MARIO and HEATHER start off in the ring as the bell sounds, starting the match. MARIO and HEATHER circle each other for a few seconds, HEATHER finally going in for the lock up. As MARIO goes to lock up with HEATHER, she quickly moves behind MARIO and grabs around his waist. Putting her foot in front of MARIO’S, HEATHER pushes him forward, sending him to the ground with a front drop. HEATHER stands to her feet, MARIO getting to his own. Circling each other again, MARIO goes for the lock up, once more HEATHER going behind him and locking around his waist. MARIO quickly counters though this time by moving around HEATHER and lifting her in the air. Falling backwards, MARIO plants HEATHER with a back body drop. Covering her, MARIO goes for the pin. 1… 2… Kickout! HEATHER is brought to her feet with MARIO’S help as he makes it to his. Whipping HEATHER into the ropes, MARIO takes her down with a shoulder charge, quickly following up with an elbow drop to the collarbone. MARIO goes for the pin again. 1… 2… Kickout! Lifting HEATHER to her feet again, MARIO whips her into the corner, her back hitting hard. Charging at HEATHER, MARIO finds himself getting a face full of her boot as she brings it up in the last second, sending MARIO spiraling backwards. HEATHER climbs to the second turnbuckle as MARIO turns around. HEATHER jumps from the middle turnbuckle, dropping MARIO with a dropkick to the head. HEATHER quickly recovers and goes for the pin. 1… 2… Kickout!! Lifting MARIO to his feet, HEATHER whips him to her corner and goes for the tag. As CHERRY gets into the ring, both ladies begin to stomp into MARIO’S gut, quickly pushing him down to a sitting position. CHERRY brings her foot to MARIO’S throat then, cutting off the air as the ref tells her to stop and goes for the five-count. On three, CHERRY lets loose of the choke and brings MARIO to his feet. Going to whip him into the ropes, MARIO counters and pulls CHERRY’S body close to his, dropping her with a huge clothesline. Falling to one knee, MARIO walks in the direction of his side, looking for the tag but doesn’t find MIKE D there! Looking around, MARIO spots MIKE D totally out of position! MARIO walks over to side of the ring MIKE D was on, a furious look on his face. MARIO starts yelling at MIKE D, getting his attention while CHERRY takes the opportunity and rolls MARIO up into a schoolboy. 1… 2… KICKOUT! MARIO quickly gets to his feet, a look of shock in his face as he kicks CHERRY in the gut and lands a DDT. Looking over at his side, he sees MIKE D had returned and goes for the tag. Having a few words with MIKE D, MARIO goes to the outside while MIKE D gets in, a cocky smirk upon his face as he walks over to the down CHERRY. MIKE D kicks the downed CHERRY a few times, the cocky smirk still on his face as he lifts her up, soon dropping her again with a suplex. Sitting up slowly, MIKE D waits a few seconds before going for the pin… 1… 2… KICKOUT!!! MIKE D shrugs as he stands and brings CHERRY to her feet. Kicking her in the stomach again, MIKE D sets her up for a DANGEROUS DRIVER!!! HEATHER comes flying in from behind, nailing MIKE D in the back of the head, causing him to stumble forward. CHERRY uses the momentum to lift MIKE D onto her shoulder and both HEATHER and CHERRY deliver a double spine buster to MIKE D!!!! CHERRY quickly hooks MIKE D’S leg, going for the pin! ONE!!! TWO!!! TH--KICKOUT! MIKE D quickly stumbles to his feet, a dazed look on his face as he turns around, being quickly booted in the stomach by CHERRY, who drops MIKE D with a swinging neckbreaker. Both are out in the ring as CHERRY slowly makes it to her feet, MIKE D crawling to his corner of the ring. CHERRY makes the tag as MIKE D reaches out to MARIO… but NO ONE’S THERE! MIKE D looks around to see where MARIO was and finds him away from the ring, hanging by the announce table!! MIKE D IS GETTING A TASTE OF HIS OWN MEDICINE! Getting to his feet irate, MIKE D tries to get MARIO’S attention, but finds a boot in his back instead, sending him face first into the turnbuckle. Stumbling backwards, MIKE D watches as CHERRY runs at him, dropping him to the ground with a reverse bulldog! Standing to his feet in blind shock, CHERRY leads MIKE D to the turnbuckle, sitting on it as she grabs his head. Jumping from the turnbuckle, CHERRY plants MIKE D with a huge tornado DDT, using the extra momentum to float over MIKE D and HOOK HIS LEG!!! MARIO SLIDES INTO THE RING SEEING IT!!! 1.. 2.. THREE!!!

WINNERS: HEATHER HALLIWELL & CHERRY

''Cherry Pie ''By Warrant blasts through The Ford Center in Oklahoma City! CHERRY and HEATHER HALLIWELL celebrate in the ring! The crowd goes wild! HEATHER walks over and grabs a microphone.

