KORE starts exchanging punches and jabs with CASH... CASH rolls to outside of the ring, and heads up the ramp! KORE jumps out, grabs a steel chair and goes after him. CASH is left alone right below the X-Tron, where KORE attempts to hit him with the chair but fails. All of a sudden. from behind the curtains, runs CYREN, who chokes CASH from behind. KORE grabs the chair again, and this time hits it against CASH’s brain! KORE then whips CASH back down the ramp toward the ring! KORE looks back at CYREN for a moment, and CYREN gives him a thumbs-up! KORE isn’t sure what to think, but he follows CASH down to the ring, and CYREN gets the chair. CYREN stays there, standing and watching. In the ring, KORE hits a running dropkick, which drives CASH straight to the ringside post. KORE climbs the top rope, and leaps on CASH, who actually counters it and tosses KORE through the announce table!. CYREN then slowly heads down to the ring. KORE is up again, and he hits a Russian Leg Sweep from behind. CASH is dizzy, and KORE seeks below the ring apron for any object. He picks up a sledgehammer. CASH tries to apply a DDT, but KORE catches him with the hammer right in the face! CRUNCH!! BROKEN NOSE!! He grabs his face in agony and rolls inside the ring, KORE rolls in after him and hits the sledgehammer against the stomach of CASH. And as CASH bends over in enormous pain, he hits the butt of the hammer with immense power against the back of the head of CASH, who flops down to the ground.. The referee stops KORE and looks at CASH, who is not looking too good. KORE pushes the ref out of the way and covers CASH! 1.. 2.. THREE! KORE wins the match! KORE looks at the crowd and points to himself in victory, but CYREN gets into the ring and looks at KORE for a moment KORE looks back, ready for a fight. CYREN actually looks IMPRESSED with KORE’s work! He picks CASH up and shakes him awake. CASH looks like he needs some help, but CYREN just looks at him. KORE doesn’t know what’s going on. CYREN picks CASH up over his shoulder and carried him out of the ring. KORE watches carefully, and CYREN turns to KORE and asks him to HELP HIM carry CASH to the back! Huh? KORE looks into CYREN’s white eyes and sees no emotion! He slowly walks over to the two men on the ramp and sees CASH, who is quietly begging for help. CASH is really hurt! He’s actually asking for his enemy to help him! KORE realizes the damage he’s done, stops worrying about a double-cross and hooks CASH’s limp arm around his neck and supports him! CYREN and KORE are working together to help a fallen comrade! The fans are really impressed! UNTIL!! CASH suddenly comes to life and NAILS KORE IN THE GUT! CYREN grabs KORE and hits a ridiculously dangerous DDT on the steel ramp! BANG! KORE is knocked GOOFY! CASH collapses from the beating he had taken earlier ad CYREN whips KORE into the steel steps on the side of the ring, causing the top set of steps to fly off the bottom set! CYREN picks KORE up! NO!! PILEDRIVER!! KORE is IN TROUBLE!! CYREN grabs KORE’s leg and places it on the bottom step! He calls CASH! CASH limps over and grabs the top set of steps! With all the power he has left, he raises the heavy steps over his head!

CASH: THIS IS FOR BREAKING MY NOSE, YOU SON OF A BITCH!

JASON brings the steps down HARD across KORE’s legs! BANG! NO! NO! KORE’s leg could be SHATTERED!! CYREN helps CASH to the back, leaving KORE to writhe in pain as EMT’s head down to help him!

The shot returns to live footage of an enraged KORE headed into the arena. STEVE SAYORS stops him.

SAYORS: KORE! You’ve been named as one of the two special guest referees for tonight’s Universal Title match!

KORE: YEAH. AND JASON CASH WILL NOT WIN.

SAYORS: So are you saying you’re not going to judge this fairly?

KORE: I’m saying that the minute JASON CASH’s shoulders hit the canvas, I will count to three so fast, my hand will be a blur!

SAYORS: But do you think JONATHYN, the other ref, is going to allow that?

KORE: He may not even get the chance..

KORE limps off as the shot cuts to COOPER walking in the door looking a bit tipsy. He heads over to a woman facing away from the camera..

COOPER: Hey, baby! After I win my match tonight, you wanna go grab a drink with the next Universal Champion?

The woman turns around, and it’s...

WANNABEENA: ExCUSE ME?

COOPER: Oh my GOD! Forget it!

WANNABEENA: Well, actually..

COOPER takes off as WANNABE checks himself out in a small mirror from his purse.

STEVE SAYORS catches up with BIGG RIGG and SUPERBALLS as they drive into the arena in a souped-up Jeep Cherokee with the cargo area covered by a canvas tarp. STEVE runs up to the jeep with his microphone.

SAYORS: Guys! You’re both in major matches tonight! SUPERBALLS, you’ll be defending your X-Treme Title against JUSTIN SANE, the guy who just changed his name to JUSTIN SANE, and BIGG RIGG, you’re going after the Heavyweight Title against FUZZ!

RIGG: It’s in the bag, Steve-O. Not even a problem. It’s JASON CASH I want, and this belt will be a great thing for me to hit him over the head with.

SAYORS: So what’s your plan?

RIGG: Well, I think my plan begins with treating FUZZ like the mid-card GARBAGE that he is, by HUMILIATING him in the middle of the ring, and then I’m going to ask for.. no.. DEMAND my rightful spot in the Universal Match!

SUPERBALLS: Yeah! And I’m gonna take his Heavyweight title!

RIGG: What?

SUPERBALLS: Well, I mean I’m gonna beat SOMEBODY for it!

SAYORS: So what’s in the jeep, guys?

RIGG: Relax, Steve. It’s my laundry.

SUPERBALLS: Yeah. Mine too.

Just then, JONATHYN’s limo pulls up, and SAYORS runs over with the microphone. JONATHYN and JASON get out, and JEN JETSON is behind them. STEVE looks excited that he’s getting so much airtime. JONATHYN, JASON and JEN stop as STEVE addresses them.

SAYORS: Mr. BROWN! A quick question! Is your participation in the Universal Match tonight going to be to help JASON or to prevent KORE from hurting him?

JONATHYN: STEVE, I’m glad you asked. My participation has a number of reasons behind it. First off, I’m here to protect my investment here. Mr. Cash is your next Universal Champ, and I just want to make sure that KORE doesn’t do anything he may regret later. I just hope KORE’s LEG isn’t bothering him too much. His emotions may have gotten the better of him. He’s not cleared to compete until next month. HE wanted to be in the big PPV match, FINE! HE wanted to be back in action tomorrow night, FINE! I’ll book him every night if he wants! I just hope he doesn’t hurt himself.. My OTHER REASON for participating is my way of saying GOODBYE to all this on-camera silliness! I don’t need to be in the spotlight so much! I’m the OWNER, I’m not a star! My Guest Refereeing tonight will be my way to say goodbye to the on-camera part of this job. Why don’t you ask JASON and his manager JEN JETSON about how they plan to handle the Universal Championship?

JASON and JEN look at STEVE as he turns to talk to them. Suddenly, JONATHYN decides it’s time to go, and they walk off before the interview can begin. He looks upset, until he spots CENTURION walking in with CATHERINE CLEVELAND!

SAYORS: CATHERINE! CENTURION! You guys.. Or, you guy and you girl.. um.. WOMAN.. Um, you TWO are up for the tag belts tonight against the INVADERS! How do you feel your chances are?

CATHERINE: Do you know how I feel? I feel CHEATED!

SAYORS: Cheated?

CATHERINE: ABSOLUTELY! Does anyone really believe this WANNABEENA is a WOMAN! How can a women’s division be taken seriously when this kind of crap is happening!

SAYORS: So you think YOU should be the women’s champ?

CATHERINE: I don’t care who has the belt, I just want to be sure it’s a WOMAN. I can take on anyone in this fed, and I will. SUPERBALLS knows he’s got an open invitation to get his ass kicked by a woman, and if he and his friend RIGG want to take us on for the tag titles after tonight, I say BRING IT ON, BITCH!

SAYORS: Strong words!

CENTURION: From a STRONG WOMAN, Steve.. I finally have a partner I can really depend on! We’re going all the way, and the tag titles are just the beginning!

After a massive pyro display, ZERO TOLERANCE is officially underway!

