
Many a strange thing has happened before in your town. But nothing will ever prepare you for the frightening tale of...
A man wanders the streets looking for a place to sleep. He sees a small town in the distance. He enters the town, walks near a pay phone and it starts to ring. Confused, the man walks to it and answers it.
Man: Hello? Is this the phone that rings?
After that a trio of small bloody uh...things attacks him for no reason
Man: Agh!!!
After that he wakes up in a school
Man: That was odd. Maybe I was dreaming. But it was a dream, then where is it the phone?
The man finds a jar of mustard on the floor
Man: There is a jar of mustard. Should I take it?
The man takes it
Inventory
Jar of Mustard
Man: This mustard looks yellow. It must be very strange...
The man looks around to find that he is in a classroom
Man: Teachers are teached to teach in teaching where they are taught. Maybe I can too.
The man finds a book on karate on one of the desks
Man: There is a book of karate. Should I take it?
The man takes the book of karate
Inventory
Jar of Mustard
Book of Karate
Man: Perhaps if I read it I may become an expert in karate. I will have to remind myself later to read the book of karate later.
The man walks out of the classroom and into the halls where he finds another door that leads out of the strange school. He exits the school and enters the streets. There is a strge amount of fog everywhere he looks and can't see more than a few feet foward.
Man: I should have a flashlight handy. Such a handy tool is destined for great handiness. Perhaps there is one somewhere around the city.
The man finds a map of the city on the ground.
Man: There is a map of the city. Should I take it?
The man takes the map of the city.
Man: Now with this marker that I just happen to have I will mark a random place on my map. This will be where I will find the usefull tool of handiness.
The man marks the grocery store on the map.
Man: Now if I can get past this fog, I can go to the store. That reminds me, I do not remember this town from a past. I know the name of the town I need to.
The man finds a dead battery on the floor.
Man: There is a dead battery. Should I take it?
The man takes the dead battery.
Inventory
Jar of Mustard
Book of Karate
Dead Battery
Man: It is a good thing I was trained to carry more items that the average man. If not for this, I would be.
The man walks to the supermarket and finds a cowboy zombie with a gun. The coyboy zombie shoots his gun but no bullets are in it.
Man: This is a desparate situation. If I were to read the book of karate, I would be an expert.
The man reads the book of karate.
Man: I eat breakfast like you.
The man kills the zombie in one well placed hip thrust. After that he walks foward in the town not seeing a thing until he spots an old pair of wooden teeth.
Man: There is a pair of wooden teeth here. Should I take it?
The man takes the pair of wooden teeth.
Inventory
Jar of Mustard
Dead Battery
Wooden Teeth
Man: Teeth made of wood are not made out of steel. But if they are not, then how will they do it? Perhaps the store will answer the question and answer it.
After many seconds, the man reaches the store but finds it to be locked.
Man: A locked store will require a master of unlocking. For this task, I need an unlocker.
The man marks the Retirement Home on his map.
Man: This next stop will have to be my next stop. It will aid me in things other than many.
Turning around, the man finds a small bottle on the ground.
Man: I do not know what this is. It somehow has the power to greater health. If I take it then I too will have health that it great. For this, I will call it Health Drink even though it looks poison. There is a Health Drink here. Should I take it?
The man takes the Health Drink. He then walks to the Retirement Home and finds a broken battery powered electronic door handle.
Man: This handle is battery powered but it is also broken. I cannot fix it. But if the handle is broken and battery powered, then a broken battery has the power to work. I will try it.
The man puts the dead battey in the broken door handle and it opens up.
Man: Opens the door. Good idea seems right? Sure.
The man walks in. He enters one of the rooms and finds a piano, an accordian, and a book. First he reads the book.
Man: This book says, "Elise had always wanted to play the accordian but was never able to. Franklin is on the $100 bill. Black will kill you. And so Elise XXXXXXX.
The man puts the book down.
Man: The rest of the book can been censored. There are 7 Xs. A 7 letter word is "polkaed". Meaning to polka.