HEATHER: I must say it great to be back! I’m really excited to be here! The XWF has given me a lot of great memories! I hope to make more!

The crowd goes nuts! HEATHER hands the mic over to CHERRY.

CHERRY: Hello Oklahoma City! I’m have to say it’s a beautiful night here in Oklahoma City! I am really looking forward to successfully teaming with HEATHER again at Autumn In Hell! Speaking of Autumn In Hell... HEATHER and I guarantee a win! HEATHER and I will beat 504 BOY and that tramp he calls his fiancée! We will also beat EXTERMINATOR and CHASM! We will become the #1 contenders for the Tag Team Titles! We will go on to face MC TERRIBLE and THE SAVIOR and become the champs! I can’t wait to get my hands on JEN JETSON! She has something coming to her...

Before CHERRY could finish what she was saying, JEN JETSON’s music started blasting through the arena and She and 504 BOY came out from backstage. JEN had a mic in her hand! She doesn’t even walk all the way down to the ring. She looks over at 504 BOY and grins.

JEN: You know you've got great plans, but I don’t see it happening! You see me and my man have plans to do the same! I can’t wait to get my hands on you either!

CHERRY: Why wait? Why don’t you come down to this ring and lets do this now! You say you cant wait well you won’t have to!

JEN looks shocked! She can’t believe what she’s hearing!

JEN: No, you don’t want me to, trust me!

HEATHER and CHERRY look at each other and then HEATHER takes the mic from CHERRY.

HEATHER: But if she didn’t want you to, she wouldn’t have told you! Come on JEN.. You’re not scared are you?

JEN laughs. She looks over a 504 BOY.

JEN: Ok you want me to come down there fine then you got it!

JEN turns around, hands the mic to 504 BOY and begins to walk down the rampway. She looks at CHERRY and HEATHER and then looks back at 504 BOY. JEN turns around and walks back up the rampway!

JEN takes the mic back from 504 BOY.

JEN: You know what, let’s save it for Autumn In Hell!

PREMIERE
vs.
MUNGBEAN
vs.
MINDFREAK
- - Elimination Match - -

The bell rings as PREMIERE looks on. MUNGBEAN and MINDFREAK start the battle between each other, exchanging rights and lefts. MUNGBEAN gains the advantage and drops MINDFREAK to the ground. He is about to follow up with a running knee drop, but it was then that PREMIERE entered the match. He bulldogs MUNGBEAN and then hits a falling headbutt to MINDFREAK. PREMIERE taunts the crowd, and doesn't realize that MUNGBEAN is back up. MUNGBEAN grabs PREMIERE and forces PREMIERE to turn around. MUNGBEAN releases fists of fury laying left and right after each other. PREMIERE tries to escape, but is met with a tackle by MINDFREAK. MINDFREAK holds PREMIERE as MUNGBEAN hits a huge running clothesline. PREMIERE crumples over onto the referee. The referee down, MINDFREAK quickly takes advantage of the situation. He slides out of the ring and grabs a trashcan full of weapons. He slides in, waiting no time. MUNGBEAN is waiting for him, but MINDFREAK dodges a superkick and when MUNGBEAN turns around is met with a steel chair to the forehead. MUNGBEAN drops down as PREMIERE starts to make his way to his feet, but falls victim to a chair shot as well. PREMIERE falls onto the referee causing the referee to hit the mat even harder, almost forcing the referee unconscious. MINDFREAK slides out of the ring again and grabs three tables. He enters the ring and sets PREMIERE onto the table. He then picks up MUNGBEAN and hits a hit Piledriver onto a garbage can lid, forcing MUNGBEAN's head to bounce off cold steel. He then climbs to the top rope and drops a huge elbow onto PREMIERE, sending PREMIERE crashing through the table. MUNGBEAN is next as MINDFREAK picks him up, and sends him crashing into another table, using a powerbomb The referee is gaining his composure! MINDFREAK drops his arm on his chest! The referee makes the count! 1…2… THREE!

MUNGBEAN is out!

