cast with huge earthquakes, ether powers and everything you can think of*

Wilhelm: HAHAHA! I got you! I got you!

Jr: nope.

Wilhelm: drat.
----------------------------------------------------
Jr.: Guns don't kill people; I do.
----------------------------------------------------
Shion: Jr.....

Jr.: Yeah?

Shion: Hi.

--------------------------------------
Jr.: "Geez, what's wrong with you? MOMO, are you mad?"

MOMO: "I'm not mad. It's more of a..." *these faces show up on the text*(^_^) (>_<) (O_O)

MOMO: "...you know?"

Jr.: "No. Now stop making stupid faces, go upstairs in your room and think about what you have done!"

MOMO: "Okay!"

----------------------------------------------

*Jr. goes up to the Durandal’s bridge, finding dead bodies of Mary, Shelley, and the big burly man from Vol. 1.*

Jr.: Shelley! Mary! What's the matter!?

*There in front of him he saw chaos, standing above the body of the burly man. Blood soaked the carpets, walls, glass, control panels, chairs, etc*

Chaos: Welcome;Jr.

Jr.: Hey, that's the guy who stole all my stuff THANK YOU CHAOS! Now the ship is mine again!

Chaos: What!?"What is this!? This HAPPINESS!? My body is weakening! "YOU FOOL! Let me go!

[chaos brought a leg up and kneed Jr. in the family jewels. Gasping for air, Jr. fell to the groundclutching his uh family jewels..I suppose.]

Jr.: Ow chaos;I think you broke them...

Chaos: Now, foolish mortal.. Prepare to submit to my every whim

Jr.: chaos, you really don't

Chaos: Shut up, Jr.! I am displeased.

Jr.: Well that'ds very out of character for you.
You're usually never displeased.

Chaos: Silence! You have no power HERE, Jr. All POWER is MINE!

Jr.: You know, you're beginning to sound like Albedo.

Chaos: Enough! I am angered! *a blood geyser spurts from underneath the floor causing Jr. to jump back.*

Jr.:*casually* So I see.

Chaos: I'll defeat you and the universe will know my name for finally slaying you!

Jr.: Yeah, I heard the same exact thing from about 200 or so other villains.

Chaos: No they were only pawns! This is where you face your ultimate death!

Jr.: Heard that too. *yawn*

Chaos: ...

Jr.: Done yet? I'm late for a meeting.

Chaos: Corpses! Arise and serve me! [As if things couldn't get any worse, all of the corpses of the Realians, Mary, and the big burly man became animate and melded together to become somebloody gooey nasty looking toxic stuff]

Jr.: Ya know, too much red really gives that murderous look to the Durandal, chaos. And really, with all that blood, I can't see out the windows. Can we reschedule for a paint job? I was thinking more along the lines of a mural with a certain handsome and daring red haired charmer as the cynosure.

Chaos: SILENCE! There will be no murals featuring YOU!

Jr.: Shucks.

Chaos: NOW how do you think you can stand against me?

*Blinking, Jr. turned and went down on the lift.*
Chaos: Huh? HEY! You're not allowed to leave! That's CHEATING!

-------------------------------------------------
5 year reunion (?)

Jr.: I got a kid now. Name's Jessie.

Shion: Aww I bet she's cute!

Jr.: Er "he"

Shion: ..........

MOMO: What about me?

Jr.: What about you?

MOMO: I'm your child! I feel so forgotten!

Ziggy: MOMO Come back here!

MOMO: Waaah!

Ziggy: I'm your surrogate father, now come back!

Jr.: She never gives it up!

--------------------------------------------------
Albedo: no what. YOU'RE ALSO USELESS LIKE A BARREN WOMAN. Now go cry with MOMO. She needs company.

Shion: Waaaaaaaaaah!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *runs*

----------------------------------------------------
Gaignun: I believe you have my soap?

KOS-MOS: Negative.

Shion: YOU LIE

Shion: KOS-MOS, give it back to the nice man.

KOS-MOS: Shion, I like the soap *juggles it*

Shion: KOS-MOS bad bad girl!

Gaignun: ...I'll just use the handsoap It's okay... really.

Jr.: *walks in* NO! She must be punished!

KOS-MOS: Inferior being, please stand down unless you wish to face the ultimate death.

Shion: Now, now, play nice.

Jr.: If you don't stop, I'll have to stop you!

Gaignun: LET ME SHOWER IN PEACE!!!

MOMO: *walks in* candy, where? I like those. *sees Gaignun* Aiiiyaa

Jr.: No! I'm here to settle the score. Bring it, android.

Shion: Stop it! Just stop it! *whine whine*

KOS-MOS: *drops soap on floor*

Jr.: *trips on it*

KOS-MOS: Gaignun Kukai, there is your soap back in your place.

Gaignun: ...
------------------------------------------------
MOMO: I can't reach the countertop

Shion: stand on Jr's shoulders!

MOMO: MEN COOTIES!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ziggy: Hello.

MOMO: MORE MEN COOTIES!

Ziggy: Only 15% Men Cooties.

Kos-mos: do not forget Gaignun.

Gaignun: *still in the shower* WHAT?

chaos: and me!

*silence*

chaos: aww..

-------------------------------------------------

Jr.: I don't feel welcome.

Shion: Well, what are we supposed to do?!

Gaignun: *whisper*

Shion: ...I'm not doing that!

Chaos: Do it. Go on.
----------------------------------------------------

Jr.: SHION!

Shion: *in shower* Huh?

-------------------------------------------

Margulis: You will fear me! Zombie power!

Jin: Eeeyah! *ice powers*

Jr.: Oi!

Margulis: Feared?

Jr.: No.

Margulis: why?!

Jr.: Because, well, you say you're a zombie, and yet, you don't have the gruesome, rotted, nauseating appearance of one. If you are a zombie, you're one sorry-ass zombie. You have a bad haircut and a horrible fashion sense, but that's not enough to make a grown man piss his pants.

Margulis: Hmm...Good point. I'm not a very good zombie. Would you fear me as a cyborg?

Jr.: No.

Margulis: Will you fear me as a regular man?

Jr.: You aren't a regular man. You're not even an extremely psychotic and deranged man.

Margulis: *huff puff*

-----------------------------------------------
[CHAT ROOM - JIN enters]
jin: hello, room.
canaan: ping rubedo? ping nigreado?
jin: no but i have porn y data.
chaos: sweet!
[Canaan has signed off]
chaos: it crashed again!


Edit this Post | Delete this Post
 
 
 
12 October 2005 00:01 EDT | Posted by games6/shiseiten

[ Jr. waltzed into the Elsa. He looked to both his sides, checked the deck, below, and even above. All to no avail.]

JR.: Where the hell did everyone go? Did... did the apocalypse happen? [Falls too his knees in despair] NO! NOOOOOOOOOOOOO! Why must I always be so alone!

PROFESSOR: Excuse me, would you quiet down!

[Jr. paused to look at the Professor then cried back at the sky.]

JR.: Why do you torture me still, cruel fate!

[Jr.turned around only to be face and chest with chaos.]

CHAOS: Hello Junior, everyone’s gone on a day off.

JR.: Oh man! You’re so slow you haven’t even made it out the door yet. I guess you’ll have to do.

CHAOS: Do what?

JR.: Well, today was really deliberate. Gaignun said I should go out and do something, but there’s no one to do anything with! MOMO is being baby-sitted, Tony and Hammer have the day off, Allen and Shion are MIA, and everyone in the foundation is doing work, work, work.

CHAOS: Oh, well I’m not doing anything today.
[chaos has with a warm smile. And Jr. rolls his eyes.]

JR.: Okay, okay. Where should we go? The Elsa’s docked on Second Miltia, so keep your boundaries in there.

CHAOS: Oh, I choose? Okay then...hmm... I believe that a new art museum has opened in the 2nd District. Shall we go there?

JR.: Ugh fine, as long as it doesn’t suck.

CHAOS: Well, where do you want to go?

JR.: Huh? What are you talking about?