ANREW GIBSON
vs. CHRYSTIAN GIBSON
Loser is out of the XWF

ANDREW walks down to the ring to major boos from the fans. He slides into the ring and pulls off his shirt. Shortly after him, CHRYSTIAN comes out to a mild cheer. CHRYSTIAN slides in and immediately gets stomped. ANDREW pulls him to his feet then backs him into the corner. He slings him into the opposite corner and levels him with a clothesline. He mounts him and begins slamming hard fists into his face. He gets off then goes to pull CHRYSTIAN back to his feet, but CHRYSTIAN hits a low blow then heads to the corner and sits against the turnbuckle, not wanting to fight his brother.. ANDREW yells something at CHRYSTIAN, then begins to move forward. CHRYSTIAN gets to his feet like a shot and charges at him. He nails him with a spear! CHRYSTIAN slams ANDREW into the corner, then lifts him on his shoulder, spins around, and hits a spinebuster! CHRYSTIAN hooks the leg. 1.. 2.. NO! ANDREW kicked out! CHRYSTIAN screams at the referee who holds up two fingers. CHRYSTIAN backs him into the corner, as ANDREW stands back up. ANDREW slides out of the ring and grabs the timekeeper's chair. He slides back into the ring, then pulls back to hit CHRYSTIAN. The ref grabs the chair. ANDREW spins around and shoves the chair into the ref’s gut, then slams it over his back. The referee drops like a sack of wet cement as ANDREW turns around to hit CHRYSTIAN, but he can't find him. CHRYSTIAN leaps off of the turnbuckle with a spinning wheel kick. WHACK! ANDREW slams it over his head, but gets kicked for it too! Both men are on the mat while the chair is in the corner. ANDREW pulls himself back up, then yanks CHRYSTIAN back to his feet.. He slaps his foot down on the chair and pulls it over, so its behind CHRYSTIAN. He uses all his strength to slam his opponent down, onto the chair! He rolls CHRYSTIAN over then kicks the chair out of the ring. He yanks the ref over to CHRYSTIAN. He makes a loose cover. 1... 2... THR- NO!! CHRYSTIAN grabs ANDREW’s trunks and pulls him into a small package! 1.. 2.. THREE! DING DING DING!! The young and inexperienced CHRYSTIAN GIBSON just beat the seasoned veteran ANDREW GIBSON!! “THE BLADE” is out of the XWF!!

WINNER

In the back, KRUZZ is pacing back and forth, worried about his upcoming match. He is wearing his special paintball suit, but he is definitely concerned. Newcomer GRAVY walks up to him and just looks at him. KRUZZ senses his presence and turns around.

KRUZZ: Can I help you?

GRAVY: Just thought you could use a hand tonight.

KRUZZ: What?

GRAVY: I know how you can win your match tonight.

KRUZZ: My PAINTBALL match? YOU know how I can win it?

GRAVY: Physics, my friend.

KRUZZ: PHYSICS?

GRAVY: Physics. Why does the paintball burst?

KRUZZ: Because is hits something.

GRAVY: Something.. HARD.

KRUZZ: Huh?

GRAVY: It won’t break if it has nothing to break against.

KRUZZ: What the hell are you talking about?

GRAVY: Come with me, we don’t have a lot of time.

KRUZZ: Don’t you have a match out there in a minute?

GRAVY: Yes, so we don’t have much time. I’d rather see you get the cruiserweight belt.

KRUZZ: WHY? Are you my BROTHER or something?

GRAVY: Don’t ask why, just allow me to help you.

a reluctant KRUZZ follows GRAVY out of the shot.

Elsewhere in the arena. ALI is standing next to STEVE SAYORS.

SAYORS: ALI, you are definitely one of the hot new starts in the XWF, and you’re definitely a favorite in this HART TITLE match!

ALI: Tell me something I don’t know, Steven.

SAYORS: For someone with limited experience in the ring, we’re all very impressed with your skills. How do you feel you’re going to do tonight.

ALI: Well it’s really simple, Steve. Yeah, I’m the new guy, and yes, I don’t have a lot of ring experience. But what I do have is a SECRET WEAPON.

SAYORS: A secret weapon?

ALI: I’m being taught by the best there is in the XWF.

SAYORS: Really? You have someone here teaching you the ropes?

ALI: Only the best Universal Champion the XWF has ever seen?

SAYORS: REALLY? Who is it? RIGG? COOPER? JAYZON WILLIAMZ? MIGRAINE? THE BRAND?

ALI: You aren’t even close. Come on in, boss.

The camera turns tot he doorway, and reveals.. FRENZY! IT’S FRENZY! After a few moments, we notice that he isn’t exactly in tip top shape. He’s got a bit of a gut, and isn’t clean shaven, but it’s definitely the former champ FRENZY. He heads to the mic and snatches is away from SAYORS.

FRENZY: Oh, Steven You haven’t changed a bit.

SAYORS: Well YOU certainly have! Look at you!

ALI: Don’t judge him, STEVE!

FRENZY: No, no. he’s right. I may not be in prime condition, and maybe that’s because I wasn’t offered a contract when the XWF came back. Maybe I’ve been out of action for a few years. Maybe JONATHYN knew he couldn’t use me. So that’s when I went out there and started working with this little firecracker, and let me tell you, after we win that HART belt tonight, the sky is the limit for ALI and FRENZY! I’M BACK, BABY! And with ALI at my side, I’m gonna make some SERIOUS NOISE!

TWISTER
vs. E-DOGG
vs. CONFUSION
vs. JEN JETSON
vs. ARROE
vs. GRAVY
vs. ALI
Laser Pointer Elimination Match

The match started with each start being handed a laser pointer on the stage by SENIOR OFFICIAL REES. They look at them and test them out. The lasers seem relatively harmless, but nobody dares try them on their eyes. ALI talks to his manager FRENZY, but REES tells him he has to go to the back, as the match is too dangerous to stay at ringside. FRENZY looks angry, but he agrees to the ruling and heads to the back. The competitors head down to the ring individually, CONFUSION comes down, and ARROE is already there with a chair ready to strike. CONFUSION sees him and looks at him for a moment. The two men stare each other down. ARROE just watches him with a twisted look in his eye. JEN JETSON comes running down! ARROE darts across the ring to catch her with the chair, but JEN JETSON takes him down with a great floor move! She SLAMS his head on the ring post, then uses his chair against him, bashing his head on the turnbuckle three times!! ARROE is OUT COLD! Where the hell is GRAVY? JEN JETSON heads over to the ropes and gets her laser pointer out of her waistband! TWISTER gets into the ring and JEN immediately dives on him and blasts him in the eyes!! The CHAMP is about to be thrown out! TWISTER tries to get out of the hold, but ALI is there, and he pins his arms down so JEN can blind him! TWSTER gives up and rolls out of the ring! CONFUSION and E-DOGG lock up in the center of the ring, and JEN JETSON aims her pointer at ARROE! She aims the pointer in his eyes! ARROE is being lasered in the eyes! He scrambles out of the ring and is immediately disqualified!! ALI looks around for a moment, and he just starts attacking everyone he sees! He doesn’t care who they are, he just wants to WIN! He’s aching to get a victory here tonight! E-DOGG and JEN JETSON continue to battle as ALI tries to break it up and attack E-DOGG. CONFUSION is reaching for his pointer! The inside of the ring has only a handful of competitors in it! E-DOGG, JETSON, ALI and CONFUSION! ALI grabs CONFUSION before he can get his pointer aimed, and tries to blind him with his own pointer, but JEN JETSON jumps in and stops him! Then ARROE and E-DOGG join the fight! Finally, GRAVY makes his way down to the ring! CONFUSION catches E-DOGG with a lucky forearm and pushes the exhausted star to the ground! GRAVY immediately dives on him and hits him with the laser! E-DOGG can’t see! HE rolls out of the ring! JEN JETSON grabs CONFUSION, but ALI catches her in a SLEEPER HOLD!! JEN JETSON kicks ALI in the crotch and breaks the hold!! Now it’s JEN JETSON, CONFUSION, GRAVY and ALI in the ring! CONFUSION and ALI attack JEN JETSON, but JEN JETSON drops to the ground fast and trips both men into the ropes! GRAVY shoots his laser into JEN’S EYES! JEN ducks down and spears GRAVY! It’s still four competitors, but.. WHAT THE HELL IS HAPPENING NOW? A JEEP pulls into the arena and drives DOWN THE RAMP!! It’s BIGG RIGG and SUPERBALLS! RIGG is in driver’s seat and SUPERBALLS is in the back! He pulls the tarp off the cargo in the back, and it’s a GIANT GUN! CONFUSION drops to his stomach and stays low, and SUPERBALLS hits the ring with a WASH of LASER LIGHT! JEN, GRAVY and ALI are all blinded by the sudden shot of light! They dive out of the ring and the light turns off!! CONFUSION gets to his feet, as SUPERBALLS and RIGG get out of the jeep and join the NEW CHAMP in the ring! Is CONFUSION part of the FLATLINE CREW? Suddenly, FRENZY comes running down to ringside, completely infuriated! SUPERBALLS comes out of the ring and FRENZY hits him with a DROP KICK! But FRENZY is totally out of shape, and he just bounces off the giant SUPERBALLS and flops to the ground! SUPERBALLS picks him up for a powerbomb, but ALI comes across the steps and launches in the air with a flying dropkick of his own! SUPERBALLS stumbles back and topples over the barricade into the crowd! ALI and FRENZY scamper up the ramp as CONFUSION holds his belt high in the air!