PREMIERE and MINDFREAK circle each other in the ring, before MINDFREAK makes the tackle and starts struggling to gain a mat advantage over PREMIERE. PREMIERE is unable to fight MINDFREAK's advanced technical skills and quickly falls victim to an arm bar. PREMIERE struggles and tries to escape but MINDFREAK released him. As PREMIERE grabs his arm in pain, suddenly MINDFREAK drops an arm drop. PREMIERE yells in pain, unable to defend himself. MINDFREAK then runs to the ropes and hits a huge dropkick the same arm. It's obvious MINDFREAK has picked the arm as a target in the match. DARK MINDFREAK picks up PREMIERE and puts him into an arm twist. PREMIERE yells in pain, holding his arm as MINDFREAK turns it slowly, adding force to the move. MINDFREAK raises PREMIERE'S arm and then drops it straight onto his shoulder. PREMIERE falls to his back yelling and screaming in pain. MINDFREAK doesn't stop though and quickly moves in taking the arm of MINDFREAK and dragging him to the ropes. MINDFREAK wraps PREMIERE'S arm around the ropes then lifts on the ropes, as he pushes down on PREMIERE. PREMIERE screams in pain as his arm is being ripped out of his socket. The referee counts to four and MINDFREAK lets go of the move. He then picks up PREMIERE and whips him into the ropes with so much force that he drops to his stomach. PREMIERE flips over the top rope, but grabs it with his hands. However the damage on his arm causes him to let go quickly, dropping to the ground. PREMIERE starts to get to his feet and as he stumbles around he is met with a drop kick to his arm from MINDFREAK! DARK MINDFREAK slides out of the ring and throws PREMIERE into the ring. He then enters the ring and grabs PREMIERE'S bad arm. He jumps off the second rope, hitting a tornado arm bar. PREMIERE screams in pain as MINDFREAK locks in the armbar again. PREMIERE taps out, the pain too much to handle! MINDFREAK wins the final spot in the Hart Gauntlet at Autumn In Hell!

WINNER: MINDFREAK

In the back, CYREN is looking concerned.. 504 BOY sees him again, and sees the almost trance-like look on his face..

504 BOY: Hey, CYREN.. What up?

CYREN does not respond.

504 BOY: HEY! WHAT THE HELL? YOU ALIVE?

CYREN’s eyes glaze over, and he turns, almost robot-like, to face 504 BOY..

CYREN: Something is very wrong.. There’s an evil presence among us.

504 BOY looks baffled.

504 BOY: Evil presence? Listen, Obi Wan, I don’t know what kind of trip you’re on, but I’m here to win a wrestling match tonight, and I need you FOCUSED, buddy? I mean, you’re a great wrestler and all that, but I can’t have you going all “Yoda” on me! I can’t carry you through a match with STAR and SMITTY. Snap out of it, pal!

CYREN: There is danger afoot. Grave danger…

504 BOY throws his hands up in the air and turns around.

504 BOY: Screw it. Do me a favor and figure out whatever you need to figure out tonight, because if you ain’t focused, I DON’T GET A WIN.. And I NEED THAT WIN, pal.

CYREN: Grave danger..

504 BOY walks away in a huff as CYREN looks toward the sky..

CYREN: Show yourself to me.. Face me..

CYREN’s pupils dilate and he falls into a trance-like state as the camera zooms in on his face…

REQUESTS ARE BEING TAKEN NOW FOR YOUR OWN CUSTOM XWF GEAR!

XWF SHOP! It‛s REAL!

TONY CAPRETTI & HELMUT BLOK
vs.
DEANO THE DESTROYER & BONECRUSHER
- - X-Treme Tag Match - -

Both CAPRETTI and HELMUT are down in the ring with the referee making sure they stay off to one side when DEANO and BONECRUSHER hit the ramp. They come running down to the ring with steel chairs in hand as the do. With them sliding into the ring, CAPRETTI and HELMUT slide out of the ring. Finally, the ref is able to have both members get into their neutral corner as CAPRETTI and HELMUT get back in. HELMUT and DEANO are the first two people to start off in the ring. The ref then starts the match as DEANO and HELMUT try psyching one another out until DEANO finally just up and slaps HELMUT! DEANO then before HELMUT can react, bum rushes HELMUT and grabs a hold of his arm only to then Irish whip him across the ring. From bouncing off the ropes and coming back DEANO hip tosses HELMUT. HELMUT quickly gets back up again and charges at DEANO only to get hip tossed again! HELMUT once more gets back up shaking it off and comes charging at DEANO to this time be hip tossed but DEANO does not let go this time around. Instead, he flips around HELMUT'S arm and drops down with a standing leg drop across HELMUT'S chest. DEANO then right away applies an armbar while now down on the mat. HELMUT then struggles not to tap out as he fights his way over to the ropes finally grabbing up the bottom rope at the last. The ref the starts up his 4-count as DEANO lets go. With HELMUT favoring his arm though, DEANO quickly walks over grabbing up HELMUT'S hurting arm and spins it around while yanking HELMUT down to one knee. BONECRUSHER then reaches in and tags himself in as he takes a running start jumping and landing with an elbow down onto the hurting shoulder of HELMUT. BONECRUSHER then pulls HELMUT up to his feet and hooks him as he nails a perfect suplex. BONECRUSHER then rolls out of the ring grabbing up one of the steel folding chairs and rolls back into the ring. He drags HELMUT over as he then sets his arm in it. BONECRUSHER then walks back climbing up to the second rope and looks down laughing at HELMUT mocking him and his pain. He then jumps off while landing and stomping on the steel folding chair! HELMUT screams out in pain as BONECRUSHER then drops down and makes a cover. 1......2..... and CAPRETTI with the save! The ref then makes sure that CAPRETTI gets back into his neutral corner as DEANO jumps back in to stomp on HELMUT'S injured arm a couple of times only to roll right back out as the ref turns back around. BONECRUSHER then picks up and hurting HELMUT favoring his shoulder and arm and Irish whips him hard into the steel ringpost. Upon getting there, CAPRETTI tags himself in without BONECRUSHER knowing it. And with HELMUT laying up in the ringpost, BONECRUSHER comes running across only to be head butted in the gut from the outside by CAPRETTI. CAPRETTI then grabs and hooks BONECRUSHER'S head as he signals to the crowd. He then with all his might lifts BONECRUSHER and suplexes him to the outside!!!! The crowd pops as this happens. CAPRETTI then hops down and grabs a hold of BONECRUSHER picking him up to his feet as DEANO comes running around and clotheslines the hell out of CAPRETTI!!! DEANO then grabs a hold of the other steel chair, places it under CAPRETTI’S neck, and slams it down hard! HELMUT jumps off the top rope taking both DEANO and BONECRUSHER down in sacrificing himself! The ref looks down as...... the lights go out. The crowd is in a roaring scream, as a black mass runs down the ramp, and slides into the ring. The figure pulls HELMUT out of the ring, dragging him by the hair into the steel stairs! HELMUT can be heard screaming over the crowd's commotion! The figure picks up HELMUT, standing on a table by the crowd barricade..... SLAM! HELMUT has been powerbombed through the table! The figure stands, the lights returning to see who it is..