CHAOS: Well, the art museum is pretty small, it shouldn’t take us more than half the remaining parts of the day to see all the sights.

JR.: Okaaaaay...well that’s perfect, I heard tonight they’re going to be a carnival in the First District. Rides, candy, games, the old fashioned works!

[With agreement, they left professionally. (?)]
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

[At Proto Merkabah before the fight with the Gnosis]

Jr.: Damn it... We have to destroy this thing first!

Ziggy: Right, this takes priority.

chaos: Be careful, everyone! That's no longer just a machine!

Shion: All right! Let's do it, KOS-MOS!

KOS-MOS: Affirmative. Switching to maximum output for all combat systems. [her eyes turn blue] But before we combat...Do I look okay?

Everyone [including Gnosis]: [falls over]
----------------------------------------------------------------------
KOS-MOS: Gaignun Kukai Jr. hurry and press circle

Jr.: What?

KOS-MOS: Press circle so I can use my special attack

Jr.: What!?

KOS-MOS: Never mind your brain patterns do not comprehend my question please disregard it.

GAME OVER


[On the Durandal ]

Jr: [whistles and walks by the Residential Area]

chaos: KOS-MOS, are you sure that's wise?

KOS-MOS: Yes, it is very essential.

Jr: What the? [presses ear against door]

KOS-MOS: It is dangling right there...

chaos: Oh? Where?

KOS-MOS: Approximately right here...

Jr: (HUH?!)

chaos: Here, let me fix that.

KOS-MOS: Is it supposed to bend that way?

chaos: I don't know either.

Jr: ….

KOS-MOS: I am almost there...!

chaos: Yes! Keep going!

Jr: (That's IT!) [bashes in] AHHHHHH... ha?

[KOS-MOS and chaos are doing origami]

chaos: Oh, hey Jr.

KOS-MOS: We have just completed a red dragon sumo wrestling with a yellow tiger.

Jr: B-But I thought...

----------------------------------------------
KOS-MOS: Gaignun?

Gaignun: *in the shower* What!?
---------------------------------------------

Random 100 Series: Little Captain!

Jr.: Bleh.

100 Series: Aaaww..
---------------------------------------------

MOMO: *picks a wedgie*

---------------------------------------------
Shion: Where's Jr.? I wanna kick him in the nuts.
--------------------------------------------------
Shion: KOS-MOS is coming with us!

Chaos: Great!

Jr.: Again!?

Shion: What do you mean AGAIN?

Jr.: Look at her, I get embarrassed walking around with an android that looks like a frail super model!

KOS-MOS: I am built stronger than I look, Shion Uzuki gave me a female build because…. *searches her database* Data not found. But in fact, I am stronger than 50 muscle bond men put together.

Jr.: So you like it rough, eh?
----------------------------------------------------

Tony: *Takes a sip out of a bottle of milk* Aw God, we'd better get new milk, this stuff's sour.

Shion: Hahaha!

Jr: Haha

Chaos: *giggle*

Tony: What?

Shion: That milk is sour because it came from my left breast!

Tony: ……..*Vomits*
---------------------------------------------
KOS-MOS: Knock knock

Shion: Who's there?

KOS-MOS: KOS-MOS

Shion: KOS-MOS who?

KOS-MOS: R cannon

Shion: HAHHAHHHAAHA

KOS-MOS: HAHAHAHHAHAHAH
---------------------------------------------------
Jr: Cookies, anyone?
---------------------------------------------------

MOMO: Meow! *Lies on back craving a belly rub*
-------------------------------------------------

Jr: WHO INVITED YOU!? *pulls out gun* YOU WEREN'T INVITED WERE YOU!?
Canaan: ..... Helmer told me to go to Old Miltia also... *looks down*
Jr: Oh... Ha ha.. Yeah! Haha...*walks out*
----------------------------------------------------

Jr: Okay, on the count of three.....1, 2, 5!

chaos: Three, Jr, three!

Jr: Oh! 3!

-----------------------------------------------

Shion: Nii-san, please!
Stop going backwards on the escalator...!

Jin: Hahahahaha

Shion: How embarrassing...

Jin: No, no. It's incredibly fun, Shion.

------------------------------------------------
Jr.: I'm gonna make you SQUEAL like a pig.
MOMO: What are you doing to Alby?
Mary and Shelley: …………

-------------------------------------------------
Shion: *snicker*

Chaos: *snicker*

MOMO: *snicker*

Jr.: What’s so damn funny?

Ziggy: *snicker*

KOS-MOS: *snicker*

Jr.: WHAT!?

MOMO: *puts to his back*

Jr.: *feels around rips off a post-it looking note* *note: Jin’s loving property don’t touch without permission*

Everyone: HAHAHAHAHA!

Jr.: Hara guzhuchi o tataku na!!! ( I didn’t know how to translate this right but it roughly means “Shut the F____ up. ^___^;;;)
--------------------------------------------------

Jin: Slide ~~~~~

Shion: Nii-san!!

Sign: Ormus Stronghold
21:05

Jin: Hahahahaha Slide ~~~~

Text: Slope

Jin: If you look at me out of the corner of your eye, doesn't it look like I'm standing straight up?

Shion: Yes!


Edit this Post | Delete this Post
 
 
 
3 October 2005 00:01 EDT | Posted by games6/shiseiten

This was in the volume two manga and…it doesn’t make sense. I got it from my trip in Japan though I think it made it worthwhile. This is only part one and really, it makes no sense. I didn’t warn you! the (?) means I do not think I translated it right.

[Intro]

Albedo: Mwhaha

JR: Go away. Your last name isn't Kukai.

KOS-MOS: I recommend that you shut up!

 


[Durandal]

[Jr.’s dormitory (?) NIGHT]

**SHION UZUKI barges she’s looking distraught, and noisy. Jr., who was asleep in front of the television, is startled awake and instantly cranky.

JR: Will there ever be a morning where you DON'T come storming in here?

SHION: Actually, it's night.

JR: [points to an alarm clock] It's three in the morning!

SHION: Whatever. Dark is dark.

**SHION plops down next to JR on the couch, but not without first raiding his fridge for mochi. It's cherry vanilla. (?).

JR: Oh, no. The mochi. What happened?

SHION: I [gulp] mumble [bite] len. [Dives in box]

JR: What?

SHION: I know, it's horrible.

JR: Er... what did you say? I couldn't hear you.

**It becomes apparent that SHION can't hear him either. She doesn't repeat herself, only continues eating and ranting at the same time. JUNIOR, at a loss on what to do, simply puts his arms around her.

JUNIOR: Er, there, there. It's gonna be alright... yup.

 


[Durandal Jr.’s dormitory (?)- DAY]

**SHION is much calmer now, but drinking natto (eeww) from a cup. JR paces the living room waiting for GAIGNUN KUKAI.

SHION: Where are you two going, anyway?

JR: [trying to be macho] Man's stuff.

SHION: [frank] He's giving you a ride to your doctor's appointment?

JR: [macho deflates] ...Yeah.

SHION: I guess it’s hard being stuck in a kid's body.

JR: Why do women feel the need to consume food when they're down?

SHION: Why do women give birth?

JR: Now what does that have to do with--

SHION: It's like birth. It's just there. It's best not to question it.

JR: You make no sense.

SHION: [slurping] You say that because you're a man. You just don't get it.

JR: Again with the Male Bashing.

SHION: I don't do it much. Feel lucky.

**JUNIOR scowls anime style in her general direction.

SHION: It's true.

JR: What?

SHION: What I just said.

JR: Oh, the Women's Tao (?) thing that you tried to lay on me?

SHION: [suddenly thoughtful] Women's Tao... never thought of it that way.

**Before JUNIOR could chase the thought out of her mind, the buzzer sounds. He paces toward the door and peers into the peephole (?). Seeing that it's GAIGNUN KUKAI, he lets him in.

SHION: Women's Tao... Interesting.

JR: Shion, don't read into it.

GAIGNUN: What? Women's Tao? [looks toward Shion] natto! My favorite.
JR: it’s about time! How are you?