NEW HART CHAMPION

The shot cuts to COOPER and JAYDE in the back talking to JONATHYN.

COOPER: So where do we stand, boss? I mean, you helped me out and all, and I told you I’d be good.. and..

JONATHYN: Real simple, COOP. I’ve given you a second chance here, and if you cross me, I will kick your ass out of here so fast it will make your head spin. You’ve got a match against EPIC tonight, and you have to play it safe and follow the rules. I’m putting REES out there to make sure you don’t break a single rule. JAYDE, you’re his manager now, right?

JAYDE: I guess..

JONATHYN: Well then it’s up to you to keep him in line! It’s your ass on the line too!

COOPER: Huh?

JAYDE: I just joined two days ago!

JONATHYN: You heard me. If wither one of you breaks a single rule tonight, you’ll both be suspended indefinitely! Now if you’ll excuse me, I have to get ready for the Main Event. Remember those, COOP? MAIN EVENTS?

JOANTHYN storms off, wondering why he is so concerned with COOPER with all this other stuff on his mind. COOPER just looks at JAYDE and tells her to relax.

SELENA ANGEL
vs. "WANNABEENA"
Bra & Panties Match

The arena is filled with the opening notes of “Man, I Feel Like A Woman” by Shania Twain, and WANNABEENA comes down in lovely sequined outfit, and he’s starting to look like he’s ENJOYING his new role as a woman! He gets into the ring and struts around, now more accustomed to his female shoes. SELENA heads down, looking angry and determined. The bell rings. The two “women” circle each other, and WANNABEENA suddenly stops, and starts to taunt SELENA, motioning her to "bring it". SELENA grins and charges at WANNABEENA , but WANNABEENA drops down and pulls the top rope down as she hits, causing SELENA to flip over and crash down to the floor outside of the ring. WANNABEENA slides under the bottom rope and comes face to face with a hard right hand from SELENA. WANNABEENA staggers and SELENA slams her head into the edge of the ring. SELENA picks up WANNABEENA and drives his head into the steel post. SELENA picks up WANNABEENA, but WANNABEENA drops to his knees and delivers a low blow to SELENA, which obviously has no effect. The ref yells at WANNABEENA and warns him not to do it again. WANNABEENA picks up SELENA and slides her into the ring. WANNABEENA picks up SELENA and throws her into the corner. WANNABEENA lands a few chops into SELENA's chest while receiving loud cheers from the audience. WANNABEENA sits SELENA up on the top turnbuckle, and then climbs up himself. WANNABEENA calls for a Frankensteiner, but SELENA pushes him off the turnbuckle, and jumps off with a Diving Moonsault. WANNABEENA moves at the last second, causing SELENA to land hard on her stomach. WANNABEENA steps over the fallen challenger and turns her around. WANNABEENA humiliates SELENA by slapping her across the face a few times, then grabs her skirt! SELENA kicks WANNABEENA in the face! SELENA comes up from behind the staggering WANNABEENA and nails him with an impressive Pump Handle Buster. She dives on him to undress him, but WANNABEENA just tosses her aside! SELENA doesn't change the expression on her face as she gets up and picks up WANNABEENA by the hair, but she just pulls off his wig! SELENA whips WANNABEENA into the ropes and levels him with a stiff clothesline on the way back. SELENA takes advantage of WANNABEENA 's idle position and locks in the Cobra Clutch. WANNABEENA screams in pain as the ref watches on. SELENA tightens her grip and WANNABEENA all of a sudden goes limp. The ref notices this and begins the three count. The ref lifts WANNABEENA 's arm, and it drops, The ref shouts ONE! The ref lifts WANNABEENA 's arm again, and it drops, TWO! The ref lifts WANNABEENA 's arm one more time, but it stops in mid-air, reaches back, and pokes SELENA right in the eye! SELENA releases the hold and falls back, holding her eye. WANNABEENA gets up and staggers around for a few seconds, trying to regain his composure. WANNABEENA picks up SELENA and stomps on her foot as hard as he can! SELENA screams in pain, and WANNABEENA starts to laugh hysterically. WANNABEENA throws SELENA into the ropes, and hits a Samoan Drop on her, on the way back. WANNABEENA points to the top rope, as he gets even more cheers from the fans. The fully drag-wearing WANNABEENA goes up top, and stumbles while up there, when suddenly CATHERINE CLEVELAND runs out from the back! She shoves WANNABEENA off the top rope into the barricade, and WANNABEENA hits it hard! WANNABEENA slowly gets up, when we see a man in the first row start to choke him! The camera changes angles, and we see it’s CENTURION! CENTURION tightens the hold on WANNABEENA! But here comes BIGG RIGG! RIGG runs behind him and hits him with a baseball bat! BIGG RIGG drags CENTURION through the crowd to the back as Catherine picks up WANNABEENA and tosses "her" back into the ring. SELENA gets up and starts working over the dazed WANNABEENA, but she just doesn’t have the energy left! WANNABEENA scoops her up and drops her flat on her back! WANNABEENA goes up the top rope as SELENA is just getting up, and he jumps off and nails SELENA with a Missile Dropkick! SELENA IS OUT COLD! WANNABEENA gets up and picks up SELENA! She’s out on her feet! WANNABE grabs both shoulders of her outfit and.. RRRIP! SELENA is STRIPPED! THE MATCH IS OVER!! WANNABE is the new WOMEN’S CHAMPION! CATHERINGE CLEVELAND rushes to the underwear-only SELENA’s side and covers her up with a towel from ringside, helping her out of the ring and up the ramp.. But what happened with CENTURION and RIGG?

NEW WOMEN’S CHAMPION

WANNABEENA gets to his feet and holds the new pink WOMEN’S BELT over his head to a surprisingly large ovation! He defeated SELENA ANGEL and didn’t shed a thread of clothing!

In the back, we see BIGG RIGG and his henchman Tony stomping on the now bloodied CENTURION. BIGG RIGG picks up CENTURION and tosses him into a door. The door shatters, and we can now see SELENA ANGEL wrapped in a towel screaming. She tosses shoes at BIGG RIGG as he laughs. BIGG RIGG gives the "Screw You" sign in Italian to CENTURION and we see a badly beaten CENTURION glaring at BIGG RIGG as he walks away..

The shot heads to the back, as ZUELSDORF and EXTREME WARRIOR are putting on their special PAINTBALL suits. The body suits are red, with a white circle in the center. SENIOR OFFICIAL REES goes over the instructions.

REES: Okay, men. Here’s how it works. You se the white circles on your suits? Well that circle

EXTREME WARRIOR: Hey! Where the hell is KRUZZ?

REES: He already got his suit earlier. Any way, the rules are simple. Once you get hit in the white circle, you are OUT OF THE MATCH. Got it?

ZUELSDORF: This should be fun!

The two men continue to suit up as the shot heads back to ringside.

