Chapter One-The Antagonist "Nobody, but nobody pushes me around."-Reno Lynley
Chapter Two-That's an Ouch "Are you looking for a fight? If you are, I'll sure as hell give it to you!"-Blonde boy
Chapter 3-The Great Escape "Your choices are electrocution, gunshot wounds, or, best--or maybe worst--of all, I can keep talking!"-Reno Lynley
Chapter 4-Revealing Secrets "I'm wishing for once that I had Rude's linguistic skills."-Reno Lynley
Chapter 5-A Better Idea!...Maybe "You call this a better idea?"-Dinah Selby
Chapter 6-Turks' Pride "A night with me is something you’ll remember all your life!"-Reno Lynley
Chapter 7-A Rude Awakening "Nice try, Nancy Drew." --gang member
Chapter 8-Chocobo Excrement and Wonder Woman "You’re not the only one who can pick locks, dearie."-Dinah Selby
Chapter 9-The Humor of the Situation "The bitch is back."-Reno Lynley
Chapter 10-Crystal Snowflakes He's my brother and he was flirting with me!"-Kiyara Maiden
Chapter 11-To Each His Own: Part 1"Figures. Wherever Reno goes, you find trouble."-Faye Texiera
Chapter 12-To Each His Own: Part 2 "Harry Potter, here I come!"-Elena Sader
Chapter 13-A Big Rascal "Aww, you killed the cowlick? You were such a cute little rascal."-Kiyara Maiden
Chapter 14-A Freight Train Named Tifa "You talk anymore, Lynley, and I let Tifa snap your neck!"-Cid Highwind
Chapter 15-Memories of a Melody "Yeah, we'll be fine as long as we don't kill each other."-Kiyara Maiden
Chapter 16-Merrily We Go Insane "Just couldn't stay away from me, huh?"-Reno Lynley
Chapter 17-Rough Waves, Rough Politics, Rough People "You big wussies."-Elena Sader
Chapter 18-What the Hell?! "Damn, Shera, that’s one hell of a gun!"-Cid Highwind
Chapter 19-Miraculous Resurrections and Appearances "Insolent sniveling wretch!"-Amaani Hojo
Chapter 20-The End of a Confrontation "Amaani seems to have a great fondness for kicking and stabbing."-Faye Texiera
Chapter 21-War and Gore "I'd like to hear you tell me that your problem is more important than the return of Sephiroth."-Reeve Kazuma
Chapter 22-A Bit of Harmless Fluff "The Mako cannon is being brought out to the car."-Kiyara Maiden
Chapter 23-More Like Shallow World "It's like he chopped off her head and stuffed it in a drainpipe."-Elena Sader
Chapter 24-Smiles, Glares, and Confusion "Looks like somebody's gonna be scrounging through Faye's closet again."-Reno Lynley
Chapter 25-A Regular Soap Opera "I taste like barf!"-Tifa Lockheart
Chapter 26-The Calm Before the Storm "She said that you're a good dog and you smell like burning cheese."-Nanaki, son of Seto
Chapter 27-White Out "Hey Reeve, for a politician, you suck at lying."-Reno Lynley
Chapter 28-Last Bastion of Safety "And by 'some poor jackass' and 'fall' I assume you mean Strife when you push him in."-Kiyara Maiden
April Fools Interlude: Chapter 19-Confrontations "I got kissed by a fuckin' guy!"-Reno Lynley