GAIGNUN: [distant] Nothing doing. (? Don’t know how to translate it it turned out funny. hahaha)

**GAIGNUN walks into the kitchen, grabs a straw from the straw-holders, and joins SHION in slurping up the last of the natto.

SHION: I'm not sharing. Shoo!

**GAIGNUN get shoo'ed (?) away eventually, after the last slurp.

JR: Sheesh. The both of you.

GAIGNUN: I'm hungry. I couldn't help but notice it, Shion. Junior, what happened?

JR: [not knowing] Er... ah... something depraved. We go now, yeah?

**JUNIOR tries to push GAIGNUN out the door. He wants to leave, but SHION stops him with a wave of her hand.

SHION: Yea. And you know what? Junior's a great friend. He just sat there and listened to me and held me...

GAIGNUN: [glare] Support sex?!

JR: Eh!? No sex, Gaignun. Don't look at me like that!

SHION: [ignoring] ...And supported me. Although... [deep anime style breath] I slept with Allen.

JR: [indifferent] Yea, I'm so great like that. I also gave you my mochi.

SHION: I owe you.

JR: You ate the whole thing!

SHION: I do feel pretty bad about it...

**SHION walks over and gives JR a giant hug. It's only now that the full force of her words finally registered on JR.

SHION: Thank you soooooooooooo much for understanding and still being my friend although I--

JR: [finishing] You slept with Allen!

SHION: You sound surprised.

JR: I should be. You slept with Allen!

Gaignun: [disapproving] Co-worker, no less. (?)

SHION: Wait wait wait. You were so understanding last night!

JR: [hastily] This morning.

SHION: Whatever. What gets me is that you weren't listening to me!

JR: I just couldn't hear you! You had mochi all in your mouth.

SHION: You could've asked me to repeat it!

JR: I did! What gets me is that you weren't listening to me!

SHION: I couldn't hear you! I had mochi all in my mouth.

JR: You could've swallowed it!

GAIGNUN: Bad visual…

SHION: [sob] I feel bad again!! I need food.

**JUNIOR also balks at the mental image of ALLEN with SHION. SHION glares at the two Kukai brothers. And slowly edges toward the kitchen again.

JR: Ah, Shion?

**SHION begins pulling things out of the shelves, and not finding any cookies or other sweets to drown her pain in, she returns to the fridge.

JR: [alarmed] Shion... what are you doing?

SHION: [cold] There's no cookies. You health nut. I'm getting more mochi.

JR: But I don't have anymore!!

**Relentless, she plows on through the freezer, and, finding no mochi, proceeds onto the fridge's crisper. (?)

SHION: Well, I'll just have to take something else, don't I?

JR: No, not that!

**SHION pulls out a package of seafood. Precooked Salmon. JUNIOR is freaked.

JR: Are you insane, woman!? That's for my dinner party tonight.

SHION: Heehee rough for you.

JR: Do you have any idea how much that thing cost?!

SHION: What? Can't hear yoooou.

JR: Oh come on!

SHION: You should've thought of that before you faked that hug last night.

JR: This morning! You keep saying "last night" like we slept together!

GAIGNUN: Whoa!!!

SHION: [enraged] Shush! You're so anal. When it's dark out, it's dark out.

**SHION leaves in a huff, taking the prized salmon with her. JUNIOR turns his attention toward a largely (?) silent GAIGNUN. Wary of this sudden shift of focus, GAIGNUN moves to clean up the kitchen.

JR: Get the hell out my kitchen. Did you see all that?! Geez, girls.

GAIGNUN: Well, at least you didn't “you know” with her…. Or did you!?

JR: [hurls a random cup in GAIGNUN'S direction] Shut up. Let's go. I need to pick up another salmon.

 


[VECTOR INDUSTRIES- establishing (?)]

MIYUKI (V.O.): You did what?!

[VECTOR INDUSTRIES- hallway- DAY]

**SHION and her colleague, MIYUKI, are walking through the hallway toward the break room for lunch. SHION is sharing the salmon package with her while walking.

MIYUKI: Were you, drunk?

SHION: Er, no...

MIYUKI: Lonely? Desperate?

SHION: No and no! Geez.

MIYUKI: [whining] Then why? Why did you sleep with the Durandal commander (?) of all people!!

SHION: I don't know! Wait, I mean I didn’t! Aiya! Leave me alone. Don't you have asses (?) to kiss?

MIYUKI: Don't you have subordinates to bang? (?)

**Both laugh.

SHION: This is why I like you. Want some more salmon?

**As they both enter the breakroom, a screech of SHION's name fills the air. It's ALLEN.

ALLEN: Chieeeeeeeef!

SHION: Oh my!

ALLEN: Chief! After you left my apartment last night without a word I tried calling everyone at work and I couldn't find you and I was worried that you got attacked by a Gnosis and--

SHION: Allen! People can hear you.

MIYUKI: Doesn't matter, they know. Weren't you listening? He called everyone at work looking for you.

**SHION is dumbfounded.

SHION: Miyuki... why didn't you tell me?

MIYUKI: Don't have a cell, remember? That's how the government tracks you.

ALLEN: [whine] You really shouldn't leave your phone anywhere.

SHION: [still in shock] H-h-h-how did you get everyone's number?!

ALLEN: Your address book. On your phone.

SHION: You went through my address book?!

ALLEN: It was a state of emergency!

MIYUKI: You tried calling her house?!

ALLEN: Yea, but... no one answered. What did you do? Go drinking?

SHION: No, I went over to Juni-- [catches self]

ALLEN: You went where?

SHION: [hastily] No, no, I went drinking. Nevermind.

MIYUKI: You just said Jun--

SHION: [strong] Drinking!

**Silence.

MIYUKI: Er... you know what, guys? I have to go to the doctor's today. [reassuringly hugs Shion] I'll let you handle this. Call me, okay?

SHION: Call you with what? This fool has my phone.

ALLEN: [beaming] You can come over tonight and get it.

SHION: Er... Miyuki, you don't have a phone of any sort, anyway.

MIYUKI: "Call me" is an expression for "take me to the coffee shop and talk my ear off." Toodles.

**MIYUKI exits.

ALLEN: ...Could we go sit down somewhere? We've been standing in the doorway. And everyone's staring at us.

SHION: [mumble] Glaring's more like it.

**Both move over to the tables. The rest of the employees are staring. One of which happens to be WILHELM, the owner of Vector.

SHION: Hey, is that...?

ALLEN: Is that the guy named "Stupid Boss" in your address book, Shion?

SHION: You. Did. Not. Call. Our Boss!

**WILHELM makes his way over to SHION's table. He'd look grave, if it weren't for the look of amusement upon his face.

WILHELM: Shion Uzuki? I need to speak with you, please. And do you mind if I have a bite of salmon?

SHION: [under breath] Oh, no...

 


[DOCTOR'S OFFICE]

**JUNIOR and GAIGNUN are sitting in the crowded waiting room. GAIGNUN moodily leafs through a Japanese glamour magazine, while JUNIOR watches him from the corner of his eye.

JUNIOR: You. What's up with you?

GAIGNUN: [off-handed] Nothing.

JR: You lie. Something's up.

**No reply.

JR: You went for the mochi.

GAIGNUN: [visibly irritated] Shut up about your mochi! I was hungry.

JR: No, listen, I'm serious. When women are upset, they eat food. Lots of it! Mostly dairy, that is.

GAIGNUN: What if they're lactose-intolerant?(?)

JR: Don't change the subject. Besides, there's ice cream with soy in it or something. Anyway. You went straight for the mochi over at my place.

GAIGNUN: So?

JR: So there’s something wrong with you!

GAIGNUN: Since when did I have breasts and ovaries?

JR: What?

GAIGNUN: Only women do that. It's not applicable for men.

JR: What about metrosexuals such as yourself?

GAIGNUN: What?

JR: You heard me. for metrosexuals, what applies for women also applies to you.

GAIGNUN: Where do you get this, Nii-san!? Are you still talking to Albedo?

JR: You know I haven't heard from him in years!