SUPERBALLS
vs. JUSTIN SANE
X-Treme Rules

SUPERBALLS, still feeling very cocky and happy about the earlier HART match, struts out to the stage to a big pop.. He slowly turns, grinning ear to ear, and begins to trot down the ramp towards the ring. Suddenly, JUSTIN SANE runs out from behind the curtain, wielding a snow shovel, and runs up behind SUPERBALLS and smacks him in the head!!! JUSTIN smacks the head of SUPERBALLS a few more times with the shovel, drags him down to the ring and rolls him in. JUSTIN quickly follows. The snow shovel comes down once again with a sickening thud, but before JUSTIN can hit him again, SUPERBALLS catches him with a big boot from a lying position and the shovel goes flying! JUSTIN looks like he is tempted to gain possession of the shovel back, but he instead just attacks SUPERBALLS once again with an elbow drop to the back of the head. JUSTIN squats down, grabs SUPERBALLS by the torso, and flips him over in a Gutwrench Powerbomb! JUSTIN looks down at the worked-over body of SUPERBALLS, and then he walks over to the turnbuckle. JUSTIN is dominating this match early on! He quickly starts untying the second turnbuckle padding from the corner. JUSTIN has a little trouble with it, and starts biting his lower lip and sweating. He starts to rock his head back and forth and grunt...but the in finally comes off. JUSTIN SANE tosses the pad into the audience. JUSTIN SANE then walks over to SUPERBALLS once again, and slowly picks him up to his feet. JUSTIN SANE head butts him for good measure, and the rockets him into the exposed turnbuckle. SUPERBALLS arches his back up in pain! JUSTIN SANE then takes off like a cat, and rushes towards SUPERBALLS. He lands a huge spear, but instead of releasing it, he grabs the second rope and thrusts his shoulders into the turnbuckle, grinding SUPERBALLS' spine into the metal! JUSTIN loosens his grip on the ropes, and SUPERBALLS kicks him back to the mat and picks JUSTIN up by the neck. SUPERBALLS Irish whips him into the turnbuckle with the exposed metal, and JUSTIN SANE yelps in pain. The big man grabs his back in pain and steps out a few feet, staggering. HE pulls something out of his pocket. It’s a FLASK! SUPERBALLS is stopping for a DRINK? He then pulls out a lighter! He’s going to have a drink and a smoke in the middle of the match? SUPERBALLS walks up to JUSTIN and grabs him by the head. Then, all of a sudden, He lights the lighter and SUPERBALLS spits FIRE into the face of JUSTIN SANE!! JUSTIN frantically grabs his face, trying to put out the fire. He hobbles around panicked, and in between screams, he is kicked in the gut! SUPERBALLS grabs him by the neck, lifts him up, and lands a HUGE JACKNIFE POWEBOMB! JUSTIN is out cold, and SUPERBALLS falls on top of him! 1... 2.. THREE! Another huge win for SUPERBALLS, as he retains the title!

STILL X-TREME CHAMPION

SUPERBALLS holds the title high in the air, and doesn’t see CATHERINE CLEVELAND heading down to the ring! What’s in her hand? It’s the a PAINTBALL GUN for the upcoming match! What is she doing? SUPERBALLS is posing with his belt on the top rope, and CATHERINE has all the time in the world to get into the ring and aim the weapon! SUPERBALLS hops down and turns around, and POP POP POP POP POP POP POP POP!!! SEVEN DIRECT HITS TO SUPERBALLS’ GROIN!! OH NO!! SUPERBALLS COLLAPSES IN PAIN!! THE YELLOW PAINT dripping down his leg starts to turn ORANGE!! It’s mixing with BLOOD from inside SUPERBALLS trunks! OH MY GOD!! CATHERINE heads over and HOOKS HIS LEG!! The ref counts!! 1.. 2.. THREE!!! CATHERINE CLEVELAND HAS STOLEN THE TITLE!! NO!! SUPERBALLS NEEDS MEDICAL ATTENTION!! OH NO!! THIS HURTS MY NUTS JUST TALKING ABOUT IT!!

NEW X-TREME CHAMPION

The shot cuts to ZUELSDORF in the back with the recently returning TYKE MISON getting ready for his Cruiserweight title match. ZUELSDORF is lightly jumping rope, building up a sweat while TYKE MISON gives him words of encouragement...

TYKE MISON: And then.. after the match, we can go out and get the triple chili dog deal at Barry's Den!!

ZUELSDORF: Thanks Tyke.

ZUELSDORF drops the rope and begins throwing fists into the air, pretending to be a heavyweight boxer..

TYKE MISON: Ooohh.. oooh... I'm good at this.

TYKE MISON throws up his fists and begins to playfully box with ZUELSDORF. TYKE MISON throws a play punch and ZUELSDORF ducks beneath it and lands one of his own on Tyke...

TYKE MISON: Oh.. let's play a game... who am I??

TYKE MISON grabs ZUELSDORF and bites his ear. Then both wrestlers stand back and begin thinking...

ZUELSDORF: Umm... wasn't that guy bald? And have weird teeth??

TYKE MISON: Yeah.. but I can't think of his name...

ZUELSDORF: Oh well.. I have to get ready for my match.

ZUELS begins bouncing back and forth again, raising his heart rate.. when there is a knock on the door. TYKE MISON goes and answers it. SENIOR OFFICIAL REES is standing there with a clipboard in his hand.

REES: Umm... ZUELS, there is someone here to see you...

TYKE MISON: Alright.. Let him in.

Then, REES disappears and a figure appears. The man is wearing a pair of sunglasses with the fake mustache on them. The crowd gasps.. The fans recognize him instantly! IT'S JANDROMYTE!! JANDROMYTE IS BACK!! But TYKE and ZUELS don’t know who it is! TYKE MISON and ZUELSDORF sit and stare at the guy... They can't figure out who it is.

TYKE MISON: Hello, do we know you?

JANDRO rolls his eyes and nods his head.. ZUELSDORF and TYKE MISON look on in bewilderment.

ZUELSDORF: I don't think we know you. Have we met you before?

JANDRO nods again, then speaks.

JANDRO: I was a famous icon here awhile back.. I like singing, dancing... and many people think I have a cute butt..

ZUELSDORF: Hmmm..

TYKE MISON: Kelly Clarkson?

JANDRO throws his arms up in the air... and rips off the sunglasses disguise. ZUELSDORF and TYKE MISON scream and make a mad dash for JANDRO and tackle him to the ground.

TYKE MISON: JAN.....

ZUELSDORF: DRO!!!!!!!!

REES comes back and sees what’s going on.

REES: Um.. ZUELSDORF, your match is up, and I don’t want to ruin the family reunion here, but I can’t let your little Clown friends get involved in this one. I’ll say it right now, if I see YKE MISON or JANDROMYTE out there in this match, you will be immediately disqualified. Got it?

JANDRO: He’s got it, PIG! Don’t worry, ZUELS, It’s all you, Monkey. Go get 'em kid...

JANDRO nods tot the two men, and they nod back. He walks off in his paintball suit.

EXTREME WARRIOR
vs. ZUELSDORF
vs. KRUZZ
Paintball Match

The lights go black, and the X-Tron lights up with a shot of the PARKING LOT!

