The Wonderful Journey Begins!
This game sucks. Period. Well, maybe not 'period'; I did write a review about how much it sucks (insert link later). But as much as I tried to describe how much Warrior of Rome sucks in that review, I don't think it's enough; hence, why I made this little section, with pictures! Now you too can experience its crappiness! Come along with me on this WONDERFUL JOURNEY!!
Before we get started, I wanted to take a picture of the box. Unfortunately, this is how it turned out:
That's right, the game is so evil that it blinds anyone that comes into contact with it.
Eh, that's ok. With my awesome MSPaint skills, I managed to recreate the boxart:
Here's an example of the box's evilness. Poor Sylvester got blinded by its evil aura when standing next to it.
Now he'll never catch Tweety. You bastard!!
STAGE ONE: HAGIA TRIADA
And so begins THE WONDERFUL JO....okay, I'll stop.
Those bastards.
This is the first area you see when you start the stage. Yeah, I don't understand it, either. Wouldn't it make more sense to put it over one of the occupied bases? Like the next pic.
Goal: Destroy the pirate ships while protecting your ten bases. Can't be that hard, right? Um...okay, why are my units life gauge mostly drained? Eh, I can manage. I mean, it's not like I'm outnumbered here....
One, two.....okay, I got five units. One, two, three, four, five, s......they got ten. You suck. Two minutes into the game and I'm already getting screwed. Great. So, you seriously expect me to protect all thoses bases with my weak ass army? My other five units come in later in the stage, but still, this is bullcrap.
I seriously wish I could show you this battle in motion, with the music playing in the background. They don't look like they're fighting, but dancing with each other. Everytime I see one of these fights, I feel like one of the following songs should be playing instead: "Macho Man", "In the Navy", and "It's Raining Men".
Conclusion: Stage 1 sucks for screwing you over from the very beginning.
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