GAIGNUN: [voice raised] I know, Shion. Shion brought you up to this. You're both almost married, I swear it.

**It's JUNIOR's turn to remain silent. The conversation never resumes. However, MIYUKI overheard some of it.

MIYUKI: Oh my!


[ELSA DINER AND COFFEE HOUSE- table -AFTERNOON]

SHION: [clearly nervous] You'd think he'd be mad? I stole his salmon, after all. But, he wasn't listening to me!

**Shion's only speaking to a coffee cup and the remaining salmon still in it's original container. At this point, JUNIOR and GAIGNUN walk in. JUNIOR heads toward the table, while GAIGNUN picks up a chilled coffee from the counter and pays.

JR: [bitter] Is that my salmon?

SHION: [snaps] What's left of it. [apologetic] Look, look, forget about that. How's the doctors?

JR: You owe me a salmon.

SHION: You owe me a genuine hug, but you don't see me whining about it. (?)

JR: You should think of that next time you sleep with other people and eat my ice cream!

**GAIGNUN arives at the table, opening his coffee.

GAIGNUN: Kiss and make up, already, neh?! I'd like that dinner party to happen.

SHION: Huh?

GAIGNUN: [taking his time] Junior needs a place for his dinner party.

SHION: What's wrong with your place?!

JR: Fool! You don't have parties in a tiny small room placed in a spaceship! And, I was gonna ask you, until you pilfered my salmon, wench.

SHION: Oh, like it's a privilege.

GAIGNUN: [scolding] Junior! [to Shion] Ignore him, he had a physical today. So what do you say?

SHION: Well... I'm still kind of mad about that fake hug last night.

JR: Morning!

SHION: Whatever. Tell you what. I'd let you have the party over at my house if... you give me three boxes of mochi.

JR: You're out of your intellect!

GAIGNUN: He's not in his right mind. The physical you know, done by a pretty nurse.

JR: Shush!

GAIGNUN: Shion, think about it. At least he didn't kick you out. He did let you eat his mochi.

SHION: Yeah...

GAIGNUN: And you just have to forgive him for misunderstanding you earlier. He's a male.

SHION: Yeah!

JR: Hey!

SHION: [beaming] I'll do it! It's the least I could do.

GAIGNUN: [smiling and bows] I'm glad we could come to an agreement.

**They both get up, and GAIGNUN places his arm over SHION's shoulders and pulls her to the door.

GAIGNUN: [soothing] Now, I know there's some tidying up you have to do. Why don't you go do that for me? I'll bring some more salmon and that mochi we promised you.

SHION: O...okay...

**SHION leaves, and GAIGNUN returns to the table. JUNIOR is dumbfounded.

JR: How did you do that?!

GAIGNUN: You dubbed it... "Women's Tao."

JR: You're kidding me!

GAIGNUN: No. All you need is peace and understanding.

JR: And you claim you're not a metrosexual. Whatever!

GAIGNUN: No, just understanding and peaceful.

JR: And pretty-looking. (?)

**Pause.

JR: ...I think she has an ulterior motive. (?)

GAIGNUN: Look a gift horse in the mouth much? (?)

JR: No, really. That was way too quick. When Shion's angry, she stays that way for a long time.

GAIGNUN: Women's Tao, I'm telling you! It works!

**Throughout this exchange, they have been eating at the salmon Shion left behind. Suddenly, GAIGNUN gets up and begins to leave.

JR: Whoa, whoa! Is there a bee in your bonnet?

GAIGNUN: [nervous] Uh, no, I gotta do something. Bye.

**GAIGNUN exits.

JR: Eh, your loss.

**JUNIOR nibbles on the remaining salmon, and is tapped on the shoulder. He turns around, and is confronted with the reason GAIGNUN beat a hasty retreat. It's KOS-MOS, who runs part time at the runner of the Elsa Diner. And she isn't too happy with food from the outside.

KOS-MOS: [stern] I believe you should take that outside, Gaignun Kukai Junior... Failure to comply will have you banned from the restaurant.

JR: But I like your curry and coffee! And I was just going to order both!

KOS-MOS: Allow me to speak in Layman's Terms: beat it.


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2 October 2005 00:01 EDT | Posted by games6/shiseiten


[SHION'S HOUSE- Establishing (?)]

[SHION'S HOUSE- Living room/Kitchen -NIGHT]

**JR and SHION are dancing in place, waiting for more quests. GAIGNUN is leaning on the wall, bored. The place is only halfway packed.

SHION: Why so glum? What's bugging you?

GAIGNUN: Not glum. This feels boring. We need to liven it up.

SHION: With what?

GAIGNUN: I don't know. [teasing] How about a keg?

JR: Gaignun, this is a dinner party. No kegs!

GAIGNUN: Didn't mom tell you not to use words you don't understand? This is just a gathering, hardly a party. Who in heck has spring rolls for dinner? I want a party.

JR: Do it on your own time!

GAIGNUN: You take things way to seriously. I was kidding about the keg. (?)

**JR Seethes.

GAIGNUN: Can I at least get some more salmon or something? We're out already.

MARY: [aside] Where's the salmon patties?!

GAIGNUN: See?

JR: ... Okay. Go get salmon. And nothing else. Wait. Get some happy pills.

**GAIGNUN snarls, and exits. MOMO, a party-goer, dances next to JUNIOR.

MOMO: Hi.

JR: Hello, there, kid. What's up?

MOMO: Er. Nothing. Bye.

**MOMO exits, dancing elsewhere. (?)

JR: …….

SHION: Don’t look at me!

JR: Want some more wine?

SHION: No, thanks...

JR: [surprised] What's up, you? You should be drunk by now.

**SHION stops dancing, and so does JUNIOR. She pulls him over to the kitchen.

SHION: Er, Junior... I have something to tell you.

JR: You're staying sober?

SHION: Er, no.

JR: Ah ha! Ulterior motive! (?)

SHION: What?

JR: You caved way too easily! I knew it! I know Women's Tao was a bunch of shit!

SHION: It isn't. It really isn't.

JR: Gaignun tried to pull that off with you in the Elsa. It didn't work, did it?

SHION: Actually...

JR: You can't lie. Be honest. I know you. You're too full of pride and stuff!

**Pause.

SHION: Uhm... Gee. Damn, you're right. I was just humoring him.

JR: [triumphant] So what crazy surprise do you have in store?

SHION: But only because he's a man. He doesn't get it!

JR: Uh-uh. No take-backs. It's a load of shit, and that's that.

**A buzz is heard. It's the intercom on SHION'S door. She goes to it and pushes a button. JUNIOR takes this moment to steal the plate of spring rolls.

SHION: Who's there?

???: [static] It's us from work! And Miyuki! Whee!

JR: The hell is that? Chipmunk on crack? (?)

SHION: Just a few more guests from work.

JR: From work!?

SHION: Er, yea. You see. After I left his place, Allen went and called everyone from work asking where I was. Hand me that plate of spring rolls.

**JR complies, but sneaking a few more off the plate every so often.

SHION: And plus, my boss pulled me out of lunch to talk to me about it. So... Long story short, I pissed the lot of them off. I had to get on their good side again.

JR: [mouthful] You mean, Allen pissed them off.

SHION: My name showed up on the caller IDs, so... they take it out on me. Stop eating those!!

JR: [mouth full] Sorry.

**SHION opens the door, and lets in MIYUKI, CHAOS, WILHELM, and several others.

JR: [mouth still full] Holy shit!

MIYUKI: Hello, Shion! Great party. Cute co-host! Are those spring rolls!? The doctor told me to stop having those. [she grabs the plate, anyway] These... are got other people. Yes. (?)

SHION: That's alright. We have riceballs on the counter.

MIYUKI: Alright!!

JR: She's hyper.

MIYUKI: And you're short.

JR: [snatches back the plate] Tch!

**MIYUKI exits, to be replaced by chaos.

CHAOS: Greetings. [wave, moves on]

SHION: [beams] Hi chaos!

**Next is KEVIN.

SHION: [beams brighter, if possible] Hi, Kevin!