The shot shows ZUELSDORF, who is quickly scanning the entire parking lot in his paintball jumpsuit. He doesn’t see KRUZZ anywhere, and there doesn’t seem to be any action, but he is extremely cautious nonetheless. EXTREME WARRIROR is shown on the other side of the parking lot, also checking out the area and stalking his victims.. Suddenly, SHOTS FIRED!! ZUELSDORF ducks for cover as three giant WHITE SPLOSHES hit a car as he dies behind it! EXTREME WARRIOR was ON HIM! He ran in, but ZUELSDORF bounced up and fired back from behind the car! POP POP POP POP POP!! EXTREME WARRIOR dove behind a car as the paintballs whizzed past. They were a few cars away from each other with two empty spaces between the cars. Suddenly, POP POP POP!! But It wasn’t either one of them!! ZUELSDORF fell to the ground!! WHAT HAPPENED? He quickly got up and felt the back of his head! He was shot! He looked at the ground and saw that the paintballs didn’t break on impact, and he picked one up. It wasn’t a paintball! It was a MARBLE! ZUELSDORF looked behind him and saw nothing. POP POP POP POP POP!!! ZUELSDORF dove out of the way as five more shots hit the car and dented the door! He saw that they were coming from the roof of the arena! He looked up.. It was KRUZZ and his buddy BOB LONG!! They had a sniper position on the roof, and were trying to take out from above! ZUELSDORF was in trouble!! He sprinted between two cars for better coverage, but EXTREME WARRIOR was RIGHT ON THE OTHER SIDE OF THE CAR HE WAS BEHIND!! EXTREME WARRIOR took a shot UNDER THE CAR and it HIT ZUELSDORF!! SPLAT! ZUELSDORF ran like crazy, favoring his left foot, and jumped into the back of a pick-up truck next to an open space! He looked at his leg where EXTREME WARRIOR had gotten him, and he picked up his pant leg and saw a huge bruise forming. He was still in, but this was going to be a painful match, and not nearly as fun as he had expected.. KRUZZ got the gun from BOB and took some shots from the roof!! POP POP POP POP POP. ZULESDORF dove to the far end of the trunk and landed hard on his shoulder. The camera turned to face EXTREME WARRIOR, and the viewers watched as ZUELS came up behind EXTREME WARRIOR with a paint gun of his own! POINT BLANK RANGE!! BOOM BOOM BOOM!! Right in the side of EXTREME WARRIOR’s unprotected head!! EXTREME WARRIOR grabbed his painted head as he fell to the ground! All the camera could see at that point was the top of ZUELS as he beat up on EXTREME WARRIOR!! EXTREME WARRIOR pushed ZUELS off and slowly got behind the car across from ZUELSDORF, separated by one empty space. He aimed carefully and FIRED!! POP POP!! ZUELSDORF dropped to the floor of the truck and quickly repositioned himself to return fire. Suddenly, a yellow Volkswagen came rolling up at top speed and screeched to a halt in the empty space that separated them! ZUELSDORF had already begun to fire!! POP SPLAT POP SPLAT POP SPLAT!! ZUELSDORF saw the car and got angry that he just wasted three shots. Then, from out of the car, SPOOK appeared! It’s SPOOK! He looked VERY ANGRY as he walked around slowly and checked out the damage. He headed over to ZUELSDORF and yelled at him, but he took a paintball shot to the back from EXTREME WARRIOR! ZUELSDORF wasn’t sure what to do next, so he jumped from the back of the truck and ran behind another vehicle as EXTREME WARRIOR gave chase. Suddenly, from the door of the arena, KRUZZ came flying out with BOB LONG’s high-power assault rifle! LOOK AT HIS SUIT! It’s INFLATED! He looks like the Michelin Man! He sees EXTREME WARRIOR closing in on ZUELSDORF, so he fired!! POP POP POP POP POP POP POP POP!! SPOOK dove behind his car as EXTREME WARRIOR takes several paintball hits to the head and falls over!! ZUELSDORF runs at him, but then turns to see KRUZZ, and the two of them start firing wildly at KRUZZ! POP POP POP POP POP POP POP POP POP!! KRUZZ is hit several times, but the paintballs BOUNCE OFF his inflated suit! The paintballs aren’t breaking, and his white spot is till clean!!! EXTREME WARRIOR leaps onto the roof of a car and fires!! POP POP POP!! ZUELSDORF ducks for cover as KRUZZ runs the other way!! EXTREME WARRIOR gets up and runs at ZUELSDORF. He grabs him and picks him up in the air!! DDT ON THE CONCRETE!!!! KRUZZ heads over as EXTREME WARRIOR picks up the lifeless ZUELSDORF. He holds him up and KRUZZ aims his weapon. Suddenly, SPOOK appears again and punks WARRIOR right in the head with a tire iron!! ZUELS jumps up and over, behind EXTREME WARRIOR and puts his gun right against the dazed EXTREME WARRIOR’s head!! If he fires, EXTREME WARRIOR could be serious injured, even killed!! ZUELSDORF DOESN’T CARE!! ANYTHING TO KEEP HIM FROM WINNING!! HE FIRES!! Fizzzzzzzzz. HE’S OUT OF AMMO!!! EXTREME WARRIOR boots ZUELS in the gut, kicks SPOOK in the mouth, and then hits KRUZZ in the jaw with the butt of his gun, then POPS HIS SUIT! He aims and FIRES!!! POP POP POP POP POP POP POP POP POP POP POP!!! RIGHT IN THE MIDDLE OF HIS SUIT, ALMOST COMPLETELY COVERING HIS WHITE SPOT!! KRUZZ is OUT! EXTREME WARRIOR picks ZULESDORF straight up in the air and throws his body at SPOOK! EXTREME WARRIOR aims down and fires his final shot. POP! Right in ZUELSDORF’s chest!

STILL CRUISERWEIGHT CHAMPION

In the back, the camera is roaming the halls, and we see the INVADERS arguing over something. They look very irate as they head to the ring.

THE INVADERS
vs. CENTURION & CATHERINE CLEVELAND
Standard Tag Match

CENTURION appears on stage to a chorus of cheers... then out steps the New X-Treme Champion.. CATHERINE CLEVELAND! The team walks down to the ring and slides in. CENTURION grabs a microphone and raises it to speak, but before he can, THE INVADERS steps out to the stage. SAM stays behind BOB as they walk down to the ring. The audience sees the tension between the masked men. They slide into the ring and CENTURION and CATHERINE CLEVELAND begin stomping them immediately. CENTURION begins exchanging punches with SAM, while CATHERINE CLEVELAND and BOB tie up. BOB leaps forward and hits a bulldog on CLEVELAND. CENTURION is forced into his corner by the ref as SAM walks over to his. BOB whips CATHERINE CLEVELAND into the ropes then hits her with a shoulder block. He whips her into the ropes again then hits a powerslam. He grabs CATHERINE CLEVELAND by the hair and drags her to his corner. He tags SAM in, who sets her up in the corner and begins chopping her across the stomach. BOB holds her, and the ref begins to yell at them. BOB holds his arms up like he didn't do anything, and SAM hip tosses CATHERINE into the center of the ring. SAM slaps her butt then drops down on top of her. He whips her into the ropes and tries to hit a clothesline but she ducks and springs off the opposite ropes. She nails SAM with a forearm smash. Both competitors lie there as CENTURION begins clapping. The audience gets behind him and CATHERINE starts crawling to his corner. SAM grabs her leg and pulls her back into the center of the ring. CATHERINE hops onto one leg then with everything she has left, he hits an enziguri on SAM! The audience goes nuts as CATHERINE leaps forward and tags CENTURION in. BOB jumps into the ring and is met with a clothesline. SAM stands up and gets the same. CENTURION feels the adrenaline and yells at them to get back up. BOB gets up and ducks a clothesline. He lifts CENTURION on his shoulder then drops him with a guillotine on the top rope. SAM drops onto CENTURION 's chest, and hooks the leg for the pin. 1... 2... NO! CENTURION kicks out, and SAM picks him up. He tags BOB in who immediately starts hitting him with quick jabs. He kicks him in the gut then lifts his leg as high as he can and slams CENTURION down to the canvas with an axe kick! He screams out then gets ready to finish CENTURION with the a piledriver.. BAM! CENTURION is DONE! BOB hooks the leg, but SAM comes in and pulls him off! WHAT’S GOING ON? THE INVADERS ARE TURNING ON EACH OTHER! BOB gets up and SAM pushes him! BOB PUSHES BACK! CATHERINE sees the opportunity and she jumps into the ring and tosses SAM out of the ring, then bounces off the rope and pushes BOB over CENTURION, sending BOB crashing to the canvas, and allowing CENTURION to roll him up! 1.. 2.. THREE!! IT’S OVER! NEW CHAMPS!

NEW TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS

CENTURION and CLEVELAND grab the belts and head up the ramp, and SAM gets back into the ring! He grabs a microphone!

INVADER SAM: I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU LET US LOSE!

INVADER BOB: I LET US LOSE? I HAD THE PIN, BUT YOU WOULDN’T LET ME HAVE THE VICTORY, WOULD YOU?

INVADER SAM: BECAUSE I’M SICK OF YOU! YOU’RE STUPID! THIS WHOLE GIMMICK IS STUPID! I DON’T KNOW WHY I EVER LET YOU TALK ME INTO THIS IN THE FIRST PLACE! I SHOULD HAVE LISTENED TO JONATHYN!

INVADER BOB: JONATHYN IS AN IDIOT! THAT’S WHAT YOU TOLD ME!

NVADER SAM: I WAS DRUNK! I’M DONE WITH IT!

INVADER BOB: I’M DONE WITH YOU!

BOB takes a swing at SAM and SAM pulls back, leaving BOB swinging all the way around. SAM comes up behind him and grabs him in a headlock! He grabs BOB’s mask! He’s tugging on the mask, but BOB is struggling! BOB then grabs SAM’s mask! The two men are fighting over each other’s masks! All at once, they pull away from each other, and the MASKS ARE OFF!! The crowd goes nuts as they see MICHAEL EXTREMER and FRAN DAMAGE standing in the ring!! The two men look at the crowd and see that they are unmasked! The fans look thrilled to see them back, but they just attack each other again!