BRIAN LANCE! It’s BRIAN LANCE! We haven’t seen him in the XWF in YEARS!!

BRIAN LANCE grabs a hold of the fallen HELMUT, and rolls him back into the ring. BRIAN LANCE smiles sadistically, as he heads back up the ramp to the stage. DEANO has stood by now, shrugging as he covers HELMUT 1..... 2.... THREE!!! BRIAN LANCE has ruined the match for CAPRETTI and HELMUT!! What could have possibly brought this upon the returning BRIAN LANCE!?

WINNERS: DEANO THE DESTROYER & BONECRUSHER

TONY CAPRETTI stands in the ring opposite DEANO as HELMUT BLOK rolls out of the ring and BONECRUSHER has made his way backstage. TONY stares a whole through DEANO as DEANO does the same to his former mentor. The fans begin to cheer in anticipation as it looks like both men are about to explode. Suddenly several cops begin making there way down to the outside of the ring as TONY grabs a microphone off of the ring announcer.

TONY: Nice one, DEANO? You get some washed up turd like BRIAN LANCE to come in and ruin my final match on MASSACRE? You trying to distract me from the obvious issue here? Well NICE TRY! You thought I was gonna let you get away with wrecking my apartment? NUH UH!! You broke into and trashed my apartment and I believe that's GROUNDS FOR ARREST.

TONY smiles as three officers enter the ring and go to handcuff DEANO, but DEANO begins to attack the officers as TONY rolls out of the ring and grabs a chair. DEANO nails all off the officers as they all come at him when TONY sneaks up behind him and...WHACK!! TONY blasted DEANO over the head with that chair, as the chair bends in half from the impact. DEANO drops to the amt as one of the officers gets up and immediately handcuffs the semi-conscious DEANO. All three officers escort DEANO from the ring as TONY grabs the microphone again.

TONY: You're an idiot DEANO. You'll never even make it to Autumn in Hell at this rate. You stupid son of a bitch.

TONY laughs as DEANO is taken away by the cops.

TONY: Oh wait, before I forget. This is my last Massacre show before I make the jump to Anarchy.

The fans all begin to boo.

TONY: It's strictly business. I gotta join my guys on Anarchy to start making some real noise. Don’t get me wrong though. Massacre will always be my home, but you don't stay at home for your entire life do you? I will be back one day. Until that day does come, I wanna say thank you. Thank you to all of you fans out there who have supported me throughout my Massacre career and thank you to all you guys in the back who have faced me, wins and losses. Last off, JONA-NICOLE... F*** YOU!!

TONY drops the microphone and makes his way backstage to cheers from the fans in attendance.