**KEVIN says nothing, but nods in her direction. He walks straight into the living room.

JR: He always like that?

SHION: Ever since, you know.

JR: Oh, Allen.

SHION: No, when I gave the KOS-MOS prototype breasts and a vagina. It was supposed to look male. He never lived it down, the chauvinist. (?)

**JUNIOR laughs. WILHELM is the last to walk in through the door. JUNIOR's manner suddenly changes from easygoing to guarded. (?)

WILHELM: Hello, Shion. Are you faring well tonight?

SHION: [nervous] Er, yes.

WILHELM: [cold] Gaignun Jr.

JUNIOR: [even colder] Hello... Wilhelm. Want some spring rolls, spring rolls?

SHION: Junior! [knocks his head]

WILHELM: [clears throat] Well, I'll say. Shion, I just hope you lead no one astray.

SHION: Er, yea, me too.

WILHELM: [faint smile] I'll be seeing you.

**Without another word, he heads into the living room. JUNIOR is angry.

JR: Wilhelm is your boss?!

SHION: Er, yeah.

JR: You invited that bastard to my dinner party!

SHION: He is my boss.

JR: [growl] You did not tell me this...

SHION: It was implied!

JR: The hell!? Men don't get hints!

SHION: You should.

JR: Well we don't!

SHION: And you go and say bad things about "Women's Tao," what's the matter with you? At least we're on the right track!

JR: How would we know? You'd all be in the bushes pretending to be ninjas.

SHION: That makes no sense!

JR: Neither is dodging in and out of bushes when you can take the train!

**SHION is stunned.

JR: Er, you know? Track? On the right track? Train track? Hahaha.

SHION: Oh, you and your stupid--

**MARY, along with CHAOS, enter the kitchen. SHION and JUNIOR abruptly stop arguing.

JR: Er, hi.

SHION: Hey.

CHAOS: You have any more salmon patties? Mary here ate the last one.

SHION: Not yet. Gaignun's--

JR: --getting some more.

MARY: He sure's takin' a long time with it.

SHION/JR: Yeah..

MARY: Hey, what's in the oven?

SHION: Oh, no! The cake.

**SHION hurries over to the oven, and at the precise moment the buzzer sounds again. MARY and CHAOS exit with the plate of spring rolls.

SHION: Damn... Rubedo, can you get that?

JR: Fools stole my spring rolls! And don’t call me that!

SHION: Shut up, and get the door!

JR.: Aaarrrgh!!!

**JUNIOR walks over to the door anyway. He's confused by the intercom.

JR: The hell do you work this thing?!

SHION: ..You are so old style (?) Press a button. Ask who it is. If it's someone you know, let them in. Simple. [grumble] And I'm supposed to be the bimbo of this series…

JR: I heard that!

**JUNIOR presses the intercom.

JR: [nervous about the new technology] Uh.. um.. h-h-hello?

[Shion rolls her eyes in the kitchen]

???: [static] Junior it's me!!!!

JR: Wow, I bet he grabbed more wine, too.

???: [static] Jack, it's me!!!!

JR: Jack!? Gaignun, you know that isn't my real name. Get in here. Mary's starving!

**Jr opens the door. To his dismay, it isn't GAIGNUN. It's ALBEDO. He stumbles into the doorway, leaning on the door. It swings erratically, because he doesn't feel like keeping his balance. (?)

JR: Oh hell no!

ALBEDO: [shouting] Your real name is Rubedo! Hahahhaha!! Hello, brother!

**JUNIOR screams with rage.

JR: What did you do with Gaignun?!

ALBEDO: Just beat him here, is all.

JR: [stunned] You beat him?!

ALBEDO: Here.

JR: [slips into Older Brother Mode] You really need to stop pounding on him.

ALBEDO: He'll be fine. He's been through worse, the schizophrenic. Remember when he was pretending to be dad?

JR: [snaps out of it] What the hell are you doing here?! Get out!

ALBEDO: No way. [slams the door behind him, and towers over JUNIOR] There's a party going on. I'm crashing it. Hahahaha!! Hahahaha!!

JR: [frusterated] Albedo!!!!

ALBEDO: Don't mind if I do.

**ALBEDO shoves past JUNIOR and heads into the kitchen, SHION is trying to pry dried cake mix off the oven's bottom. Her face is obscured by the fact that somehow, her entire head's in the oven. (?)

ALBEDO: Hey, who's commiting suicide? That's no way to go! (?)

SHION: That you, Junior? Who was at the door?

**ALBEDO answers by goosing her. She yelps, and stands upright.

SHION: Albedo?! What the hell?! You weren't invited. Junior! And you get mad at me for inviting my co-workers, and you have to invite your crazy twin brother! AAAIIIYAA!!!!!!!!!!!

JR: [enters the kitchen sheepishly] Yea, about that...

ALBEDO: [mock surprise] Shion! Didn't see you there! Although Rubedo told me enough times about your wiggly rear!

SHION: [anger rising, loud voice drowning out ALBEDO] What happened? Did he break down the door?

JR: I--

ALBEDO: [cutting in] He thought I was Nigredo and let me in!

SHION: [shocked] You did what?!

ALBEDO: I also beat him here, apparently. He was always slow. A turtle could beat him. Hahahaha!!

SHION: You beat Gaignun?!

JR: He did a really good Gaignun impression!

ALBEDO: Impression nothing. Hehehehe Intercoms are useless.


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2 October 2005 00:01 EDT | Posted by games6/shiseiten

SHION: [angry] I can't believe this. Who in hell lets wierdos in at seven at night?!

JR: It's evening…

SHION: Shut up, you! No matter what time it is it's wrong! And in my house! I need a drink.

ALBEDO: It's dark already. Cool. Coffee time…hahahaha

SHION: Captain of the Durandal and you can't understand the concept of the door intercom. Geez!!

**MOMO enters.

MOMO: Hey, I heard a scream, and Mary wants salmon, is everything oka-- [stops dead] Oh my!

ALBEDO: [beaming] Oh my god, is that ma peche?!

JUNIOR/SHION: What?!

MOMO: [enraged] How could you invite this monster, you guys!

JR: I-i-i-i I didn't! Honest!

ALBEDO: He just let me in. No invitation required. I beat Nigredo, too. He was slow as molasses. Hahahah!!

MOMO: You let him in?! Argh!

**MOMO flees.

ALBEDO: Ahhh nooo so much for that jailbait. hahahahaha

SHION: Oh god. Where's Gaignun and the salmon?

ALBEDO: Salmon? Who eats that anymore?

SHION: Me?

ALBEDO: [shakes head in disapproval] You really shouldn't. It's bad for you.

**ALBEDO turns his attenion to SHION's kitchen, looking for a coffee maker.

ALBEDO: I could use some coffee right now.

JR: Oh no you don't.

ALBEDO: You know I was drunk!

JR: I also know you are a compulsive liar.

SHION: What the hell are you... nevermind, I'd rather not know.

ALBEDO: Funny story. I was drunk--

JR: Lies!

ALBEDO: And uh, how do you say?

SHION: Say what?

**Pause.

SHION: Say what?!

JR: [mumble] Hewankedintoacoffeepotfullofcoffee.

SHION: Can't hear ya.

JR: [louder] He wanked into a coffee pot full of coffee!

SHION: [dismay] What?!

JR: Do I have to scream?!

SHION: No, no, I... heard you.

ALBEDO: Not my fault! Someone spiked my vodka.

JR: How in hell do you spike vodka?

ALBEDO: [shrugs] Same as you'd spike a volleyball, I reckon. Hehehehahaha!

SHION: I can't believe this...

**CHAOS walks in.

CHAOS: What's happening in here? MOMO's upset.

JR/SHION: [points to ALBEDO] That's what's happening.

CHAOS: Oh, no. How'd he get in here?

ALBEDO: It wasn't hard--

JR: No one cares.

ALBEDO: You really think you could keep me in this kitchen all night?! I told you, I'm crashing this thing into the ground!

JR: [puffs out chest] I could try.

ALBEDO: Do or do not, there is no try.

JR: Shut up.