The shot cuts to the back, where JASON CASH is walking through the back on his way to the dressing room when suddenly he is slammed into the wall by a charging figure! The camera shakes and follows the man, It’s GOLDEN BOY! JASON crumples to the floor and a psychotic GOLDEN BOY stands over him.

GOLDEN BOY: What was it you called me Cash?!? A 'sissy'? How do you like this sissy now? Huh bitch?! You think YOU deserve a shot at the Universal Title? You're nothing but a piece of SCROTUM FUNGUS! You don't deserve s**t! You talk about my injury? Whose fault is it that I got injured? YOURS! Me, you, Gibson...The Millionaire's Club. You forgot all about that while I was out there wrestling injured?!?!? You just stood in the back sucking ass like usual. Well consider this a GOLDEN payback...bitch!

GOLDEN BOY goes to walk away but turns back to the woozy CASH. leaning over him.

GOLDEN BOY: Oh and by the way, good luck in your match! Ha ha ha ha ha!"

GOLDEN BOY walks off laughing. He's back!

COOPER
vs. EPIC
Humiliation Match: Standard Rules only apply to COOPER

"Break Stuff" by Limp Bizkit plays, and here comes COOPER to a chorus of BOOS! EPIC walks out from behind the curtain, looking determined. He methodically makes his way down the ramp, and enters the ring slowly, and he stands in the center of the ring, staring down his seemingly underdog opponent. COOPER and EPIC stand nose to nose for several seconds, and EPIC raises his fist to throw a punch. COOPER blocks it, and then unleashes a barrage of his own! He backs EPIC up to the ropes, and COOPER lays waste to the wrestling veteran with a series of punches and caps it all off with a headbutt. EPIC then slides between the top and middle ropes, and tries to free himself from the wrath of COOPER, but the mad bastard is relentless. He yanks EPIC back into the ring by his foot and grabs him around his arms and lands a spinning Belly to Belly Suplex. EPIC lands hard but gets back up quickly. COOPER then backs the dazed contender into the turnbuckle and whips him into the opposite corner. WHAM! EPIC lands hard into the corner and looks to be out on his feet. COOPER rushes in and lands a big body avalanche that sends EPIC stumbling out of the corner. COOPER then grabs the former champion and hurls him into the original turnbuckle with all of his might! EPIC lands hard and looks completely out of it!. He begins stumbling out of the corner dazed, and COOPER is there to bring him down and lock in a textbook Figure Four Leg Lock!! COOPER locks in the submission hold tightly, and EPIC screams in agony! EPIC scoots to the ropes, and grabs hold. COOPER does not release the hold until REES hits the disqualification count of four and a half. EPIC grabs his knee in agony, and COOPER plants a forearm into the small of his back. EPIC takes a few steps towards the turnbuckle and COOPER grabs EPIC in a waist lock and lands a painful Pendulum Back Breaker. EPIC writhes in pain on the canvas, and COOPER makes a cover, hooking the leg.....1......2....NO!!! COOPER moves EPIC into a sitting position, and quickly backs himself into the ropes and rockets back with a well placed boot to the temple! EPIC is laid out! COOPER makes another pin attempt......1......2......NO!!! EPIC has had no time to offer a defensive! COOPER gives the crowd the finger as EPIC struggles to get off of the canvas. EPIC stands up to face the champ, but COOPER is quick to kick him in the gut, and lands the COOPERBLASTER It's got to be over!! 1.. 2.. NO!!! EPIC kicks out!!! the whole crowd murmurs in concern, but COOPER doesn't look phased. He starts gingerly climbing the turnbuckle to the top rope! COOPER waits for EPIC to stand to come off with some impressive and legal maneuver. EPIC finally gets to his feet, and spins around to see COOPER coming off the top rope... FLYING DROPKICK! EPIC is OUT COLD! 1.. 2.. THREE!! It’s all over! But wait! The lights go out! The arena is PITCH BLACK! What’s going on? When the lights come back on, we see COOPER in the middle of the ring, face down, and stripped down COMPLETELY NAKED! After A few moments, he gets up and realizes he’s been stripped bare! He gets to his feet, blushing and covering his private parts! The crowd laughs hysterically as COOPER runs to the back. IT MUST HAVE BEEN “THIEF” AT IT AGAIN!! COOPER has been utterly HUMILIATED by THIEF!

WINNER

We cut to the back, where WANNABE, now sweaty and gross, with his make-up running and his wig gone, looks more like a Jerry Springer reject than a wrestling title holder. A stern and unfamiliar voice shoots across the hall and causes WANNABE’s eyes to open wide in surprise.

GET ON YOUR FEET, MAGGOT. YOU ABSOLUTELY MAKE ME SICK!

WANNABE: Excuse me?

YOU HEARD ME, SOLDIER! ON YOUR FEET!

WANNABE slowly gets to his feet and looks at the man who’s suddenly shouting military commands at him.

WANNABE: Do I KNOW you?

YES YOU DO. YOU KNOW ME WELL. BUT THE MAN YOU KNOW IS A FAT, UNDUSCIPLINED, OUT OF SHAPE SLOB, WHO COULD ONLY WIN MATCHES BY BEATING UP ON WEAK DEFENSELESS WOMEN! I AM NOT THAT MAN. I AM A NEW MAN NOW, A MAN WHO WILL SHOW YOU THE WAY TO BECOME A MAN.

WANNABE: That doesn’t help.

HERE IS A PHOTO OF ME, TAKEN ONLY A FEW SHORT YEARS AGO.

The man’s hand shoots out ant a 45 degree angle from his body, and WANNABE takes the photo.

WANNABE: Oh my god... It can’t be.

LOOK IN MY EYES< SOLDIER, THERE IS NO MISTAKING THE MAN I USED TO BE.

WANNABE: I can’t believe it! DOCTOR EXTREME!! It’s been YEARS!!

YOU ARE CORRECT. I WAS KNOWN AS DOCTOR EXTREME, BUT FROM THIS MOMENT ON YOU WILL ADDRESS ME AS SERGEANT!

WANNABE: Sergeant Extreme?

SERGEANT EXTREME: THAT IS ABSOLUTELY CORRECT! NOW, I SAW YOUR PERFORMANCE THESE PAST FEW WEEKS AND I MUST ADMIT I AM COMPLETELY APPALLED BY YOU. YOU HAVE DONE NOTHING BUT DESECRATE THE NAME OF THIS FINE FEDERATION. YOU SHOULD CRAWL INTO A HOLE AND DIE, SOLDIER! YOU ARE A DISGRACE TO THE X-TREME WRESTLING FEDERATION!

WANNABE: But I won the belt!

SERGEANT EXTREME: WHAT YOU WON IS A TITLE MADE FOR WEAK AND DEFENSLESS WOMEN! THE BELT YOU HOLD IN YOUR HANDS IS PINK! YOU ARE WEARING WOMEN’S CLOTHING AND MAKE-UP! IS THIS THE KIND OF CHAMPION YOU WISH TO BE?

WANNABE: Well.. I guess not, but..

SERGEANT EXTREME: I WILL NOT ACCEPT “BUT” FROM YOU, SOLDIER. MY TIME IN THE MILITARY HAS TAUGHT ME MANY THINGS, BUT THE THING IT HAS TAUGHT ME THAT I CONSIDER GREATEST OF ALL, IS THAT I AM A WINNER, AND I CAN BEAT ANY MAN! YOU CAN HAVE THIS FEELING AS WELL, BUT YOU MUST GET RID OF THESE RIDICI\ULOUS OBSTACLES. LOOK AT YOURSELF!

WANNABE: Yeah, about that.. Look, I’m just here to have fun, and I don’t really think I’m ready for a major title right n..

SERGEANT EXTREME: THAT TALK WILL END NOW, SOLDIER! YOU ARE A CHAMPION. YOU HAVE BEEN A CHAMPION IN THE PAST AND YOU WILL BE, I REPEAT, YOU WILL BE AGAIN! DO YOU WANT TO BE THE MAN WHO GAVE UP AND ONLY WANTED TO BE A WINNER, OR DO YOU HAVE WHAT IT TAKES TO BE A WINNER?

WANNABE: I CAN be a winner!

SERGEANT EXTREME: THAT’S RIGHT, AND THE FIRST STEP IS TO STOP GIVING YOURSELF WALLS.

WANNABE: Walls?