HARDCORE SMITTY & STAR
vs.
CYREN & 504 BOY
- - Standard Tag Match - -

As the match is set to begin, CYREN seems to be almost on autopilot, merely going through the motions. 504 BOY is visibly concerned. HE tries to snap him out of it by literally pushing CYREN toward SMITTY, who simply pops him in the jaw. CYREN doesn’t react at all, as the ref splits both teams up. After a quick shout at CYREN, 504 BOY and SMITTY end up being in the squared circle. CYREN looks to have regained a bit of his concentration. As the bell rings, 504 BOY runs to SMITTY, and drop kicks over the ropes! As SMITTY smacks the concrete floor, he has the wind knocked out of him! STAR slips in the ring, and pulls off a hard clothesline across the chest of 504 BOY! CYREN quickly jumps in, and puts a flying forearm in the face of STAR! The ref pushes CYREN out, as STAR rolls out of the ring, SMITTY slips back inside WITH A CHAIR! AS THE REF IS TURNED TO CYREN, AND 504 BOY IS SLOWLY RISING, SMITTY SMACKS 504 BOY IN THE HEAD, AND THROWS THE CHAIR OUT OF THE RING, AS THE REF TURNS BACK TO THE MATCH! SMITTY GOES FOR THE COVER, 1..2..KICK OUT! SMITTY JUMPS UP, AND BEGINS STOMPING 504 BOY, WHO IS NOW BLEEDING FROM THE HEAD! 504 BOY springs up, and executes a hard full nelson slam on SMITTY! STAR jumps back onto the apron, and catches 504 BOY’S eye, which stalks to the corner, but is caught with an unnoticed low blow, from SMITTY! STAR reaches her arm out for the tag, but SMITTY seems as if he is trying not to! SMITTY finally gives in, and tags STAR, who slips through the ropes, and begins stomping 504 BOY! STAR lifts 504 BOY up, only to be power bombed to the mat! 504 BOY runs to his corner, and quickly tags the fresh partner! CYREN leaps over the ropes to the inside! 504 BOY slowly rises, and runs to the corner! 504 BOY JUMPS THROUGH THE ROPES, AND SPEARS SMITTY TO THE OUTSIDE! BOTH MEN ARE OUT ON THE OUTSIDE! CYREN begins to lift STAR, but catches a low blow, as the REF is turned watching 504 BOY and SMITTY on the outside! STAR puts CYREN in a well-performed Hurricanrana! CYREN lands hard, as STAR jumps to her feet! The crowd goes into frenzy! CYREN jumps up, and boots STAR in the stomach, following with a DDT! 504 BOY lifts SMITTY on the outside, and throws him into the turnbuckle post! SMITTY SMACKS HEAD FIRST, AND FLIPS BEFORE SMACKING THE CONCRETE! CYREN takes the protector off the turnbuckle, then lifts STAR off the mat! As CYREN walks STAR to the corner, STAR SLAMS CYREN HEAD FIRST INTO THE UNCOVERED TURNBUCKLE! CYREN IS BUSTED OPEN! STAR GOES FOR THE PIN, 1..2..CYREN LANDS A FOOT ON THE BOTTOM ROPE! CYREN SPRINGS UP WITH A BURST OF ENERGY, AND LIFTS STAR OVER HIS HEAD, AND DROPS HER FACE FIRST INTO THE TURNBUCKLE! STAR BOUNCES OFF, AND HITS THE MAT! CYREN LIFTS STAR BACK UP, AND SLAMS HER HEAD INTO THE TURNBUCKLE AGAIN! STAR IS BLEEDING! CYREN LIFTS HER INTO A BODY PRESS, AND THROWS HER HIGH IN THE AIR, AS SHE COMES BACK DOWN, SHE SLAMS FLAT INTO THE RING! CYREN RUNS TO THE CORNER, AND TAGS 504 BOY IN! 504 BOY jumps in, and places his foot on STAR’S face, and uses the ropes for pressure, as CYREN stands back up, SMITTY pulls him off! CYREN turns, and begins punching SMITTY! 504 BOY lifts STAR, but catches a boot to the mid section! STAR lands a DDT and goes to the top rope!! SPARKLING INTUITION!! SHE GOES FOR THE PIN! 1.. 2.. THREE!!! STAR AND SMITTY PULL OUT THE WIN! STAR RAISES TO HER KNEES AS SHE BLEEDS FROM THE FOREHEAD!

WINNERS: HARDCORE SMITTY & STAR

After STAR helps SMITTY to his feet and soaks in the crowd’s affection, CYREN is left alone in the ring after the match has ended. He seems to still be in his nearly hypnotic state, feeling something that isn’t right in the building…

Suddenly, a deep, electronically altered voice invades the PA system, stopping CYREN in his tracks..

I want you to know that I looked up to you... You made me who I am... You helped me to accept the darkness into my heart. When everyone else turned their backs on you.. I was the only one who shouted your name to the heavens. And now... I don't even recognize you. I thought I would be able to move on while you continued your work, but seeing what you've become... I can no longer lurk in the shadows. I have to save you before you destroy yourself any further. Because of you... Darkness will finally return to XWF... I'll see you soon...

CYREN looks concerned, as his fears were justified.. He heads to the back without a word..

FINALLY, THE WORLD CHAMPION WILL BE CROWNED....
SUNDAY

The show returns from commercial with the crowd anticipating the next match, but suddenly, the SIMPLE LIFE theme hits the PA, and here comes JONATHYN! He looks thin and pale, and he’s wearing a TON of eyeliner! He’s still convinced he’s NICOLE RICHIE! The crowd cheers the fact that he’s actually wearing pants and not a skirt this week, as JONATHYN climbs into the ring with a microphone.

