Question: What is every blonde's ambition?
Answer: To be like Vanna White and learn the alphabet.
Question: How many blondes does it take to make chocolate chip cookies?
Answer: One hundred. One to make the batter and ninety-nine to crack the shells on the M&Ms.
Question: How many blondes does it take to change a lightbulb?
Answer: One hundred: one to hold the lightbulb, the other 99 to rotate the house!
Question: Why cant a blonde dial 911?
Answer: She can't find the eleven!
Question: Why did the blonde take a ladder into the bar?
Answer: She heard the drinks were on the house!
Question: What do a blonde and a car have in common?
Answer: They can both drive you crazy!
Question: What do you call a hundred blondes stacked up on each other?
Answer: An air mattress
Question: How many blondes does it take to milk a cow?
Answer: Five - one to hold the udder, and four to lift and the cow up and down.
Question: How can you tell a blonde's been using the computer?
Answer: There's white-out all over the screen.
Question: How does a blonde spell "farm?"
Question: What's the definition of eternity?
Answer: Four blondes in four cars at a four-way stop.
Question: What did the blonde say when she saw a box Cheereos?
Answer: "Neato... doughnut seeds!"
Question: How did the blonde die raking leaves?
Answer: She fell out of the tree!
Question: How do you know when a blonde is going to say something stupid?
Answer: She opens her mouth!
Question: How do you drown a blonde?
Answer: Put a scratch and sniff sticker at the bottom of a pool!
Question: Why was the blonde staring at the orange juice carton?
Answer: It said concentrate!
Question: How do you make a blonde's eyes sparkle with joy?
Answer: Shine a flashlight in her ear!
Question: What's dumber than a brunette trying to build a house at the bottom of the ocean?
Answer: A blonde trying to burn it down!
Question: What do you call a blonde who dyed her hair brunette?
Answer: Artifical Intelligence!
Question: Do you know a lot of blondes?
Answer: I did, but they all dyed!
Question: How do you kill a blonde?
Answer: Spike her shoulder pads. Every time she shrugs her shoulders and says "I don't know, she'll be one step closer to the grave!
Question: What do you do if a blonde throws a pin at you?
Answer: Duck because she's got a granade!
Question: How do you get a blonde to laugh on Sunday?
Answer: Tell her a joke on Friday!
Question: What do you call a blonde with a high IQ?
Answer: A Golden Retriever !
Question: What do you call a blonde in a freezer?
Answer: A frosted flake!
Question: Why did the blonde stand in front of the mirror with her eyes closed?
Answer: She wanted to know what she looked like when she was sleeping!
Question: What happened to the Blonde Ice Hockey team?
Answer: They drowned in Spring Training!
Question: A did the blonde write on her job application?
Answer: When it asked for "Education," she wrote "Hooked on Phonics."
Question: Did you hear about the blonde that tried to blow up her husband's car?
Answer: She burned her lips on the tailpipe
Question: How can you tell when a blonde has been baking chocolate chip cookies?
Answer: There are M&M shells all over the floor.
Question: What happens when a blonde walks down the street and sees a banana peel a hundred yards ahead?
Answer: She sighs and says, "Here we go again!"
Question: Did you hear about the blonde that tried to blow up her husbands car?
Answer: She burned her lips on the tailpipe!
Question: Why did the blonde quit his restroom attendant job?
Answer: He couldnt figure out how to refill the hand dryer!
Question: What's the difference between a smart blonde and Bigfoot?
Answer: Maybe someday we'll find Bigfoot!
Question: A brunette doing laundry asked her blonde friend to help her find a match for her sock.
Answer: The blonde replied, "What for? Are you going to set it on fire?"
Question: Why couldn't the blonde add 10 and 7 on a calulator?
Answer: She couldn't find the 10 key.
Question: Why did the blonde throw her clock out the window?
Answer: So she could see time fly!
Question: Why do brunettes know so many blonde jokes?
Answer: It gives 'em something to do on Saturday night!
Question: A blonde and a brunette jumped off a cliff. Who hit bottom first?
Answer: The brunette - the blonde had to stop and ask for directions!
Question: What's the difference between Elvis and a smart blonde?
Answer: Elvis has been sighted
Question: Did you hear about the blonde skydiver?
Answer: She missed the Earth!
Question: A smart blond, Santa and a pregnant woman are on an elevator. A twenty-dollar bill lies on the ground. Who picks it up?
Answer: The pregnant woman. (The other two aren't real!)
Question: Why did the blonde burry her mom under the porch?
Answer: Because she wanted a step mom!
Question: Why did God create blondes?
Answer: Because sheep can't bring beer from the fridge.
Question: Why did God create brunettes?
Answer: Neither could the blondes
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