The man takes the Accordian and plays a polka on it. This makes the piano right next to it glow. After that, he plays a very difficult song to play on Piano, "For Elise" and plays it 100 times while skipping the black keys. A key falls next to the door.
Man: A key I see. Perhaps this key fits a lock?
The man walks up to the key.
Man: There is a key here. Should I take it?
The man takes the key.
Inventory
Jar of Mustard
Wooden Teeth
Key To Supermarket
Man: Now I will travel back to the market that is super.
The man walks back to the supermarket and uses the key. He then walks inside. It is very dark inside. He finds a flashlight.
Man: There is a flashlight here. Should I take it?
The man takes the flashlight.
Man: Now I can see even in the darkest of darks.
A mailman zombie jumps out from the darkness and throws a bunch of bills at the man.
Man: Oh no! Bills!
MailmanZombie: You... will... never... find out the secret... of Gusman Hill...
Man: He is right. For if I were trying to find out the secret I would still be searching. But I am just trying to leave.
MailmanZombie: You are? Well then... that proves that... you will never find... the secret...
The Mailman Zombie melts into the floor and leaves a shoe on the ground.
Man: This is no ordinary shoe. It is made out of a special thing. They are brown, so things that are brown must have been used in the making of this shoe.
He looks at the shoe some more.
Man: There is a shoe here. Should I take it?
The man takes the shoe.
Inventory
Jar of Mustard
Wooden Teeth
Brown Shoe
After that, the man comes across a long dark hall and walks down it. Now what a hall is doing in a supermarket is beyond me, but read on anyway. At the end of the long hall, there is a locked door with 2 other locked doors just before it on the left and right.
Man: The door in front is locked. A method to open the door seems in good health.
The man drinks the health drink and the 2 doors on the side open up. He then enters the one on the left. Inside is an electric generator.
Man: It looks like it genreates electricity. It could be helpful if I can get it to work if it is broken, or break it if it works.
The man leaves the room and enters the door on the right. It has a small table with a bucket of water on it. Something is written on the table with blood. The man reads it.
Man: It says, "If you can generate all the brown you need, wood will turn to steel and a new path will be opened." This seems farily obvious.
The man places the wooden teeth in the bucket of water. He then walks back to the generator room and throws the brown shoe inside. The generator starts to generate something, but not electricity. The man walks back to the room with the table and looks inside the bucket of water. The water in no longer there, and the wooden teeth have been replaced with steel teeth.
Inventory
Jar of Mustard
Steel Teeth
The man walks back to the hall and places the steel teeth on the knob. The steel teeth bite the knob and it falls of, opening the door.
Man: What waits for me on the other side? A way out?
The man enters the door and finds a new room. A giant bear/fish/goat/lizard/turtle thing starts to attack him for no reason.
Man: This seems to go beyond my advanced karate expertism.
Running away, the man finds a sandwich table in which he can make a sandwich. He quickly uses the jar of mustard and makes a mustard sandwich.
Man: Now with this I will see how mustard can do it to the thing and right it will be for mustard.
The monster advances closely to the man who throws the mustard sandwich into the monster's mouth. The monster chokes on it and dies.
Man: That is perfect for me. What a truly shockening experience for me. I am glad that I did not lose my liver, or my life.
The Mailman Zombie returns.
Man: Hello there. Are you the one who is to show me the way out now?
MailmanZombie: But... you... were not... supposed to live... someday... we will... get our... our... our...
Man: Get yours? I am sure that you will get it someday. Ha heh ha he ho. Get it? It is a laugh.
The man is surronded in fog, and wakes in in his bed.
Man: Was that it all there was to it? A dream is all it must have been.
Man: I have to drive to the store for some egg goods so that I can have it my breakfast.
While driving near a cliff, the man gets a sharp pain in his stomach.
Man: This pain is what is making me hurt. It is because I am hungry.
The man sees a dog on the road. He does not want to hit it so he swirves off the road... and off a cliff.
Man: AGGGGGHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!
ZombieMailman: get our...