SERGEANT EXTREME: WALLS. THE FIRST WALL IS YOUR NAME. FROM THIS DAY FORWARD, YOU WILL NOT REFER TO YOURSELF AS “WANNABE”, AS THAT IS THE BIGGEST WALL OF ALL. YOU ARE JOHN GREY, AND ALTHOUGH WANNABE IS A LOSER, JOHN GREY IS NOT.

WANNABE: But I’ve been WANNABE since, like, 1999.. How are the fans..

SERGEANT EXTREME: DO NOT CONCERN YOURSELF WITH THE FANS. THE FANS ADMIRE THE MEN WHO WIN, NOT THE ONES WHO HAVE A NAME THAT HOLDS THEM BACK. SECOND, YOU WILL GET RID OF THAT WOMEN’S TITLE AND GO BACK TO BEING A MAN!

WANNABE: but I just got this belt! It’s so clean!

SERGEANT EXTREME: ARE YOU INTERESTED IN BECOMING A WINNER, OR DO YOU WANT TO GO ON BEATING UP POOR DEFENSLESS WOMEN?

WANNABE: Well.. Can I have some time to think about it?

SERGEANT EXTREME: YOU MAKE ME SICK. I WILL GOVE YOU EXACTLY 96 HOURS TO GIVE ME A DECISION.

WANNABE: What is that.. Thursday? I have until Thursday to decide whether or not I want to give back my Women’s belt and allow you to make me into the champion I never was?

SERGEANT EXTREME: THAT IS CORRECT. UNTIL THEN, I WILL BE WATCHING YOUR EVERY MOVE.

WANNABE: Great. I think I liked you better before..

FUZZ
vs. BIGG RIGG
Cell Match

The camera zooms past the cell to FUZZ who is making his way down to the ring . The crowd cheers on he champ as FUZZ checks the cell then steps in and slides into the ring. RIGG walks down to the ring to a chorus of boos. He steps into the cell door then slides in as well. The two men stare each other down as a bloodied CENTURION storms down to the ring!. He slams the door open then slides in and begins slamming his fists into RIGG’s face, and the crowd loves it! FUZZ hops over the top rope, as CENTURION continues working on RIGG! EXTREME WARRIOR steps onto the stage and the audience begins cheering on the cruiserweight champ! Is he here to help CENTURION? He holds the title over his shoulder, and walks down to the ring. FUZZ steps out of the cell. He turns to see EXTREME WARRIOR who leaps past him and jumps on RIGG! The champ drops his belt and tosses a BAT into the cell beside the ring! CENTURION grabs the back of RIGG's head and throws him over the top rope. CENTURION paces around in the ring then notices EXTREME WARRIOR outside of the cell. He climbs out of the ring and walks over to the door. The ref finally grabs him and forces him out of the cell! This isn’t a NO DQ match, and the ref won’t let the match end like this!! EXTREME WARRIOR turns around and gets clotheslined by RIGG! RIGG begins stomping away at both men as FUZZ slides back into the ring. EXTREME WARRIOR crawls away and steps back into the cell, but the ref has had enough! He grabs EW and forces him out of the cell as well, ordering both of them out of the arena! RIGG watches him leave then turns around to get a hard right from FUZZ, as the SENIOR OFFICIAL REES closes the cell door. RIGG stumbles back then falls to one knee. FUZZ yells at RIGG to come on! RIGG stands back up and begins exchanging punches with FUZZ. As FUZZ and RIGG continue battle in the ring, EXTREME WARRIOR heads up the ramp with CENTURION. FUZZ yells something at RIGG, and RIGG gets pissed even more! He slams FUZZ's head into the cell wall. RIGG begins to walk back to the door of the cell, when FUZZ stands back up. RIGG glimpses back to FUZZ, then turns around and walks back to FUZZ. FUZZ grabs the bat and tosses it to the roof of the cell! He then begins climbing the cell and RIGG follows. FUZZ reaches the top of the cell and gets to his feet! RIGG gets to the top and FUZZ starts STOMPING on his fingers! RIGG is in trouble! He grabs at different parts of the roof, trying to avoid the stomping feet of FUZZ! RIGG finally grabs at FUZZ’s ankle! FUZZ steps back, giving RIGG a shot to get to the roof! He scrambles to his feet and FUZZ boots him in the gut, then slams him down on the top of the cage! RIGG gets to his feet and hits a quick arm drag on FUZZ, who flies across the roof of the cell, twenty feet off the ground! FUZZ shoots to his feet and charges at RIGG with a clothesline! RIGG ducks! RIGG goes for a clothesline but FUZZ dodges and pulls back again. RIGG and FUZZ begin exchanging punches fifteen feet above the ring. FUZZ swings again, but RIGG hits a drop toe hold! RIGG kicks FUZZ and slaps his hand across his throat! He’s going to choke slam him! But FUZZ elbows RIGG, and pulls away. RIGG picks up the bat and pulls back to hit FUZZ who leans on his shoulders and kicks him in the face. RIGG drops the bat and stumbles back. FUZZ gets up and kicks RIGG again, but RIGG catches FUZZ’s foot! He quickly scoops him up and hits an inverted DDT! FUZZ'S HEAD GOES THROUGH THE TOP OF THE CELL, BUT ONLY HIS HEAD!!! RIGG stands up and looks down at him, and laughs out loud as FUZZ struggles and tries to avoid being cut by the jagged fencing that makes up the cell!! FUZZ's face is busted open! The blood starts to pour down into the ring!!! RIGG looks down at FUZZ as drops of blood drop down on the canvas below!!! He sees how helpless FUZZ is, and he looks to the crowd, who cheer him on! RIGG grabs FUZZ’s legs and pulls them straight up in the air, then leaps in the air and comes down with a piledriver type drop, which LAUNCHES FUZZ’s body HEAD FIRST through the cell ceiling and crashing into the canvas below! SMASH! FUZZ lands on his NECK!! RIGG sees the whole he created and uses it to jump down into the cell. RIGG looks down at FUZZ and sees that it’s all over. The ref checks on FUZZ and sees that he’s out cold!. The referee is about to call for the bell and a pissed RIGG grabs him! He tells him the match isn’t over! He yells NO DISQUALIFICATIONS at the ref, and the ref says it isn’t a No DQ match! FUZZ’s leg begins to twitch as RIGG and the ref continue to argue. SENIOR OFFICIAL REES gets to the cell wall and yells at RIGG that it isn’t a NO DQ match, then RIGG tells him he can’t let it end like this! This title is HIS! REES looks at him, and AGREES! He tells the ref, and an announcement is made!

”LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, SENIOR OFFICIAL REES HAS OFFICIALLY MADE THIS MATCH A NO DISQUALIFICATION MATCH, THERE MUST BE A WIN BY PINFALL OR SUBMISSION!”

BIGG RIGG has FUZZ beat down completely now, and is stomping on him, even though all he has to do is pin him! He’s sending a message to the XWF, that he’s the best! BIGG RIGG stands FUZZ’s lifeless body up and FUZZ is out on his feet, wobbling back and forth! RIGG sets FUZZ up for The RAGE, but all of a sudden CENTURION runs down the ramp carrying a golf club! SENIOR OFFICIAL REES OPENS THE CELL DOOR and CENTURION runs right in, then jumps into the ring and clocks BIGG RIGG right in the back of the head! RIGG goes out like a light! CENTURION begins to stomp on BIGG RIGG as FUZZ falls to the mat from complete exhaustion and injury. CENTURION tosses BIGG RIGG into the ropes and hits him with The RAGE! CENTURION hit BIGG RIGG with his own finishing move!! And here comes EXTREME WARRIOR down to the ring! He jumps into the ring and up to the top rope top as CENTURION turns around. EXTREME WARRIOR jumps off and NAILS RIGG WITH THE EXTREME AIR! CENTURION smiles as EXTREME WARRIOR gets off and flips off BIGG RIGG. The crowd screams at RIGG, but it’s a mixed reaction! Some of them think he deserved this punishment, but some are beginning to feel his rage and want him to pull through! CENTURION and EXTREME WARRIOR leave the ring with their arms in the air as FUZZ somehow rolls over RIGG and COVERS! 1.. 2.. THR-KICK OUT! The crowd can’t believe it! The cheers continue to grow! RIGG gets to his feet and stumbles to the top rope! The crowd can’t figure out where this amazing survival ability came from! RIGG sets up.. and hits a SHOOTING STAR PRESS!! NO WAY!! HE NAILED IT!! POW!! He bounces into the air, but keeps a grip on FUZZ’s leg, which he uses to pull himself back down on top of him with authority! He hooks the leg! ONE.. TWO.. THREE!! THIS ONE ‘S ALL OVER!! NEW CHAMPION! NEW CHAMPION!! BIGG RIGG DID IT!!