JONATHYN: Okay you guys.. I’m like, in charge of this place, right? So then how come I don’t know what this “exorcism” thing is all about? I just found out that there’s an exorcism planned.. On ME?.. at Autumn In Hell next week, and I’m like “What’s up with that?” Could somebody explain that to me?.. I mean, what the hell? Is that like some wrestling thing? Because last time I checked, exorcisms were something you did to people that were like possessed by the devil and stuff..

The crowd continues to watch as JONATHYN waits for a response from somebody..

JONATHYN: Okay, whatever. Look, I’m running the XWF, and that’s just the way it is. I won this place in a poker game, I think, and I was REALLY drunk at the time, so I don’t even know who I won it from, but whatever, okay? So since this is MY company, I can do whatever I want, right? So that’s why I’ve decided that I want..

Suddenly, a huge pyro explosion hits the stage, and JONATHYN rushes out of the ring in fear. Music hits the PA that nobody’s ever heard before! What’s going on!!..




Suddenly, a figure bounds out of the smoke!

It’s MYSTIC J! We haven’t seen MYSTIC J in the XWF in ages either! JONATHYN pokes his head up from behind the ring and sees MYSTIC J standing on the ramp.

MYSTIC J: You have GOT to be kidding me! JONATHYN! BOSS!! LOOK AT YOURSELF!!

JONATHYN looks around, trying to figure out why every calls him JONATHYN.

MYSTIC J: DUDE! For real! I mean, you can’t HONESTLY look in the mirror and say to yourself, “Oh yeah, I’m a bi-racial blonde chick with a show on E! who’s friends with Paris Hilton..” Come on! YOU AIN’T NICOLE, BUDDY!

JONATHYN gets angry and crawls back into the ring, adjusting his bra underneath his shirt..

MYSTIC J: I mean, LOOK AT YOU! You’re a DUDE, dude!

JONATHYN looks at MYSTIC J and lifts his mic.

JONATHYN: I AM SO NICOLE RICHIE, and this is MY SHOW! YOU CAN’T COME INTO MY SHOW AND TELL ME WHO I AM!

MYSTIC J: Okay, BROWN.. Reality time. Do me a favor… Kids, I’m sorry you have to be witness to this, but it has to be done.. JONATHYN.. Sorry, NICOLE. Do me a favor.

JONATHYN: I’M NOT DOING ANY FAVORS FOR YOU, JUST GET OUT OF MY- -

MYSTIC J: Whoa, whoa, son. This one’s easy.. Just do this for me, and for yourself.. Look up at the X-Tron.. What do you see?

JONATHYN looks up and sees the camera shot of himself.

JONATHYN: I see ME. What’s your point?

MYSTIC J: Do you see NICOLE RICHIE?

JONATHYN: YES!! I JUST SAID THAT!

MYSTIC J: Okay. How about NOW? What do you see?

The shot changes to a split shot of JONATHYN live in the ring, and a recent publicity shot of the real NICOLE RICHIE.

JONATHYN: Okay! I see me TWICE!

MYSTIC J: Do you? You don’t find it at all odd that one of “you” weights about a hundred pounds more and has a full beard?

The crowd laughs out loud as JONATHYN continues to not see any differences.

JONATHYN: Look, pal. I’ve had about enough of this. As the owner of this company, I can have you escorted out of here, and that’s exactly - -

MYSTIC J: Okay, do me ONE MORE little favor. Take off your pants..

JONATHYN: WHAT? F*** YOU! I’M NOT TAKING MY PANTS OFF!!

MYSTIC J: Dude. You want to convince me you’re NICOLE RICHIE? Drop your pants and we’ll see.

JONATHYN: You know what? I think these fans might need a little more skin on this show.. You guys want to see me in my panties?

Half the fans scream NO while some are just enjoying the bit so much they can’t help but scream for the owner of the company to drop his pants just because some wrestler asked him to. MYSTIC starts chuckling to himself..

MYSTIC J: Sounds like they want this to! Let’s see those panties!

JONATHYN: Fine! Feast your eyes!!

JONATHYN unbuttons his slacks and lets them fall to the floor, revealing a pink pair of lace panties, hairy legs, and a pretty obvious bulge. The crowd reacts with a simultaneous gag reflex.

JONATHYN: There! You like?

MYSTIC J: Okay.. Now NICOLE.. Before you mercifully put your pants back on, I’d like you to do ONE MORE thing..

JONATHYN, feeling more comfortable with his pants off, listens intently.

JONATHYN: What’s that?

MYSTIC J: Just.. Pull them out a little bit and take a look “downstairs..” Tell me what you see..

The crowd can’t believe it! MYSTIC J just asked the boss of the company to look down his own shorts and describe the contents! JONATHYN looks at MYSTIC for a moment and AGREES! He pulls his waistband out a bit and is quite obviously looking at his “junk”.. He examines it for moment and then let’s go and lifts his mic again..