**ALBEOD suddenly jumps on the counter.

ALBEDO: Don't do it, Rubedo! I'm on the high ground, and that gives me 5+ Agility!

CHAOS: Eh..?

ALBEDO: Quiet, Jesus. I'm busy. Hahahaha!

CHAOS: Doing what, I imagine?

ALBEDO: It's gonna be you, if the doujinshi writers have a say!

**CHAOS looks disgusted.

JR: Albedo... get off the counter right now!

WILHELM: Where are our hosts? They should be out here with us. I'm going to go see.

SHION: Junior, don't let him in!

ALBEDO: Let him see me! I got beef with him, anyway. He's paying me minimum wage as a testament! I'm worth more than that!

SHION: Are you insane?! You'd kill whatever career I have left!

ALBEDO: Who's bright idea was to turn the world's most powerful android into a domestic servant?!

SHION: Kevin's, I told you!

CHAOS: It's true. I could vouch. (?)

ALBEDO: You Vector nuts always stick together. Like a bag of nuts. Hahaha!! And it's your fault anyway.

WILHELM (V.O.): Shion, everything alright?

JR: [sour] He's your boss, not mine.

SHION: [huffy] Fine. I can't trust you with doors, anyway. I know that much. What kind of co-host are you?

ALBEDO: A crappy one. Hahahahaha!

JR: Grrr Albeeedoooo!!

**With plain cake, SHION exits the kitchen and into the living room.

SHION (V.O.): And can you at least keep him away from the coffeepot?! MOMO, Junior's in the kitchen. He's busy. Yea. Wilhelm, sir, have some cake? Mary, the salmon's coming, I really don't know what's taking him so long. Traffic, maybe. And where's Shelley? Hey, Miyuki, I thought you said no springrolls... [fade out]

**Pause.

CHAOS: This is a little awkward.

JR: Go back out there, then!!

CHAOS: No. [shudder] They're playing Spin the Compass of Order. It's like fortune telling or something. I'd rather be in here. It is less awkward…

ALBEDO: Oh, not at all. It's all a state of mind. *taps forehead* Hahaha.

JR: You'd know all about that.

ALBEDO: Stop that. Give me some coffee.

JR: No.

ALBEDO: Let me crash the party.

JR: [firmly] No!

ALBEDO: Fine. Wasn't going to without my coffee anyway. I can wait. Hmm. How about some mochi?

JR: Why, your girlfriend dump you?

ALBEDO: [sarcasm] Oh, burn on me. I'm going to go cry and write about it.

 


[SHION'S HOUSE- Porch -NIGHT]

**GAIGNUN is outside, practically leaning onto the doorbell. He appears to be in a hurry. After a bit, CHAOS opens the door.

CHAOS: Everyone's wondering where you are. What happened?

GAIGNUN: No time. Don't want any trouble. Here.

**GAIGNUN thrusts the package into CHAOS' hands.

CHAOS: What is--

**JUNIOR muscles past CHAOS and takes the package.

JR: Jeez, finally! I've been listening to Mary whine and moan for about two hours! Now I can... wait.

GAIGNUN: [fidgety] What?!

JR: This is not salmon!

CHAOS: What is it?

JR: It's tuna! I wanted salmon!

GAIGNUN: Oh, dear... I was in a hurry.

JR: You took two hours to get tuna!

GAIGNUN: Well--

JR: Mary's gonna be incensed! And that is not good on my part! How in hell could you get tuna confused with a pink fish!? Are you colorblind or something?!

GAIGNUN: Look.

JR: No, you look!

GAIGNUN: Allen's in my car right now, and I gotta get him home before he suspects something!

JR: What?

GAIGNUN: I ran into him at the grocery store. He was buying napkins to cry on. [exasperated] I had to listen to him for over an hour!

CHAOS: That's why he was so late.

GAIGNUN: So that explains all. I'm taking him home, after this "errand."

JR: Does he know this is Shion's house?

CHAOS: I'm sure he does now. He's getting out of the car.

GAIGNUN: Someone stop him!

**Behind them, the passenger car opens revealing a distraught Allen. He stands, stretches, sneezes, and looks toward the house. Spotting the mailbox, he takes out a rabbit-shaped cell phone and stares at it, then the mailbox. His jaw drops.

CHAOS/JR/GAIGNUN: Oh, crap!

ALLEN: [points to JUNIOR] You!!

 


[SHION'S HOUSE- Kitchen]

**SHION barges into the kitchen.

SHION: Jr, we need mo-- Oh my golly!! (?)

**ALBEDO has found the coffeepot, and is brewing some coffee. He's also longing around in his underwear.

SHION: Oh my golly! (?)

ALBEDO: [indifferent] Coffee, Shion?

***SHION says nothing, only staring at the coffeepot in horror. Covering her mouth, she runs out the kitchen toward the porch.

ALBEDO: [glances down] Acting like she's never seen underwear before... I'm just making myself comfortable.


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1 October 2005 00:01 EDT | Posted by games6/shiseiten

[Porch]

***ALLEN is trying to get past CHAOS, JUNIOR, and GAIGNUN, only to have everyone knocked down by SHION.

ALLEN: Shion! This is your house!

SHION: What the?! How--?!

ALLEN: Say it isn't so!

SHION: What? How? What? [stunned]

ALLEN: You cheated on me with Junior!

**SHION begins laughing uncontrollably.

JR: [offended] Oi! What's so funny about that?!

ALLEN: Oh, so you admit it!

JR: [hastily] No, no, no! She just went over to my place for mochi--

ALLEN: [disbelieving] Mochi?! Is that what you call “it” these days? Is that an euphemism?! (?)

JR: The hell?! What's wrong with you?!

ALLEN: [to SHION] Right after me! How could you do that?!

**SHION is still rolling on the floor laughing.

ALLEN: I'm serious! Miyuki said you guys were practically married and--

SHION: [stops laughing] She said what?!

ALLEN: [to GAIGNUN] She said you said they were practically married! That could only mean one thing! .. One thing!

GAIGNUN: [balks] You're kidding.

ALLEN: [to JUNIOR] And she bought you up to something.

JR: [cursing] Where are you getting all this?

ALLEN: I don't know. Why else would you be in the doctor's office?

JR: Getting a physical.

ALLEN: For what?! Huh? To hope you were sterile?!

CHAOS: If you have to ask...

SHION: Allen, what are you thinking?

ALLEN: Here's what I'm thinking. I think you got Junior pregnant!

**Dead silence. Then everyone begins to burst out laughing. (?)

SHION: Oh, man! What a good one!

JUNIOR: You almost had me there, Al.

ALLEN: I'm not joking!

GAIGNUN: We're talking Male Pregnancy! That's impossible!

ALLEN: I mean it! Junior's almost 30 and looks like a kid, there's no telling what else he's capable of!

JUNIOR: [mocking] Arr! I eat wimps like you for breakfast!

ALLEN: [scared] See?! [to CHAOS] You believe me, right?

CHAOS: No.

ALLEN: You know what? I'm going to ask Miyuki myself. I know she's in there!

SHION: [hurridly] No she isn't.

ALLEN: You're a liar! Let me through.

SHION: No!

**Suddenly, a scream is heard from the kitchen.

ALLEN: [triumphant] I recognize that shrill chipmunk squeal anywhere!

JR: Just so you know, you can't be in two places at once, yeah?

SHION: No, fool! That's Miyuki in the kitchen!

JR: [light bulb] Oh no! I left the kitchen unguarded!

GAIGNUN: From what?

CHAOS: [to JUNIOR] You left the kitchen unguarded!?

JR: I left the kitchen unguarded!

GAIGNUN: What happened?

JUNIOR/SHION: Albedo showed up, that's what happened!

GAIGNUN: How?!

JR: He beat you.

GAIGNUN: [not getting it] That was years ago!

JR: NO, he beat you here!

CHAOS: [also not getting it] That was years ago, on Old Miltia.

JR: [resigned] Oh, forget it. Time for damage control.

 


[The Kitchen.]

