Rayjay's Dream

This is Rayjay's Dream, a story I wrote oh so many years ago. Quite possibly 2001. Yes, 3 years is an eternity for me right now because I'm not old enough to realize that it's not that long ago. Anyway, I first posted this in the IGN message boards way back when I used to post there. Then I posted it at the FBI, but now it's time to lay this story in its final resting spot...er.. I mean my website. Read on!

The Almighty Dream Sequence

Rayjay has fallen asleep. As always, he has a dream. But his dreams are weird. You have been warned.

Rayjay: Hey, where am I?

weird guy with hat: You have been selected for the all improtant "Moon Mission"

Rayjay: What is this so called "Moon Mission"?

weird guy with hat: It involves the moon.

Rayjay: and what is it?

weird guy with hat: a mission.

Weird Dream Sequence

weird guy with hat: You and a few other men will blow up the moon because we beleve that it will hit the earth causing everyone to die.

Rayjay: Not the most original dream...

weird guy with hat: We have picked the best men.

Rayjay:Then what am I doing here?

Abnormal Dream Sequence

weird guy with hat: Let me tell you the details of this plan. *blah blah blah blah blah*

Rayjay, uterly bored, goes of to get some lunch while the weird guy with hat talks to himself.

Disturbing Dream Sequence

Rayjay: I am back.

weird guy with hat: Where did you go? Oh well. I already explained the plans for elemanating the moon.

Rayjay: what is that?

weird guy with hat: I am going to send you. You can use your experience to tell the team what to do.

Rayjay: that wont take long...

weird guy with hat: Bruce Willis will also be there. He will use his magical Bruce Willis powers to help you. And he has a big drill that you can use.

Really Funky Dream Sequence

weird guy with hat: Jackie Chan will be there too. M.C.Hammer will be there as a source of light. His pants reflect any light. Mr.T will be there to beat up anyone who gets in his way. Duffman will be there to supply the booze.

Rayjay: So when do we start?

weird guy with hat: *frustrating groan* RIGHT NOW!

Uncanny Dream Sequence

With that, the rocket ship goes to the moon, and everyone gets out.

M.C.Hammer: Its Hammer Time.

Rayjay: Be quiet. We have to blow up the moon.

BruceWillis: I could use my giant drill and drill a hole in the middle of the moon.

M.C.Hammer: What good will that do?

BruceWillis: I dont know, but it seems fun.

Duffman: Who wants some booze!?!

Rayjay: Im suronded by morons...

Mr.T punches Jackie Chan in the face

Confusing Dream Sequence

JackieChan: Why you punch me face miser tee?

Mr.T: Because I dont like the way you look at me.

JackieChan: Hows that?

Mr T. punches Jackie Chan again

Mr.T:That way.

BruceWillis: Hey guys, we can use this man's fruit to blow up the moon!

Rayjay: Now how would that work exactly?

BruceWillis: Well you always say you can do strange things with your fruit.

M.C.Hammer and Duffman are already passed out from drinking so Mr.T hurls them into the sun

Deranged Dream Sequence

Rayjay: Did that guy say you had magical powers, Bruce Willis?

BruceWillis: Yes. I can bring one person from anywhere here.

JackieChan: Who this person be?

BruceWillis: I dont know. I can only send out one person to help us. And it can be anybody.

Rayjay: We need all the help we can get.

BruceWillis: Okay. SUMMONING!!!

A cloud of smoke appears, and everyone goes over to see who Bruce Willis has summoned.

Unusual Dream Sequence

A could of smoke clears as it appears that Bruce Willis has summoned King Henry VIII

KingHenryVIII: What is all this going on?

Rayjay: We need to blow up the moon and it appears that you have come.

KingHenryVIII:Why would we want to do that?

JackieChan: Because we need to stop moon from hiting planet.

Mr.T punches Jackie Chan again.

BruceWillis: I can summon one more person. But it will kill me. I hope it is better than this guy.

Rayjay: Anyones better than King Henry VIII.

Some more smoke appears and out comes Burnt Renolds

Oddball Dream Sequence

Burnt Renolds comes in eating a bucket of beans

BurntRenolds: What am I doing here?

Rayjay: You have been summoned to blow up the moon.

BurntRenolds: Blow up the moon?

Rayjay: Yes, blow up the moon.

KingHenryVIII: Ah... those beans look good.

BurntRenolds: So how are we going to blow up the moon?

Rayjay: We dont know yet.

JackieChan: How bout using this moon bomb they sent us?

Rayjay: Moon bomb?

Mr.T: Shut up Chan. *punches Chan* Someone has to detonate this bomb by means of kicking it.

Dysfuntional Dream Sequence

KingHenryVIII: That bomb looks mighty tasty...

King Herny VIII eats the bomb. The bomb explodes but does not seem to hurt him

KingHenryVIII: Whats for desert?

Rayjay: You just ate a bomb.

KingHenryVIII: I know. Whats for desert?

Rayjay: Have some fruit.

KingHenryVIII: Get in your thing that takes you back to the planet. I will get rid of the moon in my own way.

Mr.T: How will you do that?

KingHenryVIII: I will eat it.

Abnormal Dream Sequence

And so with that, King Henry VIII ate the moon and complained that it was not a good cheese. He has gotten so fat that he has replaced the moon. And if you try to talk to him he may say hello, but he will try to take your sandwich.

The End