NEW HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION

BIGG RIGG looks down at RIGG, and realizes that nobody tried to help him. The attack was not for FUZZ. FUZZ had no tricks up his sleeve, no hidden syringe. It was just FUZZ, doing his best and trying to win. RIGG helps him up slowly, then raises his arm in victory! The crowd cheers him on, and FUZZ collapses on RIGG’s shoulder! RIGG brings him to the back for medical attention, as the crowd completely supports this man they all hated only twenty minutes ago! The fans cheer RIGG as he helps FUZZ out to the back.

A quick shot in the back shows SUPERBALLS, still in excruciating pain, and holding an ice pack on the bloody front of his trunks, being wheeled out of the arena in a stretcher. He’s loaded into an ambulance and taken away.

MAIN EVENT

JAYDEN BOZE
vs. JASON CASH
Special Referees: JONATHYN & KORE

"Never Gonna Stop Me" by Rob Zombie hits, and CASH heads down to the ring with JONATHYN and JEN JETSON at his side. JONATHYN is wearing a referee uniform and looks very sure of himself. The crowd boos them loudly as JEN gives JASON a quick peck on the cheek for luck, then takes a spot at ringside. JONATHYN and CASH get into the ring, and JONATHYN gives JASON a slap on the back and some words of encouragement.

"Jackass" by Green Day plays, and KORE limps out to a huge cheer, but he’s having a hard time walking, even though he’s trying to hide it! JONATHYN looks up at him and smiles with an evil smirk.

The crowd erupts as "Not Falling" by Mudvayne blasts across the arena, and JAYDEN BOZE hits the ramp. He jogs in place as the crowd cheers him on. Then, like a cat, he takes off towards his opponent! He flies past KORE and the match is on before KORE can even limp to the ring!

BOZE slides into the ring, and throws a heavy handed right hook at the head of CASH. Amazingly, CASH ducks out under the attack and then starts to deliver a series of elbow shots to the head of BOZE! BOZE is backed into the ropes as the crowd cheers. CASH has trouble, but whips BOZE into the ropes. BOZE bounces off and is met with a dropkick that has BOZE clutching his chest and backpedaling into the turnbuckle! JONATHYN watches and stays out of the way, as KORE climbs into the ring. BOZE looks a bit shocked at the athleticism of CASH, and an unrelenting CASH claps his hands and rushes in towards BOZE. CASH jumps up on BOZE, places both feet in his pelvic region, and rolls on his back, flinging BOZE out of the corner with a monkey flip. The crowd starts to cheer heavily, and a pumped up CASH rushes towards BOZE. But the quiet hero catches CASH and slings him down hard with a Powerslam! CASH arches his back up, screaming in pain, and BOZE helps him up to his feet, only to nail him to the ground again with a vicious Sidewalk Slam! This should be it! BOZE goes for a pin! KORE drops down for a quick three! 1.2. JONATHYN kicks KORE over! KORE gets up and JONATHYN yells at him to keep it fair, and teaches him how to count to three nice and slow! BOZE looks a little surprised, but definitely not concerned. He slowly picks up CASH, taunting the crowd in the process. When he gets CASH to his feet, he hoists him up on his shoulders, and rams him to the ground with a DVD!!! CASH is out cold, but BOZE does not go for the pin. Instead, he remains in a sitting position, yelling to the crowd for support. The crowd cheers as he rolls CASH over onto his stomach, and then locks in a Crossface Chicken Wing! CASH doesn't even scream. He must be out cold. JOANTHYN looks at CASH to see if he is OK, and he pushes BOZE away, looking concerned about CASH’s condition! He pulls some smelling salts out of his pocket to revive CASH as BOZE heads over to say something to KORE, when all of a sudden, BOZE is pulled out of the ring by his foot. It's THE ENFORCER!!! BOZE flops to the floor outside the ring and JONATHYN’s secret weapon hovers over him! BOZE looks up at THE ENFORCER in shock and then gets to his feet to attempt a neckbreaker on the giant cloaked beast! But THE ENFORCER blocks the move and whips BOZE into the ring post with relentless velocity! BOZE is knocked out cold! JONATHYN starts the count BOZE out for being out of the ring! ONE!.. TWO!.. THREE!.. KORE rolls out of the ring and tosses BOZE back in, to avoid a count-out! THE ENFORCER grabs KORE and slams his head against the ring post as well! KORE falls back in pain, with his injured leg draped across the ring steps! THE ENFORCER sees the situation, and JONATHYN sees that it’s a perfect opportunity! With BOZE out cold, he points out the situation to CASH, and CASH, who is now awake and alert again, hops down to the ring corner! CASH grabs the top set of steps! With all the power he has left, he raises the heavy steps over his head! OH MY GOD! It’s an exact carbon copy of the injury that sent KORE out of the XWF for a month! IF CASH DROPS THE STEPS, KORE’s LEG MIGHT BE DESTROYED! He holds the steps high and screams out “THIS TIME I’M FINISHING YOU OFF FOR GOOD!”, But JEN JETSON grabs the steps behind JASON! She boots him in the groin from behind, and JASON loses his grip on the steps! They fall flat on his own head! CLANG! JONATHYN looks shocked! He hops out of the ring and grabs JEN, but JEN boots him in the groin as well! Even through the cloaking mask, THE ENFORCER looks confused, but he grabs JEN and she tries to boot him, but he blocks it and pushes her to the ground! JONATHY struggles to get up, but KORE picks him up and boots him hard in the gut! The crowd cheers, and KORE hits the SNAKE EYEZ! JONATHYN is OUT! THE ENFORCER is outnumbered! JEN jumps on his back! KORE tries to UNMASK HIM! THE ENFORCER has no choice! He grabs JEN’s BODY and USES HER TO HIT KORE IN THE FACE! KORE is down, but JEN looks really hurt! THE ENFORCER grabs JONATHYN and JEN and carries them both to the back, one on each shoulder! CASH stumbles into the ring as BOZE gets to his feet! BOZE picks CASH up and hits a scoop slam! CASH gets to his feet, wiping blood off his face. The crowd can’t believe what’s happened here, and they are electrifying the two competitors with the huge ovation! BOZE blocks a right hand by CASH, and rakes his eyes with his right hand. BOZE then slides through the legs of CASH and hops up on the ring apron. Before BOZE can climb back into the ring though, CASH delivers a perfect spinning back kick that lands in the small of BOZE's back, bouncing him off the ropes. BOZE flails his arms, trying to regain balance, but he slowly starts to fall back towards the floor like a tree. CASH catches him in mid air and lands a perfect falling neckbreaker!! After all this, these two are still going at it! And there’s NO REF! CASH gets into the ring as KORE gets to his feet! BOZE helps him up and the two men crawl into the ring together! CASH drops a boot on BOZE, but here comes the ENFORCER again down the ramp! WHAT’S GOING ON? CASH tosses BOZE to the ropes for a clothesline, but BOZE cashes CAHS with a clothesline of his own! BOTH MEN ARE DOWN, and they’re arms are draped across each other! THE ENFORCER slides into the ring and pulls KORE to the canvas by his BAD LEG! He twists it into a massive sharpshooter, and KORE is in AGONY!!! HE CAN’T STAND THE PAIN!! HE’S TAPPING OUT!! KORE IS TAPPING OUT!!! THE BELL RINGS!! What? THE ENFORCER picks KORE up and tosses him out of the ring, then helps JASON to his feet and carries him up the ramp as an announcement is made

”LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, THIS MATCH HAS RESULTED IN A DRAW! THERE IS NO UNIVERSAL CHAMPION!!

KORE gets to his feet and he CAN’T BELIEVE what has happened! When he tapped out of the hold, he slapped the canvas three times, and both men were pinning each other at the time!! NO!! NO!! HOW CAN THIS HAPPEN?

NO UNIVERSAL CHAMPION

The fans can’t believe that after all this controversy, we still have NO UNIVERSAL CHAMP!! Is this a GOOD THING or a BAD THING? There will be a lot of questions to answer on Monday!

NEXT PPV:

JUNE 29, 2003