**Led by JUNIOR, SHION, ALLEN, CHAOS, and GAIGNUN enter the kitchen. MIYUKI is staring at ALBEDO.

SHION: What's going on?!

JUNIOR/GAIGNUN: Oh my god!

MIYUKI: Oh, the scream? It was one of surprise, really. Have you seen that thing?!

ALBEDO: No, she was too busy running out of here trying not to barf, the man-hater.

GAIGNUN: [distraught] The coffeepot's empty!

MIYUKI: Man-hater? She slept with Allen.

ALBEDO: Well, that explains it.

GAIGNUN: Where's the coffee, Albedo?!

ALBEDO: Oh, her screech got everyone else's attention. So I gave them coffee.

SHION: Oh, no!

**In a panic, GAIGNUN, CHAOS, and JUNIOR run into the living room, swatting coffee mugs out of everyone's hands.

MARY (V.O.): Ah, what the?!

JUNIOR (V.O.): Don't drink it! It's contaminated!

WILHELM (V.O.): The Compass did not forsee this!

CHAOS (V.O.): I keep telling you, it's a fake.

MOMO (V.O.): It looks fine to me. Look at all this creamer!

**Crashing ensures.

SHION: All over my carpet!

ALLEN: Miyuki, is it true? Did Shion cheat on me?

MIYUKI: Yup. Why else would he be in the doctor's office? Probably got something from Shion.

SHION: From Allen!

ALBEDO: Whoa, whoa whoa whoa whoa! Shion slept with Allen recently?

ALLEN: Last night.

**ALBEDO's jaw drops.

ALBEDO: You're kidding me!

SHION [shameful] Sadly no.

ALBEDO: Oh. My. God. You've just made me rich!

SHION: [puzzled] How?

ALBEDO: You see, me and the other testament, Virgil had a bet going...

MIYUKI: You still think Shion's a lesbian?!

ALBEDO: You told me that!

SHION: Miyuki!

MIYUKI: What!

ALBEDO: Of course, I didn't believe her. Virgil wanted to try to kill me over it. So we made peace and made a bet. And that sucker just lost. Sorry, Miyuki, I was rooting for you, you know. Must be a real downer. Better luck next life. Hahaha!

MIYUKI: [crestfallen] ...Yea.

SHION: [shocked] What? You're a le... l... what?!

MIYUKI: No! I'm just randomly sad. Mood swings. Didn't take my pills. Got any mochi?

**ALBEDO pulls out his cell phone from his pants on the floor. Dailing a number, he stands aside and begins to speak.

ALBEDO: Hey! Virg, guess what? You're a loser! Shion loves the penis! ...Don't be cursing me out, sore loser! It's true! ...With Allen, no less! ...No, I'm dead serious. Here, here he is. Hahaha

**ALBEDO hands the phone to ALLEN.

ALLEN: Er, hello? ...Yea... Yea, I did. Yea... yea... well, thank you. Here you go. [hands phone back to ALBEDO]

SHION: [still shocked] What?

ALBEDO: See? I told you! ...Shut up and eat some brains or something. Pay up tomorrow!

ALLEN: [awed] Virgil... said congrats. He told me congrats.

MIYUKI: [bitter]I'm sure he was joking.

ALBEDO: [covers phone] You're just mad because you didn't get any. [back to phone] What? Oh, just some ranting lesbian. I'm not making any of this up! You can ask Kevin, the fool called him asking where Shion was at three in the morni-- Call him. Call him right now... [fade to background]

SHION: Miyuki! Why did you say I was a... a...

MIYUKI: Lesbian? You look like one. And act like one. And--

SHION: [angry] Everyone says that! It's because I made KOS-MOS female, isn't it? How unfair!

MIYUKI: [meek] You also hug me bunches...(?)

SHION: Miyuki. It's what girl friends do!

[Jr. returns]

JR.: Girlfriends or girl friends, with the space?

MIYUKI: Now, you see how confusing that was?! How was I supposed to know?!

SHION: [thinks] Oh... wait. Yeah, I said that wrong. I see now.

**CHAOS,and GAIGNUN return.

JR: By the way, what's happened?

SHION: [frank] I just made Albedo rich….

ALLEN: [points to JUNIOR] You!!

JR: Oh, come off it already. You're worse than my fanbase, pairing me up with just about anybody. You're a sick man!

SHION: Who hitted on me when we first met? Jerk!

JR: [defensive] Your mom, that's who! And what do you care?

ALBEDO: Virg, wait a second. [covers mouth piece] What's this? (?)

ALLEN: She also slept with Junior!

**ALBEDO begins to laugh uncontrollably.

JR: [offended] Is it that unfeasible?!

ALBEDO: Yea, pretty much. You can't get nothing! Not even Shion.

JR.: What! I’ll have you know, all the girls on the Durandal have had-

SHION: Ew!

ALBEDO: [to phone] Please tell me you heard all that! ...Oh, what the hell. You believe that! No wonder you subscribe to the Weekly World News; you're gullible! ...Oh, now that you bring it up, Febronia was married! With seven kids! So there! ...Everyone knew that! You're a sucker, and now you're a broke sucker! You lucky I didn't follow through with that other bet; I'd be owning your pretty blue robe by now.

CHAOS: You're talking on the cell so loudly. Get out of here! That's so rude.

ALBEDO: Yeah, whatever, Jesus. Hahahaha

CHAOS: For the last time, I am not--


Edit this Post | Delete this Post
 
 
 
1 October 2005 00:01 EDT | Posted by games6/shiseiten

ALBEDO: Well, just play along! I got a bet riding on you, too! I'll show Voyager up yet! Then Ziggy will owe me.

**ALBEDO picks up his clothes and leaves.

CHAOS: What was that al... nevermind. Nephilim will tell me later.

MIYUKI: Nephilim?

CHAOS: Oops. [wiggles fingers in MIYUKI's direction] You never heard that.

MIYUKI: [blank] Heard what?

CHAOS: [kisses her on the cheek] That's my girl.

JR: [scoff] Women's Tao?

CHAOS: What rubbish is that? (?)

GAIGNUN: Good rubbish. It worked on Shion.

**JUNIOR and SHION laugh. Although SHION does this nervously.

GAIGNUN: [nervous] Well... did it? Tell me.

SHION: Er. Only girls can do it.

JR: I said no take-backs.

SHION: [angered] Take-back this!

**SHION picks up and throws a coffee mug in JUNIOR's direction. Just at that moment, WILHELM entered the kitchen and catches it with one hand.

WILHELM: [scolding] Shion! I'm dissapointed in you. It's bad enough we had coffee swiped out of our hands, and a naked man serving it.

JR: [defiant] I saved your life!

SHION: B-boss! It's not what it looks like.

WILHELM: Oh? It sure looked like you were chugging mugs at your man. One of them, anyway.

SHION/JUNIOR: [stunned] My man? My man?!

WILHELM: I know. It surprised me, too. I guess his fanbase wasn't too far off. [to ALLEN] Allen. You shouldn't be with this girl. Oh, and neither should you, Miyuki.

MIYUKI: But I'm not-

MOMO: We heard everything.

MARY: Junior! How could you?!

JR: Quiet, you're not my wife.

MARY: She isn't either! ...And you're pregnant?!

JR: [scream] Oh my god!

WILHELM: Mary, don't be silly. It's the other way around. Junior may have got something from her, though. Like a cold.

SHION: [reflex] From Allen!

ALLEN: What?!

WILHELM: Your fault.

MARY: Ha, ha! [ponts to JUNIOR] You all caught the stupid from Allen!

JR: Oh, yeah? Well, you're gonna get it from me if I have a say in it.

**MARY's dumbfounded. She runs.

JR: Yeah, I'm gonna get you!

WILHELM: I hope you don't take habit to harassing your employees.

JR: At least I don't kill them.

MARY (V.O.): I'd rather die!

ALBEDO (V.O.): That could be arranged. Hahaha!!

SHION: All I did was go to Junior's to eat cherry vanilla mochi!

ALLEN: [screaming] Code! It's code!!

WILHELM: Cherry vanilla! We aren’t that stupid! We're all adults here. We know what that means!

