IS BEING BITTER BETTER?
By Richard Burkard
"Upon scrolling down and reading more of your entries," wrote a first-time visitor to my weblog, "I came to a conclusion. You're a very bitter person."
There's nothing quite like instant analysis, in this era of lightning-fast communication -- only this seemed a bit more like an instant psychoanalysis. The visitor's comments about being "fat" and "lazy" I could handle (though I wondered how he could know I was fat, if he's never seen me before). But for a Christian to be called "bitter" was - well, a bitter pill to take.
I knew of the New Testament warning about such a mood: "Looking diligently lest any man fail of the grace of God; lest any root of bitterness springing up trouble you, and thereby many be defiled...." (Heb. 12:15, King James Version) If I'm bitter, it can rub off on others in a negative way.
So was I a bitter blogger? Even though the next Passover was months off, I decided I needed to "examine myself, whether I be in the faith" (paraphrasing II Cor. 13:5) -- and what I learned in a Bible study on bitterness was surprising. If you face this mood in your life (hopefully only from time to time), you may be surprised as well.
Good and Bitter?
The first person described as "bitter" in the Bible is not Cain, although that label could be applied to him. We find that person in Genesis 27:34: "When Esau heard his father's words, he burst out with a loud and bitter cry...." In modern terms, Esau's brother had just ripped him off -- as brother Jacob put on a disguise to gain a blessing from father Isaac (a blessing Church of God groups contend is for nations of people, even today). That bitterness led to a "grudge against Jacob," to the thought of possibly killing him (v. 41).
We could take this case and the words of Hebrews 12 and conclude right now bitterness is a dangerous, bad, sinful thing. But a deeper probe into the Bible finds several people who could contend something very different.
Consider a woman named Hannah, one of two wives of a believer named Elkanah. While the man's other wife had children, Hannah did not -- and the other wife kept rubbing that fact in (I Sam. 1:2-7). It reached the point where she went to the door of a tabernacle, and "in bitterness of soul Hannah wept much and prayed to the Lord." (1:9-10)
The woman offered a bitter prayer to God - and what happened? "The Lord remembered her. So in the course of time Hannah conceived and gave birth to a son." (1:19-20) God had closed the woman's womb (v. 5), yet that prayer (accompanied with a vow to dedicate her child to the Lord) brought a positive response -- and Hannah wound up giving birth to the great servant Samuel.
God Did It
There's actually a place in the Bible where a servant of God is ordered to be bitter! "Therefore groan, son of man!" is the command in Ezekiel 21:6. "Groan before them with broken heart and bitter grief." It was ordered because Ezekiel's message to Judah would not be a pleasant one.
In addition, several Old Testament characters declared God was the source of their bitterness. "He has filled me with bitter herbs," Jeremiah says poetically (Lam. 3:15) Another declared: "Don't call me Naomi.... Call me Mara, because the Almighty has made my life very bitter." (Ruth 1:20). Job in his grief accused God of taking a pen, to "write down bitter things against me." (Job 13:26; see also 9:18 in KJV) We can even point to Revelation 8:10-11 in the New Testament, where one of the end-time trumpets leads to one-third of the earth's waters becoming bitter.
Assuming these verses are accurate, there actually could be some blessing in bitterness. Judah's King Hezekiah thought so, after God granted him 15 extra years of life instead of letting him expire due to illness. "I will walk humbly all my years because of this anguish [KJV "bitterness"] of my soul.... Surely it was for my benefit that I suffered such anguish." (Isa. 38:15, 17)
Bitter - Bad
Yet when we reach the New Testament, the opinions about bitterness are decidedly negative. "I see that you are full of bitterness and captive to sin" - words said not to me, but to Simon the sorcerer by Peter in Acts 8:23. The apostle drew this conclusion after being offered money for the gift of the Holy Spirit.
James may explain better what Peter saw at that moment: "But if you harbor bitter envy or selfish ambition in your hearts.... Such 'wisdom' does not come down from heaven but is earthly, unspiritual, of the devil." (Jms. 3:14-15) Only a few verses before, James warns brethren in the faith that you can't have both fresh and bitter water from the same spring (vs. 10-11) -- only one or the other.
How do we reconcile these two perspectives? Perhaps by saying this: if bitterness comes into your life - and even if God should bring it to you - don't let it turn into sin by turning selfish. Pour your emotions out to God, asking for His help to work through it into something good. "Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you." (I Pet. 5:7)
How It Happens
What can cause bitterness, besides selfishness and envy? We like to let the Bible define these things, instead of pumping up our own speculation:
* Foolish children (Prv. 17:25).
* Unrighteousness (Rom. 3:10, 14).
* Evil kings - even kings over Israel (II Kng. 14:23-26).
* People who commit adultery (Ecc. 7:26; Prv. 5:3-4).
* Hard labor under ruthless managers (Ex. 1:14).
* Internal squabbling and violence (II Sam. 2:26).
* Perhaps most importantly, forsaking God (Jer. 2:19, 4:17-18; Judg. 5:23) -- or in Peter's case, denying Christ (Mt. 26:75/Lk. 22:62).
Going Deep
Solomon had the insight to see deep-down, "each heart knows its own bitterness" (Prv. 14:10) - not simply some of them. It can even result from the sting of comments from other people, "who whet their tongue like a sword, and bend their bows to shoot their arrows, even bitter words." (Psm. 64:3, KJV)
If my blogged words were taken as bitter words, I'm not sure I really meant them that way -- at least not in the way Strong's Exhaustive Concordance defines "bitter" for this verse: "angry, chafed, discontented." And if the e-mail writer meant bitter in a more standard dictionary way - "sharp and disagreeable; harsh" - well, some of Jesus's comments to the Pharisees about their practices probably came across that way. Would anyone say we have a bitter Savior?
Pulling Out the Root
Church of God ministers love to say there's a cause for every effect. And sometimes when it comes to bitterness, the converse is true: there are effects for every cause. Paul warns in Colossians: "Husbands, love your wives, and be not bitter against them.... Fathers, do not embitter your children, or they will become discouraged." (Col. 3:19, KJV and 3:21, NIV)
If this problem is stockpiled inside you, Paul's message is pointed: "Get rid of all bitterness...." Then replace it with a different trait: "Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you." (Eph. 4:31-32)
As bitter as someone's words can be, the most sobering realization of all is the fact that our lives pass all too quickly. It's no wonder several Bible verses speak of "the bitterness of death." (See I Sam. 15:32 and Job 21:25 for examples.)
The Final Step
For some people, the end of this age will bring bitterness - because the event they probably least expect will happen. Jesus Christ will return.
"They will look on me, the one they have pierced, and they will mourn for him as one mourns for an only child...." (Zech. 12:10) John 19:34-37 shows this verse to be prophetic of Jesus's first coming, and the principle is stated a bit differently in Revelation 1:7 concerning His next coming. When "the great day of the Lord" arrives, "the mighty man shall cry there bitterly.... because they have sinned against the Lord...." (Zeph. 1:14, 17; KJV)
God offers a future beyond this life which is not bitter, but happy. He wants to "present you before his glorious presence without fault and with great joy...." (Jude 24) Where? In a kingdom of God that is "of righteousness, peace and joy in the Holy Spirit." (Rom 14:17) Reach for that kingdom by living a kind and compassionate way, and look for good results from God in whatever bitter pills you have to take.
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© 2005 Richard Burkard, All Rights Reserved.