JONATHYN: Well, from the look of it, SOMEBODY just got a Brazilian!

MYSTIC J: OH! DUDE!! Are you telling me you actually made some poor fool WAX YOU down there!! Wait, wait.. You don’t see the.. You don’t see the “business?” The twig and berries? The meat and two veg? The wedding tackle? Come on, man! You got a SLHONG, DUDE!!

JONATHYN gets angry and quickly puts his pants back on.

JONATHYN: How DARE you! You know what? I’m in NO MOOD to have you come in and insult me like this, and I’m going to PUNISH YOU! You want to see me stripped down to my panties just to get your jollies!!! Well this SUNDAY, HOW ABOUT YOU TAKE ON SOMEONE IN A BRA-AND-PANTIES match! YEAH! YOU have to wear a bra and panties under your clothes! IMAGINE THAT!! A MAN wearing a BRA and PANTIES!! That would be so humiliating, it would be HILARIOUS!!

MYSTIC J: Yeah.. It has been so far..

The crowd laughs.

MYSTIC J: So okay.. You want to put me in a Bra-and-Panties match.. Fine.. Who will I be facing?

JONATHYN: Um.. You’ll be facing.. MATT LANES!!

MYSTIC J: Nope. HE quit.

JONATHYN: He did? Oh.. Then you’ll be facing.. Massacre’s newest member, JOSH HUDSON!!

MYSTIC J: Nope. He got fired last week by CRIMSON KLINE.

JONATHYN: What? He did? Alright then.. Prepare yourself for.. ANDREW GIBSON!!!

MYSTIC J: Nope. Fired.

JONATHYN gets angry..

JONATHYN: ANUBIS?

MYSTIC J: Gone.

JONATHYN: SEXTON MAXIMO?

MYSTIC J: Never showed up.

JONATHYN: KLUMINATIE?

MYSTIC J: Got lost on the way to the arena. Hasn’t been seen in weeks.

JONATHYN: ALIX MARGERA?

MYSTIC J: Now you’re just making up names..

Suddenly, BRIAN LANCE’s music hits! It’s BRIAN LANCE, back out here after making his return earlier in the show!

JONATHYN: YEAH! HIM!! THAT GUY!

BRIAN LANCE: Hey, y’all.. I gotta tell ya. To come back and get a PPV spot just like that, it would be pretty huge, but boss.. Miss RICHIE.. I want to be able to stand tall and proud in that ring when I’m done wiping the floor with this piece of trash, so how about we just make it a nice little “Anything Goes” match? That way, I can humiliate him with PAIN rather than a little pair of panties..

JONATHYN looks at BRIAN LANCE and gets a smile on his face..

JONATHYN: FINE!! I like that idea even more! You two guys, and I’ll get your names later.. You two will face off in an ANYTHING GOES match at AUTUMN IN HELL!! And I can’t wait to see YOU get your ass kicked by.. HIM!!

MYSTIC J: It’s MYST.. Oh never mind.

MYSTIC J and BRIAN LANCE stare each other down, with MYSTIC actually looking a bit relieved that he doesn’t have to endure the humiliation of a bra-and-panties match..

MAIN EVENT
BIGG RIGG & SCOTT YOUNG
vs.
MC TERRIBLE & THE SAVIOR
- - Non-Title Tag Match - -

TERRIBLE and RIGG are the first two in as the referee signals for the bell to start the match. They start off circling one another until finally RIGG leaps for TERRIBLE catching him up by his collar he yanks him forward right into a hard right knee causing TERRIBLE to drop to all fours. From this RIGG immediately drops and elbow to the back of TERRIBLE'S head laying him out flat. He quickly jumps up and drops another and it connects until he goes to do a third is when TERRIBLE finally rolls out of the way. Both men then get back up to their feet as RIGG goes to charge TERRIBLE but he sees it ahead of time and throws him shoulder first into the steel ringpost. From that TERRIBLE immediately walks over and tags in SAVIOR. SAVIOR upon entering into the ring waits until RIGG gets back up and turns around before he bum rushes him and quickly whips him hard into the ringpost diagonally from him. This causes RIGG to smash up against the ringpost stomach first as SAVIOR comes walking over quickly right behind him. SAVIOR grabs RIGG and starts smashing RIGG'S face into the top turnbuckle over and over and over again. After smashing his face 10 times he lets go as RIGG falls flat on his back. SAVIOR jumps over him immediately for the pin cover, 1.....2.... and YOUNG breaks up the count by kicking the back of SAVIOR'S head. The ref right away goes to see YOUNG out as TERRIBLE jumps in really quick to get a few cheap-shot stomps in onto RIGG'S head. TERRIBLE then jumps out of the ring before the ref turns back in time to see TERRIBLE tagging himself back in again as he scrambles over to RIGG right away pick him up slowly by his hair mocking YOUNG as he does. He then whips RIGG across the ring as he himself goes running backwards to bounces off the other side's ropes. Upon both coming back it looks like a car crash as they both connect together in a double clothesline doing a miniature 45 degree turn in the air before crashing down hard onto the mat. The crowd pops a bit much from seeing this as YOUNG sees that RIGG is in trouble reaches in as far as he can tagging himself in by just barely smacking RIGG'S foot. With that, the ref lets YOUNG in finally!