MOMO: Why the cherry, though? [suspicious] Am I involved, somehow?

WILHELM: You forget. You're a peach. Momo means peach.

MOMO: [sheepish] Oh... I forget. My sister, you know. Her name was Sakura.

[Silence]

SHION: But, but, but but... [meekly] it's my favorite.

JR: I can vouch. She eats it whenever she's sad.

ALLEN: Well, you must have depressed her.

MIYUKI: [giggling] Yeah, Junior. You're no Albedo.

JR: Shut up damn it!

GAIGNUN: This is all a big misunderstanding, Sir.

WILHELM: I don't care to hear it. We all had enough for the night.

**SHION's house begins to empty.

WILHELM: Well, assuming that you're feeling well, I'll see all three of you in the morning.

MIYUKI: Yea... bye.

**WILHELM exits, followed by MIYUKI, MOMO, ALLEN, and eventually CHAOS. He leaves with an apologizing shrug.

SHION: This just didn't happen to me.

GAIGNUN: It did.

SHION: I need some mochi.

**WILHELM returns.

WILHELM: Can you at least wait til I leave? I'm taking this mug of coffee on the table, here. I'm going need it.

**WILHELM exits again, taking a long swig of the coffee.

GAIGNUN: I need some mochi, too...

**ALBEDO returns, fully clothed.

ALBEDO: I'm off the phone now. Wow, the coffee was sure a hit. It's all gone.

SHION: If there's any luck for me, boss'll be dead by morning.

ALBEDO: Silly woman. Cow milk doesn't kill. Hahahaha

JR: You're calling yourself a cow, now?!

ALBEDO: According to the magazines, I am. Sad society. Look how anorexic I'm looking. And they call it fat. Sad world, I'm telling you. [claps hands together] Why all the sad faces?! I got money to roll in. You mentioned mochi. You ladies need some mochi. I'll buy. It's all on me. Shion just made me rich, it's the least I can do. Hehehehe

GAIGNUN: I'm not depressed.

ALBEDO: Sure you are.

SHION: I already have three boxes! What you can do is kill Allen.

ALBEDO: You mad, woman?! I wouldn't get near that emotional thing. Killing him would be mercy. I don't do mercy. You already know this. Besides, three boxes isn't going to help you. You need a bucket… a bucket of ice cream! Now let's go.

**Reluctantly, everyone follows ALBEDO out the door.

 


[ELSA DINER AND COFFEE HOUSE- table -NIGHT]

KOS-MOS: There's a 85% chance you're joking, Albedo.

ALBEDO: Joking not! Three of those buckets of ice cream there. We're depressed!

GAIGNUN: I'm not depressed.

ALBEDO: Yea, you're just emotional. Get a sweater to cry on. Hahaha! Oh, and a kiddie box for Rubedo here. Hahahaha!

JR: Gimme a bucket damn it!

KOS-MOS: Albedo, I will allow the purchase of three buckets of ice cream. However, because of your build I doubt you can consume a bucket of ice cream, Gaignun Kukai Junior.

JR: You'd be surprised.

KOS-MOS: I am not taking that chance. There's a 75% risk. I could have a lawsuit on my hands. I am sorry. [to Albedo] By your manner, I assume money is no objection?

ALBEDO: [grinning] Nope. Lay it on me!

GAIGNUN: Not literally.

KOS-MOS: I understand he's not to be taken literally, Gaignun Kukai. I will be right back. Which flavors would you prefer?

ALBEDO: Uh, coffee.

GAIGNUN: Vanilla.

JR: Bubble gum sherbet.

ALBEDO: How childish!

JR: Shut up!

SHION: ...Cherry vanilla.

KOS-MOS: I will be right back. [leaves]

JR: After all that, you'd still eat cherry vanilla flavoured anything?!

SHION: I can't help it! It's my favorite!

ALBEDO: Whoo boy. I suggest you get a new favorite. When people hear those two words in the same sentence... [makes a pow sound] misunderstanding.

GAIGNUN: There's too much slang out there. Anything can mean anything.

ALL: Hear, hear.

JR.: Like, bang. It used to be the sound for a gun.

SHION: Or 69…..

ALBEDO: No, that's a pretty old one. Since the sixties, at least. Or the Cesear. I think he coined it or something. (?)

SHION: [frusterated] I wouldn't know!

ALBEDO: If your choice of ice cream is any indication, you shouldn't.

**SHION growls. KOS-MOS returns with three buckets balanced on one arm, and a small box for JUNIOR. She passes them out, and goes back to work. Everyone begins to dig in. Especially Albedo. Literally. With his hands.

JR: Damn! I wanted a bucket!! Albedo, I demand you give me some of yours.

GAIGNUN: [to JUNIOR] Coffee flavor. You sure of that?

ALBEDO: No, Rube. Grow a few inches, and hair on your chin. Which is never! Hahaha! And as for you, Nigredo, stick your hands in your ice cream. It's the only way to enjoy it.

GAIGNUN: I knew you've been talking to him, Junior. No!

JR: Shut up! You forget who's older than you by a mere 10 seconds!

ALBEDO: As long as you look like that, who cares?

JR.: GOD DAMMIT!

SHION: [muffled] Will all of you shut up… please?

**Everyone turns to see that SHION has stuck her entire head in the bucket.

JR: You're gonna die! Suffocate! Get out of there!

SHION: [muffled] No. [chewing sounds] I don't care.

ALBEDO: What are you doing! The night is young! You can't die yet!

GAIGNUN: Yet?!

ALBEDO: She can die after I buy her a gold-lined noose. Or at least a new oven to stick her head in. I'd be ashamed to put my head in that thing. Or food.

JR: Albedo, you're insane. And it's three in the morning.

SHION: [muffled] For crying out loud, it's night! It's dark out! [chewing sounds] Dark as my soul!

JR: [raps SHION's bucket with a spoon] Come out of your bucket and say that.

GAIGNUN: You're still arguing about that?! Maybe you should marry. Seriously…

**SHION says nothing. JR pouts. KOS-MOS passes over the table.

KOS-MOS: Shion Uzuki, is something the matter?

ALBEDO: You have to excuse her. That time of the month. You know how the chant goes.

KOS-MOS: [squints at SHION] You are correct. It is best to leave her alone.

ALBEDO: Check that! Lucky guess. Women's Tao, works

SHION: Aiiyaaa!

ALBEDO: Come out of that bucket and say that!

KOS-MOS: But that isn't the only reason.

JR: What, you double as an observational Realian?

KOS-MOS: I am equipped with observational technologies usually reserved for the 100-Series, yes.

ALBEDO: Oh, nothing big. She slept with Allen. Rubedo, too.

JR: Did not!

ALBEDO: And I'd like to see how many people believe it. I have another bet going on. Kevin's house is mine! Anyway. You should be with MOMO, anyway. Jailbait should date jailbait.

**JUNIOR throws his box of ice cream at ALBEDO, who catches it.

ALBEDO: [laugh] More for me, sucker. Thanks. Hahahaha

JR: I hope your head gets blown off from it!

ALBEDO: Trivial. It'll just grow back, stupid. Hahahaha!

KOS-MOS: My emotional response is to vomit in the lavatory. Please excuse me. [leaves]

SHION: [muffled] Why did I ever program that?

ALBEDO: Because you're stupid? Oh, Rubedo dear, catch.

**Without warning, the coffeepot KOS-MOS left behind is thrown at JUNIOR. He doesn't catch it, and it spills all over him.

JR: Damn it, Albedo!

ALBEDO: [disapproving] That's also why I could beat Nigredo. Both of you are too slow. Shion's the only fast one here. Sad.

SHION: [muffled] I can still hear you! (?)

ALBEDO: [ignoring her] Yes, that really isn't good for you. Lay off the salmon. Fattening junk.

The end
[KOS-MOS appears one the last page as a "soup nazi"]

KOS-MOS: ROAR. [throws a spoon] NO SOUP FOR YOU.

 


Posted by games6/shiseiten at 8:33 PM EST
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