He comes running in and covers TERRIBLE right away, 1.... 2... and a kickout! YOUNG then picks up TERRIBLE and sets him up for a suplex. As he does so he points to SAVIOR saying, "It's over!" as he holds TERRIBLE in a stalling suplex only to drop him hard! He then drags TERRIBLE away from SAVIOR as he slowly starts to pull up TERRIBLE to his feet. He whips him over to the ringpost to then walk over and set him atop of it. YOUNG then sets up TERRIBLE when.... BAM! YOUNG just superplexed TERRIBLE!!! YOUNG however is too feeling a little of the side effects as SAVIOR cannot take this anymore and jumps into the ring while YOUNG slowly gets up a bit woozy when BLAM!!!!!!! SAVIOR just speared the living hell out of YOUNG only to roll right back out before the ref could catch him. SAVIOR then however while the ref was tending to YOUNG grabbed a hold of TERRIBLE and dragged him over closer to their corner. The ref then turns back just then to see SAVIOR tagging himself back in.

SAVIOR comes running in and goes for the cover, 1.... 2.... and RIGG comes in with the save by doing a leg drop onto SAVIOR! RIGG right away picks up SAVIOR and face first does a quick sit-down piledriver to even up the score. The ref then grabs a hold of RIGG and sends him out. With both men down now the 10-count starts, 1.... 2.... 3.... 4.... 5 and SAVIOR is up and to his feet just as YOUNG is about so as well. SAVIOR comes running at YOUNG with a running clothesline but YOUNG ducks and sends SAVIOR over the top rope. YOUNG then jumps and tags RIGG back in. RIGG quickly runs over, climbs up top the top rope, and jumps off as SAVIOR is slowly getting up with a body splash taking the both of them down. RIGG then is the first one who starts to slightly move and stir starting to get up as the ref is to the 5-count already. He then finishes standing up and grabs a hold of SAVIOR dragging him back over to the ring and rolling him in. RIGG makes a cover, 1......2..... and a kickout at the last split second! RIGG then waits for SAVIOR as he comes running towards him with an open clothesline but SAVIOR sees it and ducks it. RIGG then bounces off only to be caught up by SAVIOR on the way back and is belly-to belly suplexed. And with RIGG landing in front of YOUNG, he tags himself in. YOUNG then goes running and drop kicks SAVIOR back out of the ring as TERRIBLE jumps in. The ref tries to stop it all but is losing control now. TERRIBLE ducks a hard right from scoops up YOUNG with one arm. Instead of dropping him down though he runs over and goes to toss him straight out of the ring but instead YOUNG grabs a hold of TERRIBLE'S head and does a very nasty guillotine neck drop as YOUNG crashes down hard on the outside! The crowd pops from the craziness of what just happened!

With both YOUNG and TERRIBLE both down now, SAVIOR rolls back into the ring and runs over grabbing a hold of RIGG. He then suplexes RIGG back into the ring not having any mercy on him. As TERRIBLE gets back to the apron, SAVIOR jumps up and waits as RIGG is getting up wearily when BAM!! RIGG is super kicked!! RIGG goes back and bounces off the ropes! SAVIOR tags TERRIBLE and sets up RIGG for a powerbomb! TERRIBLE with a dropkick! It’s THE REMIX! RIGG is CLOBBERED!! TERRIBLE goes for the pin. 1...2… THREE!

WINNERS: MC TERRIBLE & THE SAVIOR

The match has ended. The successful tag team champions are about to leave. SCOTT YOUNG calls for a mic.

SCOTT YOUNG: SAVIOR! Yeah, I'm talking to you! You seriously think I'm all talk, don't you?

SAVIOR nods in agreement.

SCOTT YOUNG: I'm about to prove you wrong! A couple of weeks ago, I made a threat that you took lightly. A month or so ago, you would have been right. Tonight, you're going to wish you took me seriously. SAVIOR, let me draw your attention to the X-Tron.

Everyone looks up at the X-Tron. An image begins to form on it. The picture focuses and reveals SAVIOR'S wife and daughter gagged and tied to a chair. SCOTT YOUNG is standing in the background with a sinister smile on his face. The crowd gasps in shock. SAVIOR turns around to face SCOTT, who is now standing in the crowd.

SCOTT YOUNG: Now, if you'll excuse me, your family is waiting for me to come home. HA HA HA HA HA!

SCOTT drops the mic and disappears into the crowd